Movie Theater Date.....

[jgoodz]

Alright first off I would just like to remind everyone here that I'm new to the forums, I've been doing quite a bit of reading I read almost every thread in the Don Juan Bible. Excellent advice! Anyway... I just wanna rant a bit about my situation. There is this girl that I've been eyeing ever since I first saw her (gail). She works w/ my friend. I see her every now and then by a local bar that she seems to always go to. I'd say "Hi" whenever i saw her, because shes friends w/ my best friends girl friend. One night My friend and his girlfriend were going out to the movies and invited me... i said "nahhh, i don't wanna be the third wheel... why don't you invite a cute friend (refering to gail )... so unexpedictly they did and she came out w/ us. Now I was just a tad bit nervous going to the movies just because I know for a fact that is like the worse date spot. I mean it's kool to go when you already established a relationship w/ a girl... but when you go on like a first date basis I believe it's just too akward.
Whatever we went to the movies, and it seemed there was a connection. But hard to tell, she was really cool and funny. We hardly got a chance to talk tho or anything it was a pretty quick date. My friends g/f gave me her number to call. But I'm not sure if she just gave it to me or Gail told her to gve it to me.So I was debating to call her the next day or night... Whatever. The following night I go out w/ a friend to the local bars... and by the end since every other place was whack we ended up at the bar where she usually is at... and once we go in who do i see? HER! Talking to a guy and giving her number to him. I was like "WTF!?" already!?" lol whatever.... I play it kool like i didn't even see her... she walks out and stands next to me... I said "hey gail" then made a funny refrence to the movie we saw... she laughed... said maybe like 2 or 3 sentences to each other. and then i believe she just bounced w/ that guy.. didn't even say good-bye or anything. I was preety confused and upset.
That was last night... I need some good advice. I'm thinking about forgetting about her completly. It's a shame tho because I thought there was a lot of potential between us. And my originaly plan was to tell her that night that i got her number and ask if she would mind if i called her sometime. or just call her and be straight foward and just say "i got your number from blah blah hope you don't mind" Regardless after last night all hopes went down the drian w/ this girl. The sadest part is that this seems to be happenning to me a lot recently! I would think a girl is feeling me but by the end I some how get rejected. It sucks!

Thanks to all who read this rant!

 

[skinnydart]

It is perfectly normal for her to accept advances by other guys because you haven't made yours yet. I mean, you ended up at a movie together, but not because you asked her out. As far and she's concerned, you're not interested or at least not man enough to show it. You have the number, give her a call. If she's upset that you got her #/called her, she'll let you know. Just be cool, say something like "Hey, this is Mark, we went to the movie name yesterday?... Do you want to go hang out sometime where we can have more time to talk?" Dont' worry about the other guy, just make your move.

 

[flexion_]

Do you like this girl? If so, ask her to come along to something fun you do in your life. You were given her number on purpose by her friend - any more of a hint that you need?

You haven't asked her out so why would you be upset if she goes out with someone else?

See thats your first mistake - it you are already worried about who she goes out with then you are not going to have much success. Women can smell jealousy or insecurity - if you aren't happy with yourself without a woman then I'm not sure if this stuff will make sense.

 

[jgoodz]

Originally posted by flexion_
Do you like this girl? If so, ask her to come along to something fun you do in your life. You were given her number on purpose by her friend - any more of a hint that you need?

You haven't asked her out so why would you be upset if she goes out with someone else?

See thats your first mistake - it you are already worried about who she goes out with then you are not going to have much success. Women can smell jealousy or insecurity - if you aren't happy with yourself without a woman then I'm not sure if this stuff will make sense.

Good advice, I wasn't really upset or jealous just more dissapointed that she just left me hanging there which showed me she didn't have much intrest in me at that time. I don't know her well enough to say I like her, but from what I see she seems to be my type. I think I'm just going to play it kool for awhile and maybe give her a call this week if anything interesting comes up. Or perhaps I should talk to her friend and see what she says? Or maybe I'm just reading into this too much?

 

[skinnydart]

Don't spend to much time analyzing the situation and wondering why she didn't show enough interest. Don't worry about whether or not she's interested in you or not. She probably hasn't even spent enough time with you for her to make up her mind anyway.

