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need advice for this situation

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dj ben2

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ok so i have been seeing this girl for about a month, we've known each other for few years but we started going out not long ago and everything ws going well, she was pursuing me and i was the prize. unfortunately i got drunk on a few occasions and let it be known to her my feelings too soon, showed a bit of neediness and things have been going downhill. not long ago i got the LJBF speech how she doesnt feel the vibe anymore and i pretty much just said yeah whatever thats cool i dont care.
now in these situations i usually just cut all ties and only talk to them when they make contact and start going out again.
problem is shes coming to bali with me and my family in a week and a half for 2 weeks and doing this wont be possible. plus we're going to be in the same room and bed =O lol question is i do actually still like her and i want to know how i should act while at bali without ruining my chnaces even MORE. i was thinking about completely changing my attitude and acting aloof, being friends with her but not showing any emotion like ive gotten over her already
i usually learn from my mistakes and dont ask for advice but this situation is quite the wierd one
 
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iliketennis

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be polite but don't talk to her much until the trip. then have some drinks
 
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jophil28

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dj ben2 said:
..she was pursuing me and i was the prize. unfortunately i got drunk on a few occasions and let it be known to her my feelings too soon, showed a bit of neediness and things have been going downhill. not long ago i got the LJBF speech how she doesnt feel the vibe anymore and i pretty much just said yeah whatever thats cool i dont care.
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Who is that smug idiot on this board who preaches ," Alcohol = sex "
 
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dj ben2

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jophil28 said:
Who is that smug idiot on this board who preaches ," Alcohol = sex "
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alcohol giveth but also taketh away =D alcohol has got me laid many a time =D

im planning on just playing it cool and not showing any emotion towards her and if nothing changes in the 2 weeks we're there just dropping the idea of getting back with her. anyone else have any input?
 
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dj ben2

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because i liked her and she is a really fun person who i wouldnt mind staying friends with anyway.... like i said we have known and been friends for quite some time. plus why are you quizzing me on somthing i havent even asked about?
 
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Warrior74

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dj ben2 said:
because i liked her and she is a really fun person who i wouldnt mind staying friends with anyway.... like i said we have known and been friends for quite some time. plus why are you quizzing me on somthing i havent even asked about?
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What? You are kidding me right? I know you are 19, but seriously, you need to grow a pair and tell her straight up, you booked this trip for you guys as a couple and it would just be awkward if she came now. Then invite someone else if you paid for it all. Trust me, she'll gladly take blue balling you, chumping you out and hopefully meeting some other guy on a vacation, its not awkward for her, but she knows it will be for you. Ruining your chances more? I see no chances to ruin.

I'm going to say it. You are skating on the edge of oneitis. Taking a chic who dumped you on a vacation with your family pushes you right over the edge.

Do what you normally do and make no exceptions. Treat her like you would any other girl who wasn't interested. Because she just treated you like she would any other guy she wasn't interested in. You doing anything more is chump behavior and everyone knows it. Time to be a man. Good luck son.
 
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dj ben2

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Warrior74 said:
What? You are kidding me right? I know you are 19, but seriously, you need to grow a pair and tell her straight up, you booked this trip for you guys as a couple and it would just be awkward if she came now. Then invite someone else if you paid for it all. Trust me, she'll gladly take blue balling you, chumping you out and hopefully meeting some other guy on a vacation, its not awkward for her, but she knows it will be for you. Ruining your chances more? I see no chances to ruin.

I'm going to say it. You are skating on the edge of oneitis. Taking a chic who dumped you on a vacation with your family pushes you right over the edge.

Do what you normally do and make no exceptions. Treat her like you would any other girl who wasn't interested. Because she just treated you like she would any other guy she wasn't interested in. You doing anything more is chump behavior and everyone knows it. Time to be a man. Good luck son.
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i usually would but circumstances alter exceptions. she paid for her own ticket. went halves in all accomodation and gets on with my mum who would not let me do something like that.... ive already stopped the texting and calling and she has already started calling me rather than the other way around and yes i have already started to treat her like a friend again and nothing more
 
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Joe Stud

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Benny, these guys are right... especially the warrior (rep).

I know its hard... and humiliating. But it will be better for you, and you will later feel more pride.... if you tell her you dont want her to come with you. Bring someone else... even a buddy (wingman).

ps... if she was really an honorable person, she would politely back out anyway.

edit to post: as I posted this, your above post showed up, so i see you are stuck. so I guess you just treat her like a cousin, and enjoy your vacation. that includes gaming chicks.
 

Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.

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dj ben2

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so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest so i suppose ill just have to give up that idea oh well ill still have heaps of fun
 
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omega05

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you're still looking for some way to hopefully re-ignite her interest and we are telling you to leave her alone
 
V

vatoloco

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dj ben2 said:
so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest
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Dude, you've been LJBF'd. You're out.
 
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JustLurk

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dj ben2 said:
so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest so i suppose ill just have to give up that idea oh well ill still have heaps of fun
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It's not impossible, but not likely.
Unless you actually want her as a friend I'd say go for it anyway and have it be either the friend**** ends or the relationship begins.

But you could keep her around as a girl 0 friend.
 
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