Meeting girl at a Coffee Shop ... a few Q

supam

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Hi Guys. I got this girl off myspace. Ethnic Haitian with some Spanish or whatever, not sure about HB number, I'm divided between 6 and 6.5. 18 and cute lol.

So no game no nada, I just told her I want to find out about her and she should meet me for a coffee. Basically I have a few questions, since I'm a virgin and never been on a date. How do you meet a girl at a coffee place? I mean, so I'm sitting there outside, drinking my coffee, enjoying myself and waiting for her to come, so she comes, we chat. How does she get her coffee? Do I tell her to go get a coffee, do I get it for her? What?

Another thing, I'm going to star bucks, I wonder what I should order for myself. I know I want a coffee, but last time I was there all they had is some fancy shmancy stuff I never heard of. What do I tell them to get me a regular coffee, medium.



M
 

Akuma

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Why would you wait outside? Starbucks usually have newspapers lying around. Just sit inside and pick one. If she doesn’t show up, at least you won’t have wasted your time. Just ask for a regular mild coffee (not a big fan of all the fancy drinks). If she wants anything, she’ll get it herself. You could always say something like “Want anything?”

No need to overanalyse everything, it’ll go just fine.
 

procanto

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A mask? Do you REALLY wear a mask or just pretend to be some one who you are not?
If you really wear a mask then take it off lol
Or if you pretend to be some one else then just be yourself and act comfortable around her and everything will work out :)
Good Luck :)
 

Igetit!

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Dude,you think too much. If this is the kind of mindset you are taking into the date,then it's already over. You want to know what to order? Should you tell her what to order or order for her? Do you want to know what table to sit at,and which side of the table to sit on also? Instead of going on a date,you are acting like you are about to defuse a bomb or something. You've already set the date, so just be cool,and relaxed. If you're all nervous and jumpy when you meet up with her,this will cause her to feel uncomfortable,so chill out. The next time you set up a date,try something active. Go to a mall,and walk around for a little while. Then,if the mall has a food court,go sit down and get something to eat,and hang out for a while.You're so worried about things that really made no difference whatsoever. It's YOU that you should be concerned about,not what you are going to order to drink. The date should be about the two people involved, not the activity you plan on doing. If she doesn't like you,you can take her to her favorite restaurant,order her favorite food,you can take her mall and go to her favorite clothing store,take her to the music store and buy her her favorite cd,and NONE of this will matter.If she doesn't like you,it won't matter how "perfect" the date goes. The opposite is also true. If she likes you,and feels attraction for you,the date (that is,the activity) can be bad,but she'll still want to see you again. One of her friends will ask her,"So how was your date last night?" and she'll say something like,"It was horrilbe. We're going out again next week." So don't sike yourself out by worrying about every minor detail.
 

supam

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awwww, that took a weight off my chest! thanks dude. yea yea yea, I know all these things, but still freaking horrified. not thinking too ahead of myself was working for a while, but then I started thinking about not thinking, and here I am now. Kinda cowering.

Listen, last time I was at star bucks I order cappucino or something, it cost 5 bucks and was like a camel spit in a cup. Seriously, someone tell me what coffee is good? I'm going to star bucks tomorrow alone, just for the heck of it. lawl
 

Mr. Me

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Grab a coffee "tall coffee of the day", and plop into a prominent spot and read the paper, she'll probably be a little late anyway. When she gets there, being how you've never met her before, greet her with a smile and offer to buy her a beverage, it's the "gentlemanly" thing to do and it'll only set you back a few bucks.

Game: Keep the conversation fun and light and just be humorous about it all. Let her do most of the talking.

What you really want to do is observe.

That's the real purpose of this meet n greet over coffee.

When you first get a seat, arrange where she's gonna sit so it's close to your chair and where her view isn't gonna be everything else that's happening around. IOW, her view is kind of restricted to you void of most all distractions.

You wanna see her touch you, even if fleetingly, even if brushing against you lightly by accident. You wanna see her lean forward and see her smile at you and seem engaged with you. If instead you notice she sits down but pulls her chair away from you and sits there with her arms crossed and/or with her bag in between you and her, seeming distant... you get what I mean about watching her body language? That will be your clue as to if she feels chemistry or not.

When you're done with your coffee, stand up and announce that you have to run. Walk her to her car, don't try to hold her hand and don't try to kiss her. You're seeing if she fills in the void. Hopefully she'll say she hopes to hear from you or something like that. DON'T say "I'll call you" or "Let's get together this weekend" or ANYTHING that tips her as to your interest. "It was great meeting you!", shaking hands and walking away is the best.

And if you don't have her phone number yet, THAT'S the time to ask for it.

I can't get into all the reasons why, but I can tell you doing it this way intrigues the hell out of women (unless they don't care for you to begin with, but then, it weeds those out).

I know the other guys are likely to tell you to step up the kino and close the deal, but what I'm outlining for you not only helps you gauge her interest, but amps it up if she is interested.
 

WORKEROUTER

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supam said:
Hi Guys. I got this girl off myspace. Ethnic Haitian with some Spanish or whatever, not sure about HB number, I'm divided between 6 and 6.5. 18 and cute lol.

So no game no nada, I just told her I want to find out about her and she should meet me for a coffee. Basically I have a few questions, since I'm a virgin and never been on a date. How do you meet a girl at a coffee place? I mean, so I'm sitting there outside, drinking my coffee, enjoying myself and waiting for her to come, so she comes, we chat. How does she get her coffee? Do I tell her to go get a coffee, do I get it for her? What?

Another thing, I'm going to star bucks, I wonder what I should order for myself. I know I want a coffee, but last time I was there all they had is some fancy shmancy stuff I never heard of. What do I tell them to get me a regular coffee, medium.



M
Congrats on solidifying the date.

The most common remark I hear about girls when they b*tch about dates is that the guy was totally lame, it felt like an interview, he was way too passive, nice, etc.

So don't be that.

You probably have exceptional qualities about yourself. You know what those are. You know what makes you interesting.

It doesn't matter what you order. Get a tea or a coffee. If you want to spend a couple bucks, grab her a tea or a coffee. I know some will get all pissed off about buying a girl a drink, but the couple bucks really isn't a big deal. I've done it both ways, and I prefer getting the drinks (as long as it's not more than a couple bucks). No, it does not give her the "upper hand." If a couple bucks IS a huge deal, go to a park. Better yet, start focusing on making money (search some threads).

Anyway, at that point grab a table (take the lead), sit back, and have an INTERESTING conversation. Talk about your inner interests, your goals. Let her talk about hers, and LISTEN. Get into the emotional spectrum of the conversation. No one word lame answerrs. Don't let her ask you a hundred questions.

Everyone wants to be heard, so listen. You're the tribal leader, and you need to act like one.
 

Metaphysical

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Dude you are a virgin and you are picky about a woman's looks?

Have sex with her no matter what she looks like, she could be a pig in a wig for all you should care as long as she has a pvssy. Just make sure you get some sex, become picky after you even know what a woman looks like naked!

Some of the ugliest women ive slept with gave me some of the best sex ever.
 
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