my girl wants to go clubbing with her friends

[pipe007]

hey fellow djs ... i have a situation... i have been dating my current gf for 4 months now.. and she told me that this saturday she wants to go out with her girlfriends dancing to a club.. the way she said it kind of told me that she wants to go alone with them.......

she has been good this past 4 months and the last time she went dancing was 2 months ago and that was with me.... should i tell her that i want to go with her??? should i let her go by herself and tell her that ill do the same???
i really care about my relationship with her.. so please dont just answer things like NEXT HER!!

feedback will be appreciated

 

[PhatE1vis]

Opportunity is knocking here for you.

Absolutely be cool with her going. Tell her to go have fun with her girls, and drop in that you'll make it a guy's night out for yourself.

It's a confident move, and if you trust her it'll be no big deal. The positives here are many - she'll appreciate your confidence, her FRIENDS will appreciate your confidence, and you'll feel good about yourself for being the man.

You can't go with her. You'll be a third wheel and look like a dbag.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Don't go with her, you'll be sucked into her world and unless you have very good skills, it will end badly. Secondly this shows you trust her and if you want to do something later she doesn't like the idea of you can mention you trusted her and bring up the club. Relax, guys like us are rare, very few people can approach a big set of girls and isolate a target.

 

[NickSCFC2000]

hey fellow djs ... i have a situation... i have been dating my current gf for 4 months now.. and she told me that this saturday she wants to go out with her girlfriends dancing to a club.. the way she said it kind of told me that she wants to go alone with them.......

she has been good this past 4 months and the last time she went dancing was 2 months ago and that was with me.... should i tell her that i want to go with her??? should i let her go by herself and tell her that ill do the same???
i really care about my relationship with her.. so please dont just answer things like NEXT HER!!

feedback will be appreciated

You're a freak, don't you ever go clubbing with your mates?

 

[Manolo]

hey fellow djs ... i have a situation... i have been dating my current gf for 4 months now.. and she told me that this saturday she wants to go out with her girlfriends dancing to a club.. the way she said it kind of told me that she wants to go alone with them.......

she has been good this past 4 months and the last time she went dancing was 2 months ago and that was with me.... should i tell her that i want to go with her??? should i let her go by herself and tell her that ill do the same???
i really care about my relationship with her.. so please dont just answer things like NEXT HER!!

feedback will be appreciated

What's the big deal? Let her go have fun with her friends. What I would do is plan something with your friends that same night. Don't end up being that "guy". You need to keep cool and stay calm, don't let your imagination stray. BE A MAN .. let her get all crazy about YOU going out with your friends the same night not the other way around.

 

[NotaNewbie]

i really care about my relationship with her

Next her before you catch something.. Oneitis

Hit her with the "Oh thank god i had somethin to do that night but didn't know how to tell you.." and don't tell her where you're going no matter how much she ask..

 

[Boston DJ]

Let her go. I'd encourage it. In a LTR you both got to do sh*t by yourselves, it is healthy. Last thing I would want is a clingy girl. I used to encourage the ex to do this s*it. It gets her out of your hair and you get to go grab some beers with your buddies. The result will be the same at the end of the night you are gonna be f*cking her and you didnt have to buy the hor drinks!!

 

[TONYMONTANA523]

Hell yeah let her go I call this the get out of jail card whenever you want to go out without her this is what you could use as an example of how you trust her and she should trust you.

 

[qshen]

Let her go,trust

 

[penkitten]

she's a big girl. let her go have some girlfriend time.
call up your boys and go hang at some other club.
have a good time.
meet up at your house or her house after wards.

 

[Obsidian]

Bah, Next the hor. If I were in an exclusive LTR with a girl and she felt the urge to go grind on a bunch of strangers, I'd read "LOW INTEREST LEVEL" and move on. No point in being in an (exclusive) relationship with a low-interest girl. Seriously man.

If she were just going out with her friends and having fun that would be one thing, but wtf do you think the purpose of a club is? The majority of modern dancing is little different from sex with clothes on. If you want to keep sexing this girl that's one thing, but have a little more respect for yourself. If she doesn't want to be exclusive with you, why do you want to be exclusive with her?

Of course, I'm tempted to agree with all the previous posters in this thread (that you should just be cool with it), but it's only for one reason: There's a good chance your girl won't go home and have a ONS with some other guy. But the very fact that she seems to be searching for such horishness is a bad sign.

 

[Fisherman]

This is the advice that you should follow:

Opportunity is knocking here for you.

Absolutely be cool with her going. Tell her to go have fun with her girls, and drop in that you'll make it a guy's night out for yourself.

It's a confident move, and if you trust her it'll be no big deal. The positives here are many - she'll appreciate your confidence, her FRIENDS will appreciate your confidence, and you'll feel good about yourself for being the man.

You can't go with her. You'll be a third wheel and look like a dbag.

Also Boston DJ is right in that you will most certainly be banging her in the end of the night, especially if you went out with your friends and were acting cool not calling her 100 times declaring ypur jelaousy.

