Mixed Feelings, Kisses, Ex and Mistakes!

iqqi

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Re: I understand this ..but

Originally posted by tiburon
Iqqi : The thin line i was refering too was the fact that even tough i said i was not putting upo with that crap at first ......one thing is to say it and another is to do it ..like everything else in life.

Tiburon
i KNOOWOWOWOWOOW. that is my point. right now you have been working on the chemistry and attraction between you two, building things, if you will. but you have "lifted your foot up" (as opposed to putting your foot down) on the ex situation. you realize this, and know it can lead to her thinking she can have her cake and eat it too.

but you have to be suave in how you deal with that particular issue. you know this, or you wouldn't be worried about it. you are putting up with it right now to build on your rapport and connection. you don't want to hurt it by pounding this negative issue in her head over and over.

riiight?
 

OpenMind

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You are getting somewhere BUT...

Disappear for a week and STOP worrying that she thinks your a womanizer. She is obviously thinking about you when you're not around. That is how you raise her interest level. Who gives a shyt what she is thinking. This is about you. You are the man... do what YOU want. Kiss her all you want when you are with her, but stop being so available to her when she wants you to be. Let her think that you are with other women and your value in her eyes will increase.. And by the way, who cares if she has an ex.. the more you care the more she knows your high interest level in her which will ultimately lower hers for you.. NEVER talk about this again.. when she brings it up change the subject.. this will drive her crazy... Good luck!

Openmind
 

iqqi

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openmind's post are the absolute gold here, but i think that tiburon is in too deep for that not caring sh!t. he does and he can't reverse it, too late.

i'd recommend finding another girl that you like alot, and keeping BOTH of those eggs in your basket until one proves themselves worthy.
 

OpenMind

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true but..

We know he cares thatsd why he is posting about this so much.. what he has to do is not SHOW her that he cares so much and therefore she will be thinking about him so much that her interest level will go through the roof.. the ex situation is so unimportant at this point because when she falls hard for him (Tiburon) she will remove the ex from the picture on her own. The way to get what you want is to give other's what they want. By driving her interest level through the roof you will make her want YOU, and then ultimately you will get what you want....
 

OpenMind

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One other thing...

You are at a critical point right now.. and given the fact that u have high interest in her it is very easy for you to fukk this situation up. The longer you arent around the higher her interest level is going, so use this to your advantage because the more your see her the more you are risking your high interest to get in the way. This is a no brainer.. disapper for a week = her interest level will go up... call her tuesday and ask her out= validate to her that you like her and she go out with her and make yourself vulnerable to your own possible mistakes.. i am not saying that seeing her is gonna make you lower her intereszt level but why take the chance?
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

tiburon

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WAIT A SECOND

Iqqi you suprise me....Tiburon too deep...hahahah

Listen the girl is as sweet as sugar an seems to be good person but Tiburon has lived already too much and you can be a bithday cake but if i need to be a d1ck ....i am always ready to send everyone to fvck themselves......Iqqi you seem to have forgootten how i am..lol

Ofcourse i havent mentioned the ex ....and i did tell her the first time aswell that if we were ever to go out and live one day at a time that i didnt want to hear that again. I DID SET MY FOOT DOWN but iqqui you are right ......trying to build that attraction and connection to get her hook is very delicate in this issue because it could lead to not seeting my foot down(Something NOt of My character) I relaize this as you said, and thats why now i am watching my next steps....and therefore decided to disappear for a week and become less available.

In fact i am not sure myself i want a relationship....i am very picky as you know about the girls i choose to be with ..she is great so far ..but like i said, so far and i dont know her that well. I do like her but even though the EX does bother to be honest is more like an obstacle i had rather not face, but whatever.

Now as a real fact i remeber writting before in this forum about hoes, sluts, relationships etc....I dont think relationship are that great ...you need to find someone who is as real as you are and a great person...I do my tests and she has passed some of them...but there are mnay tmore to come that would lead me to find out if is worth being a relationship with her.....ofcourse we first need to get HER HOOKED IN ..which seems to be the case so far.


