This deffinatly shows that she trusts you alot if she hasn't told anyone else. It could be some malicious lie but who knows. You cannot judge someone by they're past anyway. Alot of us used to be AFCs, we changed now. Would you like it if you told someone about a girl that you were to scared to approach and they dumped you because of it. If it doesn't reflect on her behaviour now then its nothing. Hope I helped.
My gf had an abortion in the past.....what does that say about her?
- Thread starter xenopus
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Sterling the Runner
Don Juan
Great Post Giovanni!!!!
Gangster Of Love
Master Don Juan
Yup. The sad truth is that people who feel like bunny boy, are the ones that are showing up at the polls during elections and will ruin our country.
Gio, great response. Haha.
Henopus, judge her on her personality qualities, not on something she did in the past. That might have been one of the most responsible decision she's ever made. I work in the public school system. Most trouble kids, are starved for attention because raised by parents who were obvsiously not fit to have children at the time they decided to keep them.
And for the rest of you who think your woman hasn't done things you'll never know, a lot of women have had abortions and other things you wouldn't believe, yet you will never know. Many of you have girlfriends with a lot of baggage, who are sleeping with other men, etc.
If any guy decides not to get involved with somebody like that, more power to him. If you are looking to "judge" the quality of the woman, or person, you gotta look at the overall picture. That situation is just a fraction of the whole pie.
I would applaud her for being open and honest with you. Don't let that ruin what you got together. The real questions are, is your life better because she's part of it? Does she bring something to the table. She already had the guts to go through something that was painful emotionally.
Gio, great response. Haha.
Henopus, judge her on her personality qualities, not on something she did in the past. That might have been one of the most responsible decision she's ever made. I work in the public school system. Most trouble kids, are starved for attention because raised by parents who were obvsiously not fit to have children at the time they decided to keep them.
And for the rest of you who think your woman hasn't done things you'll never know, a lot of women have had abortions and other things you wouldn't believe, yet you will never know. Many of you have girlfriends with a lot of baggage, who are sleeping with other men, etc.
If any guy decides not to get involved with somebody like that, more power to him. If you are looking to "judge" the quality of the woman, or person, you gotta look at the overall picture. That situation is just a fraction of the whole pie.
I would applaud her for being open and honest with you. Don't let that ruin what you got together. The real questions are, is your life better because she's part of it? Does she bring something to the table. She already had the guts to go through something that was painful emotionally.
Gangster, I couldn't agree more on the fact that many, many people (women) have things going on that we will never know about..
Humans are dogs, lets face it. An abortion is nothing compared to what people do in private or secret.
We should conduct 100% DNA testing in some small town and see just who is related to whom... the results would be shocking, I am sure.
I don't know if I would want a relationship with a girl who had an abortion, as she may have mental issues, but the abortion was probably the right thing to do considering all circumstances. Having unwanted children is what ruins young women and turns them into welfare mothers
Dietzcoi
Humans are dogs, lets face it. An abortion is nothing compared to what people do in private or secret.
We should conduct 100% DNA testing in some small town and see just who is related to whom... the results would be shocking, I am sure.
I don't know if I would want a relationship with a girl who had an abortion, as she may have mental issues, but the abortion was probably the right thing to do considering all circumstances. Having unwanted children is what ruins young women and turns them into welfare mothers
Dietzcoi
moonman53376
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Originally posted by Fatality
I was reading my local newspaper the other day and a young kid was p!ss!ng about on his farm by some stream when he came across a black binbag. He opened it and it was full of cats and cobs of corn! 5 dead cats. Drowned cats.
I hate cats, dogs fvcuking rule.
Abortion is a sticky issue (sorry for the inappropriate imagery). Do pro-life campaigners think the foetus should not be terminated if it was conceived out of rape? What emotions would she feel then? looking at a child you should love but hating it at the same time.
Its a tough one to call. She is a complete ***** and should be clubbed if she terminated it because of a 'lifestyle choice'. Talk it out with her maybe, perhaps find out if it was a raping.
haha.
I was reading my local newspaper the other day and a young kid was p!ss!ng about on his farm by some stream when he came across a black binbag. He opened it and it was full of cats and cobs of corn! 5 dead cats. Drowned cats.
I hate cats, dogs fvcuking rule.
Abortion is a sticky issue (sorry for the inappropriate imagery). Do pro-life campaigners think the foetus should not be terminated if it was conceived out of rape? What emotions would she feel then? looking at a child you should love but hating it at the same time.
Its a tough one to call. She is a complete ***** and should be clubbed if she terminated it because of a 'lifestyle choice'. Talk it out with her maybe, perhaps find out if it was a raping.
Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Frank Zappa
Senior Don Juan
Regardless of your stance on abortion... an abortion shows that a woman cares more about herself and making her life easy and comfortable more than anything else.
These women are selfish and only care about themselves... But that's pretty self-explanatory.
~Zappa
dj2l8
Don Juan
I think this is the rare occasion on the DJ forum when it's perfectly reasonable to ignore those who have been in the 18 and over world for less than 3 or 4 years.
During the course of your life, you will probably meet more than a few women who have had abortions. Each one will probably tell you that it was one of the most painful decisions they ever had to make. Some think they did the right thing, others aren't so sure.
I haven't met one woman who did this casually unlike some thumpers would have you believe.
They're enough broke-ass unprepared parents out there to keep the GA checks flowing like water. Be a parent when you're prepared to be a parent for god sakes. and keep those jim-hats handy.
I truly hope that when Zappa and PHAT Rabbit go 'the one' on some girl, they'll post the story after she tells them she's had an abortion. Because IT WILL HAPPEN, especially if they continue to DJ though their 20's.
Gio, brilliant, just brillant..
Frank Zappa
Senior Don Juan
Nobody said that it was an easy decision to make... I have known several women who have made this decision...
Everybody's argument seems to hone in on the extreme cases.
What if she's unfit to raise a child? What if she's not ready economically?
Departing from these extreme examples, what about the women from well-to-do families, or the women who are capable of raising the child and chose not to... Sure... there are exceptions to every rule, ie rape, or someone truly too incapable of raising the child.
But what about the ones that were capable, but just didn't... Because, yes, the ones that chose to abort without having a dire reason lack character. Politics aside, in terms of choosing women, it is a redlight and a risk factor.
You can disregard my opinion due to my age, but I have more experience on this topic than you will ever imagine.
~Zappa
Everybody's argument seems to hone in on the extreme cases.
What if she's unfit to raise a child? What if she's not ready economically?
Departing from these extreme examples, what about the women from well-to-do families, or the women who are capable of raising the child and chose not to... Sure... there are exceptions to every rule, ie rape, or someone truly too incapable of raising the child.
But what about the ones that were capable, but just didn't... Because, yes, the ones that chose to abort without having a dire reason lack character. Politics aside, in terms of choosing women, it is a redlight and a risk factor.
You can disregard my opinion due to my age, but I have more experience on this topic than you will ever imagine.
~Zappa
The main arguement is that woman should have the choice to choose.
Man.. if you all ****ed a girl and she got pregnant, you're saying she shouldn't have an abortion, despite the fact that she doesn't want a baby.
What if you got a few girls pregnant? You want to pay all that child care?
Man.. if you all ****ed a girl and she got pregnant, you're saying she shouldn't have an abortion, despite the fact that she doesn't want a baby.
What if you got a few girls pregnant? You want to pay all that child care?
moonman53376
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rape?
a kid conceived out of rape?
is that woman being selfish then?
surely not?
a kid conceived out of rape?
is that woman being selfish then?
surely not?
Well with great hesitation I post my recent story which I have PM'ed someone about and also talked to a few friends about because it really bothered me. I hated to even mention it, because that violates her trust, but they don't know her so it is OK for now at least.
I was recently told by a girl that she had multiple abortions.
I strongly believe that abortion is wrong. I am very conflicted about this girl who I previously really liked. Actually I still really like her, but it was hard to hear.
As a Christian, I will treat her well. I know I can do nothing about the mistakes she made in the past. It doesn't make me feel great to know about it. But since she told me this in confidence I know that she felt like I needed to know about it.
In the end all one can do is pray and follow their faith. If you believe that people can be changed and be saved, then go for it. I hope this is the case for her.
I have made the initial decision to keep dating her. This is difficult because there are some other girls that I could start dating as well. I like who this woman is now and that is what matters to me at the moment because there is nothing I can do to change her past.
I was recently told by a girl that she had multiple abortions.
I strongly believe that abortion is wrong. I am very conflicted about this girl who I previously really liked. Actually I still really like her, but it was hard to hear.
As a Christian, I will treat her well. I know I can do nothing about the mistakes she made in the past. It doesn't make me feel great to know about it. But since she told me this in confidence I know that she felt like I needed to know about it.
In the end all one can do is pray and follow their faith. If you believe that people can be changed and be saved, then go for it. I hope this is the case for her.
I have made the initial decision to keep dating her. This is difficult because there are some other girls that I could start dating as well. I like who this woman is now and that is what matters to me at the moment because there is nothing I can do to change her past.
