My Advice After 2 Decades Dealing With Women

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Figure out what's important to you, and don't back down on it.

If you create a hard line and your woman passes it to spite you, drop her. She doesn't respect you and the disrespect will only get worse in time.

Girl's nights out make you uncomfortable? They should. Women are fickle.

If you get a bad feeling about the way she's been treating you... Something out of the ordinary.., blowing up on you for no reason... treating you like a piece of sh1t...

Drop her. Always trust your gut.

You will find more success by being unabashedly yourself than you will by supplicating. Even if you're an introverted dork. Realizing who you are and becoming confident in it is where you need to be. We can all make changes to improve ouselves, but confidence is key, and there are tricks to improve it...

Keep your head up; contemplative people like us tend to look at the ground. Don't do it when you're in public.

Exaggerate your walk. Make an effort to take wider steps and swing your arms more freely.

Expand your own personal space. When you sit down, intentionally lounge and take up more space.

Make a point of speaking louder than you normally would and don't let others speak over you.

Take pride in your masculinity.

Women will try to change you, that's their nature. Don't let them. Women are attracted to our male traits, for reasons they can't comprehend. If you become more like her, she will lose respect for you.

You have to placate sometimes, but keep it to a minimum. And apologize rarely.

Be a reasonable assh0le.

Less so when dealing with men, though it's still necessary at times.

When dealing with women, you're better off being a d1ck than being a pushover. The woman will hate you more in the moment, but she will love you forever. And she won't know why.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Take pride in your masculinity.

Women will try to change you, that's their nature. Don't let them. Women are attracted to our male traits, for reasons they can't comprehend. If you become more like her, she will lose respect for you.

You have to placate sometimes, but keep it to a minimum. And apologize rarely.

I say, just slap them in the face with the trouser snake whenever they question your masculinity.

 

[Gamisch]

Figure out what's important to you, and don't back down on it.

If you create a hard line and your woman passes it to spite you, drop her. She doesn't respect you and the disrespect will only get worse in time.

Girl's nights out make you uncomfortable? They should. Women are fickle.

If you get a bad feeling about the way she's been treating you... Something out of the ordinary.., blowing up on you for no reason... treating you like a piece of sh1t...

Drop her. Always trust your gut.

You will find more success by being unabashedly yourself than you will by supplicating. Even if you're an introverted dork. Realizing who you are and becoming confident in it is where you need to be. We can all make changes to improve ouselves, but confidence is key, and there are tricks to improve it...

Keep your head up; contemplative people like us tend to look at the ground. Don't do it when you're in public.

Exaggerate your walk. Make an effort to take wider steps and swing your arms more freely.

Expand your own personal space. When you sit down, intentionally lounge and take up more space.

Make a point of speaking louder than you normally would and don't let others speak over you.

Take pride in your masculinity.

Women will try to change you, that's their nature. Don't let them. Women are attracted to our male traits, for reasons they can't comprehend. If you become more like her, she will lose respect for you.

You have to placate sometimes, but keep it to a minimum. And apologize rarely.

Be a reasonable assh0le.

Less so when dealing with men, though it's still necessary at times.

When dealing with women, you're better off being a d1ck than being a pushover. The woman will hate you more in the moment, but she will love you forever. And she won't know why.

I agree with everything except the last part about being a azzhole. But admittedly, my new philosophy is to be a little nicer to people in general and more have more patience .

However, I do agree that the way that SHE might view the outcome of ones action as a typical " azzhole" behavior. Loke you say, when you make a fuzz because she goes on GNO you will also be seen as an azzhole. Basically most pushback will be seen as azzhole behavior anyway . We know that rationally arguing with a woman is a lost of your time and energy and will actually work against a man..

I also agree that you better BE YOU. Twisting and turning and trying to keep her will eventually also result in her walking away from you. Then you are left 1. Without a woman and 2. Without a sense of honour.

 

[SW15]

You can't "Just Be Yourself" if what you are is unappealing to women. "Just Be Yourself" is the typical blue pill ideology advice. If what you are is not working, you need to do the work to change into something more appealing.

 

[eli77]

Love this!!

 

[Learning Curve]

Good stuff.

 

[Smok1nAce]

You can't "Just Be Yourself" if what you are is unappealing to women. "Just Be Yourself" is the typical blue pill ideology advice. If what you are is not working, you need to do the work to change into something more appealing.

NO.

If your a fat slob of a man who enjoys playing videogames, OWN IT. Be confident. The worse thing is being a tool of a man who chases after money and status just to please women. When all is said and done the first man is living the life he wants to live. The second man is putting the P on Pedestal and living his life in accordance to what he thinks woman want.