No let me just say that i once mentioned in this forum aswell that i was willing to screw a hundrew woman just for the heck of it without getting into a relationship because in order for me to get into a relationship with a woman she needed to be a great woman , and a great person. Many calm me a hypocrite and that how come i was able to fvck so many girls and expect to meet a decent woman to have a relationship with....

MY RESPONSE:

I said that i wasnt expecting it. BUT THAT I WAS NOT OUTHERE TO BE A FOOL.THAT I WAS A MAN. I did admit that if a great woman came acrooss it was a chance i was willing to make if she could take me for who i am and not for how many sluts i have been with. Not a Hypocrite but i believed man and woman are different and its not fvcking 100 sluts what makes a man a bad future husband and possibly for some woman aswell.

I do believe for woman alot of the romance and the drem gets destroyed by the time they have become so physical .....but thats my belief....

What matters really is her soul....my soul.... I love women, but inside of me there is alwasy a kid that needs affection and something more meaninful than sluts everyother night. Ofcourse in me there is also a wise grandfather that guides that kid in me so he doesnt huirt himself or takes the right path. There is also a testosterone freak that enjoys sex in every freaky way possible......

I also admitted that i can understand how a Nice, DECENT , Sweet lady can feel disgusted , or not attracted to a womanizer, or even run away.

So how does this relate to all this crap that i am all the sudden living with ...very simple .......


I am a womanizer with everyother girl outhere ...i enjoy it sometimes other times i dont. In fact last friday i kissed fived , hooked up with two at a frat party ......one of them was this guys girl .....who i was kissing infornt of him without him saying a word ...i didnt find out after the night was over that she was his girl..

People in my college know this side of me ..Why? I dont go around showin the kid i have inside to anyone....its a defensive protective mechanism i guess.. Me against the world.

THIS girl on the other hand ...brings a meaning so far ..its a potential candidate....that i like and could be possibly head over heels one day for , but I am not now. Its too early for that.


I am definitely not sitting on my butt waiting for her to make up her mind and i am dancin and living one day at a time.. but IQQI remeber this.....Tiburon has been deep many times and i do the right thing anygiving day even if it hurts...If this girl needs to be put in her place i am not afraid of doing it ....


Tiburon
 

Gonzalo

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Re: decisions

Originally posted by tiburon
.....Gonzalo has very good points..

Why of course he has...
 

prodigy1

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id probably back off a bit.

I was in a similar situation although she said she was over her ex, although still good friends. We went out for 3 months then she started saying she wasnt sure if she was over him.

Unless he is completely out of the picture i would NEXT her.


otherwise i think you will only get hurt later on. As DEKKA said after being with someone with no hangups you will find you dont need to be putting your self in that position. Although if you do continue to pursue her, it will learn a lot from your experience.
 

tiburon

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i Agree

The only way this is going to last any significant amount of time if he is not in the picture anylonger...honestly i dont think this should be a problem ..i am very confident in my game , but you never know...

Also i want to point out that this happens due to the fact guys like the one in my case are pvssys ..insecure of their lifes to afraid to put a definitely end to things ...just incase one day they find themselves alone......THERE IS NOT SUCH THINGS AS EXES AND BESTFRIENDS >>IT JUST DOESNT WORK.....THIS GIRL I AM TALKING TO IS IN DENIAL....i just want to see how it plays out.....

The funniest part is that i am in her same situation aswell....lol ...6 months ago i broke a 2 year relationship....My ex wants to get back with me, the only difference is as soon as i broke up with her i cut all communications....She wanted to be friends like before but i said no for the reasons stated above.....i been single mingling since then.....I was ENGAGED TO MY EX ....i saved my life!!! lol

Another difference is that i think she was way better person than my ex .

If at anypoint i see that her ex is way to deep inside her heart to evr get something thats worth a while ....I AM OUT...lol

Tiburon
 

tiburon

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So as we had accord

Yes as we had accord i decided to not call until the MONDAY after THANKSGIVING BREAK. The plan was for her IL to rise.

I have been realising my game was slacking ....meaning this girl was kind of getting to me ....so i decided to read with detail DOC LOVE Sytem and the Bible one more time to correct and see the mistakes i had been making and therefore due something about them........

