My Situations: Am I On A Downward Spiral?

[dustmuffin]

As far as your family goes it is up to you how to deal with them. For example, my dad is very manipulative. Controlling, sneaky, a lier, cheat, and uses abusive mind games. He terrorized me for years. I finally devided that i dont need his crap. After i visit him it feels like i have been beaten up and drained emotionally. So i dont see him very often. It works for me. Just because someone is a relative doesn't give them the right to abuse you....you stand up for yourself. Ask them to change. If they don't then leave.

 

[Desdinova]

3) The biggest issue you are not facing is your childhood. Your parents and your childhood are responsible for about 80% of what got you where you are today. The sooner you address this, the sooner you can take full control over your life. Best to do some self-reflection on this.

This is a really good point. Shortly after I found this site in 2001, I started addressing the issues I had with my upbringing and my family. I started reading books on topics related to the cult I was raised in, and I read a book called "Toxic Parents". All of this helped me come to terms with all the fvcked up 5hit that took place, and let me know all the problematic areas that I had to address.

But god damn it, every single fvcking chick is on bullshyt. Either the fvcking chick has major financial issues, kids already, weight issues, fickle fvcking personality issues, just GLARING shyt that I can't build a god damn thing with any of these people. And I keep pulling these "same" types of chicks, I just wanted one (just ONE) fvcking chick with some god damn sense and I can't find one. That's why I concluded on getting the vasectomy, it's because I don't want to stop fvcking the chicks I get, but I can't get any of them pregnant!

This is the tragedy of today's women... They're NOT suitable to procreate with. The options you have are:

1) Procreate with one, make one child, and risk (or anticipate) that you will end up paying child support, raising this child part time, or possibly even full time if you choose an absolute piece of 5hit to be the mother.

2) Get a surrogate mother and raise the child on your own

3) Adopt a child

One thing you need to consider is how old you want to be when having children at home. I personally didn't want to be retired and still raising children and/or having them at home. I will be 46 when my kid is 18. I like the thought of that because he should be on his own by the time I retire. If you have no problem with waiting for the right woman and potentially having children at home when you retire, then opt out of the vasectomy. I honestly wanted to have more children, but I came to the realization that I wasn't going to have any more because my (then) wife was a piece of 5hit mother, and I knew I didn't want to go through the whole meet, date, LTR, wait years and get to know her, and then get her pregnant. That's at least 5-10 years of time needed for that to happen. I didn't want to be in my mid-40s having another child.

If you do get the vasectomy, you have some other options:

1) Store your sperm in case that elusive ideal woman comes along

2) Find a woman who doesn't want children (they do exist)

3) Find a woman who has a child and help her raise it

4) Adopt

5) There's a procedure where you get get the sperm sucked out of your ba11s

6) Get your vasectomy reversed

Look at all the post-vasectomy options! If the woman genuinely wanted to procreate with me after I got a vasectomy, she would help pay for either the reversal or to get my ba11 juice removed. That would show me how dedicated she is.

Every supposed close guy friend I had has stabbed me in the back over dumb shyt, a lot of them it's been related to women.

This is why I make acquaintances. They're usually temporary in life, but enjoyable for the time they're around. I have a revolving door around them. Occasionally, I'll make a long term friend out of it. However, you NEED to find yourself a social activity to make these temporary friends. Try to find something that consists of both men and women. ACCEPT the fact that most friendships are only temporary. If you need something, go to meetup.com and find something there that interests you.

 

[LiveFreeX]

A friend and I were talking about selling Scientific tools. If you have a science degree you can sell for science companies. He told me the BASE SALARY is 95k + 5% of all sales.

 

[NSX-R]

Just one thing.
" As you think, you shall become " .

I don't think I have to be more specific.

 

[Tenacity]

Guys,

Sorry that I haven't updated this thread in awhile. Here's some updates:

Career: This is still a work in progress but I'm getting some "direction" lined out on this.

Fitness: I started taking Digestive Advantage and I noticed that my eating plan was very high on protein, but low on carbs. I made some adjustments and I'm going to see how it goes.

Women/Dating/Children: I still don't know what to do with this. One part of me is still wants the "dream" of the quality girl with 2.0 children and 1.0 house, with 1.0 pet (the blue pill side you could say). The other part of me is the red pill side, which looks at what's going on around me in relation to women's behavior, the behavior of women I've dated, how they will FLIP on you, how they outright fvcking lie to you, and my other side says I will be a complete and utter retard to do any type of legal relationship with them such as marriage or making kids. I'm completely torn between the two dominant thought processes (blue and red) and all I can do as a result is default to the decision of......."just wait a little longer" in relation to the vasectomy. It's like, having a person close to you in a coma and the doctors saying they probably AREN'T going to come out of it but they MIGHT come out of it. So instead of pulling the plug and just letting them and the situation "rest", you decide to leave them in a coma state for "just a little longer" because you are secretly hoping inside that it turns around.

Family Situation: I think this is just going to be what it is. Some families are closer than others, some aren't.

Close Friends Situation: This is something that I think can get better as I meet more cooler, honest and ethical people going forward.

 

[Tictac]

 

[Tenacity]

Tictac,

That image is a good summary, it's just that I'm trying to figure out what is worth fighting for and what's not?

Obviously things like my Career and Fitness are things I'm going to continue to fight for such as making the required modifications, changes, moves, etc. to keep them efficient.

I don't know if making kids is worth fighting for, it just seems very loud and clear to me that if I get one of these women pregnant they are going to put my life through hell...and the hell just isn't worth it, especially considering the fact I might not even be able to see my damn kid(s). She might decide to pack up and move across the country.

