My girlfriend is out drinking with her hoe friend

[MatureDJ]

Please explain how

Uh, an "infidel" is what a Muslim calls a non-Muslim.

 

[MatureDJ]

Girls do cheat. I deployed in the Marines and they tell you when you least expect it.

I was watching a PBS documentary about life on an aircraft carrier, and one of the seamen was told my his woman when he called that she was leaving, and no longer needed his seamen.

 

[forcerecon01]

I was watching a PBS documentary about life on an aircraft carrier, and one of the seamen was told my his woman when he called that she was leaving, and no longer needed his seamen.

And that's one example. Dear John letters are common

 

[Murk]

Once a hoe, always a hoe. But you always write about how you intend on leaving her but don't end up doing it. Just accept that you're going to stay with a wh0r3, that goes out to bars at 1am with her slutty friends probably getting d!cked down by a gang of men while you sit at your place alone, and that you like the rush you get from it.

No Cbear, I always said I was giving it to the end of the year, and I only posted about wanting to break up in May/June. She’s never cheated on me, I have access to her phone she’s never even accepted a random on Insta she has 250+ requests. I mean I know the shock and awe must feel good as you hit send on a post like that but be factually accurate if you’re going to come at me while having Vietnam flashbacks of your own cuckery.

It's OVER for InfidelCels.

Non Muslims are the worst of all creatures (Quran 98:6)

 

[Murk]

I just want to offer my 2 cents because I see some people are taking the nuclear Andrew Tate approach.

1. I've been cheated on before but my last girlfriend was extremely loyal because I simply didn't care. She's hot but unlike all the other rich handsome guys that want to give her the world to get in her pants my power was in my ability to say "no" to her. She never had a guy who would deny her so I believe she was loyal because she knew how easy it would be for me to leave if she did.

2. As some of these others say, if you don't trust your girl to be out without you, that's another problem. I wouldn't tell her she can never go out again like some of these other guys because that sounds like you're desperate to hide her away from the world for fear of her finding somebody better than you. I WOULD be a little concerned if she made this a regular habit of going out without you while you're there and available, however.



Also, this part, if you're considering this option from this singular instance where even though she's out she's keeping you in the loop, then I think you have your own insecurity. Alternatively, if this is the last straw for you, it sounds like you're just looking for an excuse for a breakup fight. Neither of which is healthy.

Yeah she’s keeping me in the loop from 1am just because I happened to come on online on WhatsApp otherwise I’m sure should would never had said anything. We kind of had a fight and she left my place early, I’m healing from an injury and I’ve been snappy at her and wanted my own space. I never care what she does, it’s just the fact she’s gone drinking without my knowledge. Yes, telling me once she’s out drinking at 1am is without my knowledge for the people that need reminding.

This is definitely more a last straw situation than me going nuclear, I’m not going to tell her not to go out because ultimately I don’t care. I was just irked last night because it seems very sly, getting home at 3am without me. Yes I’ll be exiting the relationship but I also see that as a slight on me.

 

[BPH]

Yeah she’s keeping me in the loop from 1am just because I happened to come on online on WhatsApp otherwise I’m sure should would never had said anything. We kind of had a fight and she left my place early, I’m healing from an injury and I’ve been snappy at her and wanted my own space. I never care what she does, it’s just the fact she’s gone drinking without my knowledge. Yes, telling me once she’s out drinking at 1am is without my knowledge for the people that need reminding.

This is definitely more a last straw situation than me going nuclear, I’m not going to tell her not to go out because ultimately I don’t care. I was just irked last night because it seems very sly, getting home at 3am without me. Yes I’ll be exiting the relationship but I also see that as a slight on me.

Do what you want to do man, my point is that this doesn't seem like an "it's over" situation, but we also don't know your relationship.

I bolded the top part because I think this matters. When my ex cheated on me it was an unusual night because I was completely left out of the loop until I heard from her the next day when she admitted what she had done. Your girl here is informing you of what she's doing without you having to ask, so I would say that's a good thing.

Second, you mention that you recently had a fight and that you've been snappy at her. For starters, that's misdirected aggression, which is also unhealthy. If you're upset about something it definitely doesn't help a relationship to take it out on a partner who's trying to help. Building on that, you wanted space, and in a way, she gave it to you. And she informed you about what she was doing without needing prompting.

