Hi. I'm trying to improve my chances with women by getting out a bit more, but I'm finding it very hard to get myself in the kind of scenario where I can meet strangers. Here's the options I've considered:
1. Approaching friends of friends: None of my friends seem to know any attractive women, so I'm ruling this one out. House parties I'm finding are infrequent and whenever I go, are mostly full of blokes. This is what I get for doing an IT course :s.
2. Approaching women in the street: I've tried walking around the town centre, holding eye contact and smiling with women. Some women smile back, but most are too busy going about their own business to take any notice. It would most likely be seen as freaky to stop someone in the street as everyone has been brought up never to talk to strangers. Also people seem so set on getting from A to B, that cold-approaches just seem like harrassment in this kind of situation.
3. Approaching women in shops: So I've looked around some shops trying to work out where all the women go. I can't find the places, and I'm still trying to work it out. I've tried the popular record stores such as HMV and find them to be more full of guys than ladies. I always thought music and films were a multi-gender kind of interest. I could of course go to the laungerie store, but of course that would just be pervy. I've read a tip in a book to ask for advice on buying a present for a women, such as my mum or sister. However no occasions are in the near future for which I should buy presents, and I'm a poor pennieless student!
4. Approaching women in bars/clubs: So I may nowadays be confident enough to do this. However I don't seem to go out very much anymore and it's very hard to drag my friends out. I can imagine going out by yourself to bars would give yourself a weirdo label, and in fact I asked the question on the dilly a while back. Everyone said that they thought it was 'sad' to go out barring alone.
5. Approaching women on public transport: Again, like the street, this is a very public place where everyone seems to be going about their own business. I've actually been on bus journeys where all the seats are taken, and I cannot hear one person talking. This is due to the traditional British reserve and our lack of willingness to talk to strangers.
Has anyone got any advice to help my situation here? I admit that it's probably a part of my philosophy I have to change, but I just can't find the right mindset to approach women in such a reserved community. I am feeling however very frustrated in my lack of ability to meet women, and have been spending too much time on addressing this over the last couple of weeks, alas to no avail. I don't see how I'm meant to start dating women if I can't find a means to meet them.
PS I tried speed dating, it didn't work!
1. Approaching friends of friends: None of my friends seem to know any attractive women, so I'm ruling this one out. House parties I'm finding are infrequent and whenever I go, are mostly full of blokes. This is what I get for doing an IT course :s.
2. Approaching women in the street: I've tried walking around the town centre, holding eye contact and smiling with women. Some women smile back, but most are too busy going about their own business to take any notice. It would most likely be seen as freaky to stop someone in the street as everyone has been brought up never to talk to strangers. Also people seem so set on getting from A to B, that cold-approaches just seem like harrassment in this kind of situation.
3. Approaching women in shops: So I've looked around some shops trying to work out where all the women go. I can't find the places, and I'm still trying to work it out. I've tried the popular record stores such as HMV and find them to be more full of guys than ladies. I always thought music and films were a multi-gender kind of interest. I could of course go to the laungerie store, but of course that would just be pervy. I've read a tip in a book to ask for advice on buying a present for a women, such as my mum or sister. However no occasions are in the near future for which I should buy presents, and I'm a poor pennieless student!
4. Approaching women in bars/clubs: So I may nowadays be confident enough to do this. However I don't seem to go out very much anymore and it's very hard to drag my friends out. I can imagine going out by yourself to bars would give yourself a weirdo label, and in fact I asked the question on the dilly a while back. Everyone said that they thought it was 'sad' to go out barring alone.
5. Approaching women on public transport: Again, like the street, this is a very public place where everyone seems to be going about their own business. I've actually been on bus journeys where all the seats are taken, and I cannot hear one person talking. This is due to the traditional British reserve and our lack of willingness to talk to strangers.
Has anyone got any advice to help my situation here? I admit that it's probably a part of my philosophy I have to change, but I just can't find the right mindset to approach women in such a reserved community. I am feeling however very frustrated in my lack of ability to meet women, and have been spending too much time on addressing this over the last couple of weeks, alas to no avail. I don't see how I'm meant to start dating women if I can't find a means to meet them.
PS I tried speed dating, it didn't work!
