Most commonly asked newbie questions answered right here!

lordson

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all those tips rely on the pretense that you are

1. as attractive as the girl youre persuing

and

2. not horribly boring

which is the case some of the time

i have immense trouble holding an interesting conversation for longer thatn a minute, and even find it even harder to come up with funny stuff to say

and i always have these 20 second silences in phone conversations with girls, talking to guys on phones is fine, but those 20 seconds feel like an hour, and i have to come up with somethign stupid like "so, u watch TV?"

my mind just doesn't tick that way, only child see, great lack of social skills

do you have any tips for the guys chaing women who are more attractive than them, and fer boring people

or am i doomed?

good posts though
 

Bosshogg

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How much persistance?

I like the thing about pers. VS clingy.

This girl I met is extremely reserved..Doesnt give much indication of anything other than telling me she had a great time with me the two times we hung out..BUT the other day..she says out of the blue.."I like the fact that you`re persistant, you dont give up easily"....

My question is when should you give up?? cause not every girl will blatenly come out and say.."leave me alone"...hehe


Dont get me wrong..I`m playing the game just as much...called her yesterday after a week of not calling and told her to call me Sunday night if she wanted to hang out....What would you guys do if she doesnt call??


Thanks Guys

still learning here :)
 

anonymousguy

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Hey!

I got a newbie question:

How to seduce a girl without AFC-methods like "sucking up"?

Please give me some tips, because I always think that sucking up helps. What must I do then? Act normal? What is "acting normal" then?

Cheers,
anonymousguy
 

zidane

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golld

Now I know how these black dudes are bagging this blondes...PERSISTANCE DAM IT!!!

I didn't realize the difference between clingyness and persistance

THIS IS COOL.LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
 

anonymousguy

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Ok, I'm clearly debarking from the "AFC zone". It's time thus to post some new insights...

Get the right attitude: don't worry that you haven't got a girl or "few" girls
Why do you bother if you haven't got a girl? Is it such a bad thing? Of course things would be better if you had a girlfriend, but what would have changed for you? How can a girlfriend change your entire life?

The clue is that you have to STOP looking so desperately for a girl. Try to focus back on your life and you will eventually find a new girl. Desperate guys looking for a girlfriend will turn off women. It's even more pathetic if you only talk to women and start to ignore your male friends.
Women aren't the only things in life!
As an ex-newbie, I can only recommend that you start to relax, and start to enjoy life. The love of your life will come to you, and it would seem like you didn't have to do a thing to seduce your future girlfriend. A true Don Juan never worries if he hasn't got a girl for a long time. He stays calm and waits for the right girl to come by.

Don't worry, be happy:D
 

anonymousguy

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Who should control the relationship?

Most men on this board will say that the "man has to control everything".

Unfortunately is this statement only correct for a certain extent.

A relationship is about giving AND taking. The two are unseperatably like "Ying & Yang". If you have a good starting relationship, it will be likely that you will influence your girlfriend AND your girlfriend will influence you. Men and women complete each other.
In the short term, the so called "jerk" will have succes. In the long term the "Don Juan" will win this race, because he respects a woman's freedom. It's important that you always think a few steps ahead, otherwise the girl will simply walk away.

But Anonymousguy(AG) shouldn't the man make the first step? Not always. In fact, it doesn't even matter who makes the first step, who will remember it anyways? The point is that you create attraction and that one of you two overcomes the fear of rejection and start to take some risks.
No pain, no gain. If you failed then at least you have learnt something. And you all know that you learn from your mistakes

Starting from scratch?

Sometimes it is better that you just start from the bottom. It is sometimes more difficult to fix a sinking ship. Just take a fresh start and use your knowledge to seduce a girl in the appropriate way.
Like all guys say here: take a break from seducing. Your mind and body need to absorb the new information in order to seduce even better!

Having patience?

