Making Male Friends

[CaliGameKickin]

I've lurked the forums on and off for about 6 months, read the DJ bible, and believe I have a very good grasp of what it is to be a DJ. I'll try not to numb any minds with stupid questions, but I do have one thing thats really bothering me.

I've always been rather natural in getting and keeping women. All the material I'm seeing just comfirms things I've heard and know to be true. This is a little off the usual "how to get the girl" subject of discussion, but it's something that I feel like I need to handle in my life and it's something I really would like to know more about.

Not very often do I see threads that discuss how to make friends with other guys.

I have 2 best friends that I've hung out with ever since I was 10, but since then I've moved to California and I just realized how much I had relied on those friendships and not really actively sought friendships with other guys.

Now I'm going to school out here in cali and i don't have any real friends. Sure I have aquaintances at work and school, but nobody that i do stuff with.

I've dated a few women since i moved out here and thats all fine and dandy, but what i really want is some guy friends to kick it with ya know.

HOW DO YOU MAKE FRIENDS?

i know that sounds really silly but i guess i never really learned how. maybe some of you with more friends can discuss making friends a little more with me. thanks

 

[DjDreamer]

Oh yes, this thread sounds realy silly but I understand how it can be an issue for an unconfident loner...

You probably think more freinds means social proof for the ladies but what you fail to realise is that more freinds equates to more potential drama. Haven't you ever watched an episode of jerry springer dealing with girlfreind stealing done by buddy's?

 

[CaliGameKickin]

Originally posted by DjDreamer
Oh yes, this thread sounds realy silly but I understand how it can be an issue for an unconfident loner...

You probably think more freinds means social proof for the ladies but what you fail to realise is that more freinds equates to more potential drama. Haven't you ever watched an episode of jerry springer dealing with girlfreind stealing done by buddy's?

how about somebody with something beneficial to say....

 

[Ice Cold]

I had 2 childhood friends also.

We had nothing to do and our parents were friends, so we really had time to bond and really get to know each other... blah blah


Now, in my late teens I find that there are no real friends. It's just acquaintances you know and have fun with. Sometimes it's even your enemies who you can form a symbiotic relationship with. But it's never a real friendship, like in the one from the childhood.

I guess I got what I want by quantity. I got to know tons of people from different areas, so if I need something, there's usually someone who can help me out.

That's my solution

 

[Aramas]

HOW DO YOU MAKE FRIENDS?

Exactly the same way you pick up chicks - lol.

 

[CaliGameKickin]

Originally posted by Aramas
Exactly the same way you pick up chicks - lol.

aramas: hey dude nice shoes.
dude: thanks they're the new jordans.
aramas: you from around here?
dude: yeah i live over on blah blah st.
aramas: what kind of plans do you have for xmas?
dude: blah blah blah
aramas: (some open ended question, maybe a neg hit or two and some c&f...)
dude: haha you're a funny guy.
aramas: yeah... sooo... id like to see you again sometime... do you have a number i can reach you at?
dude: are you gay?
aramas: yes.

 

[DjDreamer]

LoL

 

[jakethasnake]

hehe

 

[Big Pappy]

Okie dokie, brother man. I'm a bit sloshed, and I've some updating to do, but Big Pappy is here to lead you to the straight path. Of course, you should really run from anyone who refers to himself in the third person.

Before I can advise, I need to know if you're used to drinking on a fairly regular basis.

If so, just pick a favorite sport, then a favorite sport team and go to a sports bar.

If not, go to a gym, work out and talk to the guys who are better at it than you. Natural bonds will form. Join professional organizations. Volunteer at certain places...


'nuff said.

 

[Austin Allegro]

Easy - just find a guy and LJBF him!

