My friend always out talks me and knows how to be the center of attention

trojanman88

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My friend always out talks me and knows how to be the center of attention. I dont know how to act when im around him cuz he sucks all the attention to himself. All the gurls that like me ussually end up likin him too. He is extremely funny and knows how to play around with girls . I guess i dont know how to be the center of attention ussually I dont want to be it.
 

Juan_Man

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Be the quiet, mysterious one. Eventually, his big mouth will mess up his game.
 

SharinganUser

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Just be more confident in yourself, and don't be an insecure about not being the centre of attention. You need to learn your style of getting girls, it clearly isn't the way he does it. Just sit back, relax, and have a good time.

He is successful because he is being himself. If you copy him, you will just be entertaining people and not communicating.

Me, personally, I am not the center of attention either, but when I just sit back and relax, I usually get the girl to come to me ask me why I am not enjoying myself.


My point is, who cares? His style is his style and your style is your style.
 

thesynergist

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Juan_Man said:
Be the quiet, mysterious one. Eventually, his big mouth will mess up his game.
i've gotta completely disagree with you here.

the "guiet, mysterious one." is also typically the "quiet, mysteriously masturbating one."

you talk to girls, you pick up girls. you sit in the corner and try to look freakin' mysterious while some buddy of yours with greater self-mastery talks to all the chicks and before you know it he'll be getting dragged into a bed by some HB while you order a pizza to munch while you play 360.
 

gsxtreme1987

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thesynergist said:
i've gotta completely disagree with you here.

the "guiet, mysterious one." is also typically the "quiet, mysteriously masturbating one."

you talk to girls, you pick up girls. you sit in the corner and try to look freakin' mysterious while some buddy of yours with greater self-mastery talks to all the chicks and before you know it he'll be getting dragged into a bed by some HB while you order a pizza to munch while you play 360.

I agree.. sitting in a corner aint gonna get u jack ****. You need to get up and take control.
 

Juan_Man

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thesynergist said:
i've gotta completely disagree with you here.

the "guiet, mysterious one." is also typically the "quiet, mysteriously masturbating one."

you talk to girls, you pick up girls. you sit in the corner and try to look freakin' mysterious while some buddy of yours with greater self-mastery talks to all the chicks and before you know it he'll be getting dragged into a bed by some HB while you order a pizza to munch while you play 360.
I would have to disagree. I didn't say be completely antisocial. You should just speak whenever you feel it's necessary. This guy's friend has a shtick that will get old after a while. Afterwards, the girls will be looking in your direction.
 

kdnash82

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I have the same problem. My best friend always out talks me. If I opened to a group of girls and bring him in, he always ends up taking over the conversation and taking the better looking one. It bugs me even more that he's married and only talking to them just to be talking. I've pointed it out many times, but it didn't do any good. He'd simply laugh it off and say that I'm not being interesting enough to the girls.

My fix for this situation was to stay away from him. If he opens a group, I'll entertain them for a little while, but eventually end up leaving. I create my own groups. I become the center of attention to other groups. In turn this gives me the opportunity to close with both my group and his. At the same time this makes him call me on the cell and ask me where I'm at.

Basically distance yourself from what he's doing. Going against popular belief, you don't need a wingman to talk to girls. I've made it apart of my routine. I go out in big groups but eventually distance myself from the group pretty much doing my own thing. People will look at you as a person who can have fun by himself and in turn make his own fun. There are other ways to gain social proof other than having friends by your side at all times. Just like you want to get that girl alone, you need to be alone. By my friend calling my cell he's giving me social proof. I'm needed in other areas. Excuse yourself and come back to them at a later time.
 

thesynergist

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Kev07 said:
i'm usually the center of attention, until one of my friend shows up, he completely takes the spotlight. i hate it.
jesus...

ok...

i'm not being critical of YOU PERSONALLY, but i gotta be critical of this SITUATION.

there are two things i can think of that will fix this ridiculous problem.