The self improvement journey has been massively misinterpreted over the last decades to revolve around women when originally it was to build your confidence. Learning game with woman isn't to F more woman its to understand them and be prepared. Your game is the best game. When a woman genuinely likes you almost all "game" taught by your favorite coach is meaningless. If you never experienced a woman's genuine attraction toward you then you'll never get what I'm talking about.

I could go deeper into this but most people cant even get this basic idea.

 

[Solomon]

If you create a hard line and your woman passes it to spite you, drop her. She doesn't respect you and the disrespect will only get worse in time.

If you get a bad feeling about the way she's been treating you... Something out of the ordinary.., blowing up on you for no reason... treating you like a piece of sh1t...

Drop her. Always trust your gut.

These two are huge and underrated. Women always talk about boundaries and consent, and you should have those two as a man as well. To many men are willing to simp in hopes of sniffing some panties. If you have boundaries she will respect them if not she can kick rocks

Also how a woman treats you is indeed true. Once you have been doing this long enough(dating and meeting women etc) you can easily tell if a woman is about to flake or her interest in you is waning for example a girl use to text you all the time, then slowly it trickles down to her texting you once every da non enthuse, typically a sign that she found someone else or you not that interesting to her no more

You can't "Just Be Yourself" if what you are is unappealing to women. "Just Be Yourself" is the typical blue pill ideology advice. If what you are is not working, you need to do the work to change into something more appealing.

I think you should be your best self if you are self-critical in a healthy way and honest every man has something he needs to work on or could improve i.e. you're fat, bad conversationalist, needy etc. If you're man and you have hobbies that may not be popular with women i.e. video games, anime (although younger women are more open to this), fishing, hunting etc. Why would you change that for a woman? I remember when I use to be a Super simp Level 7 (ha ha) I use to try to appease and be "The Perfect Guy" like in rom-com movie, get girls flowers etc. The reality is no one is perfect, and like Pook said perfect is boring. Does this mean you shouldn't get girls flowers? It's not that women don't appreciate romantic gestures it's that I was trying to hard to soon. To many men do simp shyt or thirsty shyt cause they are desperate for validation, poon, affection or all of the above. Once you realize a woman has to earn your attention and affection then you're the one who is actually making her chase you!

The point I agree with you somewhat. Men should strive to be a version of themselves that is their best self but not for women but for themselves to the point that they can attract women just by being them (this may go over slow folks heads). However I'm not gonna change my likes or hobbies just for a woman. If she is vegan and doesn't like that I hunt, boohoo then we are probably not compatible anyway. If I want to watch anime and she doesn't like it, cool she can go home or watch it with me

it is what it is

 

[SW15]

I think you should be your best self...Men should strive to be a version of themselves that is their best self but not for women but for themselves to the point that they can attract women just by being them (this may go over slow folks heads).

I agree with this.

if you are self-critical in a healthy way and honest every man has something he needs to work on or could improve i.e. you're fat, bad conversationalist, needy etc.

I also agree with this.

If you're man and you have hobbies that may not be popular with women i.e. video games, anime (although younger women are more open to this), fishing, hunting etc. Why would you change that for a woman?

Not all hobbies are created equal. A man who is into fishing or hunting (most women aren't into these) is better positioned to impress women than a video game or anime nerd. In both cases, the woman isn't into the hobbies but fishing and hunting have a better reputation and are more closely associated with alpha and sigma type males.

I'm not gonna change my likes or hobbies just for a woman. If she is vegan and doesn't like that I hunt, boohoo then we are probably not compatible anyway. If I want to watch anime and she doesn't like it, cool she can go home or watch it with me

I don't think a man who hunts or fishes is going to want to change those hobbies for a woman. I am aware of an outlier story from my social connections where a hunter had a ~10 year long relationship with a vegetarian woman. The relationship did end in a childless divorce.

 

[nismo-4]

NO.

If your a fat slob of a man who enjoys playing videogames, OWN IT. Be confident. The worse thing is being a tool of a man who chases after money and status just to please women. When all is said and done the first man is living the life he wants to live. The second man is putting the P on Pedestal and living his life in accordance to what he thinks woman want.

The self improvement journey has been massively misinterpreted over the last decades to revolve around women when originally it was to build your confidence. Learning game with woman isn't to F more woman its to understand them and be prepared. Your game is the best game. When a woman genuinely likes you almost all "game" taught by your favorite coach is meaningless. If you never experienced a woman's genuine attraction toward you then you'll never get what I'm talking about.

I could go deeper into this but most people cant even get this basic idea.

Give that fat slob 3 million dollars, a Lamborghini, a RR Cullinan (to haul his new TV and Playstation 5) an IG with a blue check plus 100k followers, and a penthouse. I guarantee he'll enjoy sex with real women while he plays Halo, Fortnite, and Minecraft. Much better than whacking it to Lara Croft playing Tomb Raider.

