Most disturbing thing I've come to realize

[Nygard]

Today I was reading Roissy's entry on that murderer that commited the shooting in arizona and stumbled upon a link to his own blog talkign about Sodini, remember?
Since I'm still doing nothing because of vacations, I decided to check the comments and somebody copied the contents of Sodini's former blog then it struck me: I'm doing far worse than Sodini ever did at my age and at every other point it's like a reflection of my own life. Am I bound to age until I'm at my 50's, totally unhinged and shooting at masses? Is this how it ends?

This can't be ****ing right.

 

[Strelok]

Link to what you read?
It's not exactly something that is common knowledge.

 

[Nygard]

http://roissy.wordpress.com/2011/01/12/shades-of-george-sodini/

There you go. And it's not only about this guy or how it ends. My uncle killed himself at 50+ and I never knew a woman in his life. I was listening to This American Life the other day about this young man who was suicidal, he never fitted in and never had a woman or anything. The stories are pretty much the same: Bad childhood and teenage years, negative father figure, zero role models, no fitting in with society, absolutely no dating success.
Is this really what it comes down to at the end?

 

[r0cky]

Do you seriously believe that your destiny is completely out of your control?

 

[Captain Nemo]

Short answer: never, EVER, compare your progress and/or status in life with that of another man, no matter how "similar" the patterns and appearances may be.

You must only compare and compete with yourself.

If you believe you are in a bad spot, if you are truly unhappy in your life then your only hope is take action to improve.

As others on this forum have stated consistently over the years: it's not easy to change. But change is the only way to have something you've never had before.

Study the posts by Victory Unlimited and Interceptor, and then take ACTION based on those posts. FOLLOW their advice, fight hard to overcome apathy and fear...and focus only on attaining what you want.

CN

 

[Nygard]

Do you seriously believe that your destiny is completely out of your control?

I believe it's under control for people that can actually take action in their life. I've never been able to take action about personal things. I always give up on myself not long after, which pretty much screws everything up. But if I want to change that awful trait on me, I need to actually take action on it, which pretty much completes a vicious cycle. So yeah, concerning personal things like these, it's not under my control.

 

[BBbardot]

most pyromaniacs are firemen
it doesn't mean most of firemen are pyromaniacs.


Sad poeple that commit suicide might often be alone and maybe failed at social life.
doesn't mean that if you face similar issues, you're going to commit suicide.
You're in control of your life.


just noticed you age, you're so young to feel like your life could be leading to one vry dark point. Your apparent state of mind is worrying me.. : /
hang in there, you will make it and have a wonderfull life.
you have control you can acheive whatever you want.
If you needto talk more about whats going on in your life the membrs are here to help.

 

[Nygard]

But how do I take control? Every single plan I've laid out and tried ever since I hit rock bottom after high school has failed because I can't take action on things concerning myself. The therapists just tell what I already know, they don't offer any help. How do you change that?

 

[BBbardot]

But how do I take control? Every single plan I've laid out and tried ever since I hit rock bottom after high school has failed because I can't take action on things concerning myself. The therapists just tell what I already know, they don't offer any help. How do you change that?

well you would have to go more into details about yourself for us to answer this question..

 

[Nygard]

Specifically what kind of information would that be? Which details, because I honestly could write a small book with everything all in all.

 

[AAAgent]

It's normal to not be normal.

Normal is a term society has attempted to brainwash into the masses so there is order. Don't worry about if you're different. H3ll i think i'm fvcking crazy sometimes. I have anger issues and i think about doing crazy sh1t to people but i don't.

First things first, if you're not John Nash, Michael Phelps, or some kind of genius you will fail. You might even fail a lot at the things you try at. My friend picked up a LSAT book and started to answer the questions. He answered about 60% right as a freshman in college which is pretty decent. Well it looked fun and if he could do it, it proves that its possible so i decided to try it as well and i got 0% right. I did not answer 1 single question correctly on a multiple choice test. I didn't even know how to approach the problem let alone answer it correctly. It took me 4 years and re-reading the instructions and guides 9 times to finally understand it. I was averaging 70% of the logic games questions right on the LSAT the last time i took it.

The point is, if someone else can do it than that means its possible. If you can't do it, it just means you're not trying hard enough. Don't see failure as failure, see every failure as a closer step towards success.

You sound like you don't even like yourself. You should probably start doing things that will raise your self esteem and make you value yourself more in your own eyes.

Work out and get fit. Build some muscles so you feel stronger. You can change your hair style and clothing to be more trendy and pair this with a better body you will definitely feel better.

girls do it all the time. They get all down and full of emotions/depression. Once they drop a few pounds, go to the salon and put on a new outfit, their whole attitude changes because they feel good about themselves.

