Neglecting social life in teens and early 20s means you're screwed for life.

JaegerPilot217

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I also heard that being bullied a lot in childhood can make a person socially awkward later on in life
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

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JaegerPilot217 said:
I also heard that being bullied a lot in childhood can make a person socially awkward later on in life
I think it has more to do with family than bullying. Kids from strict families that discipline them a lot tend to display socially awkward behavior later on in life.
 

Mike32ct

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HowardHughesDicaprio said:
I think it has more to do with family than bullying. Kids from strict families that discipline them a lot tend to display socially awkward behavior later on in life.
It's both. The strict families produce a very quiet, studious kid that becomes a bigger target for bullying. So he gets shyte from his parents AND other kids.

Even if the kid never gets bullied per se, being ignored and left out will F him up over time and make him more socially awkward.

It's all the perfect storm for social awkwardness. It starts out genetic as Pair says, then add in the strict parents like HHD just said, then add in being rejected/ignored and/or bullied as I noted, and you sadly may have an intelligent kid with potential being royally screwed socially and even career-wise through no fault of his own.
 

JaegerPilot217

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Mike32ct said:
It's both. The strict families produce a very quiet, studious kid that becomes a bigger target for bullying. So he gets shyte from his parents AND other kids.

Even if the kid never gets bullied per se, being ignored and left out will F him up over time and make him more socially awkward.

It's all the perfect storm for social awkwardness. It starts out genetic as Pair says, then add in the strict parents like HHD just said, then add in being rejected/ignored and/or bullied as I noted, and you sadly may have an intelligent kid with potential being royally screwed socially and even career-wise through no fault of his own.
I guess it just snowballs early on
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

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Mike32ct said:
It's both. The strict families produce a very quiet, studious kid that becomes a bigger target for bullying. So he gets shyte from his parents AND other kids.

Even if the kid never gets bullied per se, being ignored and left out will F him up over time and make him more socially awkward.

It's all the perfect storm for social awkwardness. It starts out genetic as Pair says, then add in the strict parents like HHD just said, then add in being rejected/ignored and/or bullied as I noted, and you sadly may have an intelligent kid with potential being royally screwed socially and even career-wise through no fault of his own.
You see this happen in certain cultures a lot more often, particularly with Asians and Indians here in America. Middle Eastern guys get it to a small extent but their dads raise them to be more masculine. Indians and Asians have those overly protective kind of parents that beat them for the smallest things, make them socially awkward, and in the end you have a kid with the best grades and even a degree from a good university that struggles with women. I think your post might have explained why we have so many Asian and Indian AFCs who whine about not being able to get girls of other races.

This right here is a good example of what I am talking about, the video has over 1 million views. Indian kid pulls a prank on his dad. Notice how in the start when he is talking to his dad, all his dad does is ignore him and not even respond. Then out of nowhere notice the sudden violence the dad resorts to as soon as the bad news comes. The kid here is going to be one socially awkward guy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYCHpnMgTEM
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

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JaegerPilot217 said:
I guess it just snowballs early on
Yes, success stories do exist but they are not common. Most of these kids (Asians and Indians) will go off to well respected schools and have their parents pay for their college. A lot of them will probably major in what their parents demand they major in and then live socially awkward lives in college that involve studying, junk food, and videogames. Most of these guys will walk out of college as virgins and not realize they just missed out on the best 4 years of their lives. Reason being that these guys were too busy trying to convince themselves that their nerdy lifestyle was superior, they longed for the hot girls on campus but had no realistic shot of being with them. They will continue to sham the idea of getting laid in college and pre-marital sex while deeply wanting it.

Then as they get older they will look back and start to try and relive those years through PUA and all this other stuff if they are lucky.

For the rest (especially indians), it is going to be about getting an arranged marriage to a woman you won't like, living a job you don't have much passion for, and raising your kids the same way your parents raised you. I have been around so many orientals in my life and had friends from those backgrounds to know that they are scared of their parents even when they are 25.
 

donjuanapprentice01

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JaegerPilot217 said:
I also heard that being bullied a lot in childhood can make a person socially awkward later on in life
Yes, this applied to me. When you go to school, and you get treated like crap, it affects your self esteem. Way worse when you are younger. The scars lasted a long time. I had difficulty in college due to this. I never really hung out with more than a couple close friends and never did I have any success with women. I didnt lose my virginity until 29! I know, its embarassing, but its the truth. But it all changed tho, thanks to this site, and changes I made for myself. I'm no longer an introvert, no longer a chump like I used to be. I have friends, I have women. I was a late bloomer but it's all worth it now.
 

Mike32ct

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Great points HHD.

Or sometimes what I've seen in some white families is two brothers coming out the complete opposite. Again, I'm guessing a difference in genetics plays the initial role. (Obviously I'm not referring to the rare case of identical twins. I just mean two brothers in general.)

They both have the same strict parents that yell a lot. But one son turns inward and becomes more and more shy and timid. The other son rebels and becomes the bad boy who yells and argues with his parents a lot.

Do I need to even tell the rest of the story lol? The aggressive bad boy son gets plenty of girls and gets laid at a young age. The shy timid son end up as the late bloomer.
 

HowardHughesDicaprio

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The more I think about it, the less benefits there are to being a late bloomer, it is almost an insult rather than something to be proud of.
 

JaegerPilot217

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donjuanapprentice01 said:
Yes, this applied to me. When you go to school, and you get treated like crap, it affects your self esteem. Way worse when you are younger. The scars lasted a long time. I had difficulty in college due to this. I never really hung out with more than a couple close friends and never did I have any success with women. I didnt lose my virginity until 29! I know, its embarassing, but its the truth. But it all changed tho, thanks to this site, and changes I made for myself. I'm no longer an introvert, no longer a chump like I used to be. I have friends, I have women. I was a late bloomer but it's all worth it now.
Glad you changed that
 
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