I was just programmed so HEAVILY with blue pill shyt coming up and with the over-abundance of red pill and true analysis that I have done on the significant low quality state of women and dating relations.......I'm just "stuck" and don't know what decision to make. I honestly just get very ANGRY when I sit and think about it long enough, because it just doesn't have to be like this man. The women DO NOT have to be doing this dumb shyt man. They don't.

 

[Warrior74]

Old school popping in. Focus on your career first. If you read my post history you know I hit rock bottom, unemployed for two years no money on the verge of eviction for months, had to start over from scratch at mid 30s. That was a bad position, you are not in a bad position and you have options.

Health, can't help you there. See a doctor/dietican maybe? I dunno m8.

Women. I have a kid and an ex. I'm done. I'm focusing on being financially secure. I have a plate who comes by once a week. I'm good with that. Maybe one more plate would be nice. But the thing is I just don't have the time for relationship anyway. I'm too busy trying to chase my dreams.

If you have family you love, call them once a week and just listen. Do it for yourself, not for them, so you can look back and say, I spoke to the person I love. The problem may be you as well as them. I have family issues and I know it comes from both sides, not just them and not just me.

Friends. I can't help you there either. Most of my friends have spread across the country and I have only 2 friends here...neither of which are into anything I'm into...our interests diverged years ago. My father is 78, he knows a lot of people and is friendly with a lot of people but has very few people he calls friend. I remember being younger and my parents having tons of friends. I think it's something that comes with age. You need other people less for emotional fulfillment in your life if you are living life right.

Good luck.

 

[MatureDJ]

But at the end of the day, I'm starting to see nothing but a sales career laid out in front of me. The hard part is that I'm trying very hard in my spare time to apply for all these different jobs and network with people here in the city. So far, I've taken 3 "Directors" at several different government agencies here in NYC out to coffee. It's always the same old story, "I don't have any open positions in my department/agency/etc."

More or less, with the exception of health care careers (for now) - and engineering (but only for half of a career, as the typical engineer becomes "obsolete" after age 40) - the only "career" out there is sales, in which there is a nasty & brutish struggle to be the salesman getting the deal, and one either makes quota or is thrown out, to be replaced by another schlub.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I think I'm currently going through what I guess, might be defined as a "storm" of life. Just coming to terms with everything and realizing this.

- Career: My current sales position structure is dying off, due to changes within the industry, marketing costs, etc. I have been looking to branch off into W-2 positions or starting up another sales office, or doing both. I have no idea what other sales office to start up profitably, and the W-2 positions haven't been going well as I have been having a hard time with the interviews. My career counselor said my resume looks great and I interview great (during mock interviews), but I'm not getting any offers back from Employers despite in my opinion doing a great job at the interview. Why is that? I have no clue. To keep things in perspective, I have an MBA, almost 10 years of commercial finance/sales experience, and three different bachelor's degrees. I'm 32.

It takes a lot of work to find a job in todays market. A numbers game just like the dating game and your hit rate may be lower. Flood all the positions in your surrounding area for hopes of half a dozen interviews. Also consider contract work. You will be fine if you put in the work.

- Fitness: My 6 pack finally came in this year, but my diet has been causing significant stomach problems. I'm bloating, having stomach pains, etc., all throughout the day and it's extremely uncomfortable. When I was eating fast food everyday, I had no such issues.

I've never gone from no six pack to a permenant six pack, but I'm sure it takes a few years for the body to accept it as it's new norm. So fluids and stuff will be stored differently than before. At least you have a six pack to complain about. Find out which foods are causing the bloating and pains.

- Women/Dating/Children: Even though my Vasectomy is rescheduled for December 18th, I still don't want to do it (psychologically/emotionally) even though I believe I have logically come to the right conclusion. It just feels like I'm giving up on everything. My entire point and dream in fixing up myself from a romantic standpoint, wasn't to just spin plates the rest of my life. I was looking to find one decent girl and start a family with that one girl, create two kids. I feel as though I'm being forced, pushed, etc. into this situation of doing the vasectomy.

Don't give up on love. Start laying down more with women who are on your level that you could see being your partner. That might be your new game to identify circles in which they exist and position yourself so that you are a great option.

- Family Situation: Never hear from this people, unless it's random off conversations about literally nothing. Nobody checks up, nobody even asks where I stay, nobody comes to visit, nobody calls, basically I'm not even fvcking alive. And I have done nothing to these people.

This what they do sometimes. You said you where one of the most motivated of your peers and family members. They end up bad talking the ones doing "different", appreciate your peace. We check up on you here, and when you find your queen she will have your back. I think the most important things in the new person is that they help you out, they are loyal, and they are somewhat attractive to you, also your sex is good enough where you don't need to get it elsewhere.

- Close Friend(s) Situation: I truly have none. Associates are all over, mainly people I have done business with in some way, but I don't have what you would call "a close group of guy friends".

I'm starting to think that I'm about to go on a downward spiral. That in some ways I have peaked, and now I'm going right back down to the piece of shyt gutter where I came from.

Appreciate the negative but focus on the positive. You have some negative thought loops holding you down, but so do I.

My biggest critics from this site have made mention that I come off very negative, I don't know how else to come off when my life has been pretty much a significant challenge in every category.

I don't know what I'm going to do, but I wanted to share this here because it might be other guys going through the same shyt, and starting this discussion might provide some assistance for them while it provides assistance for me as well.

You might be overanalyzing some things, when you are supposed to be enjoying, I know I was and it was killing everything...