Mind Games That Girls Play

[jamesfromhouston]

Hi gents. We often talk about our strategies/approach/games we play on women. My experience with some "gamey" women this year has made me curious as to the sorts of games they play on us. Would be cool to exchange some personal experience as to the mind games that girls play. So we will all be more informed. I'll start:

1) Bait Texting. I met a dutch girl earlier in the year. For months, she will constantly text me thirsty texts (suggesting that we would hangout and f*ck) but would never actually meet up with me. An excuse always, always came up. Yet she had been acting high interest, texting me all the time, sending me video messages, audio messages, pictures. I wanted to lay that one so badly that eventually I unknowingly became her texting buddy. I fell into an endless chase position. Turns out she was only after my attention because nothing ever happened. Now that I have withdrawn, every now and then she will still try to bait me.

2) Hot & Cold. This one is reported from my recent thread. Summary: Been seeing a girl who was very enthusiastic from the get go. Very bubbly and nice to hangout and date. After we started having sex, she did a 180! It was actually mind boggling at first. (So I guess her trick worked). She stopped sending me pictures, stopped initiating texts/hangouts, took ages to respond my texts and just seemed less interested overall. I would have concluded that the interest level was low with her but she would always say yes when we I asked her out and she would still f*ck me. She seemed happy/nice in person whenever we caught up. Finally, on one drunken night at a friend's party, she revealed to me that she feels I am playing her because I've been f*cking her but have not told her what we are yet. And she has spoken to her girl friends about it and her girl friends advised her to be cold to me to get me to commit. So it was all a tactic to get me to settle with her. We still hangout now, and she's still doing the same thing.

Would love to hear from you guys too, what are your experiences?

 

[Willie Naylor]

Hi gents. We often talk about our strategies/approach/games we play on women. My experience with some "gamey" women this year has made me curious as to the sorts of games they play on us. Would be cool to exchange some personal experience as to the mind games that girls play. So we will all be more informed. I'll start:

2) Hot & Cold. Finally, on one drunken night at a friend's party, she revealed to me that she feels I am playing her because I've been f*cking her but have not told her what we are yet.

Definitely don't take the bait on this one. As soon as you tell her you want something more, she'll bounce. I know you know this. Just thinking out loud.

One thing, from my experience, that I now know is a sign to pull back a little bit, is when a girl you've been casually seeing for a month or two starts semi-lovebombing, telling you she's telling her family and friends all about you.

If you get a gut feeling about a girl and it isn't good - start to withdraw.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Well written @jamesfromhouston. I've experienced both scenarios as well. The answer I've found that works best for #1 (which is also called breadcrumbs) is to change the conversation to something non-sexual. Let's say she's flaked once and didn't counteroffer, or I've otherwise been turned off by her, but then a couple days later she sends a nude with a hyper sexual text about sucking my c0ck. I would respond with something like, 'that reminds me, I need to buy some toothpaste lol'. I'm being playful, having fun with her, teasing her indirectly. She really has to work a different angle if she wants my sexual attention, and the only angle I'd provide is her coming over, or maybe telling her where I'm going out if she happens to ask, so that she has an opportunity to find me out. I wouldn't go out of my way since she burned that bridge.

For #2 it sounds like you didn't hulk smash fuuck her hard enough, otherwise she'd be initiating it or dropping very obvious hints that she wanted more. It was most likely fairly normal sex to her or maybe there was a general incompatibility. A woman that loves how you fuuck her will not hesitate to let you know just how you make her feel. Or she may have been higher maintenance due to a natural inner insecurity. Personally I no longer bother with women that aren't that into it. I want her scratching and screaming my name as I carve it in her guts, anything less is just not my style so I don't bother with it.