No, I woudn't get most of your information though her friend. Asking her friend 'does she like me?' is way AFC. Also, her friend will be telling her everything you say so she'll end up knowing more about yourself than you know of her, which is kinda the opposite of what you're trying to do. Keep her wondering, let her do the guessing as to whether or not you really like her.

 

[flexion_]

Call her and ask her to come along with you to something fun you do in your life. If she says no thanks then you still have your fun thing in your life to do and you can just ask someone else - see how easy it is when you look at it that way?

Now you don't have to worry about what to do on dates - its just you're life plus a female along for the ride...

Don't talk to her friend first (insecure move) - you'll look like a chump.

 

[jgoodz]

Originally posted by flexion_
Call her and ask her to come along with you to something fun you do in your life. If she says no thanks then you still have your fun thing in your life to do and you can just ask someone else - see how easy it is when you look at it that way?

Now you don't have to worry about what to do on dates - its just you're life plus a female along for the ride...

Don't talk to her friend first (insecure move) - you'll look like a chump.

Excellent advice. I need more fun things to do during the week.

 

[jgoodz]

- update.... I called her and she was with my friend's girl, having dinner and she invited me to go along to the movies w/ them... even though I'm sick I still went out w/ them tonight. But like I said I HATE the movie dates. Especially when it's a double date. I didn't really make any moves like put my arm around her because I felt stupid doing it. But I know she is kinda feeling me because she would kinda lean into me. What ever we have some kino chemistry going on. Any advice on making the first move? Next time... it ended w/ her going to the local bar she ALWAYS go to. and me going home play video games and posting on this site. (I got work tomorrow too) anyway... any advice out there?

 

[Walden]

Faint heart never won ƒuck all.

 

[jgoodz]

update- I called her the other day.... chit hcat for 2 min. then she had to go into work she said "Can I call you back later?" I said "Sure" or whatever. She never called me back. I think I'm done chasing her. I'm over her I need to move on the to the next victim. It's a shame tho she had potential.

 

[flexion_]

So we gave you advise to call her and set up a date - what was your date idea? From what I infer here, you called her to set up a date and she asked you to come out with her friends.

MISTAKES:
1) *You* set up dates not her.
2) It appears to me that you called her for some other reason than to ask her to come along on specific date - otherwise this situation would have never happened. The phone is used to set up dates and nothing more.
3) If she asked you to come along you should have told her you were busy (or you were sick) that night and that you were calling to have her <Insert fun date you have in your life to which you were going to invite her to come along with you to> - you were sick and didn't even want to go... LOL
4) Being stuck in that bad first date situation - you didn't go to the bar with her after the movie.

AND NOW:
As a result you got stuck in a situation that made you feel silly and was difficult at best to make any move on her - and she thinks your a chump now.
And you did it all infront of her friends.

Your only real chance to do anything would have been at the bar (where she would be drinking) and you didn't go because you had to work the next day??

 

[Walden]

Originally posted by jgoodz
update- I called her the other day.... chit hcat for 2 min. then she had to go into work she said "Can I call you back later?" I said "Sure" or whatever. She never called me back. I think I'm done chasing her. I'm over her I need to move on the to the next victim. It's a shame tho she had potential.

Yeah bro good form.Call her in a month and say youve been busy.

 

[squirrels]

Going to a movie does not entitle you to "first dibs." Of course she's going to be seeing other guys and shopping around until she's really sold on one of them, be that you or someone else.

Yeah, movies generally ARE a ****ty first-date. Best to have something planned before and/or after so you can loosen up and get to know her. But think about it...being on a date when you don't have to speak except in whispers can be advantageous if this girl ends up being hot for you physically.

By the way, if you don't get a girl's number from HER HERSELF, you may as well throw it out. It's meaningless. It's like if I gave you my ATM pin number...you don't know what bank I'm with, what account number I have, and you certainly don't have my card.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

What's that over the horizon??? Oh no! Is it???!!! Oh yes it is... IT'S THE LAND OF LJBF!!!!!! :EEK:

You need to change course before you are sucked in, never to return!!!!