Need help Quick. Like the next 3 hrs!

[salinechow]

Took this girl out. She is 21 and Im over 10 years older. We had a great time. Perfect date. Kino to the max. She always said she had a BF but towards the end of the date she started to say that maybe he wasnt exactly her boyfriend. So , I threw my car in park and tried to kiss her. Denied, Tried again, Denied again. Drove her home. On the way home she asked if I had female friends. And proceeded to LJBF me. I told her all those slots were filled and I had no interest in friends. She got mad and I told her lets just not talk about it anymore and see what the future holds some other time but that without romantic interest we probably wouldnt see eachother again.

I have seen her casually at her place of work a few times since and we have mutual aquantiances. Some days I was plesent but distant with her. Other days I completly ignored her. One time I even invited her for an overnight to casino and she told me her boyfriend was good at cards. So, I kept my frame, but interupted her and asked her "Then when will you be reschuduling with me" She started to say how busy she was so I basically just walked away from her mid sentance. I have never texted her or called her or anything like that.

Today, she starts complaining about her computer. So I told her Ill fix it for her. Bring it to the store where she works and Ill take a look. She says"Na, you can just come over my house to fix it for me." So I say "K. Whatever" I soon as I leave she texts. "When can you come by today. I get off at 4pm" I waited, and told her I was busy and asked her what time was she thinking? She says anytime after 4 but how about 6ish."

Boys!? What do I do!? Professional? Create want? Kino? Go for the kill? Long play? Indiffereance? I mean she is inviting me to her house! Make her buy me drinks? But why would I want to leave the place I would try to get her back too. Sh!t this is a weird one. Go. Fast! Thanks men.

 

[GS750]

Tell her you'll be there a 6pm and then flake. Doesn't seem like she's interested, but she doesn't mind having you do favors for her.

 

[djthiago1]

Can't you see her mentioning bf all the time ,you won't have sex with her, also stop doing stuff for women you barelly know.
You fix her crap, and boyfriend eats da pvssy, that's how i'm seeing this.

 

[Meisterman]

She doesn't sound that interested. If you do decide to go there, initiate, and she still has you in the LJBF zone, get the hell out of there and go NC immediately. You can still fix her computer though since you said you would. Trying to pursue it any further at that point only compromises your dignity and self respect. Move on and if she hits you up you can take it from there if she is worthy of a second chance. But only respond to her if she clearly wants the D. Tell her your phone plan doesn't cover the 'friend zone' :crackup:

She'll never be interested if she knows you're just waiting for her, always available, and with no better options. You have to show her you are willing to walk away at any moment and commit to that. Each time you talk to her and do favors for her in the context of 'being friends' it just further solidifies that's all you'll ever be.

 

[salinechow]

Update!

So I ended up going over her place about 6pm. She answered the door in the most dressed down get up imaginable. Pajamas, cooking apron, and slippers. I thought right away- OK she doesn’t care at all about her appearance with me so I am definitely in the friend zone here. Oh well, lets ride this out.

P.S( I got a new plate spinning last weekend that ended up in a date and hook up the night before last. I mention this for 2 reasons, 1. Again, this site and you men are right, you must be dating multiple chicks at all times in order to keep a better frame. 2. The hook up chick is better looking but also less desirable for reasons and details I wont share right now. Again though it helps you keep your frame and confidence when dealing with a chick who is less into you.)

This girl made me dinner! A nice one at that. She can cook. 21 Year old from South America and can cook makes a 6/10 a 7/10. Anyway, also, her laptop that I went there to fix really wasn’t having issues and neither was her other tech issues she had me come over for. My assessment: she was lonely, she is leaving the location in which I run into her often and this was her way to solidify keeping in contact with me. (Remember, because of the great advice here; after our date I never once called or texted her so I think she knows I could go either way on her)

I tried to escalate but she was much more guarded this time, probably because we were in her house. Although, once I got her in her bedroom she was much flirtier. Anyway, long story short, here’s the outcome. We did not hook up at all. We left of that she wanted to hang out with me. I told her that if she just wanted to be friends that she would need to be doing sh!t for me then. Meaning, she would play wing woman. She didn’t seem to like that at first, lost her frame a bit. Then she agreed. She didn’t mention her fantom BF really at all the whole time. I also told her that if she did indeed want to come out that she would need to contact me.

