Need your advice on how to handle this situation

[bario]

Met this girl on social media and we briefly texted (and couple phone calls) for less than 2 weeks. Then I had setup a date with her. I noticed couple days before the proposed date, she took some time to reply to my texts. I didn't double text her until a day before to confirm the meeting, but no reply since!

Today, 10 days or so after, she texts and says: "Hey, I'm sorry, I felt scared and not sure what to do. I'd like to invite you for a drink if you're still interested".

What would you do in this situation? (Accept her invitation, NEXT without even replying, etc).

 

[saige]

It looks like she's still interested to me. She might've forgotten the text briefly, read it in her head and/or planned to respond to it later (happens to a lot of people, including me) and she even asked about drinks directly in her reply.

I know it may seem like a sign of low interest or boredom initially, but I think her response says a lot tbh. Also the fact that she added she was scared for a reason adds to some sort of explanation for the late message. I'd def proceed if you're still interested!

 

[BillyPilgrim]

FFS what a pu$$y this girl is. "I'm scared" - gtfo with that nonsense

Does she even know what a penis looks like? Does she need Mommy to chaperone and hold her hand when you meet? Do you need to meet her in her designated safe space?

Next her, OP.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Today, 10 days or so after, she texts and says: "Hey, I'm sorry, I felt scared and not sure what to do. I'd like to invite you for a drink if you're still interested".

What would you do in this situation? (Accept her invitation, NEXT without even replying, etc).

Send her a reply which reads as follows: "The fact that you're feeling scared when we haven't even met indicates that you have psychological troubles to rectify, before jumping into the dating pool. I wish you luck in finding a skillful Cognitive Behavioral Therapist, who has no compunction about being brutally honest with his clients"

 

[Dean Gladwyn]

I would accept that offer for the new date because she looks like she is telling the truth and she got cold feet. Plus she had enough decency to message you about it rather than just ghost you completely.

 

[bario]

Thanks guys! Would love to hear more opinions from other fellas
I'm already speaking to other women in the meantime though.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Women are highly indecisive by nature if they aren't sure about a situation 9/10 they would rather run or hide from it than confront it

I actually think this girl seems genuine ..... it's RARE for a woman to acknowledge her emotions and actually apologise and be accountable for them I would take this as a green flag

Vast majority of indecisive women I come across in these types of situations will just outright ghost which is incredibly disrespectful and infuriating

Also 10 days is a fair chunk of time you've clearly been on her mind which is another good sign

I see nothing to lose in playing along here OP

 

[Clockwerk50]

“Everybody gets one” - Spiderman

 

[The Duke]

I'd proceed with caution and only if I didn't have anything better going on. This same type of indecisiveness because she is afraid will manifest itself in other areas in a relationship.

I quit giving women credit for doing what they should have done previously. You think they do that for guys? Lmfao.

I don't buy their excuses either. She's not telling you what exactly she was afraid of. Probably another dude tugging on her heart strings.

Schitt or Get. I'm not here to fuhk around unless it involves my dihk.

 

[bario]

Thanks all. I will proceed with caution and accept her new offer. Nothing to lose anyway. But the moment I'll feel something is not right even the slightest I will drop/next forever.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Send her a reply which reads as follows: "The fact that you're feeling scared when we haven't even met indicates that you have psychological troubles to rectify, before jumping into the dating pool. I wish you luck in finding a skillful Cognitive Behavioral Therapist, who has no compunction about being brutally honest with his clients"

To be fair, this applies to half the OLD dating pool over 30.

 

[Bingo-Player]

To be fair, this applies to half the OLD dating pool over 30.

Way more than half

Some very very serious psychological issues within females from about 28+ on dating apps

 

[PlatoPacks23]

Thanks all. I will proceed with caution and accept her new offer. Nothing to lose anyway. But the moment I'll feel something is not right even the slightest I will drop/next forever.

anyone giving you advice to "move on" after SHE initiated an apology is insane. WTF?

try again ,but yeah if she flakes again it's not happening. been there a lot buddy, but still it's only first time she did this! good luck

 

[RangerMIke]

The only advice I can give anyone initiating contact through social media is what you are seeing a person (not just women) post on platforms isn't really who they are, it is what they want people to believe they are.

It's also as @Bingo-Player stated. Women will use avoidance when they are unsure of a situation. The best way to deal with this tendency is to just be patient, it's okay to let them know you are still interested, but don't push. If you push... you are only feeding her insecurity and re-enforcing her concern that you are potentially a scarry dude.

Remember EVERY woman stories of men that scared her with stalking and over pursuit.... they have active radar with behavior like this. Let women know you are interested but let her come to you... she will only do this if she trusts you.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Have a drink with her and then punish her behavior in the bedroom to make sure she knows not to do it again with you.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hey Bario,
Have a laugh,back in the Day I arranged to meet a Young Nurse,claimed she was a very self confident Girl,So the arrangement was I would wear a blue shirt sit outside a well known Coffee shop....So I am sitting there like Jacky,as arranged....The mobile rings,"Hello Scarra,is that you sitting out there on the corner table?"..."Sure it is I will lift my hand where are you?""I'm sitting in my car,watching you through binoculars on the opposite side of the Street about four hundred yards up the Road"....Never saw Hair nor hide of her again!it takes all kinds to make a World.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

There is no room for interpretation.
Invite her straight to your place and pour a shot of grape vodka in her wine which makes transitioning to the bang smoother. Give her the fear of God for making a man wait.

 

[MatureDJ]

Met this girl on social media and we briefly texted (and couple phone calls) for less than 2 weeks. Then I had setup a date with her. I noticed couple days before the proposed date, she took some time to reply to my texts. I didn't double text her until a day before to confirm the meeting, but no reply since!

Today, 10 days or so after, she texts and says: "Hey, I'm sorry, I felt scared and not sure what to do. I'd like to invite you for a drink if you're still interested".

What would you do in this situation? (Accept her invitation, NEXT without even replying, etc).

I'd accept and see if her attitude gets better with time. That said, there is a high probability that she is a loony.

EDIT: I've just remembered that all the women that agree to see me more than once are loony.

 

[MatureDJ]

Hey Bario,
Have a laugh,back in the Day I arranged to meet a Young Nurse,claimed she was a very self confident Girl,So the arrangement was I would wear a blue shirt sit outside a well known Coffee shop....So I am sitting there like Jacky,as arranged....The mobile rings,"Hello Scarra,is that you sitting out there on the corner table?"..."Sure it is I will lift my hand where are you?""I'm sitting in my car,watching you through binoculars on the opposite side of the Street about four hundred yards up the Road"....Never saw Hair nor hide of her again!it takes all kinds to make a World.

She had determined that you were too short.