maintaining high IL...Help!

[golf299]

thanks for all the advice and points of views guys...

contrary to what some of you believe, i dont think my showing up will creep her out. let me lay it out for you...

--went on a weekend trip with her, her bestfriend and her bestfriend's bf (who is also one of my really good friends) this is when i met her. i worked the kino, etc... i got her number after the trip was over and we went our separate ways.

--i hear through the grapevine that she was asking about me a lot after that...

--a couple weeks later she calls me to go on a group date... i go, we kino, etc again.

--i call her over thanksgiving. thats when all the good stuff goes down. i've known her since september at this point. i go with heavy kino, and she is VERY receptive. we kiss, multiple time.

--during the course of the evening she mentions that she has a choir performance at school where she has a looong solo. me and my buddy joke that "we'll be there". she says "no, you can't come, i'll be so nervous". we talk about it a little more and thats it. but, the seed has been planted, whether she remembers or not.

--im going with her best girl-friend (who is also bringing her bf, my good friend.) basically, at this point we are all friends and used to hanging out with each other.

i dont see how i could creep her out by showing up. her best girl-friend doesnt think it would be wierd either.

 

[syemour]

dude your gonna fvck it up. take the advice, dont go. call her and set up a date. but its your life.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

First of all I completely agree with everyone giving advice to you; DON'T GO ON THE TRIP!!

But I don't think you shouldn't go because it will creep her out, I think you shouldn't go because she will THINK ABOUT YOU because you said she's already use to the 4 of you guys together. What will her thinking about you do? Raise her interest level in you!!! Dood its already pretty obivious that your falling for this girl. I don't think you have One-itis yet, but its getting there!!! Here's a personal example to help you see the light better.

When you go out with a girl and have a great time the attraction is already present. Elevating attraction comes with doing illogical things because your dealing with WOMEN!!! So not calling, not visiting and not WORRYING makes you more attractive to her! She'll think you lay HB's all the time and she's just another one on your list. She'll think that to get you she has to work harder and that will just put you in the driver's seat.


DO NOT GO!!! DO NOT GO!! DO NOT GO!!

If you want to end up in a LJBF type of situation, then by all means carry out your plan.


YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!


PIMP

 

[golf299]

UPDATE...

well, i did what everyone told me not to do... i went to see her last night. i'm all for making mistakes and learning from them, but it still remains to be seen if this was a mistake.

we went there and surprised her, and she was mega-surprised... she started to kino me right away. one of the first things out of her mouth was "we'll have to definitley go out and get something to eat after this..." she definitley was not creeped out in the slightest.

she made mention a couple times of the specific day she will be home this week, and finally after the 2nd or 3rd time i said "we'll definitley get together then" and she like "yeah, i have your number now too " (since she didnt have it for a while).

at one point while we were all talking she mentioned that she got and 'A' on her test over the male reproductive system...she said this while looking directly at me.

look, here's the thing... i didnt think i would ruin it if i showed up there, and after having gone, im sure i didnt ruin anything. the advice on this site is good for the most part, but you have to follow your gut sometimes. different situations call for different actions. and since every girl is different, you can't just give blanketed advice that "covers everything and everyone". it just doenst work like that. for some girls, showing up and surprising her may have done me in, maybe even creeped her out...but not with this one.

good kino, good times...

 

[golf299]

any follow-up advice/ flaming?

 

[Jake Steed]

well, i did what everyone told me not to do... i went to see her last night.--golf

Then why did you ever come here in the first place and ask for the advice?

This is classic kiddie stuff. Someone comes on here with a "problem", they get advice, then they do the exact opposite of what they were advised to do. So what's the point? Why did I even waste my time trying to help you? Did you just want me to tell you what you wanted to hear, that you should stalk this girl?

So, she didn't turn and run screaming. Good for you. Believe me, I'm really glad for you that she seems to still like you.

However, my advice still stands, and her not running screaming doesn't mean she's going to fvck you. Any other hints you think you are taking from her, like her talking about male anatomy and supposedly looking at you, are suspect to me because clearly you were LOOKING for clues that she likes you so you could come back here to this board and "prove us all wrong." My advice still stands, but I am through with this worthless thread anyway, so maybe some of the other guys on here will try to help you out. I say all bets are off until you fvck her.

"and since every girl is different, you can't just give blanketed advice that "covers everything and everyone".--golf

Warning--I'm about to go off so if you can't take a harsh statement, don't read further...

KID. THIS IS A **GENERAL ADVICE BOARD**. I AM GIVING YOU *GENERAL* ADVICE. AM I SUPPOSED TO READ HER FVCKING MIND? DO NOT COME HERE AND CRITICIZE MY ADVICE FOR BEING GENERAL BECAUSE **THAT**'S WHAT IT IS. GENERAL. NO SHYT, EVERY GIRL IS DIFFERENT. I SAY THAT ALL THE TIME. BUT WHAT DO YOU EXPECT, US TO JUMP INTO YOUR LIFE AND DO IT ALL FOR YOU? YOU EITHER WANT ADVICE OR YOU DON'T. IF YOU DON'T, GET LOST AND GOOD LUCK.

Jake

 

[OpenMind]

i couldnt have said it better myself jake!

 

[golf299]

hey man, calm down...

i wasnt trying to say your advice was worthless or anything like that. i posted my question to get advice, not with the intent of invalidating this site or the advice given here. but i have no responsibility to follow it... you guys just simply didnt convince me that your advice was tantamount to my feeling.

i just see a lot of people on here claming that they advice they give is the only way to go. i think a pitfall of this site is just that: narrowmindedness.

i thank you for the advice, and you shouldnt take it as a shot to your ego that i didnt follow it in this instance...

thanks again

 

[InstantDJ]

Maintain Challenge

Any idea how you maintain high challenge and increase her interest level? If they ask you questions, if you don't answer it, then it sound not polite.

Any suggestions?