Mission: Help Luke Sywalker get laid before he turns 31!

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I am a religious man.

I just came back from a Bible study and there were these two Asian hb 5's there that just visited the church for the first time. I intended to talk to them but here's what happened:

- As I got up from my chair, when people were starting to socialise, my mind focused on a guy hugging a girl there intimately, and I thought, gee, I dont have a chance here. This other guy looked more taller, bolder and attracted than I do and has all the social proof.

- I went towards the food table, another person put a bunch of bibles on my hand, and I was supposed to drop them off in another room. I got away from the group so doing.

- Another girl walked by in the hallway. Basically, I just folded and went on home and even though there was a logical thing to say, such as, hi, you are new here, my name is so and so, I felt that it would come across as unnatural and it would go bad and felt it easier to just go home.

ANALYSIS:

- Either I simply wasn't ready to socialise.

- I've let a flood of negative thoughts enter my mind when I saw a guy with the other girl there, and compared myself to him.


SOLUTION:

- Recycle - try another group or place to sarge.

- Deal with the negative thoughts - and have a counter-strategy when they occur. Do not listen to them, do not give in to them.
 

Hawke

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That's great your noticing what your doing, and how your responding to it. I honestly wish i could have been like that 10 years ago...

Negative thoughts, i love them. I love the way they try to say you can't do something and how great it feels when you prove them wrong. As long as you keep going the way you are, being aware and being ready to face those negative thoughts, you'll do fine.
 

GQ_Confidence_1

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Luke,

On a scale of 1-10, what's your day to day quality of life like? I think for a lot of people in your situation, the problem isn't necessarily girls, it's quality of life related.

Do you have alot of things to look forward to in life (away from girls)?

Do you visualize your success? Can you see it in your mind, going out on a great date, having a great time, you go somewhere, you close the job? You've got to be able to see it in your mind before it happens in real life.
 

Skydiver43127

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This is just absurd. Hire a hooker and be done with the whole thing. It's a simple enough problem.

Once you've got this handled you can take your time to put your love life at place. The way you're doing things - making everything complicated and a big deal, is really not very productive.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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I've been offered a free trip to England (whether I'm reimbursed, or mailed plane tickets or accomodation is not known at this stage), in order to go to this institution that is designed to help people, like me, get with women, they even have a sex surrogacy on it. Virtually an offer to travel to London to get laid for free with travelling and accomodation expenses paid. (the catch is it may be some 'documentary' and I may be in a movie)

But, let's see if I can get with local girls here first.
 
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GQ_Confidence_1 said:
Luke,

On a scale of 1-10, what's your day to day quality of life like? I think for a lot of people in your situation, the problem isn't necessarily girls, it's quality of life related.
It's easy to make it a 10 if I want to, all I have to do is praise the Lord and sing out loud and then I start feeling good, and things just fall into place.

There are too many things to do on a daily basis if I want as I have a wide range of interests, so there is no problem with quality of life.

GQ_Confidence_1 said:
Do you have alot of things to look forward to in life (away from girls)?
Of course.

GQ_Confidence_1 said:
Do you visualize your success? Can you see it in your mind, going out on a great date, having a great time, you go somewhere, you close the job? You've got to be able to see it in your mind before it happens in real life.
I always thought if you visualised success you jinyxned yourself by being presumptious. I suppose I'm wrong then with that superstition.
 
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Skydiver43127 said:
This is just absurd. Hire a hooker and be done with the whole thing. It's a simple enough problem.
Feel free to bring this idea up again later in the year - like around October - November or something. As stated in another thread, this idea is not recognised at this time, and besides, if I were to get laid before 31, then all 'free' avenues should be pursued first - after all, that could be done at any time by picking up the phone and making some arrangement, no challenge.

Skydiver43127 said:
Once you've got this handled you can take your time to put your love life at place. The way you're doing things - making everything complicated and a big deal, is really not very productive.
I'd rather go to England for free then spend money on a hooker.

Spidey_007 claims that he doesn't feel like he's lost his virginity despite going with 150 different hookers, or going with a new hooker every week since he was 19 y/o. I"ve also read accounts of at least two other people who claim that going to a hooker - and they've said the experience is no where near how real sex with a willing partner is going to feel like.

I've also read accounts of people who lost their virginity with a casual hook-up from the internet on 'sympathy sex', and saying that after that was gone, they still didn't feel 'different' after losing their virginity.

The point here, is not just losing your virginity, but being in a state where you can attract any woman you want, and if hiring a hooker and losing virginity changed anyone from an AFC to a Don Juan overnight, then it would be a different world. (smile)
 

Taviii

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Mate post a picture of yourself! Then we will now if looks are the reason for your insuccess with women.