Funny after doing this ...now i feel that the right decision is to NEXT this girl. Well for one thing this is a hard decision because it will be hurting myself ...i do like her ....but i have always emphasized doing the right thing...even if it kills you.

Well i know maybe alot of you guys hate DOC Loves ideas in the so famous "THE SYSTEM" but i agree with him in many of his ideas......for example:

You are the prize to be won.
Her IL is what really matters
Her attitude is essential for anything to workin the future.

now for what woke me up....

When a woman says he is just a friend ......she means that she has no attraction for him...low IL but as Doc Love says when a woman says that a male is her BEST FRIEND her interest level on the guy could not get any higher.

She refer to him as best friend before i found out he was her ex and after i found out aswelll just minutes before we got our act together and started to kiss pasionately but not in a slutty way.

Now it could had been she was inmature , maybe she didnt know what she was saying, Maybe her Il is rising for me ......but (and this is a big but.........)

i believe she is Unavailable Emotionally..........Dekka was kind of right .....and i admit that so far she seems like a great catch ...just at the wrong time and this makes a differences.....If iam the prize to be won the woman thats going to win me over i shouldnt have to compete for her IL or LOVE.......SAD but TRUE....

Cant try to be a **** and just have fun with her for two reasons.....I respect myself and my balls and word are at sake......
HEr personality is getting to me....


Its hard and its like maybe stupid for me to put trough this unnecesarry pain so early but You are only a MAN a true MAn if you keep your word, and respect yopurself. I dont see the ex dissapearing anytime soon .....THE BEST FIREND IS TOO STRONG OF A COMMENT...

Please i will appreciate your comments.......

Tiburon
 

NINJA PIMP

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*standing ovation*

Your eyes have really opened havent they?

She has to meet you halfway. Once you pursue past a certain point she withdraws. But once you hold back a little, she starts to pursue you!

Let her call your ass for a change!

You got more important shyt to do anyway, right?

Dont put up with low IL, particularly when the baggage she has from her "best friend" is whats keeping her from hooking up with you.

Dont worry about this one. She will come around, and if she doesnt, well that is really to bad for HER.
 

OpenMind

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It doesnt seem to me like she is emotionally unavailable.. seems like you are emtionally TOO available.. if you think she is a great catch than what do you have to lose? besides use this as alearning experiance for the next chick.. you like her... she obviously likes you.. she brings up the EX so she can test you and see if u are gonna wuss out and get all whiny, then she tests you hard again about being a womanizer.. she is available.. you need to stop thinking about it so much and just make it through to monday.. i gaurantee she will be sweating you so hard by then. I say this because i have been there.. i was the "best friend" until something better came along and i became the "get lost friend".... This is just the branch theory in effect..trust me Good luck!
 

tiburon

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Ok so i was all pissed of talking to...

OK so i was all pissed off talking to DJ Gonzalo on my cell ......about how i am about to next her. And as soon as i am about to walk into the service center in my shcool ..there she is studying.....(I really dont know if she does this on purpose now because i had only seen this chick six times before all year and i am always in the service center but i see her now almost every other day there.Sometimes i even avoid seen her to keep the challenge alive . I was So pissed because i do like the girl and the fact i had to next her along with all the **** in Cornell was just fustrating....but well i see her and finish my conversation on the phone with my roomate a few meters away from her. Then i decided to go SUPER DON JUAN ON HER ASS>.....so i stand up and dont pass infront of her.........buy a POWER BAR sit down and this is how the dailog went........

ME : Hi ( like something was bothering me ......)
Her: Hey how are you( smiling)
Me : Ok and yourself , how was your day( still in a bad mood)
Her: Alot of work and yours ( stiull smiling but realizing there si something wrog with me)
Me: Not bad ( same mood )
(Moment of silence she is smileing but i am looking at her and i smile with not much enthusiasm)
Her : You are very quiet today( looking like she wants to know what wrong)
Me ; I usually talk alot huh.( sarcastic remark)
Her; he y i got bback my chem prelim
Me: how did you do
Her; Well lets just say my good feeling wasnt that good...... i got average.
Me:average is ok
Her: I guess i am just average, average ..( smiling but kind of waiting for a compliment )
Me :(silence)
Me ; so when do you leave home
Her; tomorrow ,.....after my work.
Me : hey listen i want to make practice before 8 but have a good break;
Her : i hope you do too...
Me ;; I will.
Me : (satnd up leave give her a small kiss in the cheek with not much in int , and leave)
Her: Byee ...( like.... when am i going to see him again)


Thats sounds long but it was a 6 minute conversation....

