My journey or should I say journal of Self improvement

[Athos]

Good night with my man Pulse and a new pua friend 'Logic'. Another mate of mine who wanted to see what it was all about came along.

I was on fire with the approaches. Best night so far. Seems I just needed to take a few days off and chill out. I didn't escalate much, no numbers or anything... BUT my goal basically, was to get comfortable opening sets in the club scene, walking around town etc.

Goal achieved (I think). Perhaps the only girls I think I still have a little trouble with is the 8/9/10 where I'm a bit intimidated by their looks but apart from that not much.

There was two sets where I could have number closed but didn't and then lost them. Apart from that too many to count, really was on fire. I'm feeling really good about approaching.

The way I see it now is that I really don't care what they think because I'm HIGH VALUE. Yeah I'll say it again HIGH VALUE and that I'm GRACING THEM with my conversation. Really did sink in today.

Will try and right some more detail tomorrow. Atm it's 4 am. Time to get some shut eye.

 

[Athos]

Sarging last night.

We're just sitting at a table and there's a 3 set or 4 set but they are sitting on different sides of the table and not talking. I approach the hottest one who is probably only a 7.5.

Me: Hey I got a quick question would you date your best friends ex?
HB7: No!! Never
Me: Oh man why? You going to stand in the way of true love?
HB7: Well I guess it depends how much they're into each other blahblah (I think I gestured to my friend over their who was into my "ex".)

Then I randomly transitioned to:

Me: So what's your name?
Her: Laughs, that was good, I've never heard that one before (LOL you must not get hit on by any pua's)
Me: Thanks, I'm very creative
Me: So what do you like to do for fun?
HB7:Umm... hang out with mates, relax blahblah (no hobbies of her own WTF?)
Me: Wow, that sounds a bit boring *laugh*.

Then I messed up a little. LOL

Me: Well I like to skate! It's awesome, have you ever been skating?
Her: When I was like 5 but I don't want to do that
Me: *Thinking wow you're boring and you don't get out much* Anyway, what do you do?
Her: Studying to be a early childhood care teacher
Me: Blahblah *lots of fluff talk*

Me: My friend just started work at a cafe near blahblah
Her: Ooh I love coffee
Me: Oh okay, cool lets go get some
Her: You're too young! (WTF? I think at some point I revealed that I'm only first year uni)
Me: What, how old are you? LOL
Her: Guess
Me: *OH **** I don't want to know* Ahh, well, let me make it easy for you *gets phone out and hands it to her* She starts TYPING IT IN LOL this **** is crazy. Then she's like "No you're too young"
Me: Oh wow haha you could have told me that 10 minutes ago
Her: I like how outgoing you are blahblah and I like this about you but... you're too young. Sorry for wasting your time or something
Me: It's cool, haha, have a good night.

LOL it felt so good to not even care. I really didn't care at all. Actually I don't know if that's the right word... Like you know when you don't even think about stuff? Oh this happens. Okay. Moving on.

Boom. Personally I feel she was giving me ioi's - the convo was quite long so I can't remember some **** but when there was a silence she'd start talking again trying to keep it going.

Oh, yeah I got her to introduce me to her friends etc. but one was friendly to me but not my wing, so he said **** it and left them to their boring ass, sitting alone by themselves life.

How can I improve: Obviously find some more interesting **** to talk about. **** I hate the boring ass interview style questions... "What do you do", "WHere are you from" but I guess it'll take some time for me to feel more comfortable in sets not to resort to those questions.

My wing and my mate watching said it was going really good at the start. Oh yeah, I tried to start kino right of the bat. Like playfully elbowing her or grabbing her etc.

They said that I didn't escalate enough or what not sure what they meant. Personally I think I need to maintain more eye contact. I kept looking around.

A problem for me is that I'm focused on keeping disinterested body language, and not appearing to into her.

From now on I'm going to try increase eye contact.

So yeah list. 1. Convo topics - chill out a bit so I can vibe more
2. Eye contact/body language
3. Keep anything that reveals my age (I never actually told her
how old I was) out

A few more sets... **** it's hard to remember.

HB8 sitting by herself. My friend had just got blown out straight away ***** shield pretty high seems like so I decide **** it lets take this girl down a notch.

Sit down next to her.

Me: Hey what's up
Her: *doesn't smile* uhh
Me: Oh, you don't like meeting new people? Don't you feel like socializing?

BOOM. I CAN FEEL A CRACK IN THE ***** SHIELD, CAPTAIN! Lmfao, I can hear it in my head. Too bad I lost steam.

Her: It's not that, I'm drunk blahblah, just don't feel like talking
Me: OH! So you want to talk to me later?
Her: ???
Me: Okay, well how about you give me your number and I'll talk to you when you're feeling better
Her: No
Me: Ah, well, your loss.

Look on her face was PRICELESS, lmfao. *****es need to get low. Lower than last time. UNDER UNDER.

God what a good night. We were driving down town and I was being my usual stupid self. Yelling out to every couple we passed at the top of my voice.

It was either: "SMACK HER WITH A ****" or "**** HER IN THE ASS".

