my downfall, need advice please

[noobsauve]

hi, everyone i have this problem that has plaguing me for years now and it's solely accounted for my height.

i'm 5'4 which isnt that bad but definitely below average. when i am with a girl one-on-one i can possess the alpha status, confidence, fun loving guy attitude no problem. the minute i am around friends and/or a social gathering i feel two feet tall because everyone is either average or slightly above in the height department and it leaves me feeling neglected (which is not the reality at all)

i've taken notice to how vulnerable this makes me feel if i'm with a girl/girlfriend and with friends, i start losing my confident disposition and let my mind put in thoughts that she's easily going to want to be with one of them rather than me because their height automatically creates a stronger attraction towards her biological conditioning. i start to believe it, become insecure, and start to feel jealous for no reason and i'm sure it leaks through. its sad to admit but i wind up dreading having friends meet a new girl im talking to or taking her out to social events.

any advice to help combat this is greatly appreciated because i know i have no control over my height but it has also led me to be antisocial to avoid feeling so low status.

 

[puma183]

I have a shorter height buddy, about your height, who keeps himself extremely fit. He is also really into marshall arts. He became so advanced over the years, he brought a self-defence for women course into our town. His female students adore him. He is always dating good looking women. Conversely I have a lot of taller clueless friends, who don't have any of his success, neither with women nor money. So it's all about what you do with youself. Yes shorter height puts you in a slight disadvantage, but it's nothing you can't counter with aquisition of: power, wealth, skills, and charms.

As men, we can always upgrade ourselves.

 

[noobsauve]

bump

 

[Atom Smasher]

When it comes to the physical, ALL we men have to do is dress and groom nicely. When we do this and project a confident, friendly attitude, we completely eliminate our physical deficancies and they become INVISIBLE to women. This defies logic, but it is absolutely true. If they perceive a sense of style, they will turn a blind eye toward physical imperfections. Take this one to the bank.

 

[noobsauve]

but how do i get over the mentality issues when im around friends or crowds that lead me to feel insecure?

 

[Feek]

but how do i get over the mentality issues when im around friends or crowds that lead me to feel insecure?

There's a guy where I work that's about your height. He's a very soft-spoken, walk-all-over-me type that also has these issues because he's about the same height as you. After talking to him about it, I've taken under my wing to help him with some of these problems.

I'll tell you what I told him that seemed to help; a majority of the people out there (yes, that includes women - even very attractive ones) just simply don't care about you and your insecurities, much less how tall you are. They have their own insecurities they're worrying about, whether it be their hair, their clothes, or even if they have a bit of lunch stuck in their teeth. If you aren't concerned about it, no one else will notice. Simply put, stop being insecure about your height, and you'll realize there's nothing to be insecure about.

I'm on the low end of the average scale when it comes to height, but I hang out with a lot of guys that are quite tall (to me anyway). I'm also getting to know these guys in a one-on-one type of friendship so when we get out into groups, they know I'm someone to be listened to when I speak. Personally, I create my own charisma, but using this strategy may help you until you're ready to spin your own top. The psychology of it is that, all things being equal, people will more readily listen to the taller guys of the group first. If they're listening to you, so is everyone else. That may be unfair, but nobody ever said life was fair.