Mature Women and Sex

[Tictac]

9 = 9

MrLuvr.

If you will point me to the universal scale of DJ babehood so that we can establish this, I'll play. If you can't, let's not pretend that this is an objective discussion.

If you saw Tina, I thnk that you would agree that she's a knockout. You would have a hard time judging her age other than she's about 40. And this is on every item you mentioned in your message. you wouldn't need to talk to her to see this. If she didn't make you think about moving on her, I would be very surprised.

If no woman that age 'does it' for you. Very well. That does not mean she isn't stunning. It means you don't see it that way.

Tictac

 

[Tictac]

Attention vs. DJ Attention

Tony,

Likely, all you say is true. And realism is key. I don't doubt that she's lookin' and maybe gettin' it somewhere. I am mindful of this. This woman is something of an experiment for me.

Rare though women like her may be, men who know how to handle them are far more rare. That's what I'm looking for. And that's why I'm here. This 'community' is a rare breed. There are clearly not enough of us to go around in the world of women. And that's great!

I have good instincts (except about that marriage thing which I am over). I never had any trouble in my youth and before I was married.

Times have changed, so have I. But the close to universal truths about women and how we treat them, from the genetic hard wiring to the ways that capitalize on who they are and how we handle them is what I seek here.

I play few games. But those I choose to play I am either very good at, making improvements as I stay at the table or improving rapidly at as I learn.

Its context and content. And in the short time I've been here, its been enlightening for both.

So thanks to you and to you all for your insights.

Help me focus on the game, not the pieces and individual moves. In time, I will be able to contribute to the level of play among those who play and think enough of the 'game' to learn and teach here.

Tictac

 

[Tictac]

Guru's posts

Read as many as you can, of Guru's posts.

Jophil,

Which 'Guru'? there are many in the 'Members' list. With the few things you've said here, your advice is easy to accept.

Tictac

 

[guru1000]

To keep the correct context in this initial rapport, here are a few bullets you may find helpful,

- Never compromise the context. She may be a CFO, but she must know who drives the car.

- She is just a non exclusive rapport at this point, so don’t put too much stock into this woman until she proves to be a compatible contender

- Qualify her

- She MUST earn your time and energy; these are your most valuable resources. Do not give these precious commodities away for free and allow her the gift of missing you.

- Do not rush into exclusivity. You sound to be a little emotionally invested. Withdraw your investment and continue to date other women. If she is a worthwhile contender, she will unequivocally prove that in time.

- Look at her past relationships and family history to get a glimpse of what’s in store for you.

- Your power is in the ability to walk away. She will test you to see of what kind of substance you are made. Always, always, always be prepared to exit. She must know that you are rigid in character and do not tolerate any disrespect or BS.

- If one day she merits your exclusivity, give her the gift of your boundaries. This is expressed to make her aware of your expectations going forward

- Her interest level in you is directly influenced by how you view yourself. The most important principle is to never compromise yourself in an effort to maintain her interest.

The rest is child’s play.

 

[Tictac]

Guru1000,
Thanks. for these. Exclusivity is some ways off for me. it was that decision that led me to SS so that I might enjoy the journey.

While many sites and many posters here focus on getting laid (not there's anything wrong with that), my interest is closer to deciding who I am and will be now. I have always enjoyed women. And In my youth I was an 'accidental master'.

This time is different. this will be deliberate, mindful and supremely enjoyable. I don't golf. This is much more interesting.

As all this unfolds, it will be in part because I learn from people like you. I will take Jophil's advice and find your & (and his) posts. Each contributor here has taught me something. I look forward to each visit here.
Tictac

 

[edger]

A word of warning. Many women of your (our) age are goldiggers.

Absolutely. That's why the majority of them hang out at all these "upscale" joints. The "upscale" bar for the most part = wealthy men.It's rare you'll catch them elsewhere. If you wanna catch a hot MILF, that's where you ought to head.

I've f*cked 3 hot MILFs like these in my life. They were awesome. Such good f*cks.

 

[edger]

Older women are easy

Yeah, you wish(not trying to be an a**hole here). That's why a hot MILF I approached a few weeks ago put up a wall the size of Jericho. Easy my ass. I had another one when I was 23 sort of do the same(whom I ended up banging the sh*t out of), but not nearly as bad as this one.

Hot older women(40's) being "easy" probably has to be the biggest fallacy on this board, cause I can tell you from first-hand experience that they're not. MILFS(mid-late 40's) are one group of women I typically hone in on.

