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need some advice

nolesfan

Don Juan
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Hi guys

I have been talking to this girl for the past month and a half and everything has been great (sex, conversations, just hanging out with each other) and she has basically mentioned things indicating she wants exclusivity like "are you seeing anyone else" and when im gone "no one is allowed to sleep on my side of the bed (playfully)"..... now we have not solidified any exlcusivity as far as i know.

So she is currently in Cancun for a week with her good friend (female) and we have talked here and there and still the same kind of banter and messages have occurred. Well, last night she went out to this club and she was posting stuff on her general snapchat story which she knows i can see, and there were a couple of pictures of her and her friend and then this one guy they must have met, and then there was a picture of her and the guy with what looked like he was behind her dancing?.....then several others of after the club where it seemed to be just her and her friend and her waiting on a bus to get back to the hotel for awhile.

It seems as though nothing happened with this guy, but should i dig any deeper and see. I feel like i am being insecure about this situation and i want to maintain a strong frame and personally not feel like something has happened, but sometimes these things keep bothering me. I havent talked to her since like 2 pm yesterday and she hasnt texted me since. I was just going to wait to see if texts me and what its like. Now, if she mentions something about her hooking up with the guy, my response is simple that I will more than likely end the communication with her, but if she doesnt bring it up, Im not sure I should in order to not look insecure or girlish. I know I am the ****ing man, and she is lucky to be with me when she is, but I just dont want to be disrespected by her doing what she wants not caring if it has an effect on me (that is if she did fool around with this guy). Any advice or thoughts are appreciated!
 

nolesfan

Don Juan
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If this is a **** test I also dont want to fail by accusing her of stuff that never even happened
 

dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
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You are not exclusive.....don't worry about it. Continue to have fun with her if you want. Next if that's what you think you need to do.
 

nolesfan

Don Juan
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alright, so do you guys think i should ask anything about her night or just wait for her to text me next?
 

nolesfan

Don Juan
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thanks guys,

I am definitely not spinning other female plates (just work, golf, and other things i like to do that take up my time) and I see the oneitis is definitely creeping in and I dont like it

I appreciate the responses and continue to use these and the DJ bible mantras in order to continue to evolve into the mindset of a true Don Juan. I am light years of where I used to be 2.5 years ago coming off a divorce and I have this site and you guys to thank.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
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If she had any intention of fooling around with that guy, then she would have not put that pic on snapshat for you to see.
 

LiveYourDream

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She hinted she wants to be exclusive. You choose not to respond and make it so. She is acutely aware of that. She doesn't want you seeing/sleeping with other women. She wants you all to herself. She wants you to feel the same way about her. She posted a picture to try to spark a little rise of concern or slight jealously, so by the time she gets home, you will have thought about it enough and missed her enough, that YOU will 'finally'(in her view) initiate and close the deal of being exclusive with her.
 
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nolesfan

Don Juan
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hmmmm i never thought of that.....but one thing I am pretty sure I learned was never to ask for exclusivity as the guy, that should come from her correct?
 

LiveYourDream

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hmmmm i never thought of that.....but one thing I am pretty sure I learned was never to ask for exclusivity as the guy, that should come from her correct?
The common thought seems to be that men should not bring up exclusivity. Let her bring it up again. If it is what YOU want, then next time she hints, tease her about very slightly, confirming that's what she is asking for. If it is, and you have expectations that go with being exclusive, make them clearly known to her at that time and then simply confirm her agreement.
 

daddymonsterpoodle

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So what if she has hooked up. Don't be a hypocrite. Think about wearing a condom if you aren't already. While she is gone go and have some fun. Flirt and socialise...
 
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