One that I would add is,
The Long Grudge / The Silent Treatment
This is when a woman doesn't get what she wants from you, so she makes it very obvious that she's upset with you. It's a form of emotional extortion. She may instantly go cold and not initiate texts, or in person she may give you dirty looks and talk to you as if you just killed her dog or fuucked her mom. This is basically a huge dare, and some women have enough pride to hold onto it for YEARS. They're daring you to be a man and stand by your principles, because deep down they're insecure and only feel comfortable with a man that will do backflips for them (which is an insecure man, like attracts like). They're basically demanding you do backflips too.

Note that this could also just be a woman standing by her own principles and it's just general incompatibility, the key difference is a woman standing by her principles won't be upset with you. She'll be happy to call you a friend, and will still be polite.

The solution to this one should be obvious, a man doesn't waiver from his principles. He's spent countless hours constructing these pillars in the fortress of his mind, and has critiqued their design endlessly, to the point that he is sure they align with who he is, down to his very core; they've become no brainers. When a woman indirectly dares him to do backflips or otherwise go against his principles, he simply feels natural aversion and shifts his attention to women that are happy to receive him in any capacity. The more grounded a man is in his principles, the more effortless this process is, until it's second nature.

I've had women come crawling back after 5, 10, even 15 years, breaking the silence, being sweet, and practically jumping into my bed. I've also had some that came back as a probe and to DOUBLE DOWN on their long grudge, even after sex. I suspect some will hold it to the bitter end.

If a woman is ever upset by my romantic inaction, she becomes invisible (out of self respect, not out of anger). A woman that attracts me is one that's patient and flexible, always happy to see me and talk to me. I tend to be impossible to upset and so I naturally attract the same; like attracts like.

 

[jimwho]

Good stuff gentleman.. I'm still learning.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

One that I would add is,
The Long Grudge / The Silent Treatment
This is when a woman doesn't get what she wants from you, so she makes it very obvious that she's upset with you. It's a form of emotional extortion. She may instantly go cold and not initiate texts, or in person she may give you dirty looks and talk to you as if you just killed her dog or fuucked her mom. This is basically a huge dare, and some women have enough pride to hold onto it for YEARS. They're daring you to be a man and stand by your principles, because deep down they're insecure and only feel comfortable with a man that will do backflips for them (which is an insecure man, like attracts like). They're basically demanding you do backflips too.

Note that this could also just be a woman standing by her own principles and it's just general incompatibility, the key difference is a woman standing by her principles won't be upset with you. She'll be happy to call you a friend, and will still be polite.

The solution to this one should be obvious, a man doesn't waiver from his principles. He's spent countless hours constructing these pillars in the fortress of his mind, and has critiqued their design endlessly, to the point that he is sure they align with who he is, down to his very core; they've become no brainers. When a woman indirectly dares him to do backflips or otherwise go against his principles, he simply feels natural aversion and shifts his attention to women that are happy to receive him in any capacity. The more grounded a man is in his principles, the more effortless this process is, until it's second nature.

I've had women come crawling back after 5, 10, even 15 years, breaking the silence, being sweet, and practically jumping into my bed. I've also had some that came back as a probe and to DOUBLE DOWN on their long grudge, even after sex. I suspect some will hold it to the bitter end.

If a woman is ever upset by my romantic inaction, she becomes invisible (out of self respect, not out of anger). A woman that attracts me is one that's patient and flexible, always happy to see me and talk to me. I tend to be impossible to upset and so I naturally attract the same; like attracts like.

I like what you wrote here. The timing is perfect because of what happened a night ago for me. So I had been experiencing the "the silent treatment". There was a girl I had met, 2 years ago. We hooked up a few times. Things were going well. Then suddenly she starts acting aloof and cold, I think it was to do with the fact that I was trying to turn it into a fwb thing or some other reason that I don't know. I tried to hit her up a few times but she would flake me. And started freezing me out. So I just stepped away instead of reacting or chasing. A month ago she starts to hit me up again, and a night ago, she asked me to book a hotel room and skip the dinners, let's just f*CK. It was some monkey sex, she wore lingerie as an Xmas surprise for me. She's back in the loop again haha. The thing is if I had been too needy, or trying hard to fix the silent treatment I was going through rather than act icy cool; things could have been gone by now.

