My gym trainer must be banging all the girls at my gym...

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....while all I can do is look on helplessly. Wanted to ask him how many girls he sacked in the gym, but just focused on my exercise and decided to be oblivious based on last night's thoughts.

Let me tell you what happened when I went into the gym today, and it stings.


Well, this is my second day of personal training, and went I went to meet my trainer, and saw him working with a hb, with his hands all over her legs. With the way she was interested in him, I'm sure they probably already fvcked.

Then we go to do some other sets of workout, and I see noticed a hb, and she came up to him, said hi or something, and he said he was working with me "XYZ", and she like ignored me and went to her exercises or something.

Then we continue doing exercises, and he's like talking with every HB that's coming on the gym, and they are like enjoying him. Hb's off all sizes and shapes, even Hb(etnics).

I need not go on, you are probably getting the drift. So, how does a 30 y/o virgin, who has never kissed or fondled a girl handle watching someone effortlessly go up and chat up with hb's, who enjoy his company, and who will even go up to him to interrupt his time. Well, all I can tell you, is that I have all the motivation that I need to finish my training, and I'm definately going to be improving my physique like fvcking crazy, and hopefully by four weeks there will be some progress.

Darn - let me think of some theories for this so I can feel better.

- He's a personal trainer working in the gym - so he's in a position of authority so that's attractive to gym patrons.

- He could potentially be a wing-man if I just open shields - usually when he talks to women or anything today, I pretended they weren't there and blocked everything out - like I was totally asexual. Just focused on the exercise.

Looks like this is going to be a tight one. I'm committed to improving my looks, muscles and physique, and think that what happeed today could be used for motivation to do just that, obviously, the better body and posture that I have, the more confident and relaxed I would feel.

But, geeze, the contrast, here I am looking at woman and feel like I'm giving them the creeps when I'm trying to talk to them, while this other guy is like breezing right through.
 

squirrels

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I dunno if he's banging them all. Being "sexy" is part of a male trainer's salespitch. The ladies all want to go home and tell their friends about the hot guy who's working them out.

But depending on how he looks, he probably COULD get a lot of them in the sack.

The difference between you and him is that HE has a legitimate non-romantinc reason to talk to these women and YOU haven't yet realized that you don't NEED one.

I don't hit at girls at the gym either, though...just something I've never done. Probably stupid to limit myself like that, but the fact that you see them in there all the time would make any rejection awkward.
 

Ojete

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Just bulk with a proper training plan & diet, and if you dedicate 100% to it, in a few months you will be him.
 

skip2mylou781

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ull have a ridiculous aura of confidence the second u start to see urself improving physically, and the rest will follow.........
 

Kings_royalty

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But, geeze, the contrast, here I am looking at woman and feel like I'm giving them the creeps when I'm trying to talk to them, while this other guy is like breezing right through

Looks and his job description have little to do with his success with woman. It sounds like your trainer knows how to appeal to women. He knows how to turn up their interest level and attraction. Now, add to the fact that other hbs see him training women, his value (in their eyes) goes up instantly. That's a win/win combination.
 

skip2mylou781

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his trainer has a GREAT body im sure, thats why the chicks want him - simple
 

hi2u

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You're overlooking quite a bit by saying it's JUST his looks.

1) This guy is used to touching and talking to attractive women who are physically fit. This gives him confidence, and he's had time to develop his touch to the point where he's always getting "yes" responses and never comes across as creepy or overbearing.

2) He is used to being essentially, a "salesman" and deals with people on a daily basis. His job is to make his clients feel good about themselves and about the whole situation.

3) Most likely he has become a professional flirt, giving older women the fantasy that they are still sexually attractive. The more proficient he is at this, the more these women will come back to him for more training.
 

wayword

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Women are all power groupies. That's why they like men in uniform. This guy is an authority figure there. That's why they all kiss his ass.

Outside of the gym though, he's just another nobody. I gaurantee you he won't be getting the same treatment outside of his jurisdiction. Or same guy at the gym, but WITHOUT the official "personal trainer" title...also = another nobody.

E.g. - On these bus tours through the EU, the bus driver is usually some scruffy scrub who can't get a real job. BUT, since he is the "tour head" (alpha male by job position), he ALWAYS lays one of the girls on tour - usually a hot young co-ed who normally wouldn't even fart in his direction!
 

Desdinova

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saw him working with a hb, with his hands all over her legs. With the way she was interested in him, I'm sure they probably already fvcked.
That's called Kino, and it's something that YOU should be doing with the women you meet. Well, not necessarily touching their legs, but touching them non-sexually.

and I see noticed a hb, and she came up to him, said hi or something, and he said he was working with me "XYZ", and she like ignored me and went to her exercises or something.
So she's a regular at the gym and she knows him. What does that have to do with anything? She wasn't ignoring you, she just doesn't have any kind of rapport with you.

