ink_wizard
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 26, 2010
- Messages
- 124
- Reaction score
- 7
Hi All,
So I've just recently ended a situationship that has really cut me up. I was talking to a girl who lived in another city, she was 30 and I'm 31.We met on a dating app when she was in my city but was leaving on the day we started talking so I didn't get the chance to meet her. I was apprehensive about getting involved with her because I had done a LDR before and it turned out badly but she hooked me in with how eager she was to get to know me and back then I wasn't having any luck with girls down here. We start talking everyday and face time about 2-3 times a week. There were red flags that I noticed in the beginning like she's a big party girl and gets hammered every weekend, has tons of male friends, strong political views which I didn't really agree with but went along with it because I just wanted to get laid lol bad I know. Despite our differences she reeled me in good and wanted so bad to meet me because she really liked me and wanted me bad. We did start getting really close and I felt like I was starting to catch feels for her and she admitted the same for me.
So I book flights to go and see her for the weekend. It didn't go as great as I had planned. We went all 3 days of the weekend (Friday to sunday) clubbing and meeting her friends and in those days she got completely smashed and I noticed she had a major drinking problem. She drank so much to the point I had to help her out of the bars and drive her home where she passed out and got sick everywhere for the whole 3 days. We did have sex a couple of times but there was no sexual chemistry at all, it was sh1t. Despite before we met and we used to talk about it, it felt like we did have lots of sexual chemistry so that was disappointing. She also sometimes takes party drugs which doesn't help either.
On the times where she was sober, we did have some alone time together but I could tell straight up that we were completely different people and lead completely different lifestyles and I think she knew it as well. When I got back home she went completely cold and distant and told me that we were not compatible and she "wasn't ready for a relationship" despite telling me before we met that she was lol, she wants to stay friends though. I tell her all good I don't think we are compatible either and I don't really want to be friends with her because I don't particularly want to hear about her getting with other dudes and about all her drunken shannighans she gets herself in to it along with the fact she lives in another state anyway. She got really upset about it and deleted me off all social media networks and pretty much says fine and wishes me the best in life.
Gone complete NC for the past couple of days and I haven't heard from her. Was I wrong to not stay friends? Im also really mad at myself for ignoring all the red flags she was throwing at the start. We got on so well that I ignored it and thought I'd take a chance and it ended badly.
How can I be so stupid?! Waste of time and energy and money. Never again. Finding chicks locally has also been a nightmare. I don't live in a big city so I don't have a lot of prospects. I think I'm just at a stage in life where I'm just completely done with the whole dating game. I've been dating and off for so many years and have had nothing but heart break and disappointment. There's only so much one can take before they snap and hang it all up. So so done. Just going to pursue my hobbies and totally ignore dating in the foreseeable future.
So I've just recently ended a situationship that has really cut me up. I was talking to a girl who lived in another city, she was 30 and I'm 31.We met on a dating app when she was in my city but was leaving on the day we started talking so I didn't get the chance to meet her. I was apprehensive about getting involved with her because I had done a LDR before and it turned out badly but she hooked me in with how eager she was to get to know me and back then I wasn't having any luck with girls down here. We start talking everyday and face time about 2-3 times a week. There were red flags that I noticed in the beginning like she's a big party girl and gets hammered every weekend, has tons of male friends, strong political views which I didn't really agree with but went along with it because I just wanted to get laid lol bad I know. Despite our differences she reeled me in good and wanted so bad to meet me because she really liked me and wanted me bad. We did start getting really close and I felt like I was starting to catch feels for her and she admitted the same for me.
So I book flights to go and see her for the weekend. It didn't go as great as I had planned. We went all 3 days of the weekend (Friday to sunday) clubbing and meeting her friends and in those days she got completely smashed and I noticed she had a major drinking problem. She drank so much to the point I had to help her out of the bars and drive her home where she passed out and got sick everywhere for the whole 3 days. We did have sex a couple of times but there was no sexual chemistry at all, it was sh1t. Despite before we met and we used to talk about it, it felt like we did have lots of sexual chemistry so that was disappointing. She also sometimes takes party drugs which doesn't help either.
On the times where she was sober, we did have some alone time together but I could tell straight up that we were completely different people and lead completely different lifestyles and I think she knew it as well. When I got back home she went completely cold and distant and told me that we were not compatible and she "wasn't ready for a relationship" despite telling me before we met that she was lol, she wants to stay friends though. I tell her all good I don't think we are compatible either and I don't really want to be friends with her because I don't particularly want to hear about her getting with other dudes and about all her drunken shannighans she gets herself in to it along with the fact she lives in another state anyway. She got really upset about it and deleted me off all social media networks and pretty much says fine and wishes me the best in life.
Gone complete NC for the past couple of days and I haven't heard from her. Was I wrong to not stay friends? Im also really mad at myself for ignoring all the red flags she was throwing at the start. We got on so well that I ignored it and thought I'd take a chance and it ended badly.
How can I be so stupid?! Waste of time and energy and money. Never again. Finding chicks locally has also been a nightmare. I don't live in a big city so I don't have a lot of prospects. I think I'm just at a stage in life where I'm just completely done with the whole dating game. I've been dating and off for so many years and have had nothing but heart break and disappointment. There's only so much one can take before they snap and hang it all up. So so done. Just going to pursue my hobbies and totally ignore dating in the foreseeable future.