My thoughts on cold approaching

[crowolf]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches. Here are my recent thoughts on it:

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time. The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low. At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

At this point I am probably doing it for the dopamine. I see no real results. While it's true that I may often aim higher than I should or I may not choose the perfect demographics matching women, it still seems like it's a numbers game. And it's also kind of fucc'd up how you are not allowed to make mistakes or appear unconfident during your initial meeting phase. Dare to show the slightest sign that your "rank" is lower than the girl, and you lose her in a second. If she is good looking, chances are she already has so many options. And, after all, you are just a random guy from the street.

I have to admit that I appreciate the act of choosing a random stranger woman in the real world and create an opportunity for a connection, but this seems to happen quite rarely. Especially if you have not gotten any signals, she is hurrying up to get somewhere, and you appear out of nowhere to introduce yourself. If I were a woman, this would probably annoy me. Not to mention that If it's not the right moment, she is not ovulating or whatever else that might be going on in her life that might put her in the mood to just straight up reject you. And as you can guess, this never feels good.

One of the main issues with cold approaching is that the whole frame from the get-go is that you are chasing her. And this is stupid. Almost never works. Look at the guys who get women. They are preselected and chosen. They don't waste time chasing. I do understand that as men it's our role to take the initiative and move things forward but I am not sure if this is the way to go.

So, who is this thing for?

- If you wanna conquer your fear of approaching and meeting random women, this is for you. Try it out at least.
- If you wanna lose weight walking around all day looking for women to chase, there you go!
- If you have too much free time, somewhat high libido, and the ambition/stubbornness to meet woman irl.

I don't know If I will continue going out with the idea of approaching. I feel that I should focus on my goals instead, and only use my "approaching skills" under more convenient settings or situations. I am done with this for at least a week from now. And I hope life doesn't pull out the funny tricks and trigger me to do it again (but this time with a plot twist of course).

One last observation from today. I noticed 2 girls that I was interested in approaching. One was a ~7 with a camera and a backpack - she looked like an interesting person. The other one was 8+ a little goth type of a girl that probably has daddy issues. Guess what I chose? Right. The second one. I chased her for maybe 6 minutes, as she was walking fast. I hesitated to approach because 1) I wanted to see her face better and 2) I foresaw how this would go: "I am in a rush, sorry, bye". Later on she entered a KFC, and I waited there to approach. But she was kind of grumpy looking, didn't send me signals, and I didn't go for it. But imagine what kind of an investment this is from my part - to pursue her for that long, and not even meet her at the end.

At this point I am seeing how this is the devil's work. Lust and all of that. Had I chosen the other girl, my whole life directory might have been different. And you probably wouldn't be reading this right now. Anyway...

 

[SW15]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches.....I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time.

In general, approaching strangers in any non-bar venue (commonly known as daygame) is not efficient at all. It's quite inefficient when the approaches are done without receiving an IOI first.

It doesn't matter which non-bar venue you select, though some are worse than others.

Roosh called street game the most difficult venue hands down back in 2012.

How To Pick Up Girls On The Street

Based on my experiences with street type game, I agree.

In the 10+ years in my current city, I've done more of my street type game on designated recreational walking paths and occasionally in city parks. The walking paths are tough for game. Most women aren't receptive because they are moving and wearing headphones/earbuds. There is some natural stopping points on each of the trails where I game that are ideal for approaching but it's still tough.

Between dog walkers and earbuds, there's a reason why outdoor and street game is so difficult.

Your story have been primarily about random outdoor and street type game. Game indoors in retail venues/gyms isn't that much better.

 

[DreamAgain]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches. Here are my recent thoughts on it:

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time. The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low. At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

At this point I am probably doing it for the dopamine. I see no real results. While it's true that I may often aim higher than I should or I may not choose the perfect demographics matching women, it still seems like it's a numbers game. And it's also kind of fucc'd up how you are not allowed to make mistakes or appear unconfident during your initial meeting phase. Dare to show the slightest sign that your "rank" is lower than the girl, and you lose her in a second. If she is good looking, chances are she already has so many options. And, after all, you are just a random guy from the street.

I have to admit that I appreciate the act of choosing a random stranger woman in the real world and create an opportunity for a connection, but this seems to happen quite rarely. Especially if you have not gotten any signals, she is hurrying up to get somewhere, and you appear out of nowhere to introduce yourself. If I were a woman, this would probably annoy me. Not to mention that If it's not the right moment, she is not ovulating or whatever else that might be going on in her life that might put her in the mood to just straight up reject you. And as you can guess, this never feels good.