In all likelihood she's probably venting to her friend about how you've been lately and that friend is probably trying to convince her to leave you and meet a better guy or something.

It's your relationship, not mine, and at the risk of coming across as some sympathetic simp or something, I'm just looking at the behaviors YOU can control. If she messes up and you've done everything in your power to NOT push her to mess up, then you can walk away knowing you're not the a-hole in the situation. But if you're looking for an exit anyway then nothing we say really matters.

 

[Murk]

Do what you want to do man, my point is that this doesn't seem like an "it's over" situation, but we also don't know your relationship.

I bolded the top part because I think this matters. When my ex cheated on me it was an unusual night because I was completely left out of the loop until I heard from her the next day when she admitted what she had done. Your girl here is informing you of what she's doing without you having to ask, so I would say that's a good thing.

Second, you mention that you recently had a fight and that you've been snappy at her. For starters, that's misdirected aggression, which is also unhealthy. If you're upset about something it definitely doesn't help a relationship to take it out on a partner who's trying to help. Building on that, you wanted space, and in a way, she gave it to you. And she informed you about what she was doing without needing prompting.

In all likelihood she's probably venting to her friend about how you've been lately and that friend is probably trying to convince her to leave you and meet a better guy or something.

It's your relationship, not mine, and at the risk of coming across as some sympathetic simp or something, I'm just looking at the behaviors YOU can control. If she messes up and you've done everything in your power to NOT push her to mess up, then you can walk away knowing you're not the a-hole in the situation. But if you're looking for an exit anyway then nothing we say really matters.

I agree with all of this. Do you think I should bother mentioning anything or just carry on as normal?

 

[BPH]

I agree with all of this. Do you think I should bother mentioning anything or just carry on as normal?

Well, this is the part where your knowledge of the relationship and the situation you have, the things we don't know are going to matter.

If right now you're looking at how you've been behaving with her as far as you being snappy and are coming to the realization that you might've been a bit of a d*** to her lately, and are recalling how she's been trying to help you with an appreciation of those moments, then I would continue dating her and maybe with that new outlook from you, she won't feel the need to go to the bars with her friend without you.

If your relationship has been rocky and there are other factors at play with how you feel about this most recent issue, or if you're looking for an exit/don't see things working out, then by all means here's your ticket for a breakup fight.

 

[Murk]

Well, this is the part where your knowledge of the relationship and the situation you have, the things we don't know are going to matter.

If right now you're looking at how you've been behaving with her as far as you being snappy and are coming to the realization that you might've been a bit of a d*** to her lately, and are recalling how she's been trying to help you with an appreciation of those moments, then I would continue dating her and maybe with that new outlook from you, she won't feel the need to go to the bars with her friend without you.

If your relationship has been rocky and there are other factors at play with how you feel about this most recent issue, or if you're looking for an exit/don't see things working out, then by all means here's your ticket for a breakup fight.

That's either - 1. break up fight or 2. carry on and mention nothing.

I want the option where I confront the behavior and still keep her around for a bit. That's viable isn't it?

 

[member160292]

This is over-analyzing to the point you might be losing sleep, OP. It’s not as bad as many posters here make it seems. Only you can evaluate her actions, not any other members on here.

Quick thought…why did you ask her ‘how did you get home’

Does her response really matter?

 

[BPH]

That's either - 1. break up fight or 2. carry on and mention nothing.

I want the option where I confront the behavior and still keep her around for a bit. That's viable isn't it?

If you'd want to keep her I wouldn't recommend a "confrontation" as you put it. If you have more of an appreciation for her than a disdain for where you want to leave her, I would simply ask her how her night was and come to your conclusions based on how she responds to that.

Pay attention that I say "responds" rather than "answers". As in whether you think she's lying, being coy, downplaying things that may have happened, etc. Like if she's bubbly and isn't really thinking about her answers before giving them she's probably being truthful at the very least.

If you have concerns about her behavior or things that made you uncomfortable you can express those then. I wouldn't "put my foot down", because if something she did displeases you, she should avoid that behavior because she cares about you rather than needing to be instructed.

