Get this:
Whenever you start taking something for granted, you create a dependency.
Imagine something you’re taking for granted or something you have taken for granted in the past. Let’s say you take your monthly salary, status token, relationship or a provided service to you for granted. When that salary/status/relationship/service is there, it doesn’t really seem like a problem. But what happens when it leaves? You’ll most certainly get frustrated. Why is this? Because you attributed this part of your life onto your ego.
Your form of frustration will most likely take the form of something like this:
(a common characteristic of the ego is putting external changeable conditions onto your identity)
In reality, none of these things are static, and because you stopped appreciating them (by taking them for granted), they started to wither and die.
That’s why gratitude and appreciation are mandatory to life.
The conditions of your life are either growing or dying, and a lot of this is determined by the amount of gratitude and appreciating you express towards them.
That’s why Narrator in Fight club office scene says:
Jack gets his way, because his manager has become completely dependant on everything he has to lose and his job is not built on a foundation of truth.
Another way of explaining this idea of gratitude/appreciation is the all to classic idea of value-giving vs. value-taking.
Value-giving can happen in a lot of different ways, but in social dynamics it usually means raising the amount of positive energy in an interaction, in whatever way you can think of.
I like to use a simple personal example of it:
I work as a pizza delivery guy for about 6 hours a week for some extra cash and because it’s close to my place and a couple of my friends work there. I work Monday’s and Sunday’s. Last week we had an entire week with extra cheap offers for our medium pizza’s. Up until Saturday it had been really successful and smooth business.
Sunday, I was there to work, after about an hour one of the oven’s stops functioning. In the meantime orders kept coming (Sunday is the most busy day of the week). We ended up with a lot of delay and had to apologize to a lot of people.
Anyway, I set out to do my delivery’s. Most people we’re a little bummed it took so long, but accepted our apologies and a small discharge, a few were pissed.
So I get to this particular house to deliver an order (with 30 minutes delay).
Following thing happens:
Chick opens the door with a smile and starts speaking before I can even say anything:
Stop taking things for granted in life, because not only will you be more likely to lose them, they will cause you to suffer even more when you do, because you’ve put yourself in debt with a mandatory of life called Gratitude. Second, genuinely offer value unconditionally in social interactions and your relationships will flourish.
Whenever you start taking something for granted, you create a dependency.
Imagine something you’re taking for granted or something you have taken for granted in the past. Let’s say you take your monthly salary, status token, relationship or a provided service to you for granted. When that salary/status/relationship/service is there, it doesn’t really seem like a problem. But what happens when it leaves? You’ll most certainly get frustrated. Why is this? Because you attributed this part of your life onto your ego.
Your form of frustration will most likely take the form of something like this:
The frustration is the result of the dependency you created by attributing the conditions (salary/status/relationship/service) onto your ego.“Huh? How dare this happen? I am entitled to this.”
(a common characteristic of the ego is putting external changeable conditions onto your identity)
In reality, none of these things are static, and because you stopped appreciating them (by taking them for granted), they started to wither and die.
That’s why gratitude and appreciation are mandatory to life.
The conditions of your life are either growing or dying, and a lot of this is determined by the amount of gratitude and appreciating you express towards them.
That’s why Narrator in Fight club office scene says:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnlm3-tadeI“Under and behind and inside everything this man took for granted something horrible had been growing.”
Jack gets his way, because his manager has become completely dependant on everything he has to lose and his job is not built on a foundation of truth.
Another way of explaining this idea of gratitude/appreciation is the all to classic idea of value-giving vs. value-taking.
Whenever you’re appreciating something or someone, you’re giving it value.ap•pre•ci•a•tion
n.
1. Recognition of the quality, value, significance, or magnitude of people and things.
2. A judgment or opinion, especially a favorable one.
3. An expression of Gratitude.
4. Awareness or delicate perception, especially of aesthetic qualities or values.
5. A rise in value or price, especially over time.
Value-giving can happen in a lot of different ways, but in social dynamics it usually means raising the amount of positive energy in an interaction, in whatever way you can think of.
I like to use a simple personal example of it:
I work as a pizza delivery guy for about 6 hours a week for some extra cash and because it’s close to my place and a couple of my friends work there. I work Monday’s and Sunday’s. Last week we had an entire week with extra cheap offers for our medium pizza’s. Up until Saturday it had been really successful and smooth business.
Sunday, I was there to work, after about an hour one of the oven’s stops functioning. In the meantime orders kept coming (Sunday is the most busy day of the week). We ended up with a lot of delay and had to apologize to a lot of people.
Anyway, I set out to do my delivery’s. Most people we’re a little bummed it took so long, but accepted our apologies and a small discharge, a few were pissed.
So I get to this particular house to deliver an order (with 30 minutes delay).
Following thing happens:
Chick opens the door with a smile and starts speaking before I can even say anything:
It may seem just a simple interaction, but imagine the kind of attitude this woman brings into the world. She got the exact same treatment as everyone else, but her response was quite different. She was clearly giving value, whereas she could’ve just as easily complain about the delay. Yet, she choose to be compassionate and made us both feel good by genuinely appreciating the service our company brought her.“Heey, that’s pretty fast. And that while you got only one oven functioning. This is great.”
Me (surprised and smiling): “Ok, so you already know about our technical problems. Well, we apologize for the inconvenience.”
Chick: “Nooo, it’s no problem at all, you guys must have it really tough to have this in the midst of your stunt week. I’m just glad you could bring my pizza’s anyway.”
Me: “That’s always a good thing to hear.”
*talk about the order*
Chick: “Well, thanks again. Good luck with dealing all those nasty people complaining about the delay and wanting discharges ”
In conclusion:“If you have a choice between being kind and being right. Always pick kind” -Wayne Dyer
Stop taking things for granted in life, because not only will you be more likely to lose them, they will cause you to suffer even more when you do, because you’ve put yourself in debt with a mandatory of life called Gratitude. Second, genuinely offer value unconditionally in social interactions and your relationships will flourish.