Then we continue doing exercises, and he's like talking with every HB that's coming on the gym, and they are like enjoying him. Hb's off all sizes and shapes, even Hb(etnics).
You have to realize that he works there, and people go to him for help and advice just like you do. Over time, he gets to know some of the regulars. You're over-analyzing everything, and it's all probably much simpler than you think.

Quit envying other people and work more on yourself. The more you tell yourself that you're unsuccessful, the harder it's going to be for you to succeed. Drop the negative mindset and start looking at the positives of what you've been doing over the past little while. Everytime you take another step (no matter how small) toward your goal, tell youself how great you're doing.
 

skip2mylou781

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personal trainers are VERY muscular...they have to be if ur gonna take their advice seriously!

as long as hes got ANY kind of good personality, women will be all over him due to the initial mouth-dropping eye goggling that they get from seeing a sexy man like that.

It all starts with looks and it all ends in personality.........without starting, its very very hard to end....LUKE
 
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Espi said:
ASAP:

Tell your PT to introduce you to ALL women who approach him, and tell him to introduce you to all HB's in your gym. Stop observing the game and get on the court, Luke. :) You have the chance to meet many beautiful women through this man.
Epsi, I was shell-shocked, you have to put yourself in a WBAFC 30 y/o virgin that's a walking stick shoes next to hot alpha-male that's getting all the chicks and you feel like you get hit with a stun-ray.

Ok, seriously, I'll bring that up next time, this is good information, especially since I acted like a total asexual to shield myself.

Epsi said:
As far as the HB knows, you and the PT are good friends, or, you're a very important client, which is why he's introducing you. Carpe Diem!!
The hb didn't even make eye contact with me, he introduced me to her, but she didn't seem to care.

Epsi said:
This is an unprecedented opportunity for you. Use this man to demonstrate your higher value. For example, when a HB approaches him, make eye contact and smile, Luke. Remember the smile is the trademark Alpha characteristic.
Make eye contact if she doesn't make eye contact with me. I haven't been getting any looks from women during the Jedi bootcamp, and I'm certainly not even getting them next to the personal trainer, it's like I'm totally invisible.

Epsi said:
After he introduces you to the girl, say something like this:

LUKE (to PT): You train this girl? Wow. I hope you don't go easy on her."

(she'll respond BLAH BLAH BLAH)

LUKE: Well, PT, I have to get back to my training. Nice meeting you, HB. I'll see you around, maybe."
Ok, well, let's see what I can apply here.

Next time I see my PT - now we are assuming this doesn't have to be the next PT session, which I'm deferring for four weeks to get used to my new alternating exercise routine. Right now, my PT probably things I'm asexual so I'll have to break the ice to show interest in girls general - and then ask him to introduce me to them.

I'll try this line out I suppose when I do. It seems an easy line to adopt, and since I'm talking to the trainer, not the hb, at least on the first line, it seems 'easy' to do. But if i do it more than once it may feel ackward, well, maybe the trainer can give some tips there. Great idea, book another session, and make him my wing-man. (have to think about that one)

This is good information - I'll follow up with it and post it on this thread to see where it goes. But, I'd like have to be in a session with him to do this, and change it to a partial wing-man operative, and partial training operative both in one, can this be done outside the training session?
 
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skip2mylou781 said:
personal trainers are VERY muscular...they have to be if ur gonna take their advice seriously!
This one is not VERY muscular, he's black, like 6'4 or something.

He does seem to have a relaxed ease, similar to my Uncle, when approaching or talking to women. For example, he has a relaxed body language, he smiles and points, engages in light kino.

I see people with large muscles at that gym, and they aren't at all remotely as popular as this guy, maybe just a bit more popular than I am, but not much more. Now, granted, I want to improve my muscle composition, because, that's what the DJ bible said somewhere, and I'm just blindly following it, whether it makes sence or not, I just hope this investment goes somewhere. I do believe, that if I have a good physique that will help with confidence as it is a facet with improvement so I'm taking it seriously.
 

Desdinova

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Epsi, I was shell-shocked, you have to put yourself in a WBAFC 30 y/o virgin that's a walking stick shoes next to hot alpha-male that's getting all the chicks and you feel like you get hit with a stun-ray.
You're forgetting that MOST of the guys on this site (including myself) have been in your shoes. That's why most of us are here; to learn how to fix this phobia of women that we have, and to figure out how and why some guys are successful with women and why we aren't. Then, we go out there and work at fixing the problems.

I haven't been getting any looks from women during the Jedi bootcamp, and I'm certainly not even getting them next to the personal trainer, it's like I'm totally invisible.
That's when you FORCE her to pay attention to you by approaching, making eye contact with her, and having a conversation. Don't go by the woman's schedule, create your own and have her follow it with you. Women want a guy who takes the initiative and leads, not the guy who spends his life waiting for things to just happen.