My takeaway from the whole ordeal. If I hooked up with this chick last night that would have most likely been the end of it. She is into me, but yes, I am second fiddle. The way I see it though, I got a nice, cool girl make me a very good dinner. I was not home alone drinking and on OK Cupid. This girl is a long play and might be worth it considering because she is not using me (dinners, drinks and not putting out)She is participating in the establishment of something. She has some emotional usury going on but if I am aware of it and just keep her as a spinning plate without much effort I don’t see a reason to next her. I think she is young and is trying to preserve some innocence and is wary of the older guy trying to fvck her even though I think she wants to. She slips up more than I do when she is trying to demonstrate she is not interested. Its almost cute how transparent it can be.

My plan: NC for a couple of weeks. If she contacts me to hang out I will be busy, but I will reschedule with her probably after 2 weeks or so. If she ever plays wingman and **** blocks Ill never speak to her again. If she ****blocks and hooks up with me Ill maybe give her plate another spin.

Lastly, she has friends. I am already making friends here at SS, so maybe I can call this girl to bring her friends out when I meet up with some of you guys! Anybody opposed to hanging out with 21 year olds?! Casino trip anyone?

Thanks again for all your feedback and help. I hope my sharing also helps others. I am preparing now for the smackdown...Go

 

[uadialej]

She'll never be interested if she knows you're just waiting for her, always available, and with no better options. You have to show her you are willing to walk away at any moment and commit to that. Each time you talk to her and do favors for her in the context of 'being friends' it just further solidifies that's all you'll ever be.






How to Get Over Your Ex

 

[salinechow]

Once again, I appreciate all feedback, he who is wise; knows he knows nothing.

However, Pair Plus, because I agree with you, actually, agreed with you about 6 months prior to ever even coming to SoSauve I now look something similar to Channing Tatum body sculpt. Im in the best shape of my life and swim competitively. So we can check that box. Im attractive enough, certainly in the upper percentile as opposed to the lower. Its my leftover beta behavior that makes me less attractive and I know that. Even that I am learning here old habits die hard sometimes.

uadialej: I think sometimes there are mini games to play inside the overall game. I dont really care for this girl. She is practice. She is nice, she is cool, but she is a 6 also. I can walk at anytime, I know that. She has a sense of that but I agree with you it is not strong enough. Yet, until we have something worth staying for we dont have something worth walking away from either. What I am saying is right now no harm no foul. If She was the only girl I was talking to then maybe a walk would be appropriate advice so I didnt get caught up "oneitis" and missing out on other chicks.

As a second interaction I think it was a wash. If there is a third we will have more to go on. If I get friend zoned who cares as long as I have other girls.

I am not being argumentative just opening the doors for more exploration of these topics for other to read and learn from. If I am wrong I am happy to hear that. I have read here though that some feel nexting a girl to quick can also be folly. Everything is situational. Ill tell you this though. I WILL not be doing her any more favors. Even though I did get dinner out of it.

 

[salinechow]

This girl just texted me do I want to get a drink later. Now what? Im thinking just test her back. "I cant, I have plans" Should I sugercoat that anymore? Like "Sorry" Or "Maybe some other time"

 

[TheGambino]

Tell her you'll be there a 6pm and then flake. Doesn't seem like she's interested, but she doesn't mind having you do favors for her.

This is the worst advice Ive ever seen in my life on this forum, im dead dead serious.

You go have fun with her at home, chit chat, kino, make yourself comfortable at her place she will sense that, then you escalate by kino'ing bending over towards her sniffing her neck and go for the shot kiss again. If she denies, try again, if she does that sh1t again act like nothing happened, end the 'date' 10-15 minutes later and forget about her. But it won't happen youre going to rock her day and your day and escalate like a champ at her place.

Don't overthink this, just go, tease, chit chat, escalate you got this. :box:


UPDATE: Don't sugercoat anything, just go pick her up have drinks and escalate omg, if she refuses you be polite and totally forget about any relationship between the 2 of you if she kisses back you can escalate to sex.

UPDATE: I just read you already went for the date. Ok that's the outcome you can't change that, I would forget about her and move on to new chicks you can escalate with from the start that dont know you at all. Get this one back on the agenda only if she invests.

 

[salinechow]

I think she just did invest by asking me out to drinks after 2+ weeks of NC. I actually forgot about her while talking with other girls. I think she might have just broke up with her fantom long distance BF though. So, I just told her" I cant, I have plans in the city" Ill maybe reach out to her in a few weeks and say "how about those drinks" If she is dodgy maybe Ill just rip up her #. See where I am at with it. If she pursues again before that I will definitely touch her naughty spots.