I go to practice Jui jitsu .....and kick the fvck out of everyone .. i was super pissed......

Come back i go to the service center to pick another snack and i see her but she doesnt see me .....she is talking to another guy ....i walk without even looking at her .......not reacting at alll....buy the powerbar.......and talk to a hot girl in the desk for 1 minute getting her to smile and leave....now i didnt even look back so i dont know if she saw this.........


OPENMIND: I really dont like this whole bestfriend thing ..and you have made me give it some consideration about completely nexting her but i am still thinking about it....and i dont know how much testing she is doing ..especially by bringing her ex to the top of the conversation but it is a possibility.

One lass thing when i got home i recieved an unknown phone call....So far the only unknown phone calls i have recieved are from her......3 days ago.

Tiburon
 

OpenMind

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I know you dont like the best friend thing, but just forget it, because the minute she can read that you dont like it you come across as weak..and she will see right through you and your high interest in her. forget that she even brought it up ever..like i said before... when she brings it up change the subject.. the most important thing you can do is let some time go by without contacting her because not only will this raise her interest level in you..i will lower yours in her.. and these little things like the best friend shyt will not bother you as much and you will be square on your game again... good luck
 

OpenMind

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One other thing i wanted to point out... if you had blown her off the other night or at least rescheduled for a later date, her shyt tests may has lessoned. The more available you are the more this best friend thing will appear. thats why i said disappear for a week.. when she talks or see you next trust me that these tests will ease up.. when their interest level is high, the tests lighten up and the woman make things nice and easy for you.. good luck!
 

tiburon

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My friend and his bet

So DJ GONZALO and I are best friends over 6 months at Cornell University.....Imagine all we do when we talk is aboout women...infact we met in a computer Lab were he saw me reading articles to become what i am today MR CASANOVA at Cornell.


So as you all know i been macking to the girl i talk about on this post..but me and gonzalo always share DJ advice since i am a perfectionalist and i always try to make evything bettrer every time. Funny we were making bets about getting numbers and a bet came up about me not being able to ask anyone for their opinions about the situation i am in...........

I liked the bet ..because for one thing ........it tests my self control and for another ..i believe we need to make our own decisions and once we have the knowledge we need to stop asking or reading others advice and stop caring what others think....

Dont get me wrong .. i believe a fathers advice is gold and the advice in the forum "sometimes" its gold..but there is a point we need to do this on our own ..without forum ...withouth friends help..without or father's advice..etc...


IF You are succesful on your own ...your confidence will grow......never worry if you might be fvcking up........by getting advice here unfortunately many are getting used to get their problems solved ..like the kids doing the hw for you or giving you the answer in middle school..

I hope some of you try this aswell..even tough i know i am not very affected by whatothers think..or advice given here...i belive in this and this is why i took his bet ......

So this is my last reply to this post until 2004 because thats when the bet ends.......i wont be reading this post until 2004 aswell. You guys have my word.

as far as the girl comes.......


Well that same night i talked to her she send me a mesage ..saying she wanted to see me that night or the next day before she left......ohhh and that she had a compliment for me....

I got her message today so i emailed her after i knew she was gone.......saying pretty much ..have a good break........but not being rude.


She replied the same night at 12 am but sounde more seriously.....i tought her Il had gone a bit down but now i think she is just hidding it.....She refer to me as "Roberto" instead of "Robert" as she has always done it in every email..and then she ended her email by writin "Mich" instead of "Michelle"as she always does.


Well guys ill tell you the end of this story on 2004


Kepp being DJs

Tiburon
 

OpenMind

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Good luck tiburon.. you seem to have the skills to get this woman and i hope everything works out for the best. dont forget to fill us in on the situation january 1 because i want to be the first to know!
 
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