Moving in the wrong direction

[STR8UP]

Alright, so here I am fresh out of a relationship. I made a vow to remain single and not get involved in another relationship ANYTIME SOON.

So I've been messing round with this chick who I had initially thought was somewhat of a party girl just looking for a good time. Much to my dismay, this doesn't seem to be her M.O. and it looks like she REALLY likes me and wants a relationship. Ugh.

This girl isn't the hottest, but she does have a bangin' body and I would definitely like to sample the goods and possibly make this into a casual thing. The problem is, SHE seems WAAAAAY too into me and I really need to step it down before she gets the wrong idea. She always wants to hold hands and get lovey dovey when our friends are around, and doesn't take well when I joke about other women and such. The classic signs of a chick wanting more than just a casual fling.

Any suggestions as to how to keep a high interest chick from getting too attached?

I got her into bed a couple of times and try as I might couldn't get anything more than a little foreplay. She was soaking wet and getting into it so I know she wants it just as bad as I do but her playing this little "wait for sex" game is taking it into the opposite direction of where I want to go.

I've had plenty of g/f's in the past, but for some reason I was usually in a position that I was the one wanting a relationship, so it was never an issue of backing things down to keep the relationship in check.

Suggestions?

 

[Heretolearn]

depends on the type of guy you are.

Options:

not risky but high drama potential

a) find someone else for that purpose
b) Just keep doing what you are doing and progress it to ### without agreeing to relationship. She will probably think it is one but you will not so you will be free (in your head) to do whatever you want - ie. no guilt if you cheat because you are not in a relationship

risky but high payoff

c) Be upfront with her

d) Be upfront but leave options open

* in your own way


after intimate moment when the question arises
I.e I am just loving to get to know you right now and am not ready for a relationship as I am not good for that RIGHT NOW(excuse here). I think it is great how we can just have fun and not worry about all that other stuff. Then tickle her or do something funny to get a laugh......

 

[STR8UP]

This is some dysfunctional ass sh!t here.

Went out with this chick, a couple of guy friends, and like a bajillion other chicks. Hit my place before, a few drinks later we hit a club.

On the way to the club relationship chick is ALL OVER one of the other GIRLS that showed up at my house. She didn't pay much attention to me, I didn't pay much attention to her. So on the way there, ANOTHER girl and I started talking about real estate, and before you know it she's jumping on me, putting her arm around me and whatnot.

Relationship chick sees this and starts calling my name, I was in the middle of a convo with the other girl so I blew her off.

We get to the club and relationship chick is pretty much ignoring me, so I just had a few drinks and had a good time with the rest of the women. RElationship chick eventually comes up to me and says, "THANKS A LOT FOR CALLING ME TODAY!" SHe also made a comment about how I hadn't responded to her on the street on the way to the club.

So I just went about my business throughout the night. Closing time came, and we all ended up back at my place. A few minutes after we got back relationship chick grabs me and says, "Come here.....I have something to show you upstairs" So I follow her up to the bedroom. She pushes me down on the bed and starts tounging me down.

A couple of minutes in, she starts asking me if I thought the chick she was hitting on was hot. She said she wanted to do her asking if I thought she could pull it off, saying she usually gets what she's after. I said, "Sure she's hot. Go get her and bring her up" She then proceeds to tell me that I am "so nice" and that "most boys wouldn't let me just sleep with them" So I said, "WTF are you talking about.....every time we are in bed you get up and leave.....there's no sleeping!" She then says, "That's becuase you start to get naughty. I only KISS boys" Then I say, "So you're telling me that you fukk girls, but you only kiss guys?" "That's pretty much it" she says. I told her she was a liar, and the reason I knew she was lying is because I knew she was WET right now from rubbing on my d!ck.

Anyways, the convo and tounge action continued until her friend came up and knocked on the door and told her they were leaving.

So WHAT THE FUKK????

I'm not used to this new generation of sexually liberated women who play by a different set of rules. This WHOLE GROUP of women I hang with seem to favor girls but want a little sausage on the side. I really can't figure it out.

I talked to my buddy about this chick and he seems to think she DOES NOT want a serious relationship, so I'm in the clear there. But damn, I ain't gonna do the blue ball thing twice a week while she sits there and talks about how bad she wants some chick.

I'm thinking I just need to DOMINATE this situation and TAKE her instead of screwing around. Seems to me that she would be more likely to respond to being treated like a b!tch that a lady.

Insight would be MUCH appreciated!

 

[phoneproblems]

she really is a lesbian

it's kind of a hilarious scenario, when you think about how many guys want a lesbian. now you got one and guess what? she really is a lesbian. who woulda thought ;-)

maybe time to try a straight woman?