 

[bat soup]

Hi gents. We often talk about our strategies/approach/games we play on women. My experience with some "gamey" women this year has made me curious as to the sorts of games they play on us. Would be cool to exchange some personal experience as to the mind games that girls play. So we will all be more informed. I'll start:

1) Bait Texting. I met a dutch girl earlier in the year. For months, she will constantly text me thirsty texts (suggesting that we would hangout and f*ck) but would never actually meet up with me. An excuse always, always came up. Yet she had been acting high interest, texting me all the time, sending me video messages, audio messages, pictures. I wanted to lay that one so badly that eventually I unknowingly became her texting buddy. I fell into an endless chase position. Turns out she was only after my attention because nothing ever happened. Now that I have withdrawn, every now and then she will still try to bait me.

2) Hot & Cold. This one is reported from my recent thread. Summary: Been seeing a girl who was very enthusiastic from the get go. Very bubbly and nice to hangout and date. After we started having sex, she did a 180! It was actually mind boggling at first. (So I guess her trick worked). She stopped sending me pictures, stopped initiating texts/hangouts, took ages to respond my texts and just seemed less interested overall. I would have concluded that the interest level was low with her but she would always say yes when we I asked her out and she would still f*ck me. She seemed happy/nice in person whenever we caught up. Finally, on one drunken night at a friend's party, she revealed to me that she feels I am playing her because I've been f*cking her but have not told her what we are yet. And she has spoken to her girl friends about it and her girl friends advised her to be cold to me to get me to commit. So it was all a tactic to get me to settle with her. We still hangout now, and she's still doing the same thing.

Would love to hear from you guys too, what are your experiences?

In both cases you should pay attention to what her actions tell you and disregard her words.

The first one is an attention whoare, the second one just wants sex.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Women have their own game.

No they are just far far better at it than men

Primarily because hot ones know they don't have to exert anywhere near the same amount of effort men do to replace options and there is always options...... it's abundance mentality in its purest form

In reference to OP most hot women understand the game inside out mainly because of the above ^^

You can't beat them you can only try to use their emotional instability to out manevoure them ...... create a checkmate situation if you like

The second you get sucked into playing the games you become her pawn .....most women enjoy this because they feed off knowing they are so desirable men cannot resist

a few to watch out for

• emotional distance
• flaking
• Indecisiveness
• hot cold
• Leveraging sex
• Jealously plays
• Physcotic episodes disguised as play
• Mentioning EX's all the time

 

[Bingo-Player]

So they have games?
Women have game. Trust that

Yes but they are just basic psychological dynamics

The same stuff they use works the other way around too if you find a girl that's interested enough in you trust me ..... the problem is most average women have 20x the options that average men do and that's the biggest problem

 

[BDDazza]

1) Bait Texting. I met a dutch girl earlier in the year. For months, she will constantly text me thirsty texts (suggesting that we would hangout and f*ck) but would never actually meet up with me. An excuse always, always came up. Yet she had been acting high interest, texting me all the time, sending me video messages, audio messages, pictures. I wanted to lay that one so badly that eventually I unknowingly became her texting buddy. I fell into an endless chase position. Turns out she was only after my attention because nothing ever happened. Now that I have withdrawn, every now and then she will still try to bait me.

If the conversation isn't leading towards meeting in person then it's a wasted effort. She is leading you on, using you for attention and then withdrawing at the last moment just before the date, then she's repeating the cycle. Break the cycle and stop trying to meet with her because I guarantee she has no intention to meet with you. Put the ball back into her court and tell her that things are not progressing fast enough and to contact you when you're ready to meet. Then end the communication.