One of the main issues with cold approaching is that the whole frame from the get-go is that you are chasing her. And this is stupid. Almost never works. Look at the guys who get women. They are preselected and chosen. They don't waste time chasing. I do understand that as men it's our role to take the initiative and move things forward but I am not sure if this is the way to go.

So, who is this thing for?

- If you wanna conquer your fear of approaching and meeting random women, this is for you. Try it out at least.
- If you wanna lose weight walking around all day looking for women to chase, there you go!
- If you have too much free time, somewhat high libido, and the ambition/stubbornness to meet woman irl.

I don't know If I will continue going out with the idea of approaching. I feel that I should focus on my goals instead, and only use my "approaching skills" under more convenient settings or situations. I am done with this for at least a week from now. And I hope life doesn't pull out the funny tricks and trigger me to do it again (but this time with a plot twist of course).

One last observation from today. I noticed 2 girls that I was interested in approaching. One was a ~7 with a camera and a backpack - she looked like an interesting person. The other one was 8+ a little goth type of a girl that probably has daddy issues. Guess what I chose? Right. The second one. I chased her for maybe 6 minutes, as she was walking fast. I hesitated to approach because 1) I wanted to see her face better and 2) I foresaw how this would go: "I am in a rush, sorry, bye". Later on she entered a KFC, and I waited there to approach. But she was kind of grumpy looking, didn't send me signals, and I didn't go for it. But imagine what kind of an investment this is from my part - to pursue her for that long, and not even meet her at the end.

At this point I am seeing how this is the devil's work. Lust and all of that. Had I chosen the other girl, my whole life directory might have been different. And you probably wouldn't be reading this right now. Anyway...

You are pretty on the money with this analysis, but what do you intend to do instead. Nightlife? Swipe Apps? Random Instagram DM-ing?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time. The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low. At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

Before you start disqualifying an approach: who are you, what age are you, where are you doing the approach, is it only this approach or are other approaches also failing, et cetera.
If people have similar circumstances to you, they might agree.

I don't agree with you at all, but my experiences are based on who I am, my age, location and success with other approaches.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches. Here are my recent thoughts on it:

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time.

The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low.

Depends on how you define "low"...and what your expectations were.

In a perfect world, we'd all like to be 100/100.

But I think that realistically, 30/100 is a more obtainable goal.

Low would be 15-20/100.

At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

Perhaps you should lose the charm, then.

If you are gonna get flaked on anyway, might as well get flaked on while exerting less time and effort.

At this point I am probably doing it for the dopamine. I see no real results. While it's true that I may often aim higher than I should or I may not choose the perfect demographics matching women, it still seems like it's a numbers game.

It is precisely that; a numbers game.

And it's also kind of fucc'd up how you are not allowed to make mistakes or appear unconfident during your initial meeting phase. Dare to show the slightest sign that your "rank" is lower than the girl, and you lose her in a second.

That is why you have to prepare, before you approach.

Have a game plan.

If she is good looking, chances are she already has so many options. And, after all, you are just a random guy from the street.

Every woman has options.

If you are attractive to her, being a random guy from the street doesn't matter.

If you are walking down the street and a random $100 bill slaps you in the face with the wind...you are gonna take the money, right?

Random or not.

You are to be that $100 bill to her...not in terms of money, but in terms of something she finds enticing.

I have to admit that I appreciate the act of choosing a random stranger woman in the real world and create an opportunity for a connection, but this seems to happen quite rarely.

As long as it is 30/100... it is those non rare 30 that counts.

Especially if you have not gotten any signals

Speaking of rare, getting choosing signals from women; that is what is rare.

Especially with day game.

, she is hurrying up to get somewhere, and you appear out of nowhere to introduce yourself.

I mean, then you find the ones that are not hurrying to get somewhere.

If I were a woman, this would probably annoy me.

If you are in a hurry and an attractive woman tries to holla at you, will you get annoyed?

Probably not.

So, it works both ways.

Not to mention that If it's not the right moment, she is not ovulating or whatever else that might be going on in her life that might put her in the mood to just straight up reject you. And as you can guess, this never feels good.

When you play football, getting tackled doesn't feel good, but that shouldn't stop you from running the ball.

One of the main issues with cold approaching is that the whole frame from the get-go is that you are chasing her.

When something is being chased, it doesn't want to be pursued.

You don't know if she desires to be pursued until you...pursue.

Once it is determined that what you are pursuing doesn't want to be pursued, and you continue to pursue, then it becomes a chase.