 

[Tictac]

Walls & Goldiggers

Both these can be true. At least one is failry easy to spot.

JoPhil raised the goldigger issue. The way through this is qualifying to woman in question. Yes, it takes some time. But during that time, you can break through or lower the wall and, if you play it right, have a good time along the way. Meanwhile, 'she' is qualifying herself (or not).

I don't know this as well as JoPhil and Guru1000 at this point, but they say (or hint) that a woman will likley not be able to hide the goldigger card very well.

As for walls, attractive women of all stripes can have them, moreso if they've been burned. I am finding that some patience with older women is rewarding. Besides, if they're too easy, it takes some of the thrill from the chase. And they are so worth it. You can have them on your terms. No lies, no deception, no bs. Just a (for me, beginning) DJ and a fine woman enjoying each other and the 'dance'.

Tictac

 

[mrRuckus]

Probably not a troll, but just some guy who is prone to exaggeration. Unless he is dating Christie Brinkley, there is no way that this is close to being true. Sorry, but there are NO "9", 50 year olds. No amount of plastic surgery, cosmetics, diet, exercise etc.. etc.. can make a 50 year old woman a 9. Just not happening.

No amount of exercise and perfect diet prevents drooping boobies and wrinkly faces.

 

[robinincarolina]

In the man's defense, older women (over 40) are in their prime. If you have not experienced it, you are missing out. They are perfectly comfortable and in tune with thier bodies. Unihibited. Older men are much better lovers as well. When you young guys grow up, you will figure it out. So if older women are so repulsive to some of you why is it that 45 year old women are constantly being hit on by 20 something year olds? So throw me off I am a woman.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

I tapped my share of older women when I was in my 20s and I can tell you that the sex was no more or less extrordinary than the younger women I've been with. The only major difference? I never had to worry about 22 y.o. single girls finding a babysitter for a night or had to be concerned with her making too much noise during sex so as not to wake up her son in the next room. Nor was I concerned about it being "her weekend" to have the kids.

I think one of the flaws in GURU's logic of vetting 'quality' women in this stage of maturity is that the vast majority of them are at least a one time divorcee by this age. Precious few are in the "never married" or "childless" category by 45, so there's probably going to be a pretty good chance she's established a prior history of a failed relationship. Trust me, they're single for a reason - and it's not always the fault of their Jerk BFs or deadbeat ex-husbands.

Mature women consistently encourage an idea that they are more sexually available; you've got to ask yourself, why would they be motivted to be more sexual while single than when they we're married or in an LTR? They become motivated to be sexual and hit the gym when single, but wouldn't make the same effort when married, why? Because the guy wasn't worth it OR because she became comfortable, he lost interest, became fed up, and she's prompted to be more concerned with all that in order to achieve a long term security with another man that necessitates she do so?

Don't get me wrong, there are attractive women in their 30s & 40s but these are uncommon exceptions to the rule. The social reinforcement of the MILF fantasy is just a modern extension and evolution of the "she's still got it" social convention with the latent purpose of leveling the playing field for 30-40 something single mothers unable to sexually compete for the same calibre men with 18-28 y.o. women. The harsh truth is that a beautiful, childless, sexually available, single woman in her mid 20's is at a decided advantage for sexual selection than a single mother entering her 30's or 40's who's encumbered with all the responsibilities of being a parent.

Women's sexual value naturally declines as they ages - it serves an older woman's purpose if she can redefine sexuality as her conditions change through life, and convince herself and society that she's correct and genuine. Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore may epitomize this fantasy, but in reality, there are thousands of women filling gyms across the country for every Demi Moore convinced that they "still got it" while every year a new crop of 22-24 y.o. hotties commands the attention of the same men they're competing for. This is just the natural extension of the 'Have It All" lie that women have been sold for the last 50 years. Men only too eagerly buy this convention as well because it facilitates a Buffer for them and (presumedly) presents an easier route to getting laid. Therefore it is also in their interest that the myth and the Buffer be reinforced.

 

[easypeezy]

I was married a long time. Well that's over. At 58, I've been going out. And while I was hanging with a 30-year old for a while (wow!), I've found older women (starting mid-40s) to be really exciting. There are some major foxes out there!

Last night, I went out with a woman who would be a 9 on anyone's list, for any age. She's fit, built, funny, smart and sultry. Other than some interesting moments in the parking lot as I got her into her car, I played it right. She's ready to go if I open her up right. Shouln't be a problem and I can't wait!