 

[salinechow]

I think she just did invest by asking me out to drinks after 2+ weeks of NC. I actually forgot about her while talking with other girls. I think she might have just broke up with her phantom long distance BF though. So, I just told her" I cant, I have plans in the city" Ill maybe reach out to her in a few weeks and say "how about those drinks" If she is dodgy maybe Ill just rip up her #. See where I am at with it. If she pursues again before that I will definitely touch her naughty spots.

Edit: Sh!t I should have told her "Sorry, my phone has terrible service in the friend zone" that’s funny sh!t

 

[hop On hop Off]

There's a lot NEXT advice. But I beg a differ. You should go, don't lose the opportunity. "Action is better than inaction, rejection is better than regret." -Pook (paraphrased)

You should get to know her and spend more time. But the problem is always getting friend zone when you do it, but I don't think you are at that stage now.

Go out with her with the mindset that you do not allow LJBF. I am interested in you, I am going to KINO you, I am going to flirt you. You may not like me, but that's how I see you. I am not going to surrender to how you want me to act. Of course, she could turn away, but you didn't lose anything, she doesn't want to be your gf anyways.

Your position should be firm and not negotiable. She will hate you for doing this to her, she wants to make you her way. You, on the other hand, should be a hardliner, she will respect you for being a such hard-liner and principled man. It's like at work, people respect because you are principled, you stick to what you said.

Girls do back down and surrender eventually, often times after a fight, after they have tested your water, after they know who you are. I have had girls who I chased, but did not succeed, and gave me the LJBF. I don't tolerate it, they call me narrow mind it, they hate me, they talk trash to my friends. But deep down they are fishing for attention from you when they talk about you. If she really think you are a loser, you will not be in her conversation. She will not even remember you.

I have a lot of ego, they try every way to subdue me, back me down. I don't! They finally give up and become mine!!!

 

[salinechow]

Update

I was hungry and feeling indifferent so I texted the 21 year old this:

"Im hungry. Have dinner with me."
"O. and dont wear pajamas." (reference to the time she invited me over her house)

Her:
Haha. Come over and Ill have dinner hot and served again. And what? I thought my pjs were sexy...what should I wear then?

Me: What time? And, if we are staying in I dont care what you wear but we are drinking wine?

Her: haha.Just kidding. I dont really feel like cooking. Where do you wanna go eat? I can meet you there.

Me:Absolutly not. Part of the enjoyment of an evening out is the car ride and the music. Plus, Im not sure yet. Ill decide when I pick you up.

Her: She called me. Asked me how long she had to get ready and when I could be there. I gave her two options of places to eat. She chose a type and I told her I would be there in 20 min.

Took her out. Nice place. Good food. Place I wanted to go really anyway. Made her pay. After all her friend zone bull**** and her BF talk I wasn’t doting on her anymore. Then when they gave her her receipt I gave her half and left the tip( I know them at this place and didn’t trust that it would be generous enough) I told her when I gave her my half it was because I had wine and she didnt.

She told me it had to be an early night previous in the night. I made no comment. Then, when we were leaving she asked me to show her around. Again, like last time she didnt want to go home right away. I drove her around a bit and listened to my famous great tunes again. She took pictures of my playlist. Then, since she was talking about all the reasons she wishes she was attracted to me for I just played indifferent. Then I started playing her game right back at her. If she just wanted to be friends then I was going to treat her as such. I insulted her more plainly than before. 5 negs to a once in a while compliment. Actually very much how me and my buddies can be sometimes. Then I stared to really lay it on her. Talked about other girls and her being a great wing woman. Asked her advice on other chicks and showed her pictures and texts. (That really go her goat by the way. She couldn’t hide it.) She started sh!t talking the other girls. Skip forward to dropping her off.

I pull up and we are still chatting. Now we are onto bad kissers and sex stuff. She invited me in. She says" I know its late but why dont you come in I have some dishes I have to do" I enter. Not a dish in the sink. Seriously, you cannot make this sh!t up. We talk for a while. Same old story. We talk about our relationships and sex stuff.Now, I know, for fact, I have this girl completely figured out. She wants to wind me up as tight as she can to f^ckin reject me. Now I can have some fun with this. Listen, I am a recovering AFC, but I am pretty perceptive and when I light bulb goes off I can hang with the best of them and beat them at their own game.