If we know that then we could make a better plan for your improvement, and also it will be a sign of confidence that you are not afraid of what people may think.
 

tryin 2 play

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Hate to break it to you, but even when you do lose your virginity to a "willing" girl, you will not feel like a different man, i promise. You will soon realize that sex is sex and thats it, really.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Bvbidd

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tryin 2 play said:
Hate to break it to you, but even when you do lose your virginity to a "willing" girl, you will not feel like a different man, i promise. You will soon realize that sex is sex and thats it, really.
It's not going to improve his life in anyway but he'll get to experience something everybody else already did over a decade before him.
 
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Taviii said:
Mate post a picture of yourself! Then we will now if looks are the reason for your insuccess with women.

If we know that then we could make a better plan for your improvement, and also it will be a sign of confidence that you are not afraid of what people may think.
Looks are not my reason for insuccess with women. I've had a professoinal dating consultant, that I paid $ 99 US give a run-down on looks, from this site: http://www.seduceandconquer.com - the 'complete package'.
I have a good idea of how to maximize myself to look attractive.

The online pics of myself were taken very poorly, and have not in general been an asset at online dating sites, although I find that if I have contacted people first and play the 'numbers game' then looks do not factor that big of a deal.

Generally, the tips were being clean shaven, having a short haircut, wearing a white shirt and black pants, keep buttons on shirt button down by two or three buttons, have a swiss army watch, wear good black flat toe shoes, and roll the sleeves up.

Of course, I feel rather wierd unbuttoning my shirt, as I'm used to wearing a vest under the shirt, and keeping the shirt buttoned up, or wearing more clothes as opposed to less - I feel more 'exposed' when I'm buttoned too far down and sleeves are rolled up too much - or look rather worldly.

However, you also have 'tone of voice', and being confident with approaches with one or multiple girls at one time, which are also other issues apart from looks.
 

Bvbidd

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The tips were right on, always wear less instead of more. This is not the year 1800, get with the times. And stop using the word worldly.

The reason for your insuccess is you think it's hard or difficult.. ass if you have to do something to earn your right and the opposite sex does not like men.. that's all wrong.

You have a d!ck right?
Check, see if you do. You do? Alright, your clean and normal looking right? Alright check.

Now go have sex with some chick. Your mindset is ****ed up. You don't need to do anything beyond the above. She wants your d!ck. Now go use it NOW! (Do not rape, just go for it.)
 

SELF-MASTERY

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I think that it is bad advice to give a guy like this "go out and just fk" someone advice. Dude find your female equal, have a relationship with her, and then have sex with her. I really don't think that you are at the stage where you are going to jump from LAME -to- GAME. To steal from player_supreme, this guy needs a "starter ho."

Good Luck

--- Everyone doesn't have it in them to actively sarge.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Skydiver43127

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Spidey_007 claims that he doesn't feel like he's lost his virginity despite going with 150 different hookers, or going with a new hooker every week since he was 19 y/o. I"ve also read accounts of at least two other people who claim that going to a hooker - and they've said the experience is no where near how real sex with a willing partner is going to feel like.
Hell, I don't have the foggies idea how you can lose something you do not have. Women have virginity, they lose it by having sex. I can only assume your "mental virginity" can be removed the same way. tryin 2 play is correct - sex is just sex.
 

DJ4Life

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hey luke

being DJ, unlike what most awakened AFCs think, is NOT the hardest task in the world

personally i think there are two most important things that attract women like no other: confidence and humor. yes good looks and money and a nice car and all the other stuff help too, but if you wanna get one night laid those two are the things that will get you inside her pants, and furthermore those are the two things that will initial a first attraction, and if you do it right, develop it into a ltr

most afc fail with women because they have neither confidence nor humor, or they have one of the two but not the other, but you need both to succeed

now on to the part HOW you get them

humor: there's a good reason why humor sticks women to you like a glue at first impression. we all know no one likes to be around moody depressing people, because of the fact they have negative influence on us and make us sad and depressing too, and who the hell likes to be depressed?

humor is like a mirror that shows people how you view and live your life. in most cases, people with good humor have happy lives, and women love to be a part of your wonderful life hoping their life would get wonderful and magical too

imo i think EVERYONE has a sense of humor, it's just we all have different kinds. so if you have a fairly good life (nice house, good friends, close family, etc, try to neglect all the negative aspects of your life here), you have a good sense of humor. and if you really do not have any sense of humor, you can easily develop some by watching comedies or read jokes. but the most important thing is live positively, think on the bright sides, be happy: if you are depressed about your failures and wrong doings, no jokes or comedian can make you laugh, and therefore logically your humor is also dry

sometimes an afc do have a happy life and therefore great sense of humor, but he can't show it to the hb 8/9 he's around with because of his fear and nervousness, and that's why you need confidence

