My Passion For Women Is GONE

[TheGambino]

I can't get enough of women.

 

[TheGambino]

You're correct Bro. I've noticed my journey has been the following:

- Age 16 to 21: No structure, thrown out into the world, completely lost, completely trying to figure out just what in the hell is going on.

- Age 22 to 24: Focused on finding myself, which included a brief period of being homeless but that homeless period was a required step of literally hitting rock bottom....to then start exploding to the top.

- Age 25 to 27: I've found myself, found my career and zoned in on it. Created a retirement plan and contributing to it. Finished all (or most) required college/schooling. Dating life exploded with more dates, a.ss, etc. than ever before.

- Age 28 to Current: Finances continue to grow strongly and everything in life has a solid foundation. Focused on putting the final "touches" on major long term decisions such as making kids, getting married, more career decisions, etc.

So it's like you start out confused, chaotic, and on an adventure........then once you DISCOVER your path, now it's all about sustainability and just learning to LOVE the life that you have, even if the life you have isn't completely 100% every, single, thing you dreamed of.

Listen, I have a lot to be thankful for. I do realize I come off a bit aggressive and pissed off on this forum, I think it's honestly just the way the TEXT comes across on the screen. If we all jumped on a Conference Call, I think you guys would see a lot of the things I say in a different light.

Respect.

 

[BeExcellent]

Got it, but to be honest, those really aren't black women dude lol. I'm talking African American women. The actual Africans who come to this country, honestly, don't even like American black people lol.



I completely agree. My episodes have gotten a lot better this year. I've learned to just accept the stuff I went through growing up and get over it. I'm no longer mad at my Mother, or mad at my Father, or mad at women. I'm not mad at anybody anymore.

I'm focused on completing the remaining career and life goals I have, as well as, making it into Retirement. There are in fact things of this world I'm still fighting to change, but I'm just no longer trying to fight the entire world or change the world.

From a financial production standpoint, 2017 has been the biggest year of my career thus far, and 2018 is looking like it will break my 2017 record.

As much as you and I scrap around here I have to say your views have come to a place of better equilibrium just in the two years I've been hanging around here. And it is not because we necessarily agree either. You used to get seriously off the hook, and now you have matured and although you remain passionate (no problem there) you are no longer unhinged and you are able to have an actual discourse/discussion with folks who disagree with you on the merits. That's HUGE. It means your message is not getting lost in all the volatility any more. If you look at the trajectory of your professional pursuits you'll see an interesting correlation. As your anger has subsided you have enjoyed greater success financially and you also have a better understanding of the social dynamics around you. Those two things are related. Those things are deeply internal and people pick up that energy when they interact with you.

You are in my mind one of the most honest posters here. You put your life on display, you stand up and take the tomatoes, and you are not afraid of anybody. I respect that a great deal about you and I think it reflects who you are and who you are continuing to become. Keep embracing the process @Tenacity and you never know what might happen. You really never know.

Cheers

 

[Tenacity]

As much as you and I scrap around here I have to say your views have come to a place of better equilibrium just in the two years I've been hanging around here. And it is not because we necessarily agree either. You used to get seriously off the hook, and now you have matured and although you remain passionate (no problem there) you are no longer unhinged and you are able to have an actual discourse/discussion with folks who disagree with you on the merits. That's HUGE. It means your message is not getting lost in all the volatility any more. If you look at the trajectory of your professional pursuits you'll see an interesting correlation. As your anger has subsided you have enjoyed greater success financially and you also have a better understanding of the social dynamics around you. Those two things are related. Those things are deeply internal and people pick up that energy when they interact with you.

You are in my mind one of the most honest posters here. You put your life on display, you stand up and take the tomatoes, and you are not afraid of anybody. I respect that a great deal about you and I think it reflects who you are and who you are continuing to become. Keep embracing the process @Tenacity and you never know what might happen. You really never know.

Cheers

Thanks boo

And yes, going forward (if I'm still on this site), I'm going to stop bickering with folks. I think having a good, balanced, debate is great though. Our Marriage Debate was excellent in my opinion. But the bickering isn't productive.