 

[Aramas]

Originally posted by CaliGameKickin
aramas: hey dude nice shoes.
dude: thanks they're the new jordans.
aramas: you from around here?
dude: yeah i live over on blah blah st.
aramas: what kind of plans do you have for xmas?
dude: blah blah blah
aramas: (some open ended question, maybe a neg hit or two and some c&f...)
dude: haha you're a funny guy.
aramas: yeah... sooo... id like to see you again sometime... do you have a number i can reach you at?
dude: are you gay?
aramas: yes.

lol - if that's even vaguely the way you talk to girls then I can see why you're here. God that was a sad attempt at conversation.

Just for the socially handicapped you befriend guys or chicks by taking an interest in them (how's your gf? How did you go in that maths test? etc.), making arangements to do stuff (hey - wanna hit the bar, get ****faced and embarrass ourselves horribly?), and getting involved in their lives - doh.

All these silly children that make laughably naive and foolish comments then all high five each other are a riot. Us grown ups are all so impressed by your leet DJness and your insightful commentary on human behaviour that we are completely underwhelmed. Of course we also get to laugh our arses off at your amusing attempts to hit on girls when we're clubbing - you guys make it easy for us - thanks

"The only redeeming feature of youth is that it wears off"

 

[Oxide]

This actually a very good question. I have some good friends, but most of them are scattered around the world making it tough to keep in touch.


With guys, i believe it is important to show that you arent all talk- this goes for everyone. You have to do things and dont worry about what others think. Say what u mean to say, do what u wanna do.

Dont call too often, dont get discouraged if he doesnt wanna hang out, some people think its weird when people come up to them and try to make friends.

Try going out and doing something fun together. Casino is a good choice.

If u are in cali, look up some DJ's , there are tons in cali i hear.

 

[chili kat]

Like Pappy said, sports are a great primer for making new friends. I moved to FL recently, and in an area where everyone loves the Bucs or Dolphins, I stuck with my Patriots. First guy I chatted sports with happened to be a Pats fan too. BAM! Instant buddy.

I've also made a few friends out of Bucs fans too. I just teased them that thier team sucks balloon knot.

 

[DEKKA]

yeah dude don't listen to the haters. this is a very good question. there's lots of people out there that wish they had more friends. most people are open to making new friends. all ya gotta do is take an interest in somebody without seeming like a retard. i think co-ed softball(and other sports), clubs (like the rotary club or the masons), etc.

i wish i could go into a little more detail on how to make friends but i cant think of anything for you at the moment.

 

[Ricky]

Some of my best new friends I made by becoming a regular at a bar or two.

 

[sprinter911]

I have 4 friends that i can truly say are my friends, i have alot of people i can hang out with. I have met most of them by playing alot of sports and working out. Usually it works like this i play a pick up game of bball with a few guys and i say hey lets play again whats ur number and they usually are all excited about playing bball so i call them set up games then after awhile after games we go out to drink and before you know it you have a friend or an associate, difference is your friend will never stab you in the back and thats been verified an associates are good to hang with but your not certain about them.

 

[Phoebus]

Aramas Was Right

Make fun of Aramas all you like, but he is right. Making friends and picking up women are much the same; display an interest in that person. I have used nearly identical techniques in both situations. SS will suggest you illicit values. "Why do you like that?" Well, guess what? Works with men as well as women. While playing foos ball (sp?) with a guy at the bar the other night, I asked, "Why do you like foos ball so much?" He replied with, "I played soccer for such and such school." I said, "Oh, yeah, do you know xxx, who played for my school? He was one of my best friends? He now works for Major League Soccer..." That's all it took. People like you, if YOU LIKE THEM. Everyone seeks acceptance. Be the one to hand that out.

 

[Celadus]

I smoked weed for a month and made a bunch of friends. I wouldn't do it again, but I made good quality friends from it. Track team, lacrosse team, fraternities, stoners, etc.

It really helped me make a ton of friends, but weed is dumb. It makes me feel bad, but if I hadn't done it I'd be sitting in the cafeteria by myself and very depressed.

I doubt the same thing would work for me, but it helped me a lot.

 

[Ofus]

Find some guys that seem pretty cool, then invite them to go drinking sometime. Nothing brings people together more than a little alcohol abuse!