my ex's best friend

[SoCalMike]

Has anyone ever been able to pull an ex's good friend?

I realize it's probably more trouble than it's worth. But I'm curious to see if anyone has tried it and what the results were.

 

[jophil28]

Has anyone ever been able to pull an ex's good friend?

I realize it's probably more trouble than it's worth. But I'm curious to see if anyone has tried it and what the results were.

Not a good idea -

Even if you establish a FB or LTR with the friend she will always have a high level of loyalty to your ex as a friend . She was your ex's friend before she became your lover.
The friend will always have a high sense of loyalty to your ex and this WILL inevitably compete with her feelings and her loyalty to you as her FB or her SO.
Women are notorious for having scattered loyalties. They NEVER commit to their man above all others, NEVER.
THis scenario is guaranteed to place you in a bad position from time to time. Can you imagine going to a Bar B Que at your ex's house and taking the friend ?

 

[kingwilliam]

I think if you are talking about trying to sleep with the friend then its definitely fun to think about....

LTR? nah

 

[Mr.Positive]

Has anyone ever been able to pull an ex's good friend?

I realize it's probably more trouble than it's worth. But I'm curious to see if anyone has tried it and what the results were.

I almost did, but decided against it.

In my situation, the ex dumped me, and the friend was against it. She thought the ex did something stupid. So we became friends...but she wanted more. It was tempting, but I'm glad I didn't go that route.

I think you have to judge this one on a case by case basis.

 

[SoCalMike]

Thanks for the input guys.

This is a tough one, because normally I wouldn't even go there. But this girl is amazingly intelligent, hot, and we get along great. I know she's attracted to me too, because she used to flirt with me a when I first started dating her friend.

She just recently came out of a LTR too, so she's single but won't be for much longer.

You can see why I'm tempted.

But for now I'm not going to go there. The main reason being these are lifelong friends who have known each other since they were in kindergarten.

Lame how life does this sh!t to you sometimes.... oh well. Suppose I gotta keep reminding myself there are other hot intelligent women out there...

 

[sodbuster]

If she's not worried about it[friendship], I don't know if I'd care. Women always lose friends over man stealing,so if she's "all that', go for it. Who knows- your ex might have given her the green light.

 

[Mr. Me]

for now I'm not going to go there. The main reason being these are lifelong friends who have known each other since they were in kindergarten.

Phuck that!

There's only two things you need to do with this woman

1. Ask her out.

2. Completely and utterly NEVER talk about your ex with her.

Look, if it works out, then she's not gonna look back to her kindergarten friends.

 

[Heretolearn]

Let me know how it goes. Is interesting especially if the girls are close and have the code 'no dating ex's'. Would it improve things if you were friends/got the seal of approval from your ex? Would it be different if you broke up with her?

All in all, in an ideal world you would not do it but just depends on how serious you are about the other. Your life at the end of the day. Good luck?

(probably need input from more experienced people to get an idea of adv. disadvantages of the situation)

 

[NewMan]

I had the opportunity.

My left left the state, and I worked in the same building with her best friend.

We would go out for drinks on Friday after work - with work buddies.

One Friday some people came back to my place to party longer.

She drank to much to drive.

When I went to bed, she followed me in about 10 minutes later.

Bottom line, I woke up with her hands down my boxers.

I turned it down - At the time, I wouldn't have appreciated my ex banging my buddy - so I took the high ground.

 

[backbreaker]

is pvssy really that important guys? I mean come on. this is your friend. Choosing your friend over a soft piece of pinkish colored meat.

 

[Mr. Me]

I wouldn't have appreciated my ex banging my buddy - so I took the high ground.

Here's the difference between that and a situation like SoCalMike's:

YOUR buddy is your buddy through life. Girls will come and go. Girls are not your buddies.

If your buddy hooks up with your ex, deep inside you may not be okay with that, even if she's an ex. You want loyalty from your buddy. You may not like him going after what were your women. Like you wrote: "I wouldn't have appreciated my ex banging my buddy".

When they bust up (as odds are they will), your buddy will still look to be your buddy, but your relationship with your bud may have forever changed because of it.

This isn't the case with your ex's girl friends. That's their issue between them.

Insofar as you're concerned, they're all free agents. They're not your loyal, life long buddies. By not going after the girl friends, you're being loyal to... who? Your EX????

 

[SoCalMike]

Just found out they are going to be roommates. Damn. Now it's pretty much impossible.

Imagine me staying over at her place with my ex in the other room. LOL

Ain't gonna happen. Maybe if things change in the future. I'll report the results if I ever make the move. But it won't be any time soon.

