Momentum in dating

[Glassguy]

One thing that I pay attention to is the momentum with a chick from date to date as it tells me a lot about situation, chemistry, etc.

There are really 2 scenarios-

1.) You go out on date 1. When you see her again for date 2, its like starting over momentum wise (convo, affection, sexually, etc). Same from date 2 to date 3. Even if date 1 is a drinks date and date 2 or 3 are her coming to your house, the momentum is important.

2.) Things seem to pick up where they left off from one date to the next. This is a very good thing.

From my personal experience when the momentum carries from date to date, the woman has very high interest and has really been looking forward to seeing you and you dont have much (or any) current competition.

2 examples of this from this past week:

Woman A- First date was drinks (3 weeks ago). Lots of good convo, kissing at the end of the date. Date 2 was ax throwing and drinks (live music). Date 2 was 2 weeks ago. She got quite sexual on date 2 which could have been alcohol induced. On date 3 it was as if things started over. She was good company but the touchy feely from her was very reserved. Date ended on some kissing that was far less sexual than date 2. This was last Thursday.
So I have not reached out since that last date.

Woman B- drinks date (which was date 1). She met me, rode with me to the venue and we had a few drinks. I suggested going back to my place for some wine and watch some NFL football which was on at the time, which she was totally down for. Things got pretty heated sexually. She came over last night and within 10 minutes we are on my sectional making out and things again started heating up sexually. The momentum clearly carried over from date 1 to date 2.

What I take from this:

When the momentum doesnt carry over from one date to the next, IMO it means that woman is on the fence about you. Or she has someone else that she has her mind on, doesnt know what she wants, etc. It could be 1000 different reasons but it rarely works in my favor to getting what I want.

When that momentum carries over from date to date its a very good thing. These women have very high interest and she is probably really looking forward to seeing me and her actions. There is a smaller chance a woman showing this behavior has numerous guys she is seeing/talking to and things just seem to flow much smoother with chemistry.

It really doesnt matter if you are seeing one woman or 5 women. How the momentum carries over (or doesnt) from date to date is something that we should be keeping an eye on as it will tell us what we are dealing with in a particular woman.

Happy Hunting

 

[BillyPilgrim]

Glass, were you able to notice a difference in the interest level between woman A and woman B prior to the first date?

 

[Dr.Suave]

I love your posts but this has not been my experience. My experience has been that just by the fact that a girl shows up for a second date it means her interest is high and that she will show up for date 3 and forward.

In my experience, no interest = No showing up for second date. Once she shows up for a second date, its game over, my confidence blasts through the roof because now I know she wants me.

Once she shows up for a second date you will bang her sooner or later as long as A)You don´t loose interest in her yourself or B) Dont say or do anything stupid to screw this up, which at this point would be very difficult because it has not happened to me yet.

Momentum stuff FROM THEM? By this point (second date and forward), sometimes its me the one who starts with the "One step back, two steps forward" stuff when I just foking feel like it. Not even sure why I do it, maybe its my gut, just for kicks, to experiment; but at this point doesnt even matter if I do it or not, the outcame is the same: If she shows up for second date she will bang you sooner or later.

Actually, yeah, now that I think about it , I can remember (very few) examples where girls took a step back. They are women, they are emotional, there could be a million reasons why she took a step back.

Whatever. I remember brushing it off and next date things were back on track.

Problem is when in a ltr and you start getting a net negative momentum over the course of an extended period of time. Better jump ship because she will end the relationship sooner or later if you dont do it first.

 

[Barrister]

I think when you experience an interruption and dial back in "momentum" as you are calling it it is almost always due to the woman seeing someone else that she is just as or more interested in. Woman A is likely not only seeing you but also someone else she is very interested in. Or there is still an ex in the picture she isn't over and you get this hot/cold out of her while she sorts out what she is feeling. Like you state, it could be many things, but usually it is because there is someone else you are competing with IMO. Doesn't mean you have done anything wrong but does mean it is time to put more attention on the women who are giving you very high interest.