This is actually going to be on my Objective/Goal List for 2018. It's the objective/goal to stop bickering with people in general (I bicker with folks at work sometimes too), as well as, stop trying to fight battles that I can't win and don't even have control to win.

I mean, just me sitting up at night worrying, depressed, and angry over something my Father did for example, isn't productive whatsoever. I have no control over what decisions he made.

@BeExcellent I just hope I didn't say anything to you that made you feel bad in someway. I get a little bit AGGRESSIVE in debates, but I don't feel as though you are a bad person or inefficient person. Your business acumen is very solid.

Damn, I wish I could find one of these Tyquesha chicks who had your business acumen lol. It's like trying to find a chick with a BIG BOOTY with BIG INTELLIGENCE, is kind of like trying to find BIG FOOT

 

[resilient]

Keep growing @Tenacity. I agree with BE, you've come a long way these last few years. I recognize the passion you have in the debates, so you're message still comes through.

 

[BeExcellent]

No harm no foul @Tenacity. It was/is a great debate and one worth having. Thank you for your kind words.

And yes, going forward (if I'm still on this site), I'm going to stop bickering with folks. I think having a good, balanced, debate is great though. Our Marriage Debate was excellent in my opinion. But the bickering isn't productive.

This is actually going to be on my Objective/Goal List for 2018. It's the objective/goal to stop bickering with people in general (I bicker with folks at work sometimes too), as well as, stop trying to fight battles that I can't win and don't even have control to win.

I mean, just me sitting up at night worrying, depressed, and angry over something my Father did for example, isn't productive whatsoever. I have no control over what decisions he made.

You do the above my friend and you are GOING PLACES. I mean you're already going places, but you will exponentially increase the speed at which you travel by doing the above.

 

[fastlife]

@Tenacity At the risk of sounding like I’m psychoanalyzing you (bear with me for a second), do you think it’s possible that you’re still attached to a mental paradigm that was necessary but no longer suited to your current circumstances. Being homeless is something that you never really forget—to climb out of that require a degree of—tenacity—and the mentality that it’s literally you against the world. And while you’ve achieved the nessary external success, do you think you’ve been able to internalize that success? Or in some ways do you feel like you’re still looking for struggles to pit yourself against, since you aren’t able to trust where you came from?

Aspects of my own upbringing were pretty rough—and I needed certain mentalities to get through that & I felt a degree of superiority & antagonism to those who ‘hadn’t been what I’ve been through.’ But at a certain point, I began achieving a degree of financial success that I felt super uncomfortable—like I was betraying the very identity that had enabled me to get where I was. I can’t say I exactly self-sabotaged, but eventually things came crashing down and I felt a tremendous amount of relief. Like, OK, this is where I belong, while at the same time realizing how fvcked up that mentality was.

Who’s to say we aren’t entitled to enjoy our successes just because we struggled to get them? Who’s to say we can’t eventually relax? Who’s to say we can’t have fun? Who’s to say we can’t eventually stop being the underdog?

 

[guru1000]

I had never given on you Tenacity. It wasn't my place to change you. You had to come upon that realization on your own, in your own time, and through your own experience ... if ever. All I could do is plant a seed, and hope that seed would blossom by its own volition. Genuine desire to change cannot be prompted or negotiated by the outside; it must originate in itself.

Some people spend entire lifetimes and die without that seed growing. I've met many. I'm glad to see you are not one of them.

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

A mellow Tenacity? Did you smoke a blunt today? WTF?

Is the sky still blue?

-Augustus-

 

[Tenacity]

@Tenacity At the risk of sounding like I’m psychoanalyzing you (bear with me for a second), do you think it’s possible that you’re still attached to a mental paradigm that was necessary but no longer suited to your current circumstances. Being homeless is something that you never really forget—to climb out of that require a degree of—tenacity—and the mentality that it’s literally you against the world. And while you’ve achieved the nessary external success, do you think you’ve been able to internalize that success? Or in some ways do you feel like you’re still looking for struggles to pit yourself against, since you aren’t able to trust where you came from?