 

[Murk]

This is over-analyzing to the point you might be losing sleep, OP. It’s not as bad as many posters here make it seems. Only you can evaluate her actions, not any other members on here.

Quick thought…why did you ask her ‘how did you get home’

Does her response really matter?

I didn't lose sleep, I literally went to bed as she was texting me and woke up over an hour ago to run, drink coffee and work. Don't let these guys fool you, I'm losing no sleep and I'm not worrying she's out being triple teamed by Tyrone, Jermaine and Marquis

I asked her "how are you getting home?" which was an automatic reply I see nothing wrong with. I was sleeping by the time she messaged she was home.

If you'd want to keep her I wouldn't recommend a "confrontation" as you put it. If you have more of an appreciation for her than a disdain for where you want to leave her, I would simply ask her how her night was and come to your conclusions based on how she responds to that.

Pay attention that I say "responds" rather than "answers". As in whether you think she's lying, being coy, downplaying things that may have happened, etc. Like if she's bubbly and isn't really thinking about her answers before giving them she's probably being truthful at the very least.

If you have concerns about her behavior or things that made you uncomfortable you can express those then. I wouldn't "put my foot down", because if something she did displeases you, she should avoid that behavior because she cares about you rather than needing to be instructed.

I'm thinking to ignore her most of today I have things to do, I decided I'll not be confronting her on anything.

 

[BPH]

I'm thinking to ignore her most of today I have things to do, I decided I'll not be confronting her on anything.

Glad to hear you came to a decision, good luck to you.

 

[Murk]

Glad to hear you came to a decision, good luck to you.

Appreciate your advice you helped me put it all into perspective

 

[john1234]

If you can't trust your girl to go out one night you probably shouldn't be dating her already.

If I thought a girl would be svcking d!ck whenever I'm not looking, I wouldn't keep her under 24/7 watch, I'd cut her loose.


Is it really without you knowing if she told you?

Yup, that is right.

I'd say , when you stop trusting her completely, it's time to dump her.

If she is heading to ****tail bars to drink with friends, thats a big red flag! It would remove trust. She is not GF material.

Start spinning plates ASAP.

 

[Zimbabwe]

Give a woman an inch, and she will take a mile.

 

[soulforge]

Any update from op? Did she come back home or not

 

[European-DJ]

Seriously?? These comments are outraged.

Your GF is out with a slutty friend of hers. Yes, they will be approached, yes, your GF might have a chat with some random dudes due to her slutty friend wanting to get ****ed, but that doesn’t mean she’ll jump on a **** / **** any of these guys - a lot of you seem overly insecure.

Calm down. If you’ve done your vetting properly and know this girl, chances are slim that something will happen.. if something does happen, be happy that it happened now and now when you guys are married.

Her going out with her slutty friend is NOT ground for ditching her…

 

[Murk]

If she is heading to ****tail bars to drink with friends, thats a big red flag! It would remove trust. She is not GF material.

Start spinning plates ASAP.

This is my line of thinking. However I have no inclination for plates/new women I’m engrossed in my business and very happy without women for now.

Any update from op? Did she come back home or not

Yeah she text me at 2.30am “home at last” I viewed all the messages at 6,30 when I woke up and won’t be replying. She just tried to call me at 10:22am (the clocks went back) which I’ve ignored, not in the mood to speak to her yet. She doesn’t live with me just stays long periods of time.

 

[Murk]

Seriously?? These comments are outraged.

Your GF is out with a slutty friend of hers. Yes, they will be approached, yes, your GF might have a chat with some random dudes due to her slutty friend wanting to get ****ed, but that doesn’t mean she’ll jump on a **** / **** any of these guys - a lot of you seem overly insecure.

Calm down. If you’ve done your vetting properly and know this girl, chances are slim that something will happen.. if something does happen, be happy that it happened now and now when you guys are married.

Her going out with her slutty friend is NOT ground for ditching her…

No my issue is she’s putting herself in the shop window. Her best friend also apparently has a boyfriend so why they felt the need to go drinking for 4 hours on Saturday night in central london c0cktail bars is the reason I feel aggrieved, not because I think she’s going to cheat. They likely both been chatted up last night as they always get attention.