Need help and advice with an STD scare and depression

[Mikey228]

Maybe I'm on the wrong forum for this exactly, but I've really hit rock bottom. But, hey, I'm Mike, I'm 22 years old. I suffer from depression, anxiety and OCD. Tonight I'm overwhelmed with the thought of contracting an STD and the overall tension of 'post sex'. It's so bad, I wan't to escape it all. So I found this forum and hopefully someone here can help.

I don't know if anyone else out there experiences this, but sometimes after sleeping with a girl; the next day I will fall very depressed for some reason. It's like an emotional attachment and sexual drive culminating into one, big, ugly mess. I can't explain it too well, but you can definitely say its a mixture of strong feelings that were brought on by the initial meetup with that particular person, which later results to sex in that same day. After that, you're left wondering a lot of things. A lot of the time you are also left with regrets and wondering why you still long for someone who you may not desire in the future, if at all.

For my case, I happened to meet this girl through a dating service. We talked for about over a month through text, until finally meeting up. A large foundation of what kept us in touch was that we are both avid smokers (marijuana). For me personally, I find it attractive in a girl who smokes. But, hey, that's just me.

I picked her up the other night and we drove back to my house. We smoked, watched some TV, and finally laid down and after flirting around for a while, it lead to sex. And no, no condom. I've done this before with other women.. but there are some real concerns that I need to state on this particular situation. It was unprotected (yes, of course), I don't know her that well, this is the first time we hung out. Now most of all, the most troubling of all this is, I asked her how many people she slept with. She responded with the phrase "uncomfortable". I asked, why's that? , she said it depends on the situation and that it was hard to explain. I told her how many I had sex with but she still refrained from telling me.

I decided to not try to dig any deeper or make her anymore uncomfortable. After all, you never know what she could mean by that. But of course, the question that has to be raised is "does this mean she's had sex with A LOT of people?" and most of all, "could she have given me an STD?" I've had STD scares in the past, but the fact that I don't even know how many people she's slept with leaves me to wonder. I know the best thing to do would be to get tested, but I believe that requires some time and a doctors referral in my area. All I can do as of this time is make speculations. I haven't had any out of the ordinary symptoms since then, but, man let me tell you its eating away at me. Not only the STD part, but also what I mentioned above with the 'post sex' depression. I'm sorry for this wall of text and if you read it all I really do appreciate it.

 

[Desdinova]

I asked her how many people she slept with.

It's unlikely that you'll ever hear from her again. NEVER ask a woman how many men they've slept with. They will dance around the answer and you'll never really find out, unless she's a virgin. Not only that, you cannot judge your STD risk according to how many men a woman's slept with. You can only judge your risk with how many women YOU sleep with.

Wear a fvcking condom. You're at higher risk of getting some bytch pregnant and screwing yourself with two decades of child support payments than getting an STD.

 

[parkthebus]

If you have anxiety, depression and OCD you need to stop smoking weed, period. If you don't know this already then do a bit of research and youll find plenty of others advocating the same thing. If you have anxiety and OCD its likely you have a serotonin deffieciency. You need to excersize 6 days a week. You need to stop taking drugs that are downers as much as possible (weed, alcohol). You need minimum 8 hours sleep every night.

Don't ask a woman how many men shes slept with. It's unlikely you'll get a truthful answer, you probably won't like the answer unless she's a virgin and it makes you look needy. Do not tell a woman how many women you've slept with either. Knowing how many sexual partners someone has had removes an element of sexual desire. Let yourself think she's a pure little flower and let her think you ****ed all the hot girls you wanted.

If having an STD is such an issue to you then just go and get tested. You can usually book an appointment with a clinic that specifically treats STDs without a referral.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Ironically, when an avid smoker quits, it can cause extreme depression.

fwiw, OP, this forum is full of guys who think they'd be happy if they could just get laid. Then there are unhappy guys who do get laid who think that not having a relationship is the cause of their unhappiness. Whatever you think is your biggest obstacle is likely not the real problem.

 

[dustmuffin]

Crap....I must be getting some kind of disorder. I can't stand to read long posts. The verbal dysentery is something that I can't stand any longer.....