 

[STR8UP]

This just isn't right......

Bisexual chicks are supposed to fukk you a couple of times, then when they get comfortable with you they start bringing along other hot chicks every other night for BOTH of you to get freaky with. That's how it's supposed to work, right?

That was a joke, but seriously, this isn't the first time I have had experience with chicks who dig other chicks, and it doesn't seem to go down the way I want it to. I've known a few guys who have had the pleasure of dating a carpet muncher who loved to share the wealth.

It's hilarious to see this situation unfold since this chick does and says a lot of stuff that would lead me to believe she is looking for a boyfriend BIGTIME, then she turns around and confirms my sneaking suspicion that she's more into pu$$y than d!ck.

I was talking to one of my friends who was with me last night and he seems to think she just wants me to pursue her for awhile then she'll give it up. I don't know how much pursuing I want to do just to get some casual sex. I suppose I should let it play out for awhile longer before I give up. This could prove to be fun if I manage to get her to come around.

She still wants to go out with me on V-day. If I agree to that, there's not going to be any of this kiss and run B.S., that's for sure. ESPECIALLY if I end up paying for the date!

 

[Desdinova]

Well, you've got a couple of options here.

1) When you two are making out and she tells you to stop, say "Okay" and go watch TV. She'll come and drag your ass back into the bedroom for more. When she says "stop", you go do something else. When she comes to question you about leaving, tell her while you're stroking her hair, "Well, you wanted to stop". Then kiss her.

2) Send mixed signals. While you're making out, tell her "You know, I think we should take this slow. I mean, I really want to have sex with a woman I truly care about." Then start eating her out. Believe it or not, this 5hit works. What you're doing is giving her a rejection, but letting her know with your actions that you want to fvck her. It's kinda like a neg-hit. If she asks you "Well, you want to take it slow, but you're eating me out. What's that all about?" give her a nonsense answer, "I'm hungry".

Women don't make any sense. They'll respond well to a guy that doesn't make sense. If you use pure logic with a woman, she'll get confused.

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by Desdinova
Women don't make any sense. They'll respond well to a guy that doesn't make sense. If you use pure logic with a woman, she'll get confused.

I agree 1000%!

That's funny. The whole paragraph #2 is basically all about throwing her contradictory behaviour right back in her face.

It seems that ESPECIALLY with women in their 20's the more stupid and ridiculous (to a point, you can't seem psycho or anything) you are around women the more they like you. The fastest way to lose a chicks interest is to try and behave logically. After she's WAY into you it might be a different story, but in the beginning the more contradictory your behaviour, the better.

Speaking of pushing her away, well, I did to a point. I never really had an opportunity to escape to another room, but when she would say "BEHAVE!" I would roll over or stop and lay there like a dead fish and within about 3 seconds she would be rubbing her cooch on my leg again.

 

[legolas]

Originally posted by Desdinova
Women don't make any sense. They'll respond well to a guy that doesn't make sense. If you use pure logic with a woman, she'll get confused.

Au contraire my friend. I belive that women are indeed logical but for them logic is on a lower order. How they are perceived is more important to them than anything else!! Keep that in mind, and they will make sense again, and then you'll see that they are logical after all.

Oh yes and STR8UP, you ever heard of teasing?

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by legolas
Oh yes and STR8UP, you ever heard of teasing?

Yea, this chick is REALLY good at it. Hahaha

We go back and forth with it, but when it comes down to it all I want is a piece of ass and I don't want to waste a month going about it. She's really not that hot....nice body but thats about it. I've had her in the bedroom several times already and I'm not going to wait around forever for her to give it up.

She's 25 and told me that she's only had sex with two guys. I wouldn't believe her, aside from the fact that now I'm convinced that she's about 91.284763% homosexual. I think chicks really do it for her. I'm tellin ya, she's all up on me until there are other women around and then she's off trying to get some pu$$y!

The other night she commented again that she isn't going to fukk me, saying "You know I've only given it up to two guys in my entire life, what makes you think you're so special?" That was about the time I told her I knew she was full of sh!t cause her panties were getting wet.

I've been playing it cool with her so far and I think I might cool it off even more. The other night I ran into another chick I used to hang with at the clubs and got her number. I'm gonna call her up and try to set something up for this weekend and give the lesbo a chance to miss me

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by STR8UP

Any suggestions as to how to keep a high interest chick from getting too attached?

and keep fvcking her i presume? no. if she has that high of an interest she's already attached. anyway, stick to your original vows. you'll regret it when you're two years into a "relationship" with this, or any, chick.