Aspects of my own upbringing were pretty rough—and I needed certain mentalities to get through that & I felt a degree of superiority & antagonism to those who ‘hadn’t been what I’ve been through.’ But at a certain point, I began achieving a degree of financial success that I felt super uncomfortable—like I was betraying the very identity that had enabled me to get where I was. I can’t say I exactly self-sabotaged, but eventually things came crashing down and I felt a tremendous amount of relief. Like, OK, this is where I belong, while at the same time realizing how fvcked up that mentality was.

Who’s to say we aren’t entitled to enjoy our successes just because we struggled to get them? Who’s to say we can’t eventually relax? Who’s to say we can’t have fun? Who’s to say we can’t eventually stop being the underdog?

I think this analysis is on point. I do feel as though I'm living the tale of TWO lives.

First Life: My life from age 24 and prior

Second Life: My life from age 25 to now

The first life is full of rejection, abandonment, isolation, women HATING me, being broke, being roasted, being unattractive, being confused about the world, etc.

The second life is full of MONEY, good looks, having a 6 pack, driving chromed out sport cars, having tons of dates/a.ss, having people look up to me, having major influence in my industry, having clear direction/vision, being attractive, etc.

I keep feeling like the Second Life I'm living right now is a dream and I'm going to wake up any minute now, still 23, and still in Hell.

To be honest, there is a part of me that's a little bit apprehensive to kick my feet up.........smell the roses....and say "I've made it" because again, there's this fear in the back of my mind that the First Life could come BACK, thus, it's like I'm always working, running, strategizing, and risk managing stuff because I don't want to go back to the First Life.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I've lost ALL passion for to the point of where my DYCK isn't even getting hard over them anymore.

Funny how the big head rules the small head 100% of the time. If you're not into the woman or have issues with her, at least for me, no amount of Viagra will make a difference, haha.I've been so bored and over girlfriends before that I've had to remember porn scenes to complete the task.

 

[marmel75]

Maybe instead of looking at a woman as a transaction and having a list of things you need like you are going to buy a car or make a stock trade, you should look at them as a person and realize that no matter how many things they "check" off your list, there is probably a better than average chance that you would be a lot happier with a woman who might not have one thing that is "on your list". I mean I think you are going about this all wrong. You aren't a robot, bro. Like what are you going through a 35 point quality inspection and flagging them for a defect to send back to the manaufacturer or something?

When you narrow your focus to the point that you are narrowing it, it becomes more and more difficult to find what you are looking for instead of broadening your scope. And I'm willing to bet if you met the right person you'd be willing to ignore some of those "requirements" on your list. It's like these chicks that have these crazy "requirements" for these guys, end up getting exactly what they wanted and then realize that isn't really what's important to them and end up with a guy that probably is missing quite a few of them but they are genuinely more happy with him than with their "perfect guy".

People aren't transactions or robots or built to fit "lists". You are going about this all wrong and as such I think you are going to struggle until you drastically change your thought process on this. Just my two cents from a guy that doesn't use lists. Except in code.

 

[sazc]

In a way, it's the same thing as looking for a unicorn

 

[Red Legg]

My passion for women is NOT gone at all.As long as the woman I am with SUBMITS to me sexually and otherwise I have no problems,If she gets out
of line she is verbally warned first,if she persists then the paddle may have to be used.

 

[zekko]

And yes, going forward (if I'm still on this site), I'm going to stop bickering with folks. I think having a good, balanced, debate is great though. Our Marriage Debate was excellent in my opinion. But the bickering isn't productive.

This is actually going to be on my Objective/Goal List for 2018. It's the objective/goal to stop bickering with people in general (I bicker with folks at work sometimes too), as well as, stop trying to fight battles that I can't win and don't even have control to win.

I mean, just me sitting up at night worrying, depressed, and angry over something my Father did for example, isn't productive whatsoever. I have no control over what decisions he made.

I used to have a problem with negative thoughts. It wasn't all my fault because I had a friend who was also very pessimistic. But I came to a point where I realized that it simply wasn't doing me any good, and might have even been holding me back. There isn't a situation you can enter where positive thinking won't serve you better than negative thinking. As you said, it simply wasn't productive. So I made a concentrated effort to cut out the negative thoughts and replace them with a more positive outlook. One of the best things I've ever done.

Sounds like you have come to a similar impasse. Some behaviors simply aren't productive, and you shouldn't make time for them.