need some pointers

[Dummy]

Ok. A little background. Well this woman I've been talkin to is a single mother of two boys. (Yeah I know the whole single mother thing. I'm thirty it's hard to find childless woman my age.) Anyway, I've been chattin with her, met her at the bar a few times, kinda hit it off. Ya know how it goes. Never did anything with her yet. We basically talk a little on the phone. Text each other stupid crap.

We had a date set up a few weeks ago on a Sunday, but the weather was horrendous. So I told her some other time. She was cool with it told me to call her whenever.

We've been texting back and forth lately. I work in a shop so I can't talk on the phone so we text. On Tuesday we were texting and I told her I had a dream we had a baby together. This is where it gets good. I told her she probably thinks I'm weird now. I really did have this dream too which is creepy to me. Then she says she's off to bed and good night. She texts back: It's a little weird but was it a boy or a girl? I told her a girl. She's told me she wants a girl real bad in the past. I tell her goodnight.

The next day she texts me one of those random texts thingamajigers. Finish this sentence: Someday you and I will .....
I didnt reply til Thursday. I told her I felt scared answering that cuz she would think all I want is sex. I text back after that. Saying what i sent her was cheesy. lol. No reply but she plays that game if I wait a day she waits a day or longer to respond.
I know it's frakkin corny stuff what i just typed but oh well.

What does she mean by sending that text thingy? Is it just some random stupid crap or is it what i think it was her falling asleep after I tell her the baby stuff and her dreaming about it too getting her all excited? Just some usual chic crapola isn't it? haha

 

[mintxx]

words fail me. i don't think you do know the 'whole single mother thing'.
i don't want to be an azzhole but just do some reading, there are plenty of sob stories that started out like yours.

 

[DavenJuan]

Orignally quoted by Dummy
Ok. A little background. Well this woman I've been talkin to is a single mother of two boys. (Yeah I know the whole single mother thing. I'm thirty it's hard to find childless woman my age.) Anyway, I've been chattin with her, met her at the bar a few times, kinda hit it off. Ya know how it goes. Never did anything with her yet. We basically talk a little on the phone. Text each other stupid crap.

We had a date set up a few weeks ago on a Sunday, but the weather was horrendous. So I told her some other time. She was cool with it told me to call her whenever.

We've been texting back and forth lately. I work in a shop so I can't talk on the phone so we text. On Tuesday we were texting and I told her I had a dream we had a baby together. This is where it gets good. I told her she probably thinks I'm weird now. I really did have this dream too which is creepy to me. Then she says she's off to bed and good night. She texts back: It's a little weird but was it a boy or a girl? I told her a girl. She's told me she wants a girl real bad in the past. I tell her goodnight.

The next day she texts me one of those random texts thingamajigers. Finish this sentence: Someday you and I will .....
I didnt reply til Thursday. I told her I felt scared answering that cuz she would think all I want is sex. I text back after that. Saying what i sent her was cheesy. lol. No reply but she plays that game if I wait a day she waits a day or longer to respond.
I know it's frakkin corny stuff what i just typed but oh well.

What does she mean by sending that text thingy? Is it just some random stupid crap or is it what i think it was her falling asleep after I tell her the baby stuff and her dreaming about it too getting her all excited? Just some usual chic crapola isn't it? haha[/QUOTE]


dummy...DUMMY...DUMMY!??

After this you think she is actually 'dreaming about her having a baby with you too" ???

you have placed sooo much negative energy and thoughts on her without doing or saying much of anything.

"creepy"
"scared"
"weird"
"having a baby with her"

this isnt anything that is making her feel like you are a strong confident challenging MAN.

..and it all starts with YOUR train of thought. why call yourself "DummY' ?

we live our lives out as what we THINK we are... thats it.

change the name

 

[Jeffst1980]

I don't know what to make of your post. You have A LOT of reading to do.

This situation does not warrant analyzing. Here's why:

1) You've never done anything with this girl
2) You haven't been out with this girl
3) You've already made it quite clear to her that you have no other options--that's even gonna scare off single moms.
4) You're actually ASKING HOW TO RESPOND TO A SILLY TEXT GAME

Forget this girl; you need to change how you interact with females altogether.

Here's your blunders:

-TEXTING TOO MUCH. I will occasionally text a girl I just met something funny that reminds me of her. But that's it. No conversations. Conversations are done in person. You haven't even been out with her yet--right now you have a pen pal.