Giovanni Casanova
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Objection overruled.
diplomatic_lie
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It says she had sex, you dumb dumb.
Look I'm not trying to push my beliefs on anyone else, no matter how strong my beliefs are.
I am however admitting I am conflicted about this. It certainly was a huge red flag for me because of what I believe.
I want my decision on how to handle this to be based on what is best for her, not what is convenient for me. Treating her with respect and not being judgemental are all I can do for her. She can't change what she did.
Now if the thought of her past remains to be too much for me, I will just move on.
These aren't easy types of topics like "What type of shirt should I wear to the dance club" or other airhead topics. I think these are the real topics that require some thought and discussion.
I am however admitting I am conflicted about this. It certainly was a huge red flag for me because of what I believe.
I want my decision on how to handle this to be based on what is best for her, not what is convenient for me. Treating her with respect and not being judgemental are all I can do for her. She can't change what she did.
Now if the thought of her past remains to be too much for me, I will just move on.
These aren't easy types of topics like "What type of shirt should I wear to the dance club" or other airhead topics. I think these are the real topics that require some thought and discussion.
Desdinova
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In my opinion, one abortion isn't a cause for alarm. It's a very emotional thing for a woman to go through one. I have no problems with a woman who has learned something from their abortion. Now, if a woman has had many abortions, she hasn't learned a damn thing and is probably emotionless when it comes to the death of a human being. That is a big red flag.
A woman who learns lessons the hard way is much better than a woman who learns nothing.
A woman who learns lessons the hard way is much better than a woman who learns nothing.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
It sounds like you are having a hard time accepting her past, move on. If you can not accept the decicions she made in the past that did not effect you in any way, would you really expect to be able to easily accept any decisions that would effect you in the future?
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NewMan
Master Don Juan
Abortion is quite often not a difficult decision.
I have meet a number of women who have had abortions - and to all of these the decision was an easy one.
One of my good friends was dating a guy that turned out to be a storker. He was the jealous type who would go off of the handle if she even talked to another guy.
On one accasion he occused her of flerting with some guy when he was accross the room from them - she had not even talked to him or approached him.
After a number of situations like this - she decieded to leave him.
That when he would call 20 times a day.
Sit outside her house in his car.
Follow her.
she found out she was pregenant.
She got an obortion.
It was an easy decision for her.
She wants to get married - she doesn';t want children out of marrage.
Birth control is not 100% effective.
Some people would call her selfish - I would to. But noone should feel bad for being selfish. We are all selfish. There is no act that is not a selfish act.
She was honest with you.
That is a rare trait.
I don't pretend that it is easy for you to deal with this. I know, when an old GF of mine told me that she had gotten pregenant and had an abortion - it was not easy for me to come to terms with. The thought that another man got her pregenant.... that I beleive was one of the facts that ended our relationship.
But - at least she has the honesty to tell me early in the relationship.
Another ex GF of mine had 3 abortions before I had meet her. She never told me until after our relationship.
Respect her for telling you.
and remember - if she had had that kid, you probably would have never meet her.
I have meet a number of women who have had abortions - and to all of these the decision was an easy one.
One of my good friends was dating a guy that turned out to be a storker. He was the jealous type who would go off of the handle if she even talked to another guy.
On one accasion he occused her of flerting with some guy when he was accross the room from them - she had not even talked to him or approached him.
After a number of situations like this - she decieded to leave him.
That when he would call 20 times a day.
Sit outside her house in his car.
Follow her.
she found out she was pregenant.
She got an obortion.
It was an easy decision for her.
She wants to get married - she doesn';t want children out of marrage.
Birth control is not 100% effective.
Some people would call her selfish - I would to. But noone should feel bad for being selfish. We are all selfish. There is no act that is not a selfish act.
She was honest with you.
That is a rare trait.
I don't pretend that it is easy for you to deal with this. I know, when an old GF of mine told me that she had gotten pregenant and had an abortion - it was not easy for me to come to terms with. The thought that another man got her pregenant.... that I beleive was one of the facts that ended our relationship.
But - at least she has the honesty to tell me early in the relationship.
Another ex GF of mine had 3 abortions before I had meet her. She never told me until after our relationship.
Respect her for telling you.
and remember - if she had had that kid, you probably would have never meet her.
It doesn't matter how good-looking you are, how romantic you are, how funny you are... or anything else. If she doesn't have something INVESTED in you and the relationship, preferably quite a LOT invested, she'll dump you, without even the slightest hesitation, as soon as someone a little more "interesting" comes along.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.