Okay, well thanks to all that could be bothered reading this marathon post, and much appreciation goes ure way. More so to those that posted replys, its a wonder u could be bothered breathing never mind typing after getting through that lot.
Right for a start the writer(me) aint female for any of u that are still on the fence, and as far as im aware, i never have been. Im not hate-filled (most of the time), nor overly twisted, (again, most of the time). I've been in a monogomous relationship for past 4 years (which after spending the last 2hrs looking through this site, probably means ive not got much buisness being here lol), so at best u could say i was plain under-the-thumb bored. Anyway, bugsquish gave me a suggestion last night that i write about guys and nightclubs (i wasnt aware that this site existed at the time, i could have done with the material), my gf has wanted me to try writing from a female point of view for last few months, i figured it was an intresting challenge. Add in to that i wanted to try my hand at present tense writing compared to the usual 3rd person or past tense stuff, and u have the biatch presented above.
I assure u all, if i had imagined it was going to get posted anywhere it would have been very diffrent. 1/4 the lengh for a start. As it was, i was tired, the subject matter was boring, and naturally i twisted it to make it a little more readable. (And failed miserably by the look of the posts lol).I simply decided to turn his suggestion round a bit and give buggy a cautionary tale to see if i could swipe some of his newly-rediscovered DJness from under his feet. The reason the biatch is so extreme is simply because i didnt think for a moment id paint a realistic 'normal' bird, so i went the full hog and just made her plain old mental. Which seems to have made her more believable to some.... draw ure own conclusions.
Anyway, the lassie is loosely my gf, her biatchiness when i first met her magnified to what i thought was pretty drastic surreal levels. The post by iqqi mentioned the overkill of metaphor, and i wholeheartedly agree lol. The problem was i was writing it to be read by buggy and the gf, noone else, and i would hope that bugsquish at least realised that the vast majority of the metaphors were actually the reality. Any of u who have ever been to busy clubs whilst on acid (lsd to the states) should see what im meaning.
I only put the descriptions in metaphor form so my gf whos never wasted her life on RD's wouldnt feel left out, and she'd still be able to follow the descriptions. (My ability to write on two levels is sadly lacking).
And thats pretty much it, the overall "overly critical analysis of today's 'clubbing' environment" (posted by lionheart) comes from the fact ive spent too long on the wrong side of the mahogany in city clubs. By the time the gf got me to pack up bartending i was pretty jaded by the entire scene and prefered a quiet pub with a good jukebox and cheap beer to a club anyday.
So anyway, thanks again to all that replyed and those that read but were asleep by the end. Sorry for taking up ure forum space with something that probably didnt belong here. And cheers to buggy who did me the honour of thinking it did.
I'm a guy, the storys fiction, and it was a surrealistic warning to buggy. Nothing more.
P.S. Holy sh1t starman, my gf has been laughing for the last 10mins at ure first post. I still havent decided whither u were being serious or just have an incredibly dry sense of humour.