! Depression ,anxiety.....See a therapist and get meds. Use both medicine and verbal therapy.

2 STD Get checked and wrap it up!

3. Start reading the DJ bible. You need too improve your self esteem and confidence. This will help.

That is all I got from the tome. Good luck OP. I too once had verbal dysentery.

When you worry about how many men a girl has been with I always think about how many female mouths my **** has been in.....plenty......**** them and dont worry about it. YOU NEVER ASK HOW MANY MEN THEY HAVE BEEN WITH. NEWS FLASH WOMEN LIE!

 

[FCB]

If you have anxiety, depression and OCD you need to stop smoking weed, period. If you don't know this already then do a bit of research and youll find plenty of others advocating the same thing. If you have anxiety and OCD its likely you have a serotonin deffieciency. You need to excersize 6 days a week. You need to stop taking drugs that are downers as much as possible (weed, alcohol). You need minimum 8 hours sleep every night.

Don't ask a woman how many men shes slept with. It's unlikely you'll get a truthful answer, you probably won't like the answer unless she's a virgin and it makes you look needy. Do not tell a woman how many women you've slept with either. Knowing how many sexual partners someone has had removes an element of sexual desire. Let yourself think she's a pure little flower and let her think you ****ed all the hot girls you wanted.

If having an STD is such an issue to you then just go and get tested. You can usually book an appointment with a clinic that specifically treats STDs without a referral.

Weed can help with Anxiety and OCD. Its has viable medical uses so you are off base here. Weed can be a problem for depression and it obviously doesn't lead to motivation in other areas of life but Anxiety and OCD can be crippling and weed in many cases is a much better option then mainstream medications.

In terms of the STD scare go do some research on transmission rates, its pretty damn difficult to contract HIV. Others aren't as serious and many people have HSV and its still difficult to contract from one sexual encounter as well. That doesn't mean you shouldn't wear a condom and definitely get tested, but you can't control anything that happened the other night so try and avoid letting it haunt you. And don't ask a girl how many people she's slept with, its nothing thats ever going to end well, so don't travel down that road.

 

[parkthebus]

Weed can help with Anxiety and OCD. Its has viable medical uses so you are off base here. Weed can be a problem for depression and it obviously doesn't lead to motivation in other areas of life but Anxiety and OCD can be crippling and weed in many cases is a much better option then mainstream medications.

In terms of the STD scare go do some research on transmission rates, its pretty damn difficult to contract HIV. Others aren't as serious and many people have HSV and its still difficult to contract from one sexual encounter as well. That doesn't mean you shouldn't wear a condom and definitely get tested, but you can't control anything that happened the other night so try and avoid letting it haunt you. And don't ask a girl how many people she's slept with, its nothing thats ever going to end well, so don't travel down that road.

Weed works, when you're high. Rest of the time, downer.

 

[penkitten]

Original poster: if she answered 5 , how would you feel about that?

 

[parkthebus]

Original poster: if she answered 5 , how would you feel about that?

Why 5?

 

[penkitten]

Random number.

 

[penkitten]

I would times it by 3.

That's sort of where i was going with it.

 

[Erniepotts]

This is crazy....

Just get tested.

It only cost like 20 bucks if you have insurance.

 

[aridchimp]

Get tested when it comes to STDs. You either have one or you don't, and knowing can only help. It isn't that embarrassing or hard, just request a referral or whatever to test for STDs. Doctors are very professional about it. It feels awesome getting proof either way, so you can either treat it or move on. Nothing will stop that gnawing anxiety demon better than scientific testing. Most common STDs are not that bad anyway and usually curable.

IV drug use is the worst danger sign in a partner (possible HIV/Hep C). You do NOT want to sleep with someone who is at risk for those viruses. Make sure you know her drug use habits more than her number of sex partners.

The "post-sex depression" thing is normal. You are coming down off of a physical and emotional high and now have a psychological burden. Work on building self-esteem, and otherwise, address the emotions. It will get better with age, though, dude.

 

[grayclif]

If you have anxiety, depression and OCD you need to stop smoking weed, period.

^^^^^^^^^ Listen to this ^^^^^^^^

Stop with the weed bro.