1) TALK TO YOUR FREAKIN' FRIEND! he's your boy, right? i can't think of a single imaginable reason you couldn't just say, "hey man...you mind if we cooperate so i can get some tail too?", or, "you seem good at getting laid. Pointers?", or any imaginable reason he'd decline either offer (and if he did, pi55 on im'.).

2) GET BETTER AT SARGING! look at this dude as a challenge. hone yourself until you blow HIM outta sets.

either way...the problem dissapears. this really is a simply fix man.
 

Kev07

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sorry dude, you misunderstood me.

he is a complete afc.

he just happens to be the center of attention in groups. however, his other afc atributes pretty much make girls think of him as "oh hes so funny! such a good friend"

whenever im with this guy, im not looking for girls to hit on, it's usually just go out and chill. and if i DID go sarging, he would probably be quiet and after im done say something like "oooh so you're ap imp now huh?!" hes only center of attention around people hes comfortable with
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

thesynergist

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Kev07 said:
sorry dude, you misunderstood me.

he is a complete afc.

he just happens to be the center of attention in groups. however, his other afc atributes pretty much make girls think of him as "oh hes so funny! such a good friend"

whenever im with this guy, im not looking for girls to hit on, it's usually just go out and chill. and if i DID go sarging, he would probably be quiet and after im done say something like "oooh so you're ap imp now huh?!" hes only center of attention around people hes comfortable with
ah! i actually meant to quote the thread poster-my response was for trojanman. my bad.

you did however say in your post (Kev07), that "i hate it."-referring to your AFC friend's attention whoring, but also say your "not looking for girls to hit on" when you're with him. i just don't quite get why you "hate it".



also,

WHEN DID ASPIRING DJ'S START ALSO BEING ATTENTION WH0R3S???? YEAH, YOU WANNA BE THE MAN, BUT THAT'S TOUGH TO DO WHEN YOUR PANTIES ARE IN A BUNCH OVER SOME NON-EXISTANT PROBLEM. WTF???

hadta vent. hadta...
 

The Forms

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I'm usually the center of attention guy, but some of my friends outtalk me too in some situations.

How I deal with it is I let them shine. I let them do their thing, but I don't completely drop out. If he gets quantity, you get quality. He's talking all the time, so when you chime in, make it count.

When I'm with those types of friends I just chime in with something hilarious that he can't top. You don't have to be the center all the time. It works out for both of us when that happens.

My old roommate was the best DJ I ever met. I learned so much more from him that I ever did from this site.

When me and him were out I was always the center. But he'd just find the one girl he wanted to talk to, and talk to her on the side. Made it kind of private between the two of them while still among the rest of us.

Then he'd pull her away from the rest of the group and have it just them. Which is better anyway. DJing the whole group is rad, but you have to home in on one chick, right?

So, being the center of attention is cool and all, but really you should be looking to the be center of ONE GIRL'S attention more than anything else.
 

Charm

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Surround yourself with people that are like the way you want to be.
 

trojanman88

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My friend is an aspiring comedian who is so funny that no matter what everyone wants to be his buddy. He knows how to stay cool and be funny at the same time which is hard too do. But what makes him really good with girls is his ability to take over any situation and make anybody laugh. Laughter is trully the key to a womans heart but you gotta find the right amount of downto earth manly "coolness" to balance it out with women. And my friend defineatly has that down pact. He used to not be able to get gurls cuz of his looks and he would always go overboard with the jokes but now that we are seniors and he has hung around me enough he has toned it down and he has solid game. He knows about kino and stuff like that from me and now he is prolly the best I have seen in action period. This dude knows what he is down no afc. He can prolly get any gurl in our school hands down. But he is in a serious relationship he gets sex whenever he wants and everything (but he recently stopped trying with other cuz he doesnt like to cheat on gurls). But me and him are pretty much up there, me and him brought each others game up so significantly that nobody can get a gurl over either one of us. But He defineatly is a little better than me because he keeps the energy goin so now all I do is study comedy and im starting to close the gap.
 

Jay Jay

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The Forms got it right.

Isolate.

I'm the guy who is the centre of attention. While I was holding court my best friend (before he settled down) would be leading his target away and getting physical.

JJ
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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