Hey guys, I know this forum is not for depressed people to whine about their miserable life, but I just need some help, cause I just dunno what to do next, where to stat, where to go, what’s next??? Just need some advice...
I’m 18 year-old guy. The last few years of my life have been really pontless. While others, my friends that I had, partied around, lived their life fully, then I sat home at my computer, played some addictive games like Counter Strike, Runescape etc. I haven’t played any of them for a year though. I feel like I have missed my teens. While all others have something to remember, something good from youth, then my youth is really boring. I have one best friend and a few friends, but I usually don’t have much to do. Recently I have thought a lot on suicide. But I won't do it. Just thought on it. Everything would be much easier then,This summer has also been just sitting at home in my computer or just watching movies. I go outside when I have some people to go with. I hate doing things solo, even riding the bus to traiing I always meet my training mates in there before training.
During my 18 years I have never even kissed a girl. I have had no girlfriends, not even a girl friend. I am not very sociable person. I love talking to people, but it is one of my weakest sides. I lack of social skills. At school I am considered smart as other, but actually I am just stupid, because I cannot understand things whcih are really neended in life, like people. Without them life would be pointless. I may understand well some amth, or whatever. I don’t like these things, I just get the idea usually faster than many others. Naturally.
You guys probably think I have done nothing to change my life. But for the last half yaear I have been skimming through different seduction forums. RSDNation, ParagonProject, this and other. Read the DJ Bible, Blueprint, >New Breed other. Watched RSD DVDs Done a lot. But to be honest I have learnt nothing from this. I understand this, but it just does not attach to me. I really try, but when I am outside then then I just can’t practice these things reality. I try, approach, but nothing ever comes out of it. Usually girls just get bored round me. As I said before my conversational skills aren’t good. Also my sense of humour is lowww. I just don’t have any ideas. You say, talk whatever comes into head. Don’t think inside your head. I try, I do’t, but still everything is kinda dry, like fake. Then the self comes throguh and that’s it. I get blowned out.
I probably wouldn’t even try to change my life, but last year has been really horrible. I just fell in love, so-called oneitis. That girl was just perfect. And I just blew everything up with her. I probably didn’t even had a chance, because she was „too good“ for me then. Usually at high school it is not that unpopular guys date with more popular girls. I don’t whether she is popular or not, at first, she seemed like an average girl. I actually had a chance to try anything, try to seduce her, try anything, but I ****ed things up. She is basically laughing over me at the moment. She is on so wrong perception of me. This summer it even got worse as one fo my „friends“ who know about this story, just decided to make things even worse for me and at the moment they are just laughing over me on MSN together about the BS that he is telling her. That sucks. Some rumour about me are spreading around and I have no idea what it is.
During the last year, I have gone outside a lot, every week I usually want to go to club, but haven’t scored yet. As I told before, girls just suaully get bored. I am not that interesting person. Also my looks is not good. I a like obsessed with my nose, it is just very different.Don’t even know how to describe this. Also my headshape is quite weird, like it is bigger than the head of others, hard to explain:
My body looks fine. Soon I will even have sixpack, just the matter of time. My sense of style is not very good. I just don’t know how to choose clothes. I may be to stores for hours, trying on things, wanting to buy anything, but I just can’t choose, because I don’t know which things like to me. When I am down to a club I often feel as a little kid in there. My height is 180 cm. It is quite tall, average. But when I am at a club, I see that I am usually one of the shortest in there. Like a kid around men. Also I am shorter than most of people of my age. I used to wear glasses, last year at school also, now I have contact lenses, but eyyes look a bit weird. If anyone knows how to make them look normal, advice is welcome.
One of my passions is sports. I love playing team games, despite I suck at these. My worst thing is positioning. I just don’t know where to go. I work hard, run a lot, like an animal, but just completely pointlessely, not knowing on what to do. I love playing soccer, but I just suck at this. I have a good shot, but I am really slow. And low on tehnique. Have been playing for 8 years.
During my last weeks my parents have aslo started annoying me. Mother is telling I’m 18, need to do housework. Need to earn the money which I get from them. I don’t know the value of money, she loves to say. Getting a job is almost impossible. More than 10% of our nation are unemployed.
That’s my story. Long, but thanks for reading, if you read it. I have basically no idea on what should I do. My last year of school is coming. I want it to be great. But there are so many ****ing BS in my life, that I can’t even concentrate on imporivng myself. I just don’t imporve, even if I try. Or it takes me much longer than most people. Dunno which is the way. I have read the Tolle, but did not understand anything about it. It was quite interesting, but did not get anything from this. I don’t know what should I do with that oneitis. She is like really hot. And good natured. Was just perfect. Probably just an illusion, she is not that good, but to be honest, I just don’t care about it. I like her. & I want her.
