Need advice how repair new relationship that gone bad

[Last Man Standing]

You must be very young!! She opens her legs on the first day that you talk to her and then you have a picnic and buy champagne to celebrate and now you call it a "relationship"!!!

Listen here kid - she is a hor and you are the pimp - get that in your head!!!!! Get your head out of your ass and quit being an emotional buffoon!!!

Wake up!! The Matrix has you!!!

Get your shyt together or die!!!!!!!!

 

[KarmaSutra]

If you knew what you were doing, you would have realized that you WERE the ordinary posessive guy.

Jesus. Look at Des taking this cat to school.

Nothing I can say that he hasn't covered except this:

You're her girlfriend, not her man.

 

[Alpha-A]

I notice that no one have reacted over the fact that she has been lying when saying, "I'm gonna call you tonight", but she didn't. The time when she was saying that we were already haning up the phone, she it wasn't like she needed to say it to hang up.

Ok, we have all lied but that doesn't make her lie more respectable. A bad behavior should be punished. That's at least one social reason that I may disrespect her.

Most of you aren't too interested in this area, thinking I should dump her from my mind. I fully respect that. But now we're trying to figure out, what exactly went wrong, and more importantly how to repair that first attraction.

 

[Alpha-A]

the picnic in the park thing might not have been totally bad (I wouldn't do it myself so early, but you say she liked it). I just hope you didn't spend much money on the wine.

But the best restaurant in town after a ONS? Give me a break, chump. You brag about how many hors you've slept with, but you obviously know very little about how relationships really work. Listen to Desdinova. Pretty much everything he said is right on the mark. You seriously need to suck in your pride and admit that you've got some AFC tendencies. Constantly contradicting everything we post here for advice isn't going to help you with this hor.

And it sounds like you're calling this girl way too much. Just because she slept with you doesn't mean she wants to be in a relationship with you. Calling her up once every week or so (max) would be smart. But you're going way overboard.

Finally, you claim that you have these "super high standards" for your women, yet you're trying to get into relationships with hors who will do ONSs with you after first meeting you. (Like Desdinova said, what makes you think she isn't doing the same every weekend with a new guy?) Your "high standards" aren't stopping you from TOLERATING CRAP from this sorry excuse for a woman. Having high standards doesn't just mean dating good-looking babes. You have to find one that has similar interests and values, who has a high interest level and treats you with RESPECT.

Btw, read the DJ Bible. You may be an above average frustrated chump, but you obviously need some help nonetheless.

First of all, I didn't know it was bragging to give you some background history. Secondly, I'm not contradicting everything you say here. I admit to something and other things I just wanted to clear out. And I think I made my points in previous posts. Not to say that all things you have stated or wrong. I hear and I listen, and appreciate every constructive criticism.

But it's interesting what kind of view people here have on women. If they make a mistake or two they are *****s. Well, well...

I definately called her too much now when we look back. But she have called or sent messages to me, "Can I please come and see you now" and such. So it seemed like we had something intimate going.

And with high-standards I didn't mean only good looks. The fact that we have so much in common made this girl interesting. And you hopefully agree when I say you don't meet that type too often.

Hope I cleared out some things. Thanks for the feedback!

 

[Desdinova]

I notice that no one have reacted over the fact that she has been lying when saying, "I'm gonna call you tonight", but she didn't.

If you actually did have a lot of experience with women, you would know that this is pretty typical. If you want to ensure that you get a date, you have to do all the work: phone her, set the time and date, decide on the activity. However, if a woman's IL is high enough, she WILL call you. But if you need more time to raise her IL, you need to do all the calling and date planning.

Anyone giving me credits for this solution? Besides the ones that believes you can never ever go back to a girl.

You can get back with any girl you like. However, it takes a lot more work to get a woman back than to go out and find a new one. Now, since you seem to think this woman is high quality and that you don't want to lose her based on this, let's see where the quality is:

- She fvcked you before she dated you.
- She doesn't call you
- She doesn't seem "in love" with you
- She's keeping contact with her ex

Now please tell me why this woman is worth pursuing.

 

[Alpha-A]

Desdinova,

I have been with quite a lot of woman that have called me when they said they would. Actually that's most often the case. You think that is sooo unlikely?

