My situation - advice needed !

[Tkman]

Hey,

So this chick at work has been checking me out ... giving me eye contact, smiling, standing beside me in the elevator, etc. (Strong signals)

After couple of days, I introduced myself to her with small talk and asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime. She was like "I don't give out my phone number" and "we should know each other more at work" ... something along these line, I don't recall exactly. I was like "that's cool, I will see you around."

I moved on ... if I see her sometimes I say "Hi" and she responds back positively. While, other times I just ignore her.

The awkward thing is this chick doesn't stop giving me eye contact and I'm sensing she's hoping that I talk to her / ask her out again ?!?!

I spoke to my friend and he said maybe she likes to take it slow ....

What do you think ? Does she like the attention ? Is she shy ?

 

[DMEDFISIK]

I agree. Choose self-respect.

My experiences aligns greatly with "antidump". Do a search on threads created by him and you will find good information on subjects similar to this one.

Basically, if she's interested, she will make it beyond obvious, way more than just "looking you in the eye". She had her chance to say yes and she said no. She knows you're interested so just leave it at that.

I know others on here will say "go for it again", but honestly, do you really want to be "that guy at work" who is borderline harassing her?

When it comes to these decisions of choosing between chasing a girl who has nothing higher than warm interest or choosing self-respect, always choose self-respect. There are plenty of other women out there.

 

[Die Hard]

She doesn't give out her phone number?!?! Then to hell with her and her IOI's !!

Seriously, don't degrade yourself by chasing after her after this. In my mind, this is how the game works:

1. girl does her part by sending IOI's and "invites" guy to approach her.
2. guy does his part by making the approach and goes for escalation.
3. girl responds postive to the escalation.

If she doesn't respond positive to the escalation, then I'm through with her. It basically means she rejected me, so bye bye to her. I don't give her anymore attention after that, she must now EARN my attention all over again. Only if she does so sufficiently, will I give her another chance and make a second attempt but if she "rejects" me again, it's two strikes and she's out, PERIOD. I'm the prize and she could've had me but she blew her chances, her loss...

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

"I don't give out my phone number"

"So, it's pretty much Match.com and Facebook for your dates then?"

 

[sodbuster]

Women love ATTENTION and will do what they must to get it. doesn't want to date, but still wants the attention

 

[Die Hard]

Right... Be good to me and I'll give you attention!

You give your dog a snack when it perfoms a trick. If it refuses to do the trick and just looks at you with 'puppy eyes', hoping you will fall for that, you give nothing.

There was this girl I met in the club on NYE. We started talking, I grabbed her and started dancing with her. I pulled her closer and she wouldn't resist, we started dirty dancing, rubbing against each other, she put her head on my shoulder and I could hear how she was starting to breathe heavier. But then she would start talking to me again, in a very rational, distant, no-fun way. Like "what do you do for a living?" and I would respond, have a short convo with her and then start focussing on kino again. She'd respond to the kino but everytime things would escalate towards a certain point, she'd start talking again, like she wouldn't allow herself to be swept away with her desires. Eventually I was fed up with it, looked her in the eyes and went for the kiss. She looked away, turning her cheek towards me.

I just let go of her and started talking to my pal, who was talking to her girlfriends. She looked at me like "WTF?! Why did you just let go of me?" but I totally ignored her. Later on, she and her girlfriends came to me and my pal to say goodbye and waved at us. I looked at all her girlfriends and waved back at them, but I totally ignored her.

Last Saturday, she was in the club again. Her girlfriend (same one who was with her on NYE) started talking to my pal, like "Hey, it's you again! How are you? Blah, blah, blah" She was staring at me with 'puppy eyes', like "Please approach me?" I don't think so! In my mind I was like "I tried to kiss you for fukk's sake, you know I want you! So if you want anything from me, all you have to do is start chatting with me and show interest. Which is an easy thing to do, since your girlfriend is already talking to my pal!" But she didn't, she just stared at me with those 'puppy eyes', hoping that was enough. :nono: Obviously, doggy didn't get it's snack...

 

[PokerStar]

Right... Be good to me and I'll give you attention!

You give your dog a snack when it perfoms a trick. If it refuses to do the trick and just looks at you with 'puppy eyes', hoping you will fall for that, you give nothing.

There was this girl I met in the club on NYE. We started talking, I grabbed her and started dancing with her. I pulled her closer and she wouldn't resist, we started dirty dancing, rubbing against each other, she put her head on my shoulder and I could hear how she was starting to breathe heavier. But then she would start talking to me again, in a very rational, distant, no-fun way. Like "what do you do for a living?" and I would respond, have a short convo with her and then start focussing on kino again. She'd respond to the kino but everytime things would escalate towards a certain point, she'd start talking again, like she wouldn't allow herself to be swept away with her desires. Eventually I was fed up with it, looked her in the eyes and went for the kiss. She looked away, turning her cheek towards me.

I just let go of her and started talking to my pal, who was talking to her girlfriends. She looked at me like "WTF?! Why did you just let go of me?" but I totally ignored her. Later on, she and her girlfriends came to me and my pal to say goodbye and waved at us. I looked at all her girlfriends and waved back at them, but I totally ignored her.

