Maintain interest after 1st date

[WinstonPatagonia]

Hey guys. I met a girl two weekends ago through my hiking meetup group. Got her number and we went out this weekend. Great time, got drinks, made out. One thing that was a little weird was that she kept talking about her exes but I think she was just being nervous/insecure. She was very clear during the start of the date that she doesn't put out on the first date. We ended getting wasted and she spent the night at my place but was adamant about her rule when I tried to escalate. Whatever still had fun. Next morning I dropped her off and she started texting me throughtout the day saying how much fun she had blah blah.

Now I really want to go out with her again but the problem is a travel a lot for my job and left to go on a business trip for the next three weeks. I want to set up another date with her but not sure how I do that and keep interest levels high during the next couple weeks without violating advice on being a texting buddy or "e-relationship" status. What's is your advice on this? How often should I contact her during this time if at all. I just got an email from her wishing me a safe flight and trip but haven't responded. She I just chat her up every couple days or so until I'm closer to being back home?

Any other critique about the date is welcomed too.

Thanks,
Winston

 

[Rival]

Could be a stretch but If she is talking about her exes on the first date she may not be over them yet. However I don't know her age so she could just be making conversation (though I'm not a fan of the ex talk on the first date regardless)..It's good she text you after you dropped her off that she had a great time etc. Judging from what you said her interest level seems high.

I'd hit her up every few days if you actually want to talk to her (if not don't worry about it), make sure she knows you ARE taking her out when you get back regardless. If you are texting just match her Interest Level. Don't get caught saying you miss her or are excited to see her when you get back, leave that to her.

I wouldn't recommend going silent the entire 3 weeks though, that's a long time.

 

[WinstonPatagonia]

Thanks for the response Rival.

Yeah I don't enjoy talk about exes either so when she did that I brought up some of mine and I think she took the hint bc she stopped after that.

So I followed your advice and didn't text her until this morning since I found out I was going to be home Friday so I invited her to lunch (she's going out of town for a few days that night). Here was the text exchange:

Me: hey I'm going to be back Friday, want to grab lunch or something before you leave?
Her: Ah I cant. Our managers are ordering us lunch bc its going to be crazy busy on Friday :/
Her: Next week!
Me: That's ok, you can just bring me coffee and a bagel on your way to work instead
Me: I'll let you know about next week, I'm gone until at least Thursday
Her: Or u can bring me that since i actually have to work in an office n drive farther to get here lol
Her: I assume you're working from home?
Me: lol. That would involve me putting on clothes and leaving my apartment......so no
Her: God you are sooo lazy


That's basically it. How would you gauge her interest based on this. Should I not say anything further and just wait until next week to call her? Sorry for the likely simple questions.....recently got out of a LTR and am a little raw at this

 

[Rival]

Well she canceled on you but did try to set up another time to hang out. So that's good.
bring her food text is some sort of **** test/or she's trying to play hard to get

I liked your responses though. Your first text I would have said like this

"hey I'm going to be back friday, let's grab lunch or something before I leave again"

I think she is interested though based off what i've seen

gl man

 

[backbeat]

y do u guys wanna be all c0cky n funny with broads that dont give 2 sh@ts bout u? they dont fu@kin care cuz they blowin ur @ss off. dont feed em n e more fu@kin attention. if they dont wanna go out with yo @ss fu@k em. the more u act all c0cky n funny when they blowin ur @ss off u look like a fu@kin clown to em. the broad should b sayin yes to u if she wanna go. not givin u excuses to y she cant go . if shes makin n excuse move on to the next cuz shes gonna give u more fu@kin excuses when u keep on askin.

 

[RangerMIke]

Talking about exes on a first date is normal. I hope you were listening because she was giving you clues on what she likes and doesn't like. You should have been asking why they broke up... you can learn a lot from a women by what she says about her past lovers.

I wouldn't read too much into that. Talking about exes isn't a bad thing... just an opportunity to collect intel.

Okay... you're interested in this girl...DON'T BECOME A NEEDY *****. You are going to be tempted to text her when you are gone... DON'T DO IT. If she contacts you then tell her you want to see her again when you get back and make a date... don't make excuses. Don't tell her what you are doing you are just out of town.

If she has high interest in you three weeks won't matter... if anything it will increase her interest if you don't act like a woman and start vomiting your emotions over text.

 

[Octogonal]

Keep her on her backburner with some communicaton until you get back. Meet new girls, and if she cancels again next her.