Right now, my PT probably things I'm asexual so I'll have to break the ice to show interest in girls general
Why the hell are you going to the gym? If you're going there to meet women or even to make yourself more appealing to women, you're attending for all the wrong reasons. You're there to get in a workout, NOT to pick up women. You're going there to get in a great workout and feel like Godzilla. Workouts should bring you personal satisfation. Go find women somewhere else. Your time at the gym is spent to make yourself more healthy and feel great. Women should only be a side project that you can take or leave because that's not the reason you're there.
 

wayword

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Luke Skywalker said:
This one is not VERY muscular, he's black, like 6'4 or something.
Ahhh, well there ya go. He's a TALL BLACK guy.

You know what that stereotype says to a woman?

Physical alpha male with BIG manding0 kawk. It's simply a deep-seated fantasy that most modern women have, especially in the US. You will only pale in comparison standing next to him, becoming literally invisible. Not to mention the fact that you are his CLIENT - in other words his OMEGA BYCH.

He is simply a GOD within his environment, sorry. He has the racial stereotype, authority figure and height working for him like a multiple threat. Bang, bang, bang!
 
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Desdinova said:
Why the hell are you going to the gym? If you're going there to meet women or even to make yourself more appealing to women, you're attending for all the wrong reasons. You're there to get in a workout, NOT to pick up women. You're going there to get in a great workout and feel like Godzilla. Workouts should bring you personal satisfation. Go find women somewhere else. Your time at the gym is spent to make yourself more healthy and feel great. Women should only be a side project that you can take or leave because that's not the reason you're there.
I'm going to the gym to improve my physique, build some muscles, you know what it says in the DJ bible, I'm taking it seriously, 30-45 minutes of good solid workout 3 times a week, part of my new program.

I'm not there to pick up and bag women, however, you have to understand that when you are beside an alpha-male that's getting lots of positive woman attention, then you feel like a total beta-male loser, at the time.

Like I said, this can be a good motivator to stick to the program, and as Epsi said, this could also be an opportunity, provided I break my 'asexual ice' with the trainer and tell him I'm interested in meeting some girls there next time I see him or something. This guy's like a chick magnet, and should be used as a wing-man to rap with some girls. I'm going to see if he will help me out there next time and psyche myself up for some serious action.
 
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wayword said:
Ahhh, well there ya go. He's a TALL BLACK guy.

You know what that stereotype says to a woman?

Physical alpha male with BIG manding0 kawk. It's simply a deep-seated fantasy that most modern women have, especially in the US. You will only pale in comparison standing next to him, becoming literally invisible. Not to mention the fact that you are his CLIENT - in other words his OMEGA BYCH.

He is simply a GOD within his environment, sorry. He has the racial stereotype, authority figure and height working for him like a multiple threat. Bang, bang, bang!
Well, that makes me feel allot better. Omega B1tch, never heard of that one, but whatever that sounds like, I sure felt like that.

So you think I just have to keep up those asexual shields since it sounds like a lost cause, or should I try to capatalize?

My Uncle is also a tall Black man too. So, I dont know, Epsi's advice sounds cool, but if you are invisible, then you are invisible, right - there is a better chance on my own then beside him in terms of probability of success the way this is sounding. This sounds confusing.
 

wayword

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Luke Skywalker said:
So you think I just have to keep up those asexual shields since it sounds like a lost cause, or should I try to capatalize?
Of course never give up! Persistence is keeping the frame that YOU ARE DA PRIZE, no matter how ridiculous it may sound to others...until your frame slowly overrides theirs.

So, don't focus so much on another's strengths so that you forget your own.

Look, this PT is a fish in water there. He chose an environment perfectly-suited to floss his own strengths. THAT is the lesson you should take from him, not trying to beat him at his own game (which you will probably die trying).

Figure out what YOUR strengths are, hone them and then find the proper environment to showcase them.
 

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hi2u said:
You're overlooking quite a bit by saying it's JUST his looks.

1) This guy is used to touching and talking to attractive women who are physically fit. This gives him confidence, and he's had time to develop his touch to the point where he's always getting "yes" responses and never comes across as creepy or overbearing.

2) He is used to being essentially, a "salesman" and deals with people on a daily basis. His job is to make his clients feel good about themselves and about the whole situation.

3) Most likely he has become a professional flirt, giving older women the fantasy that they are still sexually attractive. The more proficient he is at this, the more these women will come back to him for more training.
exactly it isn't just his status and muscles, who says you can't do what this guy does, the most your going to realise is your going to have that muscle and nothing will change much, what you need is time in field and work on your game itself that way you can have the girls acting like that towards you too.
 

hope7

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im a skinny dude who also gets ignored by da ladies. However, im bulking fast now that i upped my training and diet up a notch, (gonna gain 20 lbs per year) and I can already notice the difference in attitudes women give to me.
 
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hope7 said:
im a skinny dude who also gets ignored by da ladies. However, im bulking fast now that i upped my training and diet up a notch, (gonna gain 20 lbs per year) and I can already notice the difference in attitudes women give to me.
Oh really? How long did it take since you started working out to notice a difference? My trainer says I should change in four week of consistent work-out (with incremental intensity). Did it take four weeks with you too?
 
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