 

[Heretolearn]

Same room = ummmm no lol.

maybe your ex will recommend you though

*would an ex ever do that if she liked the guy but realised they were not going to be together?

 

[Jitterbug]

Just found out they are going to be roommates. Damn. Now it's pretty much impossible.

Imagine me staying over at her place with my ex in the other room. LOL

Ain't gonna happen. Maybe if things change in the future. I'll report the results if I ever make the move. But it won't be any time soon.

Why not??? It's a great challenge, and you only live once!

 

[STR8UP]

Same room = ummmm no lol.

maybe your ex will recommend you though

*would an ex ever do that if she liked the guy but realised they were not going to be together?

One of mine did. Almost to the point of embarrassment. Evidently it was "the best sex she ever had", and she mentioned to a few of her friends right in front of me that they should "try me out". I went out with one of the friends a couple of times but she never did "try me out". Too bad for her....

And this whole "Bro's before ho's" attitude is pretty AFC in most cases. If your "bro" was a MAN he wouldn't be hung up on some chick he banged in the past. Hell, if he was a REAL man he would be giving you a high five.

A good friend of mine is a little sensitive when it comes to this stuff. His ex lives with him (weird, I know), but she started coming on to me, so I said fukk it.

Never managed to hit it, but I had her in my bed a couple of times, and lets just say her hoo-ha was soaking wet....

I basically asked his permission before I moved forward and he said "no prob", but I could tell it bothered him a little. But we're still tight to this day. At least he was man enough to not let some chick come between our friendship.

Really, if you think about it, pining over an ex is the most AFC thing you could possibly do. I know this is a bit off topic, but I say ask your buddy for permission and if he says go for it I would have no guilt.

As for macking an exes friend....hell yea! Who is she to tell you what you can and cant do? I kinda did that with the chick I mentioned above. A bolt of lightning hasn't struck me dead from that heinous act yet.

You guys need to stop taking this whole relationship thing so seriously cause I can assure you that your ex isn't taking it seriously, and if she is it is only to protect her OWN fragile ego. It has nothing to do with you.

 

[NewMan]

Here's the difference between that and a situation like SoCalMike's:

YOUR buddy is your buddy through life. Girls will come and go. Girls are not your buddies.

If your buddy hooks up with your ex, deep inside you may not be okay with that, even if she's an ex. You want loyalty from your buddy. You may not like him going after what were your women. Like you wrote: "I wouldn't have appreciated my ex banging my buddy".

When they bust up (as odds are they will), your buddy will still look to be your buddy, but your relationship with your bud may have forever changed because of it.

This isn't the case with your ex's girl friends. That's their issue between them.

Insofar as you're concerned, they're all free agents. They're not your loyal, life long buddies. By not going after the girl friends, you're being loyal to... who? Your EX????

I guess I have a different set of standards than you - horses for courses.

For me, if my buddy bangs an ex then adios.

At the time, we had been living together for 5 yrs, and I understand the pain that she was going through (both of us) - I still cared for the girl, and I guess thats the difference. There's so much pvssy out there, why would I want to kick her in the b@lls? just for a piece fo a55.

Thats not my style.

 

[backbreaker]

the point is, that you should have so many plates or enough quality plates that friends your girl friends and buddy's gF's and EX's should be like sisters to you.

Regardless of how "hawt" she is or how great she is, it reeks of desperation.

the only time something like this interests you is when you don't have quality plates or enough of them. if you are banging 3 quality women already and they are fighting over you time, you don't have time nor the want to to give a flip about your buddy's EX.

your buddy's EX is the lowest level of dumpster diving.

 

[Mr. Me]

For me, if my buddy bangs an ex then adios.

I feel the same way.

why would I want to kick her in the b@lls?

I guess I don't get how you're kicking her? She's your ex, therefore, you don't have a thing going with her, you have a past history that's over and done with. She's gonna date other guys. You're gonna date other women. You don't owe her a thing. She doesn't owe you. She's not your buddy, her friend is the one that has a current bond with her as her GF. You're not the one "betraying" your ex if you date her GF, it's the GF who is risking her friendship with your ex by dating you, just as your buddy would be risking his friendship with you were he to date your ex.

 

[Jitterbug]

your buddy's EX is the lowest level of dumpster diving.

Read the first post again. It's his EX's buddy, not his buddy's EX.

 

[backbreaker]

Read the first post again. It's his EX's buddy, not his buddy's EX.

oh.. big difference.

SARGE ON!!!:rockon: