My brother the loser

bob10000

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I need some advice, my brother has been dating this plain looking chunky chick who has one child. He had lost weight (130 pounds) over the last 18 months. He is a decent looking guy, but he has very low self esteem, he cannot carry on a conversation. he has dumped this woman 5 times over the last 4 months, If we go into a club and she is there, he will start talking to her after 2 minutes. After that they are back together again. when he splits with her he tells her that they have nothing in common (except drinking,no sex). When she went to her 10 year class reunion she left him to watch her child. Recently (yesterday) she uses him as a babysitter, and he refuses to tell her NO! He doesn't call friends when he is with her, anyway----has anyone ever encountered someone who is a wimp like this? And do you have any advice? Thanks
 

Kodiac

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Beat him up, shove the bible down his throat, tell him soups the only thing that should come in chunky.

Take him out, introduce him to other ladies. Then take him out some more, avoid the chunky chick at all costs!

Watch the movie "the blob" :rolleyes:
 

Derek Flint

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I have a feeling that chunky looking chick will soon have another child, and someone's brother will be hating life.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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You brother will keep on doing what he is doing until he finds something (or someone) else to fill his time. It does not sound as if he is willing to do that on his own so he will need a little prodding.

Use your DJ skills and take him out of his element. Find a new club to go to. Find new friends to hang out with together. Start talking him up and boosting his ego in front of him. Find a copy of The Player's "Pickup Mission" and build a wing together. Become his teacher and show him the advantages of being a DJ.
 

TesuqueRed

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He lost 130 lbs over 18 months--??? Fvcking-A, that's some work!

Ok--he's heading in the right direction, cut him some slack. He can't fix everything at once. Some days he can work on things, other days he can only limit the damage.

Getting that weight thing under control is an absolute--that's his health, right?

His self-image will take a little while to catch up. This will be a work in progress. If he could do 130 lbs on his own, he'll probably deal with 4.0 overweight user chick when he's ready. I suppose you could direct him to the bible---usually I recommend against that, but for a guy in need of it who has showed he can do some work (130 lbs gone...), he's worth an exception.

If he needs self-assertion work--he can get that in therapy or several good books from amazon (do a search...)
 

ryoshi

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Originally posted by TesuqueRed

His self-image will take a little while to catch up. This will be a work in progress.
I agree completely. I used to be afflicted with something that lowered my self-esteem and even after it's demise it still lingered in my head. I'm now more confident and getting a lot stronger inside. DJ training helps this a lot too. It takes work but I think that he'll come around.

You need to protect and support him and act as an example. Let him see you get the hot chicks and help him get some of them himself. You could make a great team some day.
 

Futurologist

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Originally posted by ryoshi
You need to protect and support him and act as an example. Let him see you get the hot chicks and help him get some of them himself. You could make a great team some day.
There's some great advice here, guys, and I especially like this bit. Get him to see that things would be better off without her, and at the very least not to get too deep into the relationship.

You can start by bringing up the issue about her not taking him to show off her reunion. Was she trying to meet someone else there or what, or just doesn't think their relationship is too serious (yet interestingly enough seems to involve him with her kid)?
 

Julian

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Dude tell him the #1 rule. NO FAT B1TCHES ALLOWED!
 

bob10000

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Hey thanks for the advice, But he is a mess----when he is out with her in a club, he won't speak to me other than hello.
He leans on her like a little kid, his hand never leaves her fat body(even when sitting down). Her best friend is her parents, so that is who they hang out with. I sat with them for 5 minutes and got up and left to talk to some other women, and some of my own friends. When he was single(the few days they were apart). I asked him what interests he had and suggested some things to talk about with other women to get a conversation going (he seemed to get irritated)----- he told me doesn't have any interests. I give up-----I hope she dumps him and tells him off. he deserves it. He's pathetic
 

BobbDobbs

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You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. Let it go, live your own life.
 

ryoshi

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Originally posted by bob10000
when he is out with her in a club, he won't speak to me other than hello.
Go to a different club. Preferably out of town. Don't let him know and make him agree that she cannot join you guys. This is a serious situation. She's dangerous and guys have been known to kill themselves or others over b¡tches like her. You're his brother. You must help him. What goes around comes around.
 

THA REALNESS

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..same exact thing

....but brother MARRIED the *****,has a daughter with her and moved the hoe-bag in with us ,not only that but she's an ******* and completley walks all ova the family and brings her crazy ass family in our business all the time!And u no i ain'tz no punk ,me and my old man have both put cursed her out and put her in her place hundreds of times,but nothing going ,he defends her till kingdom ***,when we all know she's a gold-digger(he's a doctor).:mad:

DO NOT LET HIM DO THIS TO U,OR UR FAMILY,OR MORE IMPORTANTLY 2 HIMSELF,WURK DAY AND NIGHT 2 FIND A WAY 2 MAKE HIM C THE ERROR OF HIS WAYS ,CUZ IF NOT U'LL SUFFER 2 .
 

ryoshi

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Re: ..same exact thing

Originally posted by THA REALNESS
...and completley walks all ova the family and brings her crazy ass family in our business all the time!
You should make her the subject of several practical jokes. They will punk the sh¡t out of her and make it seem as if it's all in good humor. Glue her ass to the toilet!
 
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