Oh, we got opened by a set. 8 maybe, pretty fine. She was sitting beside us and then ups and leaves. THen comes back and starts talking to my friend?

It's the three of us. Me and Pulse blahblah and then she's talking to my Afc friend. Eventually he gets blown out when she says can you buy me a drink?

He starts saying some **** about how he has no money LOL. Man, me and Pulse just left it for him cause we were hoping he could have taken it somewhere. Not saying that we DEFINITELY could have but yeah. Maybe she was just a golddigger.

Annoying thing was, he says something later like: "Funny how the girl leaves both you guys to talk to me" or something just as stupid.

Maybe she has a magnet that attracts CHUMPS. Not to mention we were just trying to get you some action.

My standard response now if a girl asks me to buy her a drink will be: What the ****? You broke?

I like it.

Okay, fat chick standing at bar. Maybe a 5.

Me: Hey how's your night going?
Her: BIG SMILE (OMFG HE'S TALKING TO ME??!?!) Pretty good! What about you?
me: not bad just chilling
her: I'm here with a 21st or something.
Me: Oh, you're having the party here ?
Her: noo, we split up after the party and blahblah
me: Okay cool. Eject.

Couple more sets here and there. The AA is still hard to understand. Sometimes it's none existent but sometimes it's there full force. Guess it depends if I'm in state or not. Oh well, I'm in "state' more often now so that's good.

Another thing is, pulse wasn't feeling it and wasn't able to make many approaches. This puts me off for some reason lol. We usually push each other and even though I was feeling good to make approaches, it just seemed like I couldnt because he couldnt.

Like you look to your wing to validate your ability to approach? LOL This is only okay if he does it too!

Ah, anyway, more bricks in the palace as Macalik likes to say. Sup bro, you're a boss.

 

[Athos]

Oh wow. It's been a while.

Saturday night.

We go out. Buy a bottle of vodka. The rest is history. I think no "proper" game...

We were just mixing 70/30 and eh... Staying away from that stuff. We just yelled out the stupidest sh1et and blah blah. Can't give myself credit because it was just liquid courage.

Was a pretty crap week for me. Been staying at home too much cause my car broke/not been going to the gym.

And I don't know but my self esteem plummeted lol. God, I was telling myself all day that I wasn't good looking enough to get a hot chick. Retarded bull$h1t.

Anyway, went gaming again last night. FuC, we were both so off. I think I didn't push myself that extra bit to open properly - oh and I'd left my id at home so I couldnt get in clubs anyway.. So we had to do street game and moving sets I've had some trouble with.

I don't know what it was but it was hard to open... Like we weren't in state at all. We sat down, started yelling out "Hey girls, how's your night going?" A lot said hello, a lot ignored us after looking at us. LOL what is it with these white girls, haha. Because I yelled out hello, or Hi, how's it going to like 30 people driving down and pretty much every non-white person said some form of greeting or waved in response.

Eh better than nothing. Became easier after a couple sets and I was doing it for every group that walked by. Then 1 chick that I say that too comes up to us and asks if she can use our phone to put her sim card in cause she lost her friends... This girl was drunk as fuc LOL

So funny. I mate obliged, and then her friends come by. She doesn't introduce us and her friends don't say hello BUT ask if they can also use my friends phone (LOL??) jesus christ.

Eh I make small talk with this drunk girl but it goes no where. Then this girl that we gave the phone two, well one of her friends says something to this maori girl walking by. She says something about her skirt or something and WOW this b1ch be crazy yo.

She comes up like all in her face "what did you say??" "Oh, I have that skirt at home its from glassons". I didn't hear what she'd said first but yeah.

And this girl is like "Im a kick boxer, Ill knock you out or what not." And the guy with her is like supporting her. Like what the hell man get your b1tczh on a LEASH. lawl. Times like this I wish I'd stop being lazy and start focusing more on karate.

I like knowing I can take care of myself in situations like that. I mean i yell out stupid stuff all the time LOL its just i havent gotten into a situation where it can escalate into violence yet.

Ehh, yeah so we try open a bit more don't really open...

OH go back to the beginning of the night. WE got opened so much... Yet we weren't in state. First up it's driving. Chick pulls her window down and talks to us at the traffic light. Pulse doesn't know what to say cause she's drunk and stuff but still giving ioi's. She's like "you want my number?" and then saying how a silvia is better than his skyline (I lol'd cause he's got a done up prelude that has sweet paintjob SHINY PURPLE that he takes to drag races) but this is his second car. So that goes nowhere.

Then some girls open us going up to the casino.. but he doesn't transition and I'm so out of state that I dont say sh1t.

ANother couple of dudes open us as the night goes by but Im like frozen and cant talk.

Eh. End of the night it seems like some stuff has become clear. I can't do 'inner game' just at night. It's got to be something thats a part of me 24/7. So, trying to feel good, be chill and confident all the time.

Thats numero uno and 2 is have more faith in myself. You got to believe you can do it thats the difference between success and failure.