During the last days, I haven’t slept properly. Just can’t sleep. All these things on my life. Just a pine in the ass. Hate that thing. No sleep. Yesterday got to sleep 5 AM and got up 10 AM. Just can’t sleep more. Anyways, I’ll end this post now or it gets way too long. Please give your opinion on what should I do. Or any suggestions. Thanks
I’m 18 year-old guy. The last few years of my life have been really pontless. While others, my friends that I had, partied around, lived their life fully, then I sat home at my computer, played some addictive games like Counter Strike, Runescape etc. I haven’t played any of them for a year though. I feel like I have missed my teens. While all others have something to remember, something good from youth, then my youth is really boring. I have one best friend and a few friends, but I usually don’t have much to do. Recently I have thought a lot on suicide. But I won't do it. Just thought on it. Everything would be much easier then,This summer has also been just sitting at home in my computer or just watching movies. I go outside when I have some people to go with. I hate doing things solo, even riding the bus to traiing I always meet my training mates in there before training.
During my 18 years I have never even kissed a girl. I have had no girlfriends, not even a girl friend. I am not very sociable person. I love talking to people, but it is one of my weakest sides. I lack of social skills. At school I am considered smart as other, but actually I am just stupid, because I cannot understand things whcih are really neended in life, like people. Without them life would be pointless. I may understand well some amth, or whatever. I don’t like these things, I just get the idea usually faster than many others. Naturally.
You guys probably think I have done nothing to change my life. But for the last half yaear I have been skimming through different seduction forums. RSDNation, ParagonProject, this and other. Read the DJ Bible, Blueprint, >New Breed other. Watched RSD DVDs Done a lot. But to be honest I have learnt nothing from this. I understand this, but it just does not attach to me. I really try, but when I am outside then then I just can’t practice these things reality. I try, approach, but nothing ever comes out of it. Usually girls just get bored round me. As I said before my conversational skills aren’t good. Also my sense of humour is lowww. I just don’t have any ideas. You say, talk whatever comes into head. Don’t think inside your head. I try, I do’t, but still everything is kinda dry, like fake. Then the self comes throguh and that’s it. I get blowned out.
I probably wouldn’t even try to change my life, but last year has been really horrible. I just fell in love, so-called oneitis. That girl was just perfect. And I just blew everything up with her. I probably didn’t even had a chance, because she was „too good“ for me then. Usually at high school it is not that unpopular guys date with more popular girls. I don’t whether she is popular or not, at first, she seemed like an average girl. I actually had a chance to try anything, try to seduce her, try anything, but I ****ed things up. She is basically laughing over me at the moment. She is on so wrong perception of me. This summer it even got worse as one fo my „friends“ who know about this story, just decided to make things even worse for me and at the moment they are just laughing over me on MSN together about the BS that he is telling her. That sucks. Some rumour about me are spreading around and I have no idea what it is.
During the last year, I have gone outside a lot, every week I usually want to go to club, but haven’t scored yet. As I told before, girls just suaully get bored. I am not that interesting person. Also my looks is not good. I a like obsessed with my nose, it is just very different.Don’t even know how to describe this. Also my headshape is quite weird, like it is bigger than the head of others, hard to explain:
My body looks fine. Soon I will even have sixpack, just the matter of time. My sense of style is not very good. I just don’t know how to choose clothes. I may be to stores for hours, trying on things, wanting to buy anything, but I just can’t choose, because I don’t know which things like to me. When I am down to a club I often feel as a little kid in there. My height is 180 cm. It is quite tall, average. But when I am at a club, I see that I am usually one of the shortest in there. Like a kid around men. Also I am shorter than most of people of my age. I used to wear glasses, last year at school also, now I have contact lenses, but eyyes look a bit weird. If anyone knows how to make them look normal, advice is welcome.
One of my passions is sports. I love playing team games, despite I suck at these. My worst thing is positioning. I just don’t know where to go. I work hard, run a lot, like an animal, but just completely pointlessely, not knowing on what to do. I love playing soccer, but I just suck at this. I have a good shot, but I am really slow. And low on tehnique. Have been playing for 8 years.
During my last weeks my parents have aslo started annoying me. Mother is telling I’m 18, need to do housework. Need to earn the money which I get from them. I don’t know the value of money, she loves to say. Getting a job is almost impossible. More than 10% of our nation are unemployed.
That’s my story. Long, but thanks for reading, if you read it. I have basically no idea on what should I do. My last year of school is coming. I want it to be great. But there are so many ****ing BS in my life, that I can’t even concentrate on imporivng myself. I just don’t imporve, even if I try. Or it takes me much longer than most people. Dunno which is the way. I have read the Tolle, but did not understand anything about it. It was quite interesting, but did not get anything from this. I don’t know what should I do with that oneitis. She is like really hot. And good natured. Was just perfect. Probably just an illusion, she is not that good, but to be honest, I just don’t care about it. I like her. & I want her.
During the last days, I haven’t slept properly. Just can’t sleep. All these things on my life. Just a pine in the ass. Hate that thing. No sleep. Yesterday got to sleep 5 AM and got up 10 AM. Just can’t sleep more. Anyways, I’ll end this post now or it gets way too long. Please give your opinion on what should I do. Or any suggestions. Thanks