LTR, gf was detained and deported.

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
chance said:
why not move to mexico if you really love her? start anew life with her. lol.
Not gonna happen man. I am not gonna give up my job and leave my family and everything behind over this. Gotta get real and see the forest for the trees here. Suppose I did move there and time goes by and it didn't work, then what?


Yea I love her, as she does me. We discussed this, and she said so herself that she wants me to move on because she loves me, because she wants me to have a better than life than what we would have there. And so it was the last time we spoke and the last time we will. We agreed that we are both just better off avoiding contact at this point, the sooner we accept the reality of the situation and let go and move on, the better.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,586
Reaction score
339
Age
34
Location
Atlanta
When you find your real wife you would be willing to move with her. This girl juat wasnt it.
 

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
PrettyBoyAJ said:
When you find your real wife you would be willing to move with her. This girl juat wasnt it.
I respect this comment and agree with it to a degree. But the thing is whether you think one is "the one" or not, women are a gamble. And while I do believe I would be content spending my life with this girl, I just can't put all my eggs in this basket under these circumstances. Moving to Mexico just is not practical.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,586
Reaction score
339
Age
34
Location
Atlanta
Exactly. You summed it up yourself.
 

HeMan

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 17, 2009
Messages
112
Reaction score
2
sorry to hear that dude

i just had similar experience with overseas girlfriend apart from her being deported

we had to marry in short space of time otherwise she would get kicked out country

marriage was a huge step in such a small space of time but i really loved her too

basically due to so much pressure over it we ended up breaking up and she went home..

dam its tough especially when you love each other so much

best way to stay positive is to reaslise deep down how hard overseas romances are. they will be completely dependent on you without there families here that causes huge amount of pressure. was she close to her family ?
 

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
HeMan said:
sorry to hear that dude

i just had similar experience with overseas girlfriend apart from her being deported

we had to marry in short space of time otherwise she would get kicked out country

marriage was a huge step in such a small space of time but i really loved her too

basically due to so much pressure over it we ended up breaking up and she went home..

dam its tough especially when you love each other so much

best way to stay positive is to reaslise deep down how hard overseas romances are. they will be completely dependent on you without there families here that causes huge amount of pressure. was she close to her family ?
Hey man thanks and sorry for your loss as well.

The thing with us was marriage was no longer even an option when this went down. It was simply too late. Unbeknownst to me apparently her and her family were given a voluntary deportation that they neglected to abide by, and that's why she was given this order of deportation.

The immigration laws are so harsh and strict right now, that the more I read into this the more I realized how hopeless it was. Marriage, having a kid in the States, any of that, means nothing these days if entered illegally or deported.

Talking to her on the phone did nothing but increase the pain for both of us, and shortly we realized we were just pipe dreaming about me moving there and what not.

Bottom line I've learned is getting involved with someone in a situation like this is just asking for problems and heart ache, it ain't worth it.
 

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
MyTeamSupreme said:
if you knew she wasnt a citizen why were you dragging your feet to marry her
Well at this point I'm glad I didn't cause at the time I wasn't aware of these harsh immigration laws. Even if I would have she STILL would have to go back to Mexico and wait 10 years before legally being able to reenter.

Anyone that enters illegally and overstays a voluntary deportation gets hit with a 10 year ban, regardless of marriage or kids. They don't play that anymore.

They have cracked down on these laws so much that it just would not have been worth it, nor is it worth pursuing any further.
 

shizz702

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2011
Messages
374
Reaction score
8
Well we have been keeping in touch and talking on the phone daily.

Where it stands now she says her mom is going to move back there with her and acquired a nice bit of money selling their cars and assets, and they plan on buying a house in a beach area down there.

She wants me to move there with them, and said no worries on me working or anything, that she would take care of me and her family is totally cool with me living with them. On top of that she even said if for some reason it weren't to work out she wouldn't leave me hanging and break me off with a nice chunk of change for my troubles. I know to judge a woman by actions and not words, but knowing her I know she is a woman of her word. She also said we could get married asap as soon as I get there.

I am still not sure and am weighing my options. We pretty much agreed that we will give it some time and if 6 months from now or so if we are still unhappy and want to be together we may consider me moving down there. But before making a bold move like that I have got to give it some time. We will see.

I think I am going to put in for some vacation time and see her in the summer as well and see how she is doing, and what I would be getting myself into.
 
Top