Now to sex. These women are more cautious than the kiddies. They've definitely go the urge. (Last night's catch hasn't had sex in over a year and she's was on fire! That's good & bad. How have some of you played this? I want her addicted to me so that every guy she meets (and she will meet many) doesn't stack up to me.

I'd like nothing more than to throw her into the bushes. But I can't say that I wouldn't like to have her in the stable or even as a favorite.

Life is busy. I've got kids, a business and a whole lot of stuff to do. But I definitely want her around and finding that other guys just don't cut it.

I've learned a lot here. But I'd like some of you to weigh in. Tell me how its done, what you've learned, how you work it.

Tictac

So DONT treat her like a piece of meat! She needs special attention to keep her around - date her - just cos she hasnt had sex for a year doesnt mean shes gonna fall into bed with you!!!!

 

[robinincarolina]

You younger guys here are going to be older one day and you will look back and say wow, this is so much better than when I was younger, even with kids and resposibilities. There are exceptions to every rule, like every now and then you find a man in his 20s that actually has some sense and can carry on an intelligent converstaion, but its about as rare as an attractive 30 or 40 somthing year old attractive woman.

 

[Tictac]

It Keeps Rolling

This thread has been very helpful, illuminating in fact.

And Robin, so far as I'm concerned, I'm grateful you're here.

Easypeezy, In my mind, no one who aspires to be a DJ ever treats a woman as anything other than with respect, until respect is not returned. I am not interested in sex alone. I've learned that a woman in full is to be enjoyed in full. I am a carnivore. But meat alone is boring and unsatisfying.

Guru1000, I took Jophil's advice and tracked deep into your posts and threads (as I did with his). Thank you both for insights. I would not have found elsewhere (even in the 'DJ Bible') Both of you are wise and respectful, hallmarks of gentlemen and DJ's.

Let me be clear - I love women and have high regard for them. No one who has witnessed child birth (provided their IQ exceeds room temperature) could do otherwise. Women are heroric beings. They are (way) different from men. A DJ is someone that understands the differences, uses that knowledge and celebrates it WITH WOMEN rather than mysoginists or board lurkers.

Jean Valjean I've learned here (mostly from Guru1000 and JoPhil) that there is a divide for aspiring DJs. To be part badazz is to be (not less than) ****y & funny, confident and unpredictable. It means having 'her' know that you will fugitize at the first whiff of disrespect, that you do not expect to be 'exclusive' until and unless the benefits far outweigh the costs (which is unlikely). I trust that others will chime in here to argue, amplify and such.

Treating a woman as a lady and a woman in public while still (tacitly) acknowledging her sexual nature is a good thing. Once you're in private, things change more that I could have ever imagined. A woman can (and should be) feminine one way in public and another way entirely in your bed. The difference is flatly astonishing. That I'm near 60 and just getting this - Oh Well!

This creates something of an emotional rollercoaster for women. It does this via a tension and release cycle both short and long interval. And it does work. It works best though when its the 'real you' rather than a simple parlor trick you to try pull out of a bag. You must let time do its work. You are going for the formula: Great Experiences + Missing You (learned here with apologies to the author). Let time do its work as you enjoy the ride. By the way, this is what women have been doing to men for thousands of years. We're simply 'reversing the flow'. But make no mistake, you are honoring what a woman is and what they want in doing this. That is what they appreciate about a DJ and what makes a DJ invulnerable to PUAs and other interlopers. She cannot find what she has with you anywhere else.

Many parts of the DJ Bible willl help you to see the difference between being a jerk or bad boy and being a good man. I said 'good man' and not 'nice guy'. When you know the difference between these two terms you will know what JoPhil meant. My nice guy is dead. RIP. He already cost me a wife.

I've been running silent on the board here, plowing through the treasures of the DJ Bible. Its a wheat-from-chaff task, but worth it.

Meanwhile I am seeing two women in their 50s (and have several other more casual 'interests', one in her early 30s) You all can argue the levels of babe-i-tude. For me, these women are smokin' and what you think of me is none of my business. More than that, these women are grownups.

This thread and this board have taught me things that I wish I knew in high school. But in the context of mutual respect, these women and I are having wonderful times. Its too bad that I'm 58. That does not mean I cannot finish strong, be the man and enjoy the company of women.

Thank you all. And I do hope that this keeps going.

Tictac