Most newbies make the mistake of wanting too much too fast. They all forget that Rome was not build in one day.
Learning to seduce is like learning to bicycle.In the beginning it isn't fun and you fall a lot. This phase takes a while. You start to hate bicycling, but after a while, you can actually ride the bicycle. It's all casual and it doesn't go very well, but at least you don't fall as often as in the beginning.You will also make a lot of mistakes, but then you start to learn new tricks.
In the near future you have come to the point where you need a new bike.This is the time that you start to explore new areas and take your bike experiences to a higher level. It is inevitable that you will fall, even with the amount of experience that you have now learnt. Even a professional falls once in a while, it's only human to make mistakes, but he knows it is the only way to improve and innovate his bicyling techniques.
Don't forget that the evolution never stops. The sky is the limit.

What if a girl approached me and indicates that she likes me?

This is probably too good to be true.
Why is this? She might be an attention wh0re (or a sl*t looking for some easy sex).
" WARNING SIGN #9: Instant Attraction -

Attraction and admiration take time to occur. When you get to know someone it takes time to get impressed. If it happens too fast, beware. Probably what is happening is that the Aw is "being" someone you'd like to see, not her true self. Don't forget they are camaleons and can change colors in a blink of an eye. "
My advice is that you still keep looking and dating with other women. And ff the Attention wh0re "disappears" into the night, you have at least another girl who you can seduce in the mean time.

The following reference is a must read if you found such a girl: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=55343
Don't be fooled by such girls. It seems like winning the lottery, but you in reality you have been scammed.
 

anonymousguy

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How many women should I "seduce"?

The answer is one. As a newbie you should start small. Work on one girl and see what works and what doesn't work. Don't try to seduce multiple women, as it will be difficult to fall in love with even one of the girls. Falling in love gives you the advantage and disadvantage that you want a girl so hard. Eventually you will give up everything, just to get the girl. But, beware of "one-itis". If it doesn't work with one girl, try to recover her for a small period of time. And if you failed at everything: next her and start all over again.

What are the best places to approach women?

The places where you normally WONT seduce women. I have concluded that women are actually far more approachable if you just "surprised" them. Talk to them when you are waiting in the grocery store, on the street, EVERYWHERE. Even the library is a place to seduce women!
The advantage of this technique is that women won't have their "defense" mechanism up, because they won't expect that a man will seduce them.
If you go to the normal places like pubs, dance temples, disco and other stuff,... women are a bit more careful. And they are probably hit on for 10 times by other male competitors.
This is also what women want: "I only went to the library, and there I met the man of my dreams..." Use this tip to your advantage...

Learn and gain experience?

It's important to go out at least once a week to try and seduce women, otherwise you'll forget everything you've learned. Another perhaps "fanatic tip" is to memorize everything that is usefull to you. That way you won't forget it.

Getting the "F" out of AFC?

I know most men come here because they are frustrated. They don't understand women, think they are all *****es. In fact, the newbies should learn to understand women and stay relaxed. Women like men that are NOT frustrated. So, before you seduce: get in a relax mental state and trust the world and it's goodness, but don't be a stupid naive AFC person!!!

What if she doesn't return my calls/sms messages/emails?

This usually means NOTHING. Do not think that having an answer to your phone calls means something. The girl you want to contact can be busy, or they "forgot" to answer you. The only thing that counts is to see the person in "real life".

If you want a real life example, here's one:
I met this girl that I did not try to seduce. I only wanted to know her a little better. So I sent her an email, but she didn't respond to it. She said her internet connection was broken. This could be true, but it sounded a little bit flaky. Of course I stayed cool. I pretended that it didn't matter, but she still wanted to meet up with me. She would send me an sms at 13.00 hours so I would know when we would go out. Unfortunately she was a bit late and sent the first sms at 19.00 hours, the 2nd one to confirm the date at 20.45 hours.
I know this is a small story, but the point is: have patience, think that there are other fishes in the sea, and stop worrying about those stupid phone calls.
 

Jukeboxhero

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Really good stuff, man. A very enlightening thread.

I do have one more newbie question to add to the list though. What do you consider doing to "make a move" if she is playing hard to get and/or NOT answering your calls. If I invite some girl to do something I sometimes get "Yes" or "maybe, I'll call you!" usually I never get a call from them and if I have their number and they don't answer their phone, I don't know how else to make a move.
 
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