May be losing favourite HB - advice anyone?

[bugsquish]

Okay it was probably inevitable, but I'm losing my favourite HB. A little back story, I started out as BF/GF with this chick under some strange circumstances. She was perfect GF material but a past LTR (4 years) has put me off risking another wasted time investment. In other words I have a fear that any LTR is gonna end and all time I put in has been wasted when it could have been invested in screwing lots of HBs. So I decided to do that and instigated an open relationship.

Things have been pretty good. We saw each other fairly often but I had time and freedom to pursue other girls. But at the weekend she went to a party while I went clubbing. I did my usual and even had a ONS. I still don't know what she got up to.

Now here's the killer. Since her party she has blown me off for the first time. She was supposed to come over last night but called to say she was "ill". And she has been cagey about an elusive "something" she wants to talk about. We're going bowling this weekend and she said she "might" come back stay over. There was never any "might" before.

I mean, it's kinda obvious she's met another guy. I'm not a jealous type - but I don't want things between us to detiriorate. If I was able to have a LTR she would be perfect. I love hanging out with her etc.

I'm not seeing her again until Friday when she is coming out with my friends clubbing (she's going home after), then on Saturday we're going bowling and having this "talk".

No oneitis in sight here. I got other options. But she's my favourite. If there's any way to keep things as they are I'd be very pleased. At the very least I'd like to stay friends and keep hanging out. Any thoughts here?

Historical thread of story: http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=35706

 

[squirrels]

If she wants to move on, there's not much you can do. Unless you like the idea of being exclusive (which it doesn't sound like you do ), I'd say let her go.

Not necessarily give up on her...she may decide to play for a little while longer, so get what you can out of her, but don't let her put you in the awkward position of "it's either commit to me, or I go with him." While she may be your favorite, it doesn't sound like you view her as irreplacable.

But then again, wait and see. Don't get all bent out of shape because she bowed out of one meeting.

 

[JohnJones]

She may be trying to break the deadlock herself: she may want to move things along with you and this is part of a plot to accomplish it.

 

[white_hype]

if you dont really care if she leaves, you may want to try to counter it

you could call her up before you guys talk and say lets just be friends.. and see how that goes

she either wants 1- to break up or 2- to get more serious or 3-... shes dying

gl

 

[bugsquish]

Hmm thanks guys. Looks like you'rte right, I might just have to let her go. I don't want to be exclusive. I do. I don't. I do... but I can't When I pushed her about this "thing" she want's to talk about she said she's not happy with the open relationship. So it could be an ultimatum looming, but then I still think she's met someone else. I think she started paying more attention to my faults once I removed the rose tinted glasses, as it were.

Ah well, you live and learn. I think it may be impossible to live my dream of multiple LTRs. Maybe it's got to be one LTR or multiple STRs. That'll sure keep me on my toes.

Girls are so damn flaky. I never know where my next lay is coming from

 

[ShortyBrown]

Ahhhhh Buggy......you poor thing, can't get the regular sex you think should be handed to you on a platter.

She's tired of wondering who you're phucking whenever you can't get it from her. She's realised that there is a downside to letting a man treat her like a human 7-eleven. Deal with it and move on. She ain't comin' back and good on her!

 

[TTAG]

a bit harsh shorty

Originally posted by ShortyBrown
Ahhhhh Buggy......you poor thing, can't get the regular sex you think should be handed to you on a platter.

She's tired of wondering who you're phucking whenever you can't get it from her. She's realised that there is a downside to letting a man treat her like a human 7-eleven. Deal with it and move on. She ain't comin' back and good on her!

the best thing to do is let her know your cool with it, dont call her, email her or see her at all. she'll be back. remember girls are dumb.

 

[bugsquish]

Re: a bit harsh shorty

Originally posted by TTAG
the best thing to do is let her know your cool with it, dont call her, email her or see her at all. she'll be back. remember girls are dumb.

I'm gonna have to blow her off this weekend anyway cuz I got a coldsore I can't seduce a chick when my lips are out of action. But I can be cool with it without ignoring her altogether, I can remind her how sexy I am by teasing her with the scarcity of my presence

And yes, girls are dumb, look at Shorty! Only kidding babe you know I lurve ya x

 

[chlywly]

I feel for ya bud, but such that is life... Not much you can do here except just accept change and freedom Find more women, possibly you'll find someone who will be into a LTR but an open relationship at the same time A truly confident woman.

Good luck to you S'all gooD.

 

[Slickster]

Hey Bug, is this Claire you're talkng about?

Cold sore ouch. Form of herpes isn't it? Have you had yourself checked lately?

 

[Sexy_Malibu]

Originally posted by ShortyBrown
Ahhhhh Buggy......you poor thing, can't get the regular sex you think should be handed to you on a platter.

She's tired of wondering who you're phucking whenever you can't get it from her. She's realised that there is a downside to letting a man treat her like a human 7-eleven. Deal with it and move on. She ain't comin' back and good on her!

ha ha ha ha ha ha as soon as I read this thread I was just WAITING for ShortyBrown to say something!!!!

 

[bugsquish]

Thx chlywly, yup the search goes on! This site really has changed my perspective. The old me would have been depressed at the thought of losing her, but now I take the good with the bad.

Slickster, yup it's the famous Clare Actually she called my mobile phone twice tonight and I let her speculate as to why I didn't answer! I called her later though and told her I couldn't see her this weekend cuz something came up and I had to go to Ayr (my hometown). She said okay and I said did she want to come stay over on Monday? She said yes and seemed quite enthusiastic about it. Let's see if she shows up.

And yes my COLDSORE has totally ****ed me up this week. I cancelled a date last night. I cancelled another one tonight. And tomorrow and Saturday night I cancelled everything with Clare plus visits to my club. Like I said, without my lips my DJ skills are worthless! HERPES? I thought it was thrush... Anyways I been getting coldsores since I was a kid so I doubt it's an STD. And yes I got checked out a few chicks ago...

lol me too Bubu

 

[ShortyBrown]

Originally posted by Sexy_Malibu
ha ha ha ha ha ha as soon as I read this thread I was just WAITING for ShortyBrown to say something!!!!

No phucking lapdance for you then.