My conversation sucks

[sandinista]

hey everyone.
I used to think my conversation skills were really good. With my friends i've always got things to say, i'm funny, & really get on with them.

I don't have much experience with talking to women, but after reading this site & meeting new (male) people i thought that i had this stuff down to a fine art.

But, i had a date last week (my 1st ever!). Nothing fancy. i just invited her to a bar for a drink. While i was there.. i just couldn't think of what to say to her.
After the hellos, the pleasentries, the usual things, i ordered a huge ****tail for us to share. It took a while to make & we were just standing there waiting for it to arrive. i couldn't think of anything to say!!

When we sat down it was better. I remembered to golden rule of talking about her, so i asked her questions about herself & everthing. But this just felt like an interview. It wasn't interesting, just boring old stuff. I occasionally slipped in things about me, but she just looked at me like she didn't care. so i asked her more about her.

We said our goodbyes, & now she isn't replying to my messages.

i need help.

 

[Jippii]

Heya. Have you read the dj bible and weapons of mass seduction?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but sounds like you may have been a bit nervous (maybe in your body language etc too) and she was having a boring time?

 

[Hubris]

I bet you 50 bucks that you aren't too disappointed at the outcome of this date (her not returning your messages).

The reason is... you don't really like her.

Don't worry about the convo, it happens to everyone. A babe at work drove me to a club a little while ago, and we had nothing to talk about. Not a damn thing. It felt silly.

She's hot, but we're miles apart in terms of personality. Thus I'm not particularly interested, thus, we didn't have much to talk about.

 

[sandinista]

well, to be honest i wasn't that interested in her. I only took her out as i had to be out of the house for a while (i owed my landlord money i didn't have), So it was a way to pass the time.

But i treated it as pratice for my woman skills.
I tried the ****y stuff & it tired VERY quickly. I just need some advice on how to have more fun conversations with girls or at least not to have the constant questions i through at her.

 

[DJ_Dork]

If you weren't that interested in her, why'd you leave her messages? Anyways, it's all good, you never really was digging her!

 

[maranathaman]

Sounds like..

Sounds to me like you made a good effort,
but the chick was boring and not into you.
Even if you weren't into her, getting dating practice is good.
Most chicks, if you ask them a question about themselves,
will start blabbing, and you won't be able to get a word-in edgewise!
So if this chick was being a cold-fish,
you are better-off without her anyways!
Now go pay your Rent!

 

[TurboOverCubicInches]

you're doing fine...the fact that you got out there, got her #, then went out on a date,....****....you've already won. whether or not you score with her is icing on the cake. Many guys can't even get to the point you're at. Now, it seems like she had very little IL in you...and since you admit you did not have much in her, don't bother messaging her anymore. move on to the next one to hone your skills some more. It might take a few dates but you gotta do it.

 

[Iguana]

PLUS: it was your first date...

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by sandinista
well, to be honest i wasn't that interested in her. I only took her out as i had to be out of the house for a while (i owed my landlord money i didn't have), So it was a way to pass the time.

But i treated it as pratice for my woman skills.
I tried the ****y stuff & it tired VERY quickly. I just need some advice on how to have more fun conversations with girls or at least not to have the constant questions i through at her.

http://sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=53338

 

[AlwaysExcel]

Hey Playa Supreme, I think you're right on with getting the life story but I'd like to know more. Is there a step by step process you use to get this story out of them? And what kind of questions do you ask? I find that direct questions like, "what are your goals?" don't work so well. I get a lot of "I dunno"s.
Thanks for your help!
BTW, yes I'm being lazy not registering for that other forum.

 

[sandinista]

hey everyone. Thanks for the replys.
But have any of you got any tips or advice to improve my conversation skills. You know, be more fun & playful instead of being formal & 'boring'.