You guys need to learn the difference instead of these feeble attempts at putting cold approach in the worse light possible.

And this is stupid. Almost never works. Look at the guys who get women. They are preselected and chosen. They don't waste time chasing.

Sry, but this is nonsense.

Guys aren't getting chosen like that, so stop not.. ESPECIALLY with day game.

And even if they are, they still would have to be attracted to the women who are choosing them.

So, both of those ducks would have to be in a row... thus, not an efficient process.

I do understand that as men it's our role to take the initiative and move things forward but I am not sure if this is the way to go.

So, who is this thing for?

- If you wanna conquer your fear of approaching and meeting random women, this is for you. Try it out at least.

- If you wanna lose weight walking around all day looking for women to chase, there you go!

Or, you can gain weight by living a sedentary life swiping your life away on dating apps..still chasing women.

- If you have too much free time, somewhat high libido, and the ambition/stubbornness to meet woman irl.

Even if you don't have free time, you make time.

 

[ManlyMan]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches. Here are my recent thoughts on it:

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time. The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low. At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

At this point I am probably doing it for the dopamine. I see no real results. While it's true that I may often aim higher than I should or I may not choose the perfect demographics matching women, it still seems like it's a numbers game. And it's also kind of fucc'd up how you are not allowed to make mistakes or appear unconfident during your initial meeting phase. Dare to show the slightest sign that your "rank" is lower than the girl, and you lose her in a second. If she is good looking, chances are she already has so many options. And, after all, you are just a random guy from the street.

I have to admit that I appreciate the act of choosing a random stranger woman in the real world and create an opportunity for a connection, but this seems to happen quite rarely. Especially if you have not gotten any signals, she is hurrying up to get somewhere, and you appear out of nowhere to introduce yourself. If I were a woman, this would probably annoy me. Not to mention that If it's not the right moment, she is not ovulating or whatever else that might be going on in her life that might put her in the mood to just straight up reject you. And as you can guess, this never feels good.

One of the main issues with cold approaching is that the whole frame from the get-go is that you are chasing her. And this is stupid. Almost never works. Look at the guys who get women. They are preselected and chosen. They don't waste time chasing. I do understand that as men it's our role to take the initiative and move things forward but I am not sure if this is the way to go.

So, who is this thing for?

- If you wanna conquer your fear of approaching and meeting random women, this is for you. Try it out at least.
- If you wanna lose weight walking around all day looking for women to chase, there you go!
- If you have too much free time, somewhat high libido, and the ambition/stubbornness to meet woman irl.

I don't know If I will continue going out with the idea of approaching. I feel that I should focus on my goals instead, and only use my "approaching skills" under more convenient settings or situations. I am done with this for at least a week from now. And I hope life doesn't pull out the funny tricks and trigger me to do it again (but this time with a plot twist of course).

One last observation from today. I noticed 2 girls that I was interested in approaching. One was a ~7 with a camera and a backpack - she looked like an interesting person. The other one was 8+ a little goth type of a girl that probably has daddy issues. Guess what I chose? Right. The second one. I chased her for maybe 6 minutes, as she was walking fast. I hesitated to approach because 1) I wanted to see her face better and 2) I foresaw how this would go: "I am in a rush, sorry, bye". Later on she entered a KFC, and I waited there to approach. But she was kind of grumpy looking, didn't send me signals, and I didn't go for it. But imagine what kind of an investment this is from my part - to pursue her for that long, and not even meet her at the end.

At this point I am seeing how this is the devil's work. Lust and all of that. Had I chosen the other girl, my whole life directory might have been different. And you probably wouldn't be reading this right now. Anyway...

80 approaches is not enough.

If you were to get good at basketball would you shoot 80 shots than give up and assume their is no point in it.

Approaching must be a habit and something you are passionate about.

 

[kzar_kzar]

Throughout the last year I have made around 80 day game cold approaches. Here are my recent thoughts on it:

I am starting to feel that this is mostly a waste of time. The ROI (return of investment) is extremely low. At least for me, as a somewhat "cool guy" that can charm women enough to get their numbers and then get flaked on (lol, how ridiculous this sounds). And of course my goal is to get to know them (and more..), not simply "score" the number close. This was only in the beginning when my ego was too involved with it.

At this point I am probably doing it for the dopamine. I see no real results. While it's true that I may often aim higher than I should or I may not choose the perfect demographics matching women, it still seems like it's a numbers game. And it's also kind of fucc'd up how you are not allowed to make mistakes or appear unconfident during your initial meeting phase. Dare to show the slightest sign that your "rank" is lower than the girl, and you lose her in a second. If she is good looking, chances are she already has so many options. And, after all, you are just a random guy from the street.

I have to admit that I appreciate the act of choosing a random stranger woman in the real world and create an opportunity for a connection, but this seems to happen quite rarely. Especially if you have not gotten any signals, she is hurrying up to get somewhere, and you appear out of nowhere to introduce yourself. If I were a woman, this would probably annoy me. Not to mention that If it's not the right moment, she is not ovulating or whatever else that might be going on in her life that might put her in the mood to just straight up reject you. And as you can guess, this never feels good.

One of the main issues with cold approaching is that the whole frame from the get-go is that you are chasing her. And this is stupid. Almost never works. Look at the guys who get women. They are preselected and chosen. They don't waste time chasing. I do understand that as men it's our role to take the initiative and move things forward but I am not sure if this is the way to go.

So, who is this thing for?

- If you wanna conquer your fear of approaching and meeting random women, this is for you. Try it out at least.
- If you wanna lose weight walking around all day looking for women to chase, there you go!
- If you have too much free time, somewhat high libido, and the ambition/stubbornness to meet woman irl.

I don't know If I will continue going out with the idea of approaching. I feel that I should focus on my goals instead, and only use my "approaching skills" under more convenient settings or situations. I am done with this for at least a week from now. And I hope life doesn't pull out the funny tricks and trigger me to do it again (but this time with a plot twist of course).

One last observation from today. I noticed 2 girls that I was interested in approaching. One was a ~7 with a camera and a backpack - she looked like an interesting person. The other one was 8+ a little goth type of a girl that probably has daddy issues. Guess what I chose? Right. The second one. I chased her for maybe 6 minutes, as she was walking fast. I hesitated to approach because 1) I wanted to see her face better and 2) I foresaw how this would go: "I am in a rush, sorry, bye". Later on she entered a KFC, and I waited there to approach. But she was kind of grumpy looking, didn't send me signals, and I didn't go for it. But imagine what kind of an investment this is from my part - to pursue her for that long, and not even meet her at the end.

At this point I am seeing how this is the devil's work. Lust and all of that. Had I chosen the other girl, my whole life directory might have been different. And you probably wouldn't be reading this right now. Anyway...

Dude you don’t wait for approach wtf! And how do you get someone from back!!
damn,

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

80 approaches in a year isn't even one a day, gtfo and do way more, like I've done 40 in a day, get it

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

80 approaches in a year isn't even one a day, gtfo and do way more, like I've done 40 in a day, get it

Yeah, that would be like approaching one woman per day for 2 and a half months straight..and not approaching any more for the rest of the year.



But then again, 80 in a year is still a lot more than most these muhfukaz on here have done.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

But then again, 80 in a year is still a lot more than most these muhfukaz on here have done.

Absolutely. I haven't done any cold approaches this year. Or last year. Or the year before that.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

In general, approaching strangers in any non-bar venue (commonly known as daygame) is not efficient at all. It's quite inefficient when the approaches are done without receiving an IOI first.

You are my homie, but I beg to differ.

1. It is efficient for me with day game.

2. It is efficient without receiving an IOI.

It doesn't matter which non-bar venue you select, though some are worse than others.

Roosh called street game the most difficult venue hands down back in 2012.

How To Pick Up Girls On The Street

Based on my experiences with street type game, I agree.

I disagree with most of the shiit he said.

Again, it depends on how you define success.

If you set a realistic standard for success, then you should be able to hit your goals if you increase your sexual market value (body game, hit the gym).

In the 10+ years in my current city, I've done more of my street type game on designated recreational walking paths and occasionally in city parks. The walking paths are tough for game. Most women aren't receptive because they are moving and wearing headphones/earbuds. There is some natural stopping points on each of the trails where I game that are ideal for approaching but it's still tough.

Between dog walkers and earbuds, there's a reason why outdoor and street game is so difficult.

Yeah, the earbud thing.

It can be tough and even intimidating.

But you gotta do it..or at least try.

Tell yourself something like..

"For every 3 women that I find attractive with earbuds, I will approach the 3rd one".

Set the standard, and do it.

I've been doing gym game off/on lately, and big titties bouncing on a treadmill is something I cannot overlook.

I am approaching, earbuds or not.

Your story have been primarily about random outdoor and street type game. Game indoors in retail venues/gyms isn't that much better.

I agree. Same shiit.

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

Absolutely. I haven't done any cold approaches this year. Or last year. Or the year before that.

Good for you.