2) Hot & Cold. This one is reported from my recent thread. Summary: Been seeing a girl who was very enthusiastic from the get go. Very bubbly and nice to hangout and date. After we started having sex, she did a 180! It was actually mind boggling at first. (So I guess her trick worked). She stopped sending me pictures, stopped initiating texts/hangouts, took ages to respond my texts and just seemed less interested overall. I would have concluded that the interest level was low with her but she would always say yes when we I asked her out and she would still f*ck me. She seemed happy/nice in person whenever we caught up. Finally, on one drunken night at a friend's party, she revealed to me that she feels I am playing her because I've been f*cking her but have not told her what we are yet. And she has spoken to her girl friends about it and her girl friends advised her to be cold to me to get me to commit. So it was all a tactic to get me to settle with her. We still hangout now, and she's still doing the same thing.

Would love to hear from you guys too, what are your experiences?

She has put you in the friends with benefits zone, she stopped initiating because she doesn't want to get attached to you. I wouldn't over complicate the situation, keep in contact and continue to hang out with her without the obligation of being her boyfriend - She seems okay with that!

 

[darksprezzatura]

Girls don't play any games.

Guys delude themselves by not following some simple rules:

- Look at their actions, not words
- Interested girls make things easy

 

[BDDazza]

Girls don't play any games.

Guys delude themselves by not following some simple rules:

Aren't rules for games, no?

 

[Zimbabwe]

1. “Look At Me” (While I Don’t Look At You)“
2. Feigning Disinterest (AKA: Chase Me Some More)
3. “Invest in Me” Games (Ie.: I’m Higher Value, Pay The Difference)
4. Delay Responses Games
5. Wait For Me Games
6. Cancel The Date Games
7. Prove Yourself to Me Games (AKA: Dance Monkey Dance)
8. Sex Withholding Games
9. Damsel in Distress Games
10. “I’m Not That Kind of Girl” Game

 

[anonymous12345]

This shiit is funny af. 'em crazy.

It would be nice with a list of counter measures to the games in @Zimbabwe's hard earned list. Something that is measures to the current project, not merely giving up and returning to plate spinning.

 

[Don Dark Horse]

Thanks, gents. This thread is absolutely golden.

It would be nice with a list of counter measures to the games in @Zimbabwe's hard earned list. Something that is measures to the current project, not merely giving up and returning to plate spinning.

Hmm... Maybe some of the veterans can shed some light on this.
I don't have much to rebut those games with besides for "put her on ice". The counter game I see is simply to not play. I'll give it a try tho.

1. “Look At Me” (While I Don’t Look At You)“ -> Look at other girls in front of her.
2. Feigning Disinterest (AKA: Chase Me Some More) -> Stop chasing, on ICE!
3. “Invest in Me” Games (Ie.: I’m Higher Value, Pay The Difference) -> Give her tasks to do, instead of you doing tasks for her.
4. Delay Responses Games -> Take longer to respond or don't respond at all. Leave her on read.
5. Wait For Me Games -> Never show up on time and then make her wait. Although, I would prefer to just drop this plate than do that.
6. Cancel The Date Games -> Next, if she doesn't apologise and attempt to reschedule. Shoot the line "how you gna make this up to me?"
7. Prove Yourself to Me Games (AKA: Dance Monkey Dance) -> Just don't dance? Another **** test. Be playful.
8. Sex Withholding Games -> ICE.
9. Damsel in Distress Games -> ICE.
10. “I’m Not That Kind of Girl” Game -> Lol, sure she isn't. Pretend to believe her.

@Zimbabwe thoughts on this?

 

[Zimbabwe]

Thanks, gents. This thread is absolutely golden.



Hmm... Maybe some of the veterans can shed some light on this.
I don't have much to rebut those games with besides for "put her on ice". The counter game I see is simply to not play. I'll give it a try tho.