 

[STR8UP]

Re: Re: Moving in the wrong direction

Originally posted by TooColdUlrick
and keep fvcking her i presume? no. if she has that high of an interest she's already attached. anyway, stick to your original vows. you'll regret it when you're two years into a "relationship" with this, or any, chick.

Well, the whole "likes chicks more than dudes" confirmation throws a big wrench into my theory of her wanting me THAT badly.

Don't worry, there will be NO relationship, I can assure you.

Another thing I might not have mentioned is the fact that she is living with my buddy. SHE claims the two of them dated for over 4 yrs. He says it was more of a friends with benefits sitaution.

I don't know what to make of it, but obviously if she can manage to LIVE with her ex she can't be too much of a psycho possessive freak. He wouldn't have let her move in if that was the case.

On top of it all, my buddy's NEW girl basically lives there too. He said the other day that the two ladies are becoming VERY friendly....wink wink. Sheesh, all of these freaky women and I still have yet to get it on with one of them. Too bad we all party in the same places or I'd be tempted to ditch that whole scene for a couple of weeks and find some fresh prey.

 

[Trag]

Originally posted by STR8UP
Yea, this chick is REALLY good at it. Hahaha

We go back and forth with it, but when it comes down to it all I want is a piece of ass and I don't want to waste a month going about it. She's really not that hot....nice body but thats about it. I've had her in the bedroom several times already and I'm not going to wait around forever for her to give it up.

She's 25 and told me that she's only had sex with two guys. I wouldn't believe her, aside from the fact that now I'm convinced that she's about 91.284763% homosexual. I think chicks really do it for her. I'm tellin ya, she's all up on me until there are other women around and then she's off trying to get some pu$$y!

The other night she commented again that she isn't going to fukk me, saying "You know I've only given it up to two guys in my entire life, what makes you think you're so special?" That was about the time I told her I knew she was full of sh!t cause her panties were getting wet.

I've been playing it cool with her so far and I think I might cool it off even more. The other night I ran into another chick I used to hang with at the clubs and got her number. I'm gonna call her up and try to set something up for this weekend and give the lesbo a chance to miss me

Just a thought, but what if you turned her into a wing. That could provide some insight to this whole picking up girls thing, and would most definately be alot of fun. It might even work to your advantage and get you some of that lesbo action.

That is to say if you decide to freeze her out completely.

Trag

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by Trag
Just a thought, but what if you turned her into a wing. That could provide some insight to this whole picking up girls thing, and would most definately be alot of fun. It might even work to your advantage and get you some of that lesbo action.

That is to say if you decide to freeze her out completely.

Trag

Well, like you said I would have to freeze her out completely, because she seems to get a little pissy when I make a comment about another chick or hit on another chick or whatever.

Her friend was in town the other night and the three of us were sitting in my living room talking about jumping in the jacuzzi and I said something about all of us getting naked. She gave me a dirty look and said, "This is not a happy look on my face!"

Making her a wing would be ideal though.

HEY! That's an idea! I should just straight up tell her that as a man I have needs, and since she doesn't want to have sex with me (yea right!) we should just work as a team to hook up with chicks.

Fukking BRILLIANT! Perfect way to throw her BS back at her!

Why didn't I think of this earlier?

 

[legolas]

Originally posted by STR8UP
Yea, this chick is REALLY good at it. Hahaha

We go back and forth with it, but when it comes down to it all I want is a piece of ass and I don't want to waste a month going about it. She's really not that hot....nice body but thats about it. I've had her in the bedroom several times already and I'm not going to wait around forever for her to give it up.

She's 25 and told me that she's only had sex with two guys. I wouldn't believe her, aside from the fact that now I'm convinced that she's about 91.284763% homosexual. I think chicks really do it for her. I'm tellin ya, she's all up on me until there are other women around and then she's off trying to get some pu$$y!

The other night she commented again that she isn't going to fukk me, saying "You know I've only given it up to two guys in my entire life, what makes you think you're so special?" That was about the time I told her I knew she was full of sh!t cause her panties were getting wet.

I've been playing it cool with her so far and I think I might cool it off even more. The other night I ran into another chick I used to hang with at the clubs and got her number. I'm gonna call her up and try to set something up for this weekend and give the lesbo a chance to miss me

What I would do to this chick next time she'a all hot and bothered but not "giving it up" (by the way chicks really get off when they put up resistance but then are overwhelmed into submission, I read this yesterday and it seems to make sense) is I'd just get her panties wet and around the time she's expecting me to ask for it, I'd just look at my watch and go "Damn I almost forgot about that appointment" Then get up, get dressed, giver her a smooch and say "Sorry we'll have to do this some other time" and then get up and leave!!