3. Just chill and talk about anything. I realized I've been outcome dependant every single time I've gone out. Like it's been in my head "I have to n clsoe, or I have to take this somewhere or what do i say next" instead of just listening.

Eh, I gotta sort my real life out tbh. Im on vaccation from uni till like March. I have no job. SLeep through a lot of the day. And apart from socializing here and there and gym - which Im not even doing now, I'm not doing anything useful. AYE got to get my sh1t sorted.

Peace

 

[Athos]

Went out tonight. Opened 1 set myself lol, pulse opened 2.

Our 3rd was the best, he number closed his chick and I would have n closed mine but she has a bf.

more details tomorrow.

 

[Athos]

Ooh, I can see some improvements.

We picked up a couple chicks last night from BK. A new pua mate of mine.

Eventually he started making out with his, and I messed up by not doing the same with mine.

It was ON though... And imo at least a 7. Idk it doesnt matter, I thought she was hot and I was into her.

So, lesson learnt... need to start making out when my more experienced buddy tells me to do it. Like she was asking for it... but I guess I've never even kissed a girl for more then 5 seconds... that I remember. So, I was a bit nervous about initiating.

I think it was okay when I was 17.. but I just turned 18.. so yes, I got to get this **** sorted sooooon.

Anyway, my mate thinks I ****blocked him - and he was a diiiick anyway. Dlv'd the crap out after me the entire night in sets and wouldnt give me a lift home.

Ah well, I caught the bus back at 8 am in the morning.

Boo ya.

 

[Athos]

Eh..

I feel a bit ****. I think I've taken this too far.

I decided I wasn't going to leave till I pulled a chick. So, let my friends go home... And stayed back...

And disregarded everything else. I was feeling ****/tired/bored/lonely (riding solo) and yadayadayada.

Well, I ran into another mate fortunately (not) big pua guy. yeyey.. And he went home with a 50 year old fat whale of a women.

I imagined it to be exciting and full of determination not to leave until we had what we wanted. I thought it would bring us closer to our goal and teach us..

Instead I felt sick. I felt sick at what I'm trying to become and how I had lost my friends the previous night and only gotten home at 10 am... and now here I was again. Let my friends leave at 2 am.. to stay by myself to get some tail.

The club we were in was full of fugly old chicks.. but this guy 'pua' dude has this rule which he follows religiously - its better then my hand. WHAT THE **** IS THIS? I realized that I still have some dignity left and I'm not going to ****ing pretend I'm attracted to some ugly chick that I'm not into... and I'm not buying this ****.

I'll hit on girls I'm actually into, and if I can't pull so ****ing what. I'll try again later.

Anyway, opened lots of sets.. chipped into that AA a little more... Today and even yesterday.. but TODAY most of all.. was you know the realization that it was up to me.

I was out by myself for the first time and I had left my ride and decided to do this. It made it harder to make excuses and I had no choice but to start opening - it was either that or have wasted my time and my night.

Anyway, a couple of numbers - i realy didnt give a **** so one of them it turns out i didnt even save - other one i gave her and saw her later and realized that the lighting made her look better.. still a 6 o well. This *****es be thinking they 8's and 9's and lastly i made a couple friends, I'm pretty good mates with this bouncer.. and not because I want "free" entry or some ****, but because he was a wise dude and i learnt some **** from him.

Ya, so a a lot of ****ing experience tonight... and some lessons learnt that I'm not gone so far into the void that I'll **** anything.. jesus i stil have some dignity.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Only PUA's aproach chicks that they don't feel attracted to, and only PUA's have aproach-anxiety aproaching chicks they don't feel attracted to. Because that identity is tied to their ego, they must continously reinforce it, and practice their skills on everyone in vicinity. Just felt like putting that out there.

I'm not feeling in my spot-on advice corner today, so I'm not gonna make this specific. It just seems that you had the wrong mindset. I think the solution here would be self-amusement. Go for what you want, but have fun doing it. Do and say whatever you think at that very moment, do it for your own fun and amusement, not for anyone's approval.
Nice determination mate, keep it going!

 

[Athos]

Thanks man. Your advice is appreciated as usual.

 

[Athos]

First couple of number closes in day game today.

Well technically it was night, but it was in the mall and yeah.

Opened with Date ur ex boyfriend **** w/e and just bull****ted the whole way.

It was like midnight or what ever and I just stopped them in the middle of the mall and we basically talked to them for like maybe 10 minutes.

I think i did really good personally, because there were no pauses, everything seemed to flow AND i multi thredded - that's something i've been working on. If that's the right name? Yeah so I didnt go back to old convo topics, and kept jumping from one thing to the next and never looked back.

So yeah, I took 1 chicks number, wing took the other.

Feeling pretty good.

Also another chick I've been gaming through facebook (though i originally met her at a 21st party) has been trying to get me to invite her etc.

going again tomorrow to get solid into day game.

I just realized how damn easy it is. Open. Talk. N close. Repeat.

 

[Athos]

Okay, its not that easy.

They seem to flake a lot.

Gah.. Im sort of tired of pick up atm because it doesn't seem to be going anywhere....

All the girls in town at night are so defensive. need to take a break