-TELLING HER YOU HAD A CREEPY DREAM ABOUT HAVING A BABY WITH HER. Wtf??? It may be amusing, but at this stage you've got to keep it to yourself. It's going to creep her out because YOU HAVEN'T BEEN OUT WITH HER. I GUARANTEE that she's told all her friends about that one. This demonstrates a clear lack of options--at this stage, you should AT LEAST give the illusion that you might be interested in other girls.

-TELLING HER YOU DON'T WANT TO COME OFF AS THOUGH ALL YOU WANT IS SEX. Wtf?? YOU HAVEN'T BEEN OUT WITH HER. Don't bring up sex until you actually HAVE sex. Convey your sexuality nonverbally until then. IF SHE brings up sex, tell her 'whoa, slow down...I don't know even know you yet.' By sending this text, you AGAIN communicate to her that you're obsessed with her and want to be a relationship with her...even though YOU HAVEN'T BEEN OUT WITH HER YET.

-COUNTING THE DAYS BETWEEN TEXTS. You're an adult. You shouldn't be doing that game. I text back as soon as I get the text. It doesn't make me needy; that's just how I communicate with everyone. Don't read into how she returns texts.

At this point, this woman may be enjoying the attention, but she's no longer viewing you in a sexual light. You put the cart before the horse and drove her interest level from moderately high to zilch by acting like you're in a relationship with a girl YOU HAVEN'T BEEN OUT WITH.

>"What does she mean by sending that text thingy? Is it just some random >stupid crap or is it what i think it was her falling asleep after I tell her the >baby stuff and her dreaming about it too getting her all excited? "

Oh man...do you HONESTLY think that's what happened?? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE start reading the don juan bible.

Sorry if this came off as harsh.

You did do some things right by initially attracting her and setting up a date. That's the hardest part--and that PROVES that you have what it takes to attract girls. Now, you have to learn to not mess things up by giving away your hand too early. Hit the books and you'll have this figured out in no time.

 

[NewMan]

There is no way this is legite.

Look at the screen name - says it all.

 

[SharpGame]

There is no way this is legite.

Look at the screen name - says it all.

I was thinking the same thing - gotta be a troll.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I was thinking the same thing - gotta be a troll.

None the less, lot's of good advise on this thread!!

 

[jophil28]

I didnt reply til Thursday. I told her I felt scared answering that cuz she would think all I want is sex. I text back after that. Saying what i sent her was cheesy. lol.

So you really 'kind of' apologised to her IN CASE she thought you were having lustful thoughts about her and then you text her AGAIN saying that your previous text was "cheesy" ??
Then she went silent , right ?

Hmmmm, no wonder.

 

[Zaius]

She was flirting with you dude.
If it were me I would've given response like - "have a stroll on the beach, just you and me". Just to get her little heart going.
Don't wait a couple of days to reply either, by then the moment has long gone.

 

[Sinistar]

On Tuesday we were texting and I told her I had a dream we had a baby together. This is where it gets good. I told her she probably thinks I'm weird now. I really did have this dream too which is creepy to me. Then she says she's off to bed and good night. She texts back: It's a little weird but was it a boy or a girl? I told her a girl. She's told me she wants a girl real bad in the past. I tell her goodnight.

...if this part is really true our Dummy might have stumbled onto another quirk in the matrix. Her IL didn't exactly drop on this line? Only a pathetic AFC or very confident guy would dare say it. The later would then make fun of it on the next contact which would have her guessing and wondering while not feeling it was too serious to spook her. And notice her initial response - it wasn't a brick in the face or flakesville. She actually kept the topic going.

The next day she texts me one of those random texts thingamajigers. Finish this sentence: Someday you and I will .....

Dummy: ...rob a bank, run off to Fiji, Fvck like wild animals for 2 weeks, gamble it all away, and get it a big fight when you catch me with the 19yr waitress from the resort "

...that response would have indicate major confidence, mega c0ckiness yet kept the whole thing lighthearted, non-threatening and covertly s3xual.

I told her I felt scared answering that cuz she would think all I want is sex. I text back after that. Saying what i sent her was cheesy. lol. No reply but she plays that game if I wait a day she waits a day or longer to respond.

...wow you did everything wrong possible right here. You said you felt scared (she just got more insecure around you). You indicated you were worried all you wanted was s3x (now she knows you want intimacy but are too scared and meek to take it from her). And you responded to often and too soon to boot.

It's funny she tolerated you AFC clinginess (ie texting every 46 minutes for days). And although your line about kids together should have blundered she remained hooked. All you had to do is remain C&F from that point and back off the teenager texting and she never would have flaked on you.

Then again this is a single mommie.