When it comes to the 4 points you pointed out. I understand and agree to some extent but,

1. I don't see it as a necessary bad that she fvcked me and then dated me. You mean that all women that do that are hooes? Sure, when I want a real girlfriend I would hope she wasn't jumping to bed easy with any one, but I don't see it as a prerequisite.

2. She doesn't call me? Well, that can mean she is so interested in me so she's playing the game not to risk anything. That's not a necessary bad either, is it? But in this case, I'm with you. She's gone too far, and if things are going to get better she need some punishment.

3. She doesn't seem, and very likely, aren't in love with me at all at the moment. But earlier on I felt she were. Actually during those romantic moments and while sleeping together.

4. She is keeping contact with many of her guy friends. A few days ago she was watching movie with two guys. Sure, she could have just been in a gang-bang with them 1 PM, but I think it's more likely she has male friends.

It's not easy for you to know all these extra things I am adding, and besides, you could still be right that she is worth nothing. But I'll give her the benefit of a doubt for now.

I'm not naive, on the contrary I'm pretty self-critical, or else I wouldn't be here right? But still, I think many of you are too fast and too hard to judge.

I still don't say that you are wrong, I say you could be wrong and I could be right. I would like to get to know the answer to that question.

 

[theunflushables]

I don't think we/they are being to quick to judge at all. You came here for advice remember? Well, here we don't generally pat people on the back and give them a kleenex to wipe away their tears. We're not going to tell you to get back with this girl, none of us will. Because that makes you a slave to her. How can you be a man if she has you tied up on puppet strings? Today is a day of independence, maybe you should use this day to think about and reflect on your personal independece. Do you want to be free or do you want to be tied down by a girl who doesnt even treat you that well?

 

[Interceptor]

Alpha-A,
Buddy, what's happening here is that most of the guys have gone through what you have at some point or another. We've lived it, or seen it.
We now KNOW what not to do, bro. Really.
So what you're seeing here is a guy that despite evidence, that we've seen is looking at , but apparently totally disregarding this evidence.
Look, put plainly, there would be no way in Hell most of the guys here would have done what you did.
An ONS is an ONS. And FB, is an FB. A "good woman" with the same Values as you is one woman to really "look" at, and start ways of seducing her for an LTR, if that is what you want. And there are methods of seduction specifically for Her, and even then, they are still to be put in to practice based on your unique circumstances with this Good Woman.
(And there is NOTHING wrong with treating a Good, kind, deserving woman with the sweetness and affection that only us Masculine men, with true appreciation and experience can offer her. There is some truth to possessing our true nature, our own true Masculine Grace.)
There are certain perspectives we should put on when looking at each woman individually, dude.
You're using the wrong perspective on this chick.
You really are.
You are acknowledging facts, but you're disregarding them and not letting them sink in and use them to navigate these fvcked up waters.

Again, what;s happening is this feeling from us that "WTF is this guy doing?? What was he thinking? Doesn't he know you don't do that sh*t with this type of chick? Why is this not sinking in? Why doesn't he know this already??"

Good luck. Don't get carried away with emotions, and don;t get caught up in believeing she is the "One" or something.
Enjoy it for what it is.
SImple.
Seriously.
Have fun with her. Have great monkey sex with her. Get drunk in the rain with her. But keep yourSELF in check, and keep your perspective, bro.

Keep the proper perspective.

Women can intuit when you don't. That's the truth.

 

[EFFORT]

And you hopefully agree when I say you don't meet that type too often.

Wow so nothing i said went through? Thats too bad

 

[Desdinova]

she need some punishment.

I feel sorry for this poor girl. Some dude she fvcked a couple of weeks ago is going to punish her for not phoning. And just how are you planning to make a punishment effective to a woman who barely knows you? For a "punishment" to be effective, the woman needs to have some sort of respect for you. She hardly has enough respect to call you when she is supposed to.

You're making a lot of excuses for this woman's behavior, and you're making excuses to continue pursuing her.

Since you're only looking for the advice you want to hear (which I refuse to give), I will just wish you well on your quest, whatever it may be.