Oh and I'd make sure it's happening right when there are no other chicks around. Let her say that you're evil or cruel, in fact if she does, just smile, you've just hit the jackpot!! And of course using jealousy (competition) techniques with her, as you mention above, should also work wonders with her.

 

[STR8UP]

Originally posted by legolas
What I would do to this chick next time she'a all hot and bothered but not "giving it up" (by the way chicks really get off when they put up resistance but then are overwhelmed into submission, I read this yesterday and it seems to make sense) is I'd just get her panties wet and around the time she's expecting me to ask for it, I'd just look at my watch and go "Damn I almost forgot about that appointment" Then get up, get dressed, giver her a smooch and say "Sorry we'll have to do this some other time" and then get up and leave!!

Oh and I'd make sure it's happening right when there are no other chicks around. Let her say that you're evil or cruel, in fact if she does, just smile, you've just hit the jackpot!! And of course using jealousy (competition) techniques with her, as you mention above, should also work wonders with her.

You are talking about turning the tables and doing exactly the same thing she does to me!

Like I said, if she says, "Behave" or some **** like that I roll over and within less than a minute she's escalating things again. You are right though......if I were to take it one step further and actually extract myself from the situation it would probably work to my advantage.

I need to use this in combination with the "turning her into my wing" method. On one hand tell her that her job is to help me get sex with other women, on the other continue to make out with her and sh!t but push HER away when she gets into it.

I think it might work.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Originally posted by STR8UP
I know she wants it just as bad as I do but her playing this little "wait for sex" game is taking it into the opposite direction of where I want to go.

Iron Rule of Tomassi #3:
Any woman who makes you wait for sex, or by her actions implies she is making you wait for sex; the sex is NEVER worth the wait.

When women make you wait for sex you are not their highest priority. Sexuality is spontaneous chemical reaction between two parties, not a process of negotiation of a friendship. It's sex first, then relationship, not the other way around. A woman who wants to fvck you will fly across the country, crawl under barbwire, climb in through your second story bedroom window, fvck the **** out of you and wait patiently inside your closet if your wife comes home early from work - women who want to fvck will find a way to fvck.

I agree with the takeaway methodology in principle, but in this girl's situation your effort might be better spent with more productive women. I'm not a big fan of overcoming LMR in sexual situations. Aside from the 'date rape' vaugeries, I think finding a woman who is unquestionably ready to go is time better spent than trying to solve her head puzzles. I'm of the opinion that If a girl is that into you she'll fvck regardless of ASD or having her friends in the room videotaping it. All women are slvts, you just have to be the right guy to bring it out in them, and this happens before you go back to her place. If you have to plead your case cuddling on the bed, you need to go back to square one and start fresh.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Re: Re: Moving in the wrong direction

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
All women are slvts, you just have to be the right guy to bring it out in them, and this happens before you go back to her place. If you have to plead your case cuddling on the bed, you need to go back to square one and start fresh.

Which explains why Catholic girls are sooooo much fun . . .

 

[STR8UP]

Re: Re: Moving in the wrong direction

Originally posted by Rollo Tomassi
I'm of the opinion that If a girl is that into you she'll fvck regardless of ASD or having her friends in the room videotaping it. All women are slvts, you just have to be the right guy to bring it out in them, and this happens before you go back to her place. If you have to plead your case cuddling on the bed, you need to go back to square one and start fresh.

I think you are underestimating the power of the ASD.

I completely agree that if a chick wants you badly enough, she WILL give it up. HOWEVER........

At the same time the devil is on her left shoulder telling her "DO IT! DO IT! YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT!" there is an angel on her right shoulder telling her "You know better. He's just wants to get into your pants! What will your friends think? He won't respect you tomorrow."

There are more factors in play here than you allude to. It isn't as simple as "If you can make her want you badly enough she will put out". I don't care who you are, unless the chick could care less about what anyone else thinks of her (I know this type is out there but do you really want a chick who will do ANYBODY?) there WILL be some form of ASD, with some women putting it up worse than others.

You are basically saying that if you can't woo your way into her pants immediately you should seek out easier prey. Obviously, the better your game, the easier the kill. But I would say that for the majority of us, a little patience is the key in most cases.

Believe me, I'm not stopping the world for this girl or any other. Since getting out of my last LTR I have managed to get my social life back up to the best it's ever been. I suppose this one is just another "plate", as you would say.