confidence: confidence and humor are relevant and partially linked to one another, if you have confidence it's very easy to develop humor, and it also goes the other way around

similar to humor, confidence also show people what your life is. confident people, again, mostly have happy, accomplished lives. confidence can be harder to get than humor, because of the fact it requires you to be successful or accomplished (in your own perspective and standard) in lives. but to get confidence faster, you can set our own goals to a lower standard: get a car, earn $2000 this month, do 500 push ups this week, etc, you will be proud of completing your own personal goals and your confidence will come out naturally

there you have it. but if you havent realized, if you are successul in life, humor and confidence come naturally, which mean women come naturally into your arms too, which is why youth these days should really spend more time on self improvements and becoming better individuals, than chasing chicks aimlessly while being afc and fail miserably, well, that's what i think personally anyways

there are already a million other posts out here that can explain a lot better than i do, but i hope i help in the least bit
 
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DJ4Life said:
imo i think EVERYONE has a sense of humor, it's just we all have different kinds. so if you have a fairly good life (nice house, good friends, close family, etc, try to neglect all the negative aspects of your life here), you have a good sense of humor. and if you really do not have any sense of humor, you can easily develop some by watching comedies or read jokes. but the most important thing is live positively, think on the bright sides, be happy: if you are depressed about your failures and wrong doings, no jokes or comedian can make you laugh, and therefore logically your humor is also dry
Thanks for your input. I'd also like to make the following comments from other sources that I have read as follows:

Easily develop by watching comedies or reading jokes? I've tried looking at comedy and thought for the most part it was just stupid.

The book, "How to Succeed with Women' talks about humour. And in fact, describes using humour to joke and make the woman feel special, by making 'creative misinterpretations' of her environment.

For example, if the girl is a parking attendant, she'd be called 'the parking goddess where people pay homage to her', or some crap like that. However, I've felt ackward with this type of humour, because I only believe in one God, and feel uncomfortable using the term goddess.

But, on amazon.com book reviews of 'How to Succeed with Women' suggest that girls like being flirted with and called 'goddesses' and that it's a cool flirting technique.

But the point of the book is not just to be humorous, but there HAS to be a romantic twist in the humour for it to be effective. So, you'd sort of have to play up some 'nickname or role' for the girl that would put her in a special light and kid around with that. But, calling virtually every girl your flirting with an XYZ 'goddess' sounds wierd to me as a flirting strategy for humour.

On PRIMING DATES, the book just suggests to have fun for at least 40 seconds within the 75 minute period, as opposed to overdominating the date with jokes or humor - but of course, if you can have fun, by all means, have fun (according to that book).

The S&C program (Seduce and Conquer) defines humour as making a sarcastic comment about the girl or the environment - and employs mainly sarcasm, ****y comments for humour.

DJ4life said:
confidence: confidence and humor are relevant and partially linked to one another, if you have confidence it's very easy to develop humor, and it also goes the other way around
Ok, so if you are confident, then you'll likely be humorous, or is it the other way around?

DJ4LIFE said:
similar to humor, confidence also show people what your life is. confident people, again, mostly have happy, accomplished lives. confidence can be harder to get than humor, because of the fact it requires you to be successful or accomplished (in your own perspective and standard) in lives. but to get confidence faster, you can set our own goals to a lower standard: get a car, earn $2000 this month, do 500 push ups this week, etc, you will be proud of completing your own personal goals and your confidence will come out naturally
But, confidence in life does not necessarily translate to confidence in women.

I'm sure there are plenty of AFC's that have good jobs, cars, or may be confident business people, but it still doesn't translate with success with women. Success has to do with luck as well, and sometimes crap happens in life.

I've considered this post, and would like to know how people creatively use humour when flirting with girls, and/or, use of standard canned lines when flirting - any book with that. I hear the authors of 'How to Succeed with Women' have a sequel book out called 'How to Talk to Women', anybody read that?
 

Tazman

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I can relate man, I'm not the kind of person that can just talk about nothing for extended periods of time with someone I don't know, unless they're carrying the conversation. Especially with women because I honestly don't care about most of the stuff they talk about (could also be the women that I've been exposed to).

I recommend you talk to women you aren't interested in and just practice talking to them and carrying conversations. That's like 75% of what will help you, then you can concentrate on things like escalating and making moves, and not necessarily in that order because if you get more out of your assumed practice then you intended, you can just go with the flow.

There's really no substitute for experience, you're going to have to put yourself in situations that are uncomfortable and simply deal with it the best way you can. Just make sure you learn from your mistakes and not care too much about what other people think, it's the only way. My best moments have been when I trully didn't care about the outcome, you just kind of act on impulse and let things develop on their own, like when you're hanging out with your male friends. I've attracted women without even realizing it consciously, but when I "try" I'm usually disappointed (most of the time it's been a lack of doing anything).
 
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