... Missed the message.

[European-DJ]

We all know how easy it is to give advice when it isn't your situation, and how hard it is to spot or realize signs when you yourself are in the situation.
So I was hoping to get some response, and your take on the following, just in a overall objective way.

The girl I have knows for about 3 months, we chat often, and the tone is always fun - I have made out with her everyone I have seen her.

I wanted to know what your take on this story was:

After a reunion, we hit the club. At the club, I met this one girls friends (a girl I honestly like a bit - they were not part of the reunión).
After chatting with her friends, they told me that she would actually arrive at the club, within 30 min.

She arrived, and we sat for 3 hours laughing, and having a blast - at one time I mentioned she should come over to my house later, but I forgot this during the evening.
So time hit 3A.M, and I told her I had a blast, and was going home now. And that it was nice seeing her again, to which she answerd:
"Oh, so now I'm not getting invited to your place anyway?".
I was caught off guard, and simply told her that u was going home now, and she could was welcome to follow me.

It was pretty obvious what she wanted, but I simply had the greatest walk home - never laughed that much with anyone - so when we came home, I couldn't get myself to have sex with her, I couldn't even initiate it..

Next morning we headed out the door the same way, again we laughed a bit, and said goodbye.

About 10 hours later I messages her on Facebook, just letting her know I had a good time.
This was 2 days ago, I haven't received any answer, and I know she has been online since then (Facebook alows you to see it).

I don't know what I should do, but I was planing to write her again this Friday; but should I act like she didn't ignore my message, or should I mention it?

Example 1:
"Ignored.. Well I guess I shouldn't push forward with the lunch plans the 15th?" (We talked about going to lunch there.

Example 2:
"Hi, what's up, hitting the club tonight?"

I'm looking forward to some response, thanks guys!

 

[Packers2010]

sounds to me like someone has oneitis? if i was you. i would just leave the message the way it is and mac other girls for a bit and let her come to you.

by the sounds of it. you didn't have sex when she stayed over no?

if you did. great. just leave her be. if not. well... your gunna have a bad time casing this girl. so stop

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

You did not provide details of your conversations, so there may be something that was said that will tell us more of the story.

That said, I see two mistakes you made here:

1) You forgot she was to come home with you. She clearly wanted to come bang you. You should have kept that in mind, "it's on." Later, when you when to go and she asked if she was coming too, a simple, "of course" and grabbing her hand and leading her out of the club would work. The problem is you probably acme off to her as if you had totally ignored/forgotten that she was to come home with you. You basically told her she was low priority and you had low interest, whether you realize it or not. Then, when you agreed she should come with you, she's thinking you are seeing her as a last resort. She asked to go, you complied (followed her frame), and now you are being lead to your place by her, basically (it was her idea, not yours).

2) You didn't bang her. Because she initiated going back to your place after you forgot, she saw you as (a) probably just interested in casual sex and not seeing her as relationship material but (b) lacking the balls to make the ONS happen / know how to do it smoothly. That's two strikes against you. Then when you didn't bang her that showed her you definitely have no balls, no sexual confidence, no interest in her overall. Strike three.

And now you message her and wonder why she hasn't replied?

Review:

Forgetting she was to come home with you showed her you were not all that interested in her.

Agreeing when she asked if she could come convinced her you could consider a fun bang, though this was her frame and she's thinking that's probably all you'll be good for. She shifted from interested to seeing what she can get out of this one evening.

Not banging her was nail in the coffin. Besides a few giggles, you've added nothing to this girl's life. You've shown you are not interested enough to remember she wanted to bang, you later agree to go home with her (says cheap sex to her and she probably wanted just that by then), and then you cannot even deliver at the end.

Now she's done with you. You gave her only a little to pursue in the short-term, blew that, and now there's nothing for her, in her mind, to pursue any further.

 

[alpha_ash]

Actually I think it's the opposite of what halfpuahalfafc believes. You showed that you aren't only interested in sex, you showed that she isn't the most important part of the night, and you didn't make her priority. Now isn't that we are all trying to do? To not obviously show that we are into the girl?

 

[Greasy Pig]

Actually I think it's the opposite of what halfpuahalfafc believes. You showed that you aren't only interested in sex, you showed that she isn't the most important part of the night, and you didn't make her priority. Now isn't that we are all trying to do? To not obviously show that we are into the girl?

That's if you're still trying to seal the deal. This was a rolled gold lay the OP missed out on.
If she's good to go, game goes out the window. You just get that chick alone and pound the puzz.

 

[alpha_ash]

That's if you're still trying to seal the deal. This was a rolled gold lay the OP missed out on.
If she's good to go, game goes out the window. You just get that chick alone and pound the puzz.

Haha thanks for clearing it up.

 

[Purefilth]

saying you had a great time doesnt really warrant a response - if you want the lay, i wouldnt reccomend a second club date. she knows where you live - invite her over.

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

That's if you're still trying to seal the deal. This was a rolled gold lay the OP missed out on.
If she's good to go, game goes out the window. You just get that chick alone and pound the puzz.

Exactly.

If a girl is good to go, at that point your job is to not fcuk it up.

No need to act disinterested or too aloof.

Don't act clingy either.

Just play it cool, kino a bit to keep the tension up, and bounce (you decide when but better to do it before closing time). "Hey, let's get out of here."

If a woman has shown she's ready for sex (and you want it too, presumably), if you don't do what it takes to make it happen she'll be sorely disappointed.

Further, she put herself out there sexually and you failed to give it to her. Now she is having regrets about making her intentions known.

Also, she probably believes you think you can now have her whenever you want.

If she is interested in you in a BF way, you might still be able to lure her in, but your game will need to be tight, not needy, and try not to chase too hard (if at all).

If she was only interested in a ONS, it's probably over.