Last Saturday, she was in the club again. Her girlfriend (same one who was with her on NYE) started talking to my pal, like "Hey, it's you again! How are you? Blah, blah, blah" She was staring at me with 'puppy eyes', like "Please approach me?" I don't think so! In my mind I was like "I tried to kiss you for fukk's sake, you know I want you! So if you want anything from me, all you have to do is start chatting with me and show interest. Which is an easy thing to do, since your girlfriend is already talking to my pal!" But she didn't, she just stared at me with those 'puppy eyes', hoping that was enough. :nono: Obviously, doggy didn't get it's snack...

these chicks...man.

sometimes they dont recognize a good thing, even if you bent them over and put it in their butt.

 

[squirrels]

When a girl says, "I don't give out my phone number..." you may as well stick "...to you." on the end of it. :/

 

[jophil28]

She was like "I don't give out my phone number" and "we should know each other more at work" ...

Womanspeek translation -

" I really don't want to see you outside of work. I like things the way they are. I am having fun enticing you but I do not want this to progress any further.
You are my fun and entertainment here and I hope that you continue to be snowed by my insincerity... keep looking my way, chump."

 

[Slickster]

Hey,

So this chick at work....

That's all I had to read.

Never mess around with chicks at work.

It goes one of 3 ways:

1. You hit it off and now you work with your girlfriend.
2. You hit it off initially but things go sour and now you work with your ex.
3. Things suck from the get go and she rejects you or you reject her. Now whenever you see her at work things are awkward.

Don't go there. Find someone else.

 

[Tkman]

When it comes to these decisions of choosing between chasing a girl who has nothing higher than warm interest or choosing self-respect, always choose self-respect. There are plenty of other women out there.

Self-respect

If she doesn't respond positive to the escalation, then I'm through with her. It basically means she rejected me, so bye bye to her. I don't give her anymore attention after that, she must now EARN my attention all over again. Only if she does so sufficiently, will I give her another chance and make a second attempt but if she "rejects" me again, it's two strikes and she's out, PERIOD. I'm the prize and she could've had me but she blew her chances, her loss...

I'm actually not going to ask her out again ... her loss. That would just provide her with "satisfaction." I like the way she keeps trying to make eye-contact while I ignore her ...

You give your dog a snack when it perfoms a trick. If it refuses to do the trick and just looks at you with 'puppy eyes', hoping you will fall for that, you give nothing.

Not falling for it again ...

Looking for attention, don't give her what she wants, just give her less, hang out with other chicks at work and see how she responds.

I have for the last like 2 months, she literally stares sometimes and for some "unknown phenomena" when she doesn't see me on a particular day that we work the same shift, she's walks around looking around in the office.

I know she's looking for me.

" I really don't want to see you outside of work. I like things the way they are. I am having fun enticing you but I do not want this to progress any further. You are my fun and entertainment here and I hope that you continue to be snowed by my insincerity... keep looking my way, chump."

lol so true !

Thanks for advice everyone ... I have been actually ignoring her majority of the time, but obviously I say "Hi" when we come face to face and keep it at that. Sometimes, I literally ignore her even when its face to face.

 

[Pair A Dice]

Hey,

So this chick at work has been checking me out ... giving me eye contact, smiling, standing beside me in the elevator, etc. (Strong signals)

After couple of days, I introduced myself to her with small talk and asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime. She was like "I don't give out my phone number" and "we should know each other more at work" ... something along these line, I don't recall exactly. I was like "that's cool, I will see you around."

I moved on ... if I see her sometimes I say "Hi" and she responds back positively. While, other times I just ignore her.

The awkward thing is this chick doesn't stop giving me eye contact and I'm sensing she's hoping that I talk to her / ask her out again ?!?!

I spoke to my friend and he said maybe she likes to take it slow ....

What do you think ? Does she like the attention ? Is she shy ?

She, like all women, crave attention. Also, as the old adage goes, 'Don't Sh!t where you eat.' There is a gorgeous woman at my office a little older than me that is single and while I fantasize about doing nasty things to her, there is no way in hell I'd act on it unless I prepared to move on to a new job.

Plus, those aren't really STRONG signals.

How big is an elevator? You can't really get around standing next to someone in there, especially if there are people inside of it. Now, if she ran to catch the elevator every time you got in, that would be a different story.

Smiling? Making eye contact? Those seem like friendly things to do unless she's mimicking a blow job with her hands and mouth at the same time. Then, that's a different story.

 

[Tkman]

UPDATE:

So I have taken your advice my fellow DJ's and started to totally ignore this chick. I may sometimes say "Hi" once from every 5 times I see her. I flirt and talk with other chicks right in-front of her while totally ignoring her.

I see it in her eyes that her interest level jumped through the roof ... I have became mysterious, challenge, and unpredictable. She changed her office desk (where she normally sits) to be near me ... She's probably used to guys chasing her, well the tables have turned she's chasing me now.

I'm gonna continue spinning other plates and see where this one ends.

There are probably 5 other guys chasing her, but noooooooo she wants the guy who is not showing any more interest in her (women logic) ....

 

[Pierce]

attention-wh0re