 

[BadBoy89]

You can't "Just Be Yourself" if what you are is unappealing to women. "Just Be Yourself" is the typical blue pill ideology advice. If what you are is not working, you need to do the work to change into something more appealing.

There is disconnect between what "Just Be Yourself" Means.

I think "Just Be Yourself" means not changing or acting different specifically for one woman; and acting logically and normally and respecting yourself.

I don't think it means "if you are fat slob and plays video games, keep doing that. She should be attracted because you are yourself.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

You can't "Just Be Yourself" if what you are is unappealing to women. "Just Be Yourself" is the typical blue pill ideology advice. If what you are is not working, you need to do the work to change into something more appealing.

I may have left that vague, but it makes perfect sense to me when I read it.

You will find more success by being a dork who's comfortable in his own shoes than you will by being a pretender. Internalizing the correct mindset is the most difficult thing to do, and that's what game is to me...a mindset.

Game is being confident in yourself at all times, and naturally expressing it in your interactions with women.

Sure, you can pretend to be something you're not, and that might get you laid, but it will never leave you satisfied. You will never feel complete, because deep down you will know you aren't being true to yourself, and that the woman doesn't love you for YOU.

If all you want is to get laid, there are easier ways than becoming a good actor.

 

[SW15]

Game is being confident in yourself at all times, and naturally expressing it in your interactions with women.

This is a good mindset but it has its limits. I'll compare 2 men who might be outliers.

Man 1 is 5'10", overweight, has a neckbeard, and acne. He enjoys playing video games and eating processed foods. He is supremely confident in his own self image as an overweight neckbeard with acne. Even though he might have a good mindset, women are not going to find him appealing based on his looks. Remember that attraction and seduction are about looks, money, status, and personality. This man is weak on looks and it is doubtful his personality will be enough to overcome deficiencies in his looks.

Man 2 is 6'2" and 185 lbs. His BMI is in the normal range, his body fat is around 11-15%, he has good definition in his abdominals and his arms have good muscle mass (his arms aren't huge at that weight though). He isn't as confident in himself as Man 1 for some reason. Perhaps he had some psychological trauma. Man 2 is going to attract more women with a less than ideal mindset because of his looks. As long as he isn't a porn addicted, chronic masturbator, he'll have enough of a personality to attract women. It is doubtful that this man would be a chronic masturbator because he will get enough IOIs from women to have enough options where he wouldn't feel the need to sedate himself in pornography and masturbation.

Man 2 will get IOIs when he goes to his gym and he won't need to do much to set dates at his gym. He won't need to show much personality on his nightlife venue approaches either. His height + physique are enough to carry him at a nightlife venue with average facial aesthetics.

 

[Solomon]

This is a good mindset but it has its limits. I'll compare 2 men who might be outliers.

Man 1 is 5'10", overweight, has a neckbeard, and acne. He enjoys playing video games and eating processed foods. He is supremely confident in his own self image as an overweight neckbeard with acne. Even though he might have a good mindset, women are not going to find him appealing based on his looks. Remember that attraction and seduction are about looks, money, status, and personality. This man is weak on looks and it is doubtful his personality will be enough to overcome deficiencies in his looks.

Man 2 is 6'2" and 185 lbs. His BMI is in the normal range, his body fat is around 11-15%, he has good definition in his abdominals and his arms have good muscle mass (his arms aren't huge at that weight though). He isn't as confident in himself as Man 1 for some reason. Perhaps he had some psychological trauma. Man 2 is going to attract more women with a less than ideal mindset because of his looks. As long as he isn't a porn addicted, chronic masturbator, he'll have enough of a personality to attract women. It is doubtful that this man would be a chronic masturbator because he will get enough IOIs from women to have enough options where he wouldn't feel the need to sedate himself in pornography and masturbation.

Man 2 will get IOIs when he goes to his gym and he won't need to do much to set dates at his gym. He won't need to show much personality on his nightlife venue approaches either. His height + physique are enough to carry him at a nightlife venue with average facial aesthetics.

Respectfully this all surface-level stuff and obvious, However, you always have the outlier guys for example I know a guy who is 6 foot 380 pounds and he bangs hot sluts, he has social proof, is at the best club parties, travels all over the world and is a multi-millionaire. Are the girls banging him for his personality or because he's a nice guy? Obviously not

People forget that not everything is black and white when it comes to women, sometimes nuance is needed

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

This is a good mindset but it has its limits. I'll compare 2 men who might be outliers.