 

[Glassguy]

Glass, were you able to notice a difference in the interest level between woman A and woman B prior to the first date?

A little. Woman A was getting frisky (alcohol possibly) at the end of the first date but hooking up was not a physical option.

Woman B came back to my place at the end of the date.

So physical action yes there was a slight difference. But doesnt mean to say woman A wouldnt have came back to my place at the end of date 1 if the schematics allowed.

 

[Glassguy]

I think when you experience an interruption and dial back in "momentum" as you are calling it it is almost always due to the woman seeing someone else that she is just as or more interested in. Woman A is likely not only seeing you but also someone else she is very interested in. Or there is still an ex in the picture she isn't over and you get this hot/cold out of her while she sorts out what she is feeling. Like you state, it could be many things, but usually it is because there is someone else you are competing with IMO. Doesn't mean you have done anything wrong but does mean it is time to put more attention on the women who are giving you very high interest.

True, as the way I handle it is just dropping off the face of the earth and she either reaches back out or she doesnt.

It forces her to show her hand either way. And I am fine either way.

 

[Toddz]

Good Post. As far as momentum and escalating towards sex which is my goal when dating a new woman, I just always make sure logistics are set in making that happen. Date 1 is public meet and greet and date 2 or 3 is always at home dinner at my place or hers. Women know what the deal is and either comply or flake out. Either way, you know exactly where you stand and it eliminates the guessing game.

 

[2Rocky]

There is going to be a lot of N=1 sort of anecdotal experience on a post like this...I'll give mine.

From date 1 to 2 I find that the higher emotional spike on Date 1 you can deliver, the higher level of interest will be maintained for date 2. Plain and simple...

If she is telling you at the end of Date 1 that she really wants to go on a date again, she is going to come into the second date much more enthusiastic because she associates those positive feelings with you.

I once had a first date last 3 days....and it was 60 days until the second date. You can bet that second date was hot as well...

A woman I took to bed in a Hotel the same night, invited me back for a second night. When I left the day after the second night, she was asking me to stay a third....

So what is a good emotional spike ?

1) multiple orgasms
2) Fulfilling emotional experiences (first time doing something, otr the most fulfilling experience doing that yet.)
3) Anticipation for a deeper connection and experience on second date.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

One thing that I pay attention to is the momentum with a chick from date to date as it tells me a lot about situation, chemistry, etc.

There are really 2 scenarios-

1.) You go out on date 1. When you see her again for date 2, its like starting over momentum wise (convo, affection, sexually, etc). Same from date 2 to date 3. Even if date 1 is a drinks date and date 2 or 3 are her coming to your house, the momentum is important.

2.) Things seem to pick up where they left off from one date to the next. This is a very good thing.

From my personal experience when the momentum carries from date to date, the woman has very high interest and has really been looking forward to seeing you and you dont have much (or any) current competition.

2 examples of this from this past week:

Woman A- First date was drinks (3 weeks ago). Lots of good convo, kissing at the end of the date. Date 2 was ax throwing and drinks (live music). Date 2 was 2 weeks ago. She got quite sexual on date 2 which could have been alcohol induced. On date 3 it was as if things started over. She was good company but the touchy feely from her was very reserved. Date ended on some kissing that was far less sexual than date 2. This was last Thursday.
So I have not reached out since that last date.

Woman B- drinks date (which was date 1). She met me, rode with me to the venue and we had a few drinks. I suggested going back to my place for some wine and watch some NFL football which was on at the time, which she was totally down for. Things got pretty heated sexually. She came over last night and within 10 minutes we are on my sectional making out and things again started heating up sexually. The momentum clearly carried over from date 1 to date 2.

What I take from this:

When the momentum doesnt carry over from one date to the next, IMO it means that woman is on the fence about you. Or she has someone else that she has her mind on, doesnt know what she wants, etc. It could be 1000 different reasons but it rarely works in my favor to getting what I want.

