my lowest point and the most magnetic men i've ever met

jhonny9546

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Anyone has their lowest point in life, right? That hit hard and told me there was something that needed to be changed. So I did. I started lifting weights, dressing well, being healthy, being more social, engaging with women and men more, learning about psychology and why sexual market value (SMV) works.

Then something happened that affected me more than ever. I was working in a coffee shop as a coffee specialist. The owner, a bald, fat and very ugly man in his thirties, was a "naughty" but "kind" person at the same time. He had a beautiful wife, also in her thirties, two children, and anyone who came into contact with him felt in command of him. He had the so called "mask" because after talking to someone and putting on a "good listener" face, he would gossip about them behind their back. I wondered how such a man could be a magnet for people (and even for women), if people knew he would soon talk "dirty" about them? You can't believe how this man could get women to always talk and laugh at everything he said. (women really loved that they could bring him or wait for him about gossip about other people.)
I could not understand this thing, since I really hate to talk or ironize about other people on their back.
But women came back to him. He was probably 70% of his time talking about other people with a women, making her laugh..
There was clearly something I couldn't see that this man had.
You can feel like him was very "****y" and "naughy" person, but at the same time you can feel his as trusthworthy. But I couldn't explain if he did it naturally, or if it was acting like "naturally", but instead He was doing a lot of work underneath.
In the room you could feel how he always had other people's attention. It was obvious that he was looking for it, like putting himself on the "center of attention", and the way he got her that he made seem completely natural.

But The way he treated his wife then amazed me even more.
Between them at work, I have never seen them kiss or touch each other. Rather he limited himself to "not complying" with his wife's requests. He was very harsh and strict with her, but sometimes, he made fun of her, made noises and had the attitude of a 5 year old. To top it off, he seemed annoyed when she came and asked for something. This woman seemed deranged in her behavior, either she was always laughing, or she was angry. (Infact she would leave the restaurant in full rage, from time to time)

This man also had another side to note, that he was almost "beyond" kind to people. But wasn't he a **** man? He never complied with his wife's requests, he talked behind everyone's back, but is he now a gentleman? In fact, if there was a friend in need, he would leave the restaurant just to help him.
Or if the door knob wasn't working anymore, He would lose his time to fix it.

Also, the latest big thing.
I don't know whether to believe it because I couldn't confirm it, but I was told that it was mostly his wife who was begging him for sex, rather than him. It was as if she asked him, in the form of a prayer, to have sex. Incredible, I was really in disbelief. His wife was really beautiful, like a 7 7.5. How dare you could believe she would crave sex from a 3/4 man?
As someone told here on the forum, we as humans, have a brain, and that it's the thing you have to control right?

From this moment on I understood that we can have our SMV through the roof, and still fail. Just look at famous and divorced people. So I said to myself, that there must be something that goes beyond everything - looks, money, status - and it attracts like a magnet everything. This is fuking the brain right?
I would like to learn this secret, whether it is a behavior or something else.
And Just as I learned math tables or formulas, I want to learn the theory first and then apply it.


Some questions

Will this entire process require us to act "unnaturally" to our person and behaviour, but let the exterior feel like it's "natural"? I mean, you have your values, and you don't own this skill. Would you need to act like a "fake" person in order to be magnetic?

Are person like this guy born "natural", because they didn't study to be, or can we all learn and be able to unlock this "magnet" that is within us and look like natural?

Can we manage to do this even while remaining healthy, stoic, true, loyal, honest people and not pieces of ****, fakes and puppets?

Once you have learned these things on a theoretical and practical level, then know how to apply them and manage to be a magnet, do you feel as if you are too "above" of others and situations, and you lose respect for yourself?

Are those behaviours working because the other human being you are wanting to "fukk the brain", it's "weak" "damaged" and so prone to "follow others" or to be "manipulated"?

Last but not least
or at least, the most important thing:

If we have to do all this work beforehand, this mean that we need to consider this as a job, and keep working in order to keep the relationships we have, and will have. Is this worth? Is it worth to become a master on acting "magnetic", know how to do it, because that will cause another person to be "addicted" to you? Will this generate fake relationships near you, and not deep and really loving/lasting ones?
I mean this is a lot of work, because for some people it's not in their nature somehow.
So basically, is it worth to change your nature to be another person, for the sake of gaining those "skills"?
What would you gain, and What would you lose?
 
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BaronOfHair

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"If we have to do all this work beforehand, this mean that we need to consider this as a job, and keep working in order to keep the relationships we have, and will have. Is this worth?"

Yeah. If you want not only women, but people who aren't societal dregs to gravitate towards you, then it's imperative that you look after your self. This requires effort
 

jhonny9546

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"If we have to do all this work beforehand, this mean that we need to consider this as a job, and keep working in order to keep the relationships we have, and will have. Is this worth?"

Yeah. If you want not only women, but people who aren't societal dregs to gravitate towards you, then it's imperative that you look after your self. This requires effort
I'll explain it better. WIth this i mean that shall we:

1) Be without a mask and make true relationships with people.
2) Be with a mask and make fake relationships with people.

?
 

BaronOfHair

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1) Be without a mask and make true relationships with people.
2) Be with a mask and make fake relationships with people.