We move it to the bedroom. I sit on the floor. She says "You can sit on the bed you know" I refuse. She starts to show me her sexy "new pajamas. I tell her she better not put them on or we will stop being friends immediately. She says " I know" So, I start the Kino" She reciprocates. I get in her bed. We talk about the most intimate possible details of sex. Now I start with the "well this girl and that girl" She mirrors. Then she starts to show me how she likes to be cuddled. Positioning me around and intertwining my legs with hers and all. I still dont bite. I lean in close to kiss her and do not. I talk about things she should try with other guys for a better orgasm. I even show her with her hips. Then I tell her how to grab a guys balls to make them c^m better. Now she starts blushing. Now I have her. I start to talk in the first person. " If its me and you Ill do this." Sh!t like that. She mirrors. She says you are making me feel self conscious." I didnt know that". "I want to try that." I tell her its to bad we are just friends. I tell her we should just be able to show each other. Casual like. She declines. Now, I totally real it in. So she starts talking about sex noises. This is what I sound like. I tell her some of that was good but some not so good.

I tell her I should get going it was supposed to be an early night. She says well you were getting kicked out in 15 mins anyway. I tell her well that wouldn’t have been enough time anyway. She asks me to stay a while longer. I say no. I have to be somewhere. Shocked. She asks me where on a Mon. night. I change the subject. We talk a small bit more and I start my exit. She asks me to text her about going to yoga with me or swimming( I swim semi competitively) or maybe text her this weekend. I tell her ok. But wait... I forgot. Im away ( Im going to the casinos with family for the coming week) And I say this weekend I thought you said you were busy. She seems flabbergasted and remembers she is. I tell her "look, I have enough appointments to try and remember ( I have my own business) and I cant certainly try to remember texting you for yoga. "You text me next time you want to hang out and if I am availiable you can come along." She asks again about this weekend and immediately gets embarrassed because she just asked that. I tell her give me a hug and thanks for coming out tonight. She hugs me. I hold her for a second longer than I should and leave. She says something to me as Im walking down the walk that I cant make out. Makes it easier to ignore. Done and done.

Now fellas. I would love to hear your feedback but for the first time Im not sure I give a damn what you have to say. That is one round that I won unequivocally. This girl loves to mention the age difference. I am 10++ years older than her. But she played with fire when she texted me for drinks on sat. and she got burned. She thinks because she is a halfway sexy Latin chick from South America that she can hang with the big boys. Maybe. But she cannot hang with MEN. Men who dont care for the quick lay. Men who dont care about rejection and can turn the tables. I may be a recovering AFC but I have skill enough to not let some kid get under my skin. And... I have SS to thank for bringing out the best in what was always there but to afraid to game on.

Mark my words. You were not there. You may say I had it all lined up for the taking...but I will tell you. I was there. I played this to perfection. I will be inside this young specimen in the next 6 months. I will report back to you victorious. I just know it. Why? Read on.

For anybody that got this far. For anybody studding this material on SS. Listen to this: Educate yourself with all the feedback and the DJ bible and then APPLY it to your own style. This plate was dead. Why is it back? Because of indifference. I was spinning (and losing) so many other plates I forgot about her. She initiated after 2+ weeks. So...I took initiative. Yeah. I didnt f^ck her. Maybe I could have? But now, now I know I can, I know I will. And the best part... I dont even care if I do or not. That’s why I will.

This forum works. I was not at any point whimpering over my oneitis tonight. I was playing the field. I will go to bed thinking about multiple women tonight instead of saturating my pillow with tears over just one. So victory is within. Yes, I left without sex. Yes, I still feel for my oneitis. But, I feel confident and alive. Not dejected and miserable. No matter what happens in either case. I have a pretty 21 year old who will rub one off to me tonight and judge her BF for not knowing the things I know. And I didnt call or text my oneitis( in a very close encounter with doing so) because I had alternates and plates. I read here once that victory isnt always in bedding a girl but making her think about you when she is with him. I value that. Plus, I also believe, that actual victory is at hand because I just dont give a sh!t. I will call HB 5,6,7,8 on fri to see what they are up to. In the meantime, HB 21 year old is now thinking about me instead of me obsessing over her.

 

[crazyboy]

should have smash right then and there. and six months lets makes 6 weeks if your games sucks but realistically you could probably smash this woman next time you meet her if you escalate properly. But good job on your progress and progress is good progress even if you have to take baby steps. Also try smash when you see her next 6 months the average person lose interest about 3 months.