Need help with clinginess/neediness

[L3D_ZEPP3LIN]

Hello all!

I have a bit of an issue regarding being clingy in relationships and well, it's gotten to the point where it drives me and I'm sure my girlfriend crazy. But a little background...

Both my girlfriend and I are 16, and I was never smooth with girls or anything. I have a very outgoing personality and all (I'm like the class clown) but I just don't understand how relationships are supposed to go. It didn't help either when I dated an 8th grader. At the time, I had just finished 1st year of HS and she had gotten out of 7th grade. Now she (the 8th grader) was a rather clingy one. Always texting me from the second I got up until the second her parents made her go to bed. Well, I need some advice on how often I should text/call and some help on not being clingy in relationships would be greatly appreciated.

If y'all need anymore information about any of my exes, current girlfriend, me, or anything that this website considers acceptable, let me know...

 

[Nino-Tk]

Ask yourself why you are needy? Are you afraid of losing her? You don't want to be single again?

When in doubt, check you intentions. I don't count how many times I should call or text a girl, its irrelevant because I know I'm not clingy. So, figure out the reason why you are clingy. Play the "why" game. Write down why you are needy, then ask why, get another reason, then ask again until it can't go any further.

In my humble opinion, you beat clinginess once you stop putting a girl's company above your own. Once you realise that instead of worrying about losing her and holding on to her for dear life, how about she worries about losing you. Excuse the ramble haha.

 

[Drook]

Start off by reading Pook's posts if you haven't already. A lot of his stuff is on self worth which it sounds like you need.

Second, think about what else you have asides from your chick. If you can't think of anything good off of the top of your head get some hobbies. Start a running program, pick up an instrument, whatever. When you have a life outside of your girlfriend, even if she's a bombshell, you don't worry as much about losing her. Why would you be clinging to your girlfriend when you have a 5k in a week? You wouldn't. You wouldn't even have time to.

If you already have these things take a step back like Nino said and question why you're clinging to her so much. Communicating is good and all but if you think you're clinging you probably are.

 

[L3D_ZEPP3LIN]

After a little thought, I think I'm clingy because I'm really into her and I always want to communicate with her and perhaps I'm a bit afraid of losing her even though I'm almost positive she won't be leaving me. I do have a few hobbies though. I play trumpet in my marching band, and I'm usually working on my car, but I always get this uneasy feeling in my stomach if I don't communicate with her sometime throughout the day. I'm still trying to figure out why.