?
Yes, wear a f-cking mask when you're in the presence of a beautiful woman. Most men's true self resembles Steve O far more than it does Gary Cooper, and no woman worth bedding is wet and wild over Steve O
 

jhonny9546

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Yes, wear a f-cking mask when you're in the presence of a beautiful woman. Most men's true self resembles Steve O far more than it does Gary Cooper, and no woman worth bedding is wet and wild over Steve O
How would people that know you without the mask start to act if they see you change?
Also, another important thing since I see this IRL it's pretty common.

Usually, a men and a women in an LTR, which use a daily mask, would have "gossip" conversations talking "dirt on the back of other people" about other people life events.
Are they still keeping that mask for a moment, or are they keeping it, even when having a talk in their LTR?

I saw this between "best friends" too.
I saw this man and his men best friend having a conversation.
Then, right after, this men would confidently tell her girl about his "best friend" and they had this gossip conversation with her entire family.

Is this something about nature of us human, or is this a part of the mask?
In the case of that "gossip" conversation, are we keeping the mask, or are we getting that off?
 

jhonny9546

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There are always anomalies
I don't have a true mature men guide for my life.
I strive to seek one, and emulate his behaviour to bring that to my subconcious, so I can start to be like a great men should be!
But I don't know what to trust.
 

BaronOfHair

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Usually, a men and a women in an LTR, which use a daily mask, would have "gossip" conversations talking "dirt on the back of other people" about other people life events
In your case, "wearing a mask" would mean: Not rambling on at length about your sister and brother in law's difficulties, or whether or not some chick a friend of a friend is engaged to is a nymphomaniac, no matter how strong your urge to gossip is. That's not just feminine behavior, but behavior characteristic of little girls in junior high
 

jhonny9546

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In your case, "wearing a mask" would mean: Not rambling on at length about your sister and brother in law's difficulties, or whether or not some chick a friend of a friend is engaged to is a nymphomaniac, no matter how strong your urge to gossip is. That's not just feminine behavior, but behavior characteristic of little girls in junior high
Women are magnetically actracted by a men who possess this quality. Why?
(This doesn't mean I have it, I just saw it IRL)
 

BaronOfHair

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Women are magnetically actracted by a men who possess this quality
Why are women attracted to men who don't gossip like tween girls? Same reason men aren't attracted to lobotomized baboons like Ramsay and Jones here

Classy, high-quality woman avoid people who gossip, just as cultivated men don't associate with trailer trash or ghetto garbage
 
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jhonny9546

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Classy, high-quality woman avoid people who gossip, just as cultivated men don't associate with trailer trash or ghetto garbage
I was saying the contrary, that women are usually actracted by man who have the traits of be a "gossip person". And you're saying that is basically a cheap women with a red flag right?
 

BaronOfHair

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I was saying the contrary, that women are usually actracted by man who have the traits of be a "gossip person". And you're saying that is basically a cheap women with a red flag right?
Yes, that's what I'm saying
 

jhonny9546

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Yes, that's what I'm saying
So, since I hate doing gossip but it happen to be in the moment that someone is doing some of it, what would you do in that case?
Just listen and be indifferent?
Listen and reply what?

Personally, I like to reply with my rational thoughts about it
 

BaronOfHair

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Personally, I like to reply with my rational thoughts about it
You're deeply enmeshed with your "feminine energy", and desperate for a rationalization to continue partaking in gossip, when you could simply change the subject
 

oOh Nasty

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You're deeply enmeshed with your "feminine energy", and desperate for a rationalization to continue partaking in gossip, when you could simply change the subject
You might be on to something.

OP, do you work out? Do you have enough animal proteins in your diet? All of these tactics and strategies you're asking for seem to be masking a more deep-ingrained problem in yourself.
 

BaronOfHair

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All of these tactics and strategies you're asking for seem to be masking a more deep-ingrained problem in yourself.
The story of every man(And hell, probably most women also)these days. The sh-t we mistake for being our primary obstacle is really one facet of a larger problem
 

oOh Nasty

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Women are magnetically actracted by a men who possess this quality. Why?
(This doesn't mean I have it, I just saw it IRL)
If you were able to secretly video-record the interactions between this man and the women which you deem are being receptive and attracted to him, the members here would probably be able to pinpoint the reasons why he's "attractive" to women.

Perhaps you're not seeing the full picture. In general, being "gossipy" is negative, unless you do it in a certain way that doesn't come off as you seeming like a typical female gossiper. It could be that he's adding dark and sarcastic or self-deprecating humor to it. It's probably a mix of many things. He could be good-looking, have good body language, have established value in the social circle, etc... But for some reason, you seem to be fixated on the "gossiping" part of their interactions.

It could also be that, the action of men talking behind others' backs right after talking to the subject of gossip, has no factor in their attraction scale. Perhaps these men are already attractive in their own ways, but just happen to like to gossip. But I highly doubt them having this sort of behavior, which is specifically "gossip" in its purest and negative form, has anything to do with what makes them attractive.
 

Mike32ct

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I was saying the contrary, that women are usually actracted by man who have the traits of be a "gossip person"
I’ll just give my experience here for whatever it’s worth. If women see a guy as a friend/bro only, she will feel comfortable sharing gossip with him.

If he gossips to her or with her, it just reinforces his beta or friendzone image. I don’t believe it’s attractive at all.
 
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