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My problem.. I need support/help

NotaNewbie

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 1, 2007
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I have a huge problem that is a big obstacle for me to get females. I compare myself with other guys too much. Always thinking stuff like he has more money or he has a car, he goes out partying everyday.. etc etc. I could cold approach and stuff and I could talk really well with females and needless to say handsome, but my confidence drops so bad when i find out a girl that im working on hangs out in the same circle as the guys that has the money and cars. I start thinking stuff like if she stays with me now she may like me, but when she get to know me she'll find out i dont have money, a car, or do i party everyday and i dont live the same fun life style she does. Also this is the reason why i dont go clubbing because i feel like im not as "cool" as those guys at the club. The fews times that i went, i stuck by my friend and watch him hit the dance floor when i sit by the bar watching everything
 

JDA70

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2007
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So you think your not cool or as good
as them because you don't have cars and money?

You don't need all that to be cool.
It's about your attitude.

So what if she gets to know you and finds out your not
like the guys in the circle that have the cars and money.
If she leaves you then good. She just saved you time better
spent with some other girl that's not a golddigger or
whatever you want to call her.


Ever heard of the 3 second rule?
When you see a girl you are attracted to
you got 3 seconds to go up to her and meet her.
If you wait any longer then stuff will start popping up
in your mind like" I don't have a car and she'll find out and won't like me".

Anyways... what is it you think you need to do to change all this?
 

WC2

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 29, 2006
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Don't think that most the guys on this forum don't have the same problem. After all, this is a self-improvement website, so 99% of the users on here either

1. Need improvement

or

2. Needed improvement and have improved, and thus have chosen to give advice (the smaller majority)

You need to fight on two fronts here.

First of all you aren't confident in your lifestyle and your success. However, you know that you can achieve all these things if you put your mind to it. By knowing you can do this (convincing yourself), you will drive yourself to do it. Whether it's being successful with women, money, people, etc. If you build up enough drive to do these things, you WILL achieve them. The people who are NOT successful are always the ones building these challenges up to be IMPOSSIBLE, while all the meanwhile they are well within mine and your reach.

Second of all, you need to stop worrying about all these expectations when dealing with women and others. What you are not now, you cannot control. What you will be in the future, you can control. Tell people you have expectations for yourself. Tell them that you have big things in your sights for the future. Confirm to yourself that you are in the process of becoming something bigger. Just because you don't have material objects going for you now, doesn't mean you don't have the mental drive for all these things.

Have you been out to the clubs lately? Most the guys picking up hot women DON'T have a solid base. They may act like they do, but really you know they are most likely putting on an act.

You don't need to put on an act. Instead of acting, you are projecting yourself to what you want to and WILL be.

My friends always ask me when I go out, "Why do you act such a big role when you are still a college student living in a 2 bedroom apartment?"

My answer to this is.. Your expectations of your self eventually mold you into what you are. The self-fulfilling prophecy. If you can't imagine yourself as something bigger, then there is no way in hell you can be something bigger. As long as you are working towards this goal, acting the part is not a crime. It's a starting point.

By your post I can tell you want to be something bigger. Start prepping yourself for the part and working your ass off in the process. Like I said, it's a 2 headed front.

As far as the women go, you don't need cars and money to attract them. Be your own man, make your own decisions, and flirt with women. I promise you that you will have no problems laying women if you stick to these rules.
 
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