My gf apologized to her ex

[topmanbarry]

Is this a red flag? My gf and I were talking abiut Her relationship with Her ex of 8 months and she realized how manipulative she was to him . Things with her family was really bad and she said that she used him as a comfort blanket and someone to be there for her when Noone else wanted to be .She sent a long paragraph about how she is sorry for everything . I don't know if this is disrespectful or if I am overreacting .

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Take what she says with a grain of salt, and move cautiously. He is occupying her mind and THAT is the essence of getting a girl to like you, even if she has hateful thoughts towards you at first....

Be careful.

 

[Fireballs]

How long have you been together?

 

[way2smart]

He is definitely on her mind, maybe more so than you are.

 

[topmanbarry]

How long have you been together?

6 months.

 

[redbaron5]

I would be more concerned about the fact she is admitting to being a manipulative user of people than worrying about her messaging her exbf.

 

[Fred1234567]

Vote Fred Thompson 2016 for president. He's the best.

 

[zekko]

I would be more concerned about the fact she is admitting to being a manipulative user of people than worrying about her messaging her exbf.

I agree with this.

I wouldn't sweat the apologizing to the ex-boyfriend in and of itself - unless it was mixed with other warning signs.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

Why did you bring up her ex in the first place??? The fact you care means you are insecure and its showing to her.

 

[Fireballs]

6 months.

I don't think it was disrespectful. Your girlfriend needed closure and sending that text to him has given it to her.

However, be weary of how she is treating you.

 

[chuck-101]

Hedge you dealings with her and still meet other women. It's an orange flag, but still a slight concern. But far as she knows, you can care less because she's luck to be with you. Don't mention to her this concerns you.

 

[The Duke]

A lot of times therapist will recommend the one in counseling apologize to an ex as a means to get past what is bothering them. I wouldn't worry too much about it, however the fact that she was a manipulator will remain. And someday you might be on the receiving end of that. Perhaps you have helped her understand some of her manipulative ways? What has brought this to the surface for her?

 

[sylvester the cat]

Um. Yes. It is a HUGE red flag. Manipulative? Keeping in touch with exes? This would break the boundary code stipulated upon becoming exclusive. Grounds for termination of contract/relationship.

 

[GS750]

Agreed. Keeping in touch with exes is always a big red flag. Don't care how she rationalizes it. He's on her mind. Why?

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Yeah 6 months in & she's pulling this sh*t. Anytime a woman starts sabotaging a relationship it's the biggest red flag IMO. This usually doesn't stop......make note OP.

I hear what PAIRS saying that does makes sense, just judge her off her actions towards you OP.

 

[MillionBillionaire]

A woman... showing remorse and "just wanting some closure.." BUAHAHAHAHAH HAHAHHA BUHAHAHAH times infinity billion.

Yeah right. Yes it's a red flag.

Caps for emphasis.

 

[LiveFreeX]

Dump her, she shouldn't be talking to another guy, its disrespectful to you.

Your game is weak.

 

[mangotot]

How do you know you if you are being used as a blanket too? This is the thing with women. They could very easily go and find a guy to provide comfort while many men in similar situation are totally on their own. With no support whatsoever and relying solely on their own resources.

 

[topmanbarry]

She tells me that she loves him as a friend because he waa there for her in her depressive state

 

[zekko]

She tells me that she loves him as a friend because he waa there for her in her depressive state

This sounds like she is having trouble moving on from him.