When that momentum carries over from date to date its a very good thing. These women have very high interest and she is probably really looking forward to seeing me and her actions. There is a smaller chance a woman showing this behavior has numerous guys she is seeing/talking to and things just seem to flow much smoother with chemistry.

It really doesnt matter if you are seeing one woman or 5 women. How the momentum carries over (or doesnt) from date to date is something that we should be keeping an eye on as it will tell us what we are dealing with in a particular woman.

Happy Hunting

+1

I always approach it as though I won't see her again. No walking on ****ing egg shells. It's not Disney on ice. Momentum is key. Not necessary but it definitely is helpful.

High interest level and hyper compliance is king. There's no substitute for it.

 

[nismo-4]

A woman's interest lies in what she's looking for at the time you talk with her i.e., does she need a new orbiter because 3 of hers blocked her? Does she need pic comments for her meals? Does she need sex? Does she need new Onlyfans subscribers? Does she need that new Birkin? Does she want the golden tomahawk steak at Salt Bae's? Does she need a payment on her BMW car note, Verizon phone, AmEx card, or luxury apartment rent because she's 2 months behind? Etc. Her interest will be different between asking her out February 11th vs. October 13th.

If she's on the fence about you, there's a better guy or ex in the picture. Even a bf or husband. When the momentum drops, this is the reason 255/256 times. Better believe your friendzone invitation is being written. Sure sometimes life happens, but don't bet money on that 1/256 chance. With the flaking epidemic really rampant, Chad, Tyrone, Enrique, Vishnu, and Hiroshi could be around.

So if momentum is cold or wishy-washy, just ghost her. You shouldn't want a woman who doesn't want your ass. Find the next woman.

Second place is first loser.

Case closed.

 

[greatsnake]

One thing that I pay attention to is the momentum with a chick from date to date as it tells me a lot about situation, chemistry, etc.

There are really 2 scenarios-

1.) You go out on date 1. When you see her again for date 2, its like starting over momentum wise (convo, affection, sexually, etc). Same from date 2 to date 3. Even if date 1 is a drinks date and date 2 or 3 are her coming to your house, the momentum is important.

2.) Things seem to pick up where they left off from one date to the next. This is a very good thing.

From my personal experience when the momentum carries from date to date, the woman has very high interest and has really been looking forward to seeing you and you dont have much (or any) current competition.

2 examples of this from this past week:

Woman A- First date was drinks (3 weeks ago). Lots of good convo, kissing at the end of the date. Date 2 was ax throwing and drinks (live music). Date 2 was 2 weeks ago. She got quite sexual on date 2 which could have been alcohol induced. On date 3 it was as if things started over. She was good company but the touchy feely from her was very reserved. Date ended on some kissing that was far less sexual than date 2. This was last Thursday.
So I have not reached out since that last date.

Woman B- drinks date (which was date 1). She met me, rode with me to the venue and we had a few drinks. I suggested going back to my place for some wine and watch some NFL football which was on at the time, which she was totally down for. Things got pretty heated sexually. She came over last night and within 10 minutes we are on my sectional making out and things again started heating up sexually. The momentum clearly carried over from date 1 to date 2.

What I take from this:

When the momentum doesnt carry over from one date to the next, IMO it means that woman is on the fence about you. Or she has someone else that she has her mind on, doesnt know what she wants, etc. It could be 1000 different reasons but it rarely works in my favor to getting what I want.

When that momentum carries over from date to date its a very good thing. These women have very high interest and she is probably really looking forward to seeing me and her actions. There is a smaller chance a woman showing this behavior has numerous guys she is seeing/talking to and things just seem to flow much smoother with chemistry.

It really doesnt matter if you are seeing one woman or 5 women. How the momentum carries over (or doesnt) from date to date is something that we should be keeping an eye on as it will tell us what we are dealing with in a particular woman.

Happy Hunting

yep, momentum is key!