NEED ANSWER ASAP! help plz?

[Bryce556]

alright so talking to girl abit on msn. this conversation comes up, and you can read here for yourself. after that last comment I really did not know what to do and was panicing at that point so i just blocked her... I like talking about these things in person with girls rather then on msn. What should I do now next time I see her wednesday at school? I really like this girl, and this just pisses me off.


Jaimie says:
Do you like me as more than a friend?
bryce says:
now thats not an msn question
bryce says:
ask me again next i see you
bryce says:
i dont like talking about anything serious on msn
Jaimie says:
Well I wanted to, because I'm really not good at talking about it in person
Jaimie says:
can you answer my question?
bryce says:
im sorry but i really cant over here, ill talk to you on wednesday
Jaimie says:
No
Jaimie says:
sorry, but I just wanted to clear it up
Jaimie says:
I'm sorry, but I only see you as a friend, I like someone else.

now usually when somthing like this happens i get really depressed and cant funtion very well for the next few weeks, no this just happened so what occured hasent acually hit me yet, so either i need plan of action or somene to tell me what to do here?

 

[ARrocket]

Well....do you understand what you did wrong? The answers all depend on that....

As for what you should do, just start focusing on other girls. It's gonna hurt, but it's the best way to heal

 

[GaryUranga]

be liek "thats cool... YOU WERE UGLY ANYWAYS :'("

 

[Bryce556]

i think i might have been a bit to "nice guy" like, and may have been a bit to cligey... other then that i need to work on makeing people laugh more. and i dont know what elese i did wrong.

 

[ARrocket]

Well, being a nice guy and being clingy is the quickest path to the friend zone....

 

[SinJester]

Your worrying about what you did wrong, that in itself is wrong

So I'm guessing you liked her? Oneitus? Should have used a c/f respone to that question, but I think it's clear that you were in the frieds zone, ditto ARrocket. But yeah can you give us some more information?

You can't have everyone. You can't make someone like you that just isn't attracted. Contrary to some messages you might find on here there will simply be girls that no matter how good your 'game' is wont like you as more than a friend.

 

[2.0]

Why do you assume that you did something wrong? She's just interested in someone else. Next her. Although you could still stay friends with her. Don't take it personally and assume it means you did something wrong.

 

[Bryce556]

well ive known her all of high school but only really started hanging out in the last few weeks. i just cant seem to have friends that are girls, if they have stuff in common with me and resonably attrative i tend to allways fall for them . One thing about this that annoyed me alot is that she choose to msg me over msn about this, instaed of in person, i absolutly hate it when girls do this, she is a pretty outgoing person so i dout that she would have trouble talking to me in person about it... it just confuses me

 

[SinJester]

When you try to make friends with a girl, is she usually the only girl you are hanging out with at the time?

From Pook's Fifteen Lessons:

Lesson Fourteen

The young man had one problem left. He would be very successful with women, from one night stands, from casual dating, from relationships, and so on. Yet, every now and then, he got that feeling of something BURSTING through his chest like a creature popping out from Alien.

The woman would talk to him, “Blah blah blah.” He felt it inside, a very sweet but gooeish feeling. She would go on, “Blah yappity blah blah” and he felt the sickly warm feeling spread throughout his body. What was happening to him? “Yappity yap blah blah, yapitty, blah yap!” the girl continued as he felt the FEELINGS spread throughout his body, paralyzing him, like a poison. “Yah blah blah yah,” she went on, oblivious as he was collapsing from this sickness.

The next day, he had this OVERWHELIMG urge to send her flowers, chocolate, and bad poetry. It was too much, and he gave in, and saying, “You are my life. I love nothing else so well as you. I will do ANYTHING for you.”

Then she said, “I think we should just be friends…”

Oh, that AFC disease rose up again in him! How does one smash it forever? He smiled, and realized:

Always have a back-up chick!

“But Pook! Perhaps this guy was falling in love!”

“No. It was a False Love. Come and see.”

Pook led the youth inside Every Man’s Heart. Inside the cavernous room, each surrounding wall depicted television screens with a graphic.

“What is this place?”

“Every guy has a passion about different things. On that wall is his ‘car’ passion. We see many screens of different cars, all ones he loves. On that other wall there is his ‘food’ passion. We see screens of all his favorite foods. And if you come along here, you’ll find the Ambition Wall where screens show all the things he wants to do. Now look at the Women Wall.”

“Pook! There is only one picture on it!”

“Yes. Nature has designed us to love in a marriage way when there is only one picture on that wall.”

“I can understand that. But where is the problem?”

“The problem is that he is not married or engaged to her! So he is acting married to her when really they are ‘dating’ or ‘just friends’.”

“Oh dear…”

“Yes. When a guy decides to go dating and dates only ONE chick at a time, only one picture will appear on the wall. When there is only one, he is designed to think of her in a marriage way. So he starts becoming AFC with this girl he just talked to.”

“So say if a guy is socially unskilled and has only one friend that is a girl, only that girl’s picture will appear on the wall? And because of that, he will ‘fall in love’ with his friend?”

“Exactly! If there is only one f*ckbuddy, he will eventually want to ‘date’ the girl, want to become exclusive with her, and turn into a total AFC.”

“But if he has a back-up chick…”

“…then another girl is on the wall as well. He can’t act ‘married’ if there is more than one girl up there. Thus, he stops becoming a ‘latent AFC’.”

“But what if he has his interest in other things? Shouldn’t he date only one girl then?”

“No. Either go for MANY or go for NONE. If you go for ONE you will become an AFC. Most guys are too LAZY or too SCARED to go for multiple girls. So they remain AFCs and forever remain in the vicious cycle.”

Did wonders for me.

This is from my Some Advice For HS thread:

Most people come here with one girl they like. Just one. They think they love her and can't think about anyone else. So sad. You have to realize that you have no claim to this person. Especially if you barely know them, or worse, have barely even talked to them. It is easy to get infatuated but realize that this is just you LUSTING after her body. It isn't love or anything else. It is pure lust.

It has been proved that the human nervous system can't tell the difference of a real experiance from a vividly imagined one. So you know how you IMAGINED yourself on a sate with that hot babe? Your brain thinks it is REAL. This accounts for a lot of infatuation. The moral of the story is not to fantasize about a girl you know. It leads to infatuation. If you must make sure to fantasize about a few girls, not just one. Scrap your obsession with one girl. You can use your imagination to your advantage too.

I've basically overcome oneitus. Sure it pops up but I stop it in its tracks. Good luck trying to get oneitus if you have lots of attractive friends and aren't thinking about any of them when you aren't hanging around them.

Don't worry about her messaging you over MSN, she did that because it's the eay way out, it's a human trait to choose the easiest path, not just a trait the ladies have.

Hope I helped.

 

[collalife]

move on

 

[collalife]

its simple, forget her and move on. theres like 6 million other girls in the world.

 

[In Motion]

its simple, forget her and move on. theres like 6 million other girls in the world.

You are awesome in math.

 

[Bryce556]

Thanks alot for all the advice guys, especially Wolf and SinJester. I had fergotten about that lesson from Pook. It all makes sense now and is clear!

the msn thing was somthing ive tried to get away from, talking to girls on there is harder and you cant allways convey what your trying to say in the right manner and then it is taken the wrong way, goes for guys or girls.

Thanks again