LTR total lack of respect

[Phoenixx]

Hey guys,

I have been in a long term relationship with a girl for about 18 months now and just last month things started to get strange. For some reason she had a argument with one of her friends a while ago and stopped talking to her friends for about 6 months. Just recently she went out with them and ever since that she is constantly putting their needs before mine, if they want to see her one day she will cancel me and if they rearrange I can come to hers yipee . Well yesterday I told her my concerns and she was shocked and said shes sorry she just hasnt seen them for awhile and she would make it up to me tmrw.

So i go to hers today and she is with the boyfriend of her best friend and they ahve bought weed together which she knows i am against not because its a drug but because of the awful effect it has on her personality. Anyway all 3 of us just sit in her garden talking and I am so mad but i dont say anything! I then ask her to come with me alone for awhile and she won't do it, she eventually does and i say im going to leave because im tired and need my bed, to which she keeps worrying asking "are you mad at me!"

I basically say im not appreciated by her as much as i used to be and she blows and accuses me of not letting her do anything, she then says i should go home and calm down to which i say if I do then we are finished.....to which she seemed shocked but i thinks he thought was bluffing.

Basically she tells me each day shes madly in love with me so i am getting some very weird mixed signals....whats going on and should I go no contact on her for abit or what?

Thanks for the advice

 

[5string]

I would. Keep your distance. Bet she'll come runnin' back for the attention you have not been giving her.

At that point, you'll have to decide how you want to play it out, ie:
Stay NC
Give her some attention while still maintaining some distance
Get infected with a new case of oneitis

I just hate that when they say "are you mad at me"?

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Actions speak louder then words

 

[Phoenixx]

So if i ignore her she should come running back? After today im not really sure thats what i want. But unfortunately the little voice inside me is begging for her back...how long does this oneitis last?

 

[vatoloco]

Just recently she went out with them and ever since that she is constantly putting their needs before mine, if they want to see her one day she will cancel me and if they rearrange I can come to hers yipee . Well yesterday I told her my concerns and she was shocked and said shes sorry she just hasnt seen them for awhile and she would make it up to me tmrw.

So i go to hers today and she is with the boyfriend of her best friend and they ahve bought weed together which she knows i am against not because its a drug but because of the awful effect it has on her personality.

Personally, these are deal-breakers. Are they for you?

Anyway all 3 of us just sit in her garden talking and I am so mad but i dont say anything! I then ask her to come with me alone for awhile and she won't do it, she eventually does and i say im going to leave because im tired and need my bed, to which she keeps worrying asking "are you mad at me!"

I'm sorry my friend but the big mistake here was sticking around, being the third wheel to your girlfriend's date with the guy. Yes, you read that right. She was out on a date with weed boy. Doesn't that bother you?

I basically say im not appreciated by her as much as i used to be and she blows and accuses me of not letting her do anything, she then says i should go home and calm down to which i say if I do then we are finished.....to which she seemed shocked but i thinks he thought was bluffing.

Basically she tells me each day shes madly in love with me so i am getting some very weird mixed signals....whats going on and should I go no contact on her for abit or what?

Thanks for the advice

Dude, personally, I'd drop this girl as she's not quality but if you wanna stick it out (I wouldn't), yes, go No Contact. See if she calls you.

Hopefully she won't and you will have dodged a bullet.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Your LTR has TLR.

 

[Tiguere]

getting high with her best friends boyfriend. this girl is a h0e and you know it. drop her.

 

[Masculinity]

She sounds like a drama queen and the fact she cancels on you and smokes weed (alone) AND with some dude...ehhh. She's gonna f**k him one of these days, It's simply a matter of time and you will hear this sentence or something similar " I'm sorry, I was just high and not thinking straight" and with you seemingly bad case of oneitis, you'll crawl right back to her like a baby.

 

[x86]

In a LTR you have to be honest.

I then ask her to come with me alone for awhile and she won't do it, she eventually does and i say im going to leave because im tired and need my bed, to which she keeps worrying asking "are you mad at me!"

The answer is "yes and it is disrespectful to me". If my LTR disrespected me like that I would not be in a LTR and would isntead back in the field.

 

[terran2k]

just be honest all together. LTR or not.
not brutally or stupidly honest, but honest.