Just be cool with it, it's all normal behaviour from her side and doesn't have anything to do with her wanting to be single or do anything with other guys. She just want to have some fun with her friends.
Don't you ever feel the need of hanging out with your friends? You should, it's healthy.

 

[Willis]

dont go with her, i been with my chick4 a year and and four months and everytime she wanted 2 go i jus let her and i shows that u arent insecure about her being around other dwarfs and sh!t
.....its funny because everytime my chick goes she comes back home and tell me how some herb try got get her number.

 

[pipe007]

thanx for the feedback guys i really appreciate... i think that once u get comfortable in a relationship.. u kind of let go and forget a bit about the principles of the game..... anyways yea.. its a great oportunity to show my trust and confidence in her by letting her go out with her friends and i can do go ahead and go out with my buddies too

i just needed to remind myself to never act jealous or insecure in front of her... its something im learning to deal with... but thanks

 

[basbhat]

Bah, Next the hor. If I were in an exclusive LTR with a girl and she felt the urge to go grind on a bunch of strangers, I'd read "LOW INTEREST LEVEL" and move on. No point in being in an (exclusive) relationship with a low-interest girl. Seriously man.

If she were just going out with her friends and having fun that would be one thing, but wtf do you think the purpose of a club is? The majority of modern dancing is little different from sex with clothes on. If you want to keep sexing this girl that's one thing, but have a little more respect for yourself. If she doesn't want to be exclusive with you, why do you want to be exclusive with her?

Of course, I'm tempted to agree with all the previous posters in this thread (that you should just be cool with it), but it's only for one reason: There's a good chance your girl won't go home and have a ONS with some other guy. But the very fact that she seems to be searching for such horishness is a bad sign.

Obsidian has a great point. As you get older and you become "serious" about your relationships, allowing a girl going out to a CLUB with her friends(all females) doesn't spell "trust". It more than likely shows that you are denying your desire to have her act like the girlfriend you seriously want. And at this point...if she can't respect that you are the MAN...don't let the door hit you on the way out!

When we are in our late teens and early twenties, we shouldn't really expect to truly understand concepts such as loyalty and respect. When you go through these wishy-washy times in your earlier years, you come to apprectiate these things and can THEN use them as your foundations of standard and strength.

If you can see that some women(and men) don't and could care less about what real trust is(which is really just in our heads...it's inner contentment) when they are young, you can understand how much seriousness to have in considering your situation.

If she wants to go to a club with her friends, then she is probably still in seeking mode....read: she will put her desire over the trust of the relationship!

 

[strong like bull]

how old are you and your girl...?

i went through my party stage when i was a bit younger. i had a ton of fun, got my share of hot ass and had a lot of irresponsible nights. and id regret it if i hadnt done it. i kept myself single and lived like a rock star. from 17 right past my 21st birth the motto me and my bros had was "Stories for the Grandkids!"

crazy times that you could laugh about when youre an old man.

but here i am at 22 and the club scene just really doesnt do anything for me anymore. not just visited, but i worked at a couple of the hottest bars in town. day after day i saw all kinds of crazy, sleazy, dramatic, booze and drug induced things. for a while it was fun but eventually i got to a point where i wondered what else there is to life. there has to be more to it than gettin' drunk and hookin' up with random people.

i could do to a party or club with my girlfriend and have some drinks and have a blast... but goin to the clubs without eachother is different. every once in a while theres gonna be a bachelorette party, girls birthday, buddies about to get married, and yeah one of you will go to that kind of party without eachother. once in a while. and thats cool.

but after working in that industry for so long and seeing everything ive seen... i cant trust a girl who REGULARLY puts herself in those situations. i agree with the above posters in that if someone is frequently hitting up the club scene, they are seeking something outside of whatever relationship they have. ive seen girlfriends, moms, married women make out and even hookup with random guys at the drop of the hat.

NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM A GIRL WHO GOES TO THE BARS/CLUBS/HOUSE PARTIES ON A REGULAR BASIS WITHOUT HER MAN. AND VICE VERSA. NOTHING.

i wont even date those kind of girls anymore. i take my girl hiking, offroading, lots of fun, exciting, different outdoor things. camping, cooking for eachother, things like that. she loves it and i love her for that. im always down for shootin' pool and havin beers with my friends but im just not really into being at the club without my girl.

and i wont waste my time on a girl who doesnt feel the same way. theres too many beautiful girls out there to settle for someone who doesnt match your style. whatever it may be.

-SLB

 

[Dark Chivalry]

It's all about how she acts. Does she get drunk, come home real late and/or grind on strangers or is she a lady? Does she spread her legs easily or has she always been able to reject good offers to be loyal?

By the sound of it, she does not go frequently anyway.

 

[rjones]

I dont see the big deal about her going to a club with her friends. You guys make it sound like every girl in a club is there to **** some guy. Whenever I go to clubs I always see a group of girls that just dance together and if any guys approach they get rejected.