Work on making changes that will make you feel good about yourself and keep working at the goals you have set for yourself no matter how many times you fail.

 

[Daddy The Pimp]

Yo dude, im interested to help you transform your life. Or at least lead you to the right direction.

If you're interested, PM me a picture of yourself.
DTP

 

[Romeo1]

I concur!

Short answer: never, EVER, compare your progress and/or status in life with that of another man, no matter how "similar" the patterns and appearances may be.

You must only compare and compete with yourself.

If you believe you are in a bad spot, if you are truly unhappy in your life then your only hope is take action to improve.

As others on this forum have stated consistently over the years: it's not easy to change. But change is the only way to have something you've never had before.

Study the posts by Victory Unlimited and Interceptor, and then take ACTION based on those posts. FOLLOW their advice, fight hard to overcome apathy and fear...and focus only on attaining what you want.

CN

I agree with this,just minutes ago i was reading stuff on how to stopped comparing myself with others,i feel the same way nygard feels,but have my own story. Im 24 years old and find myself improving slowly but lacking,but theres so much work that needs to be done on my part regrets,past that im dealing with sux,i hate the comfort zone im now,i want to be my own man,independent.Ill look into those posts!

 

[Nygard]

DTP, just contacted you on the gmail address on your profile, if you don't mind.

 

[Slickster]

Nygard, have you done much travelling to other countries?

If you are feeling hopeless in your current situation then maybe it is time for a trip.

Travelling to a foreign country is always good for your soul. It can give you a lot of perspective about yourself. You will meet many new people and it can give you a fresh new look on your life. Even if you can't get out of the country even another city or town can give you a new experience.

Don't rely on friends or women to bring you happiness. Happiness comes from within.

Is there anything you are doing to improve the world around you? Helping others in your community, volunteering, being a positive influence on others will all go a long way in your journey to a better place.

Good luck

Slickster

 

[Nygard]

Yes Slickster, I've been to Cancun, Argentina, Los Angeles, San Francisco.
Travelling does me a great good, but it's often short-lived and I always come back to my same down mindset as soon as I step back into Colombia. I know I should move, but immigration laws have been holding me in this ****hole.

 

[BBbardot]

Specifically what kind of information would that be? Which details, because I honestly could write a small book with everything all in all.

well try to be simple and straight forward and explain how your life is in a few lines

 

[BBbardot]

Yo dude, im interested to help you transform your life. Or at least lead you to the right direction.

If you're interested, PM me a picture of yourself.
DTP

*non serious post*
*jk*

haha I wouldn't follow to a quiet place a guy that is called daddy the pimp, but that's just me^^

but seriousely: OP you talked abut immigration law..? what do you mean?

pfouuu im worried about op he seem like in a very dark place

you really need to tell us the story NYgard

 

[Nygard]

Well my life? On vacations and weekends, I spend all my time inside my house doing nothing really. I go to the gym 3 times a week but it only eats up one hour and there's nobody there anyways. I know I need to go out but I have nowhere to go.Medellin, Colombia, is not a place for a lonely people. There is nowhere to meet people and when you try to reach out they pull back, everything is social circles. My social circle is pretty closed and they are never available. I don't have any money to go to clubs and the bars are far away. Public transport shuts down at 10 pm because of crime levels. Walking home is an invitation to get stabbed for some shoes. I don't have a car for myself to get around and if I did, there's no safe parking. I have zero self esteem, I don't think I'm good-looking, I don't have a clue on how to connect with people here, I believe I'm socially retarded or something.
During university time I don't have money and on top of that I don't have time. I can't meet chicks or people on my major because it's software engineering and we all know most people studying that are neither chicks nor people. I have huge trust issues that come from 10 years of psychological abuse, I don't even trust some relatives of mine. All my life until a few years ago, I never made eye contact with anyone, not even my family. I didn't know what my family's eye color was, I've been forcing myself lately but I can't be constantly thinking about it and forget it at times. I live in my head, I sometimes go to bed at midnight and keep thinking and thinking until the sun rises. Also, like I said, I give up easily on myself and can't control much of what's going on in my mind.

I think that's most of it. Might be missing little details that should not matter much.

I talked about immigration because I live in Colombia. I lived in LA for 6 months and that experience got me out of rock bottom. That was 4 years ago, however.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Being in school is a means to an end. It doesn't last forever. When you're done and have a marketable skill, it should not be difficult to find a different place to live, even if it is within your own country.