Man 1 is 5'10", overweight, has a neckbeard, and acne. He enjoys playing video games and eating processed foods. He is supremely confident in his own self image as an overweight neckbeard with acne. Even though he might have a good mindset, women are not going to find him appealing based on his looks. Remember that attraction and seduction are about looks, money, status, and personality. This man is weak on looks and it is doubtful his personality will be enough to overcome deficiencies in his looks.

Man 2 is 6'2" and 185 lbs. His BMI is in the normal range, his body fat is around 11-15%, he has good definition in his abdominals and his arms have good muscle mass (his arms aren't huge at that weight though). He isn't as confident in himself as Man 1 for some reason. Perhaps he had some psychological trauma. Man 2 is going to attract more women with a less than ideal mindset because of his looks. As long as he isn't a porn addicted, chronic masturbator, he'll have enough of a personality to attract women. It is doubtful that this man would be a chronic masturbator because he will get enough IOIs from women to have enough options where he wouldn't feel the need to sedate himself in pornography and masturbation.

Man 2 will get IOIs when he goes to his gym and he won't need to do much to set dates at his gym. He won't need to show much personality on his nightlife venue approaches either. His height + physique are enough to carry him at a nightlife venue with average facial aesthetics.

You gave me the two extremes. Most people are in the middle.

Man number 1 will easily pull a woman within his range. If he's content with his current physical condition, i doubt he will be picky on women.

Man number 2 will pull women, but eventually lose them because he hasn't found confidence in himself. He will constantly be depressed and feel lost.

Man number 2 will be with more women, but he will be less satisfied.

You mentioned porn addiction multiple times. That would definitely be a problem. Every guy should cut that out.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

Sosuave's user base has always had above average intelligence.

There have been studies that show that higher IQ leads to less agreeableness and less friends.

This is what you have to deal with. This is what I have to deal with.

Honestly, getting laid is easy in comparison to becoming a quality man.

And when I say quality man, I mean a man that is confident in himself around women and men. A man that can change a tire, fix his radiator, sew his own clothes, cook a great dish, bait a hook and clean his catch etc.

You get the picture.

Live...become confident in yourself and people will gravitate towards you

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I also want to mention that cold-approaching has more value now than it did when i was doing it.

In an age where everyone meets online, the ability to speak in person makes you a god amongst men.

Learn it. Reap the benefits.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

In an age where everyone meets online, the ability to speak in person makes you a god amongst men.

I saw it already when I briefly used dating apps and 'met' women online, chatting with them before meeting. And I found that their wittiness on the chats made them sound almost retarded in conversations as they couldn't 'think on their feet'. In a chat you can take 5-10 minutes to respond and still sound 'quick witted', but in person you can't think for minutes and be considered witty.

And if that happens with women, with men it's even worse, because men are already behind in verbal sparring. If they don't get enough practice, many men revert to grunting responses.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

I saw it already when I briefly used dating apps and 'met' women online, chatting with them before meeting. And I found that their wittiness on the chats made them sound almost retarded in conversations as they couldn't 'think on their feet'. In a chat you can take 5-10 minutes to respond and still sound 'quick witted', but in person you can't think for minutes and be considered witty.

And if that happens with women, with men it's even worse, because men are already behind in verbal sparring. If they don't get enough practice, many men revert to grunting responses.

I came of age when online dating was becoming a thing. I'm an early millennial.

I watched it go from a gold mine to a garbage dump, and it basically happened overnight.

All the sites, almost in tandem, started cracking down on men's ability to reach out to women.

Suddenly, you had to "match" in order to message them. Before that sh1t i was coming up with clever messages and mass sending them. It was glorious for an introvert like myself

They basically made it easier for women to screen men - as if it wasn't easy enough already lol. It made online dating a joke. You now have to spend hours qualifying yourself online.

It's made cold-approaching more sensible than ever. At least when you approach women in person, you know within seconds if you have a chance or not. You also get the added benefit of overcoming your fears and getting an adrenaline boost!

Not to mention the fact that certain characteristics exclusively need to be seen in person: confidence, a quick wit, being able to direct the conversation, a masculine presence

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

It doesn't matter if you're overweight and have acne.

If you have true confidence in yourself, a quick wit (which most introverts have, you just need to practice in person), the ability to lead a conversation (also just takes practice) and a masculine presence (just takes lifting weights and working on stuff around the house) you can clean up.

I'm not saying you can pull 10s, but not many guys can. You need to have realistic expectations. The internet has ruined many a man's brain when it comes to reality; Not everyone gets to fvck the instagram dime and be a millionaire. Get over it already.

Feeling bad for yourself is a feminine trait. Accept your situation and learn how to make it better. Your ancestors had it much harder than you do, pvssy.

In everyday situations, I often think about what my grandfather would think of me.

And you know what? My grandfather would think i'm being a little b1tch.