1. “Look At Me” (While I Don’t Look At You)“ -> Look at other girls in front of her. Agree with this one
2. Feigning Disinterest (AKA: Chase Me Some More) -> Stop chasing, on ICE! Yep gotta resort to the old Push pull for these ones
3. “Invest in Me” Games (Ie.: I’m Higher Value, Pay The Difference) -> Give her tasks to do, instead of you doing tasks for her. Women do need to show their value in a relationship
4. Delay Responses Games -> Take longer to respond or don't respond at all. Leave her on read. a lot of old school PUAs would say to take twice as long but that isn't real high value. A man should always be busy anyways, but it's better to only invest in women that respect your time
5. Wait For Me Games -> Never show up on time and then make her wait. Although, I would prefer to just drop this plate than do that. Agree
6. Cancel The Date Games -> Next, if she doesn't apologise and attempt to reschedule. Shoot the line "how you gna make this up to me?" Men need to have a zero tolerance policy for this
7. Prove Yourself to Me Games (AKA: Dance Monkey Dance) -> Just don't dance? Another **** test. Be playful. This type of sh&t test comes from a strong sense of entitlement, these kind of girls are FWB only nothing more. If you are dating a girl that trys to do this drop her because she lacks respect.
8. Sex Withholding Games -> ICE. zero tolerance
9. Damsel in Distress Games -> ICE. This is very validation seeking, I usually ignore this until they stop
10. “I’m Not That Kind of Girl” Game -> Lol, sure she isn't. Pretend to believe her. This is something to ignore as well, as long as you don't aknowledge it you are good to go

@Zimbabwe thoughts on this?

First to address @anonymous12345 most cases we would just next them if they do this very early on, but I do think your right we could deal with it another way


@Don Dark Horse would say i agree with most points you made, i put my thoughts in Bold. It's very easy for most men to fall for these, I know I have failed a lot of sh*t tests in the past

 

[Don Dark Horse]

First to address @anonymous12345 most cases we would just next them if they do this very early on, but I do think your right we could deal with it another way


@Don Dark Horse would say i agree with most points you made, i put my thoughts in Bold. It's very easy for most men to fall for these, I know I have failed a lot of sh*t tests in the past

Loved reading your thoughts on that and you added angles that I didn't see in some of them. Thanks!

 

[metalwater]

Girls don't play any games.

Guys delude themselves by not following some simple rules:

- Look at their actions, not words
- Interested girls make things easy

Girls don't play games with men they have a high interest in.

Girls play games continuously with men they know have a high interest in them if the man is also chasing. They do it on purpose and with style. Like a ringleader in a circus.

As always the percentage of men that can generate high interest is low. The viewpoint of such a man is very different from one that can not generate high interest.

 

[metalwater]

1. “Look At Me” (While I Don’t Look At You)“
2. Feigning Disinterest (AKA: Chase Me Some More)
3. “Invest in Me” Games (Ie.: I’m Higher Value, Pay The Difference)
4. Delay Responses Games
5. Wait For Me Games
6. Cancel The Date Games
7. Prove Yourself to Me Games (AKA: Dance Monkey Dance)
8. Sex Withholding Games
9. Damsel in Distress Games
10. “I’m Not That Kind of Girl” Game

All of these are good, all of these are symptoms. I have seen lists like this where they are in order, meaning she will do some at medium interest, and some only at medium-high interest level. All of these games are frame war. Any of these are a signal that interest has dropped. Figure out why is your next step. Think about the last days, hours, or weeks, whatever is the relevant time. Any big events that did not go well for you or if any other guy might have come into view such as an hour-long conversation with your best friend or someone else you don't know. You can go tit for tat on these, but they can come faster than you can tit, and it's usually not fun. If you can identify the event that lowered your value to her then you can decide if it's in your core values to change or if she is not compatible with you. Even if you next her it's very useful to know what caused the change so you can filter prospects better or improve yourself.

If you an SMV 8 and she is a 9, all these issues.
If she is a 7 and you a 9, none of these issues.

Women that continue to get ons with chad until 30+ are accepting or chasing men that are higher.
Men that continue to get crappy behavior accept or chase women that are higher. You might